Post here and I'll insult you, Shakespearean style.

[RevolutionaryActs]

I'm pissy today, so post here and I'll abuse you. :evilgrin:

[applegrove]

1. What ho - thoust eye is puffy!

[RevolutionaryActs]

5. Thou art a cockered pox-marked pigeon-egg!

[applegrove]

14. Seriously - doctors today diagnosed Shakespear with lymphomac

cancer due to "puffy eye" in two of the paintings meant to be him. I think these doctors need to work for an HMO.

[RevolutionaryActs]

23. Weird.

Do they have nothing better to do? :shrug:

[applegrove]

30. You think they could find a pro-bono patient who was still alive.

[tarkus]

2. I'm posting here instead of writing about "Candide"

I may never get any work done...

[RevolutionaryActs]

8. Back to work! Thou venomed hell-hated puttock!

Do you want to play along at home?
http://www.pangloss.com/seidel/Shaker/index.html?

[tarkus]

24. And www.pangloss.com is a reference to a character in Candide!

What a coincidence.
But probably not enough material for a paper...

[catbert836]

58. Even though you're having trouble writing,

I'm sure you'd agree with me that everything is for the best, in this, the best of all possible worlds.

[tarkus]

63. So true...

And there really could not possibly be a better time for me to do this for my history class than during our World War I unit.

[Liberalynn]

3. Okay I am in for some "exposure therapy"

[RevolutionaryActs]

9. Thou hath not so much brain as ear wax.

[Liberalynn]

66. That's Incredible!

How did you know I have an excessive earwax problem? The amazing Sheakspere knoweth all.

:rofl:

[miss_american_pie]

4. Go for it

;)

[RevolutionaryActs]

10. Thou art a cullionly pottle-deep clotpole!

[miss_american_pie]

18. I suppose it could have been worse

;)

[RevolutionaryActs]

19. Thou crusty botch of nature!

:P

[miss_american_pie]

22. Yep, that's worse

:rofl:

[ZombieNixon]

6. Insulteth!

[RevolutionaryActs]

12. Your brain is as dry as the remainder biscuit after a voyage.

[In_The_Wind]

7. Thou would not!

Would thee?

[RevolutionaryActs]

15. Thou dissembling plume-plucked miscreant!

:o

[In_The_Wind]

26. Thou mewling lily-livered minnow!

[RevolutionaryActs]

28. Hahaha!

:D

[Guava Jelly]

11. bringeth it on

and a pox apon your brethren

[RevolutionaryActs]

16. Thou gleeking fen-sucked ratsbane!

I think that's my favorite so far. :rofl:

[Dave Reynolds]

13. Were you not pissy yesterday, too?

Just askin'...:popcorn:

[RevolutionaryActs]

17. No, the lounge was pissy.

So there. :P



Oh yeah, your insult:


Were I like thee I'd throw away myself.

[aQuArius]

20. Doust thou bite your thumb at me sir?

:P

[RevolutionaryActs]

21. Thou art a warped clay-brained scut!

[aQuArius]

41. I think thou wast created for men to breath themselves upon thee.

:bounce:

[RevolutionaryActs]

43. Thou misbegotten onion-eyed hedge-pig!

That's my new favorite! :bounce:

[aQuArius]

46. Thou cullionly plume-plucked canker-blossom!

:hi:

[RevolutionaryActs]

47. OMG!

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_mesg&forum=105&topic_id=4793726&mesg_id=4793808


:o

[aQuArius]

50. Thou impertinent common-kissing flax-wench!

Freakishly duped! LOL I found the insulter about six months ago, lol!

[RevolutionaryActs]

53. Thou yeasty rump-fed giglet!

:rofl:

[aQuArius]

60. Thou churlish bat-fowling dewberry!

:bounce: :wow:

[RevolutionaryActs]

73. Thou fawning boil-brained horn-beast

:woohoo:

[aQuArius]

78. Thou puking flap-mouthed horn-beast!

Wierd, I was waiting to use that one when you responded :tinfoilhat: FREAKY! :scared:

[RevolutionaryActs]

80. Thou droning lily-livered scullian!

Eeek! We're like twins or something. :o

[aQuArius]

82. Thou caluminous onion-eyed malcontent!

Onions! In your eyes, that must sting. :rofl:

[RevolutionaryActs]

83. Thine horrid image doth unfix my hair.

[aQuArius]

85. I shall live to knock thy brains out.

:spray: :rofl: I :loveya: that smilie! Its perfect!

[RevolutionaryActs]

86. Thou qualling tickle-brained jolt-head!

I :loveya: that smiley too. :7

[aQuArius]

87. Thou currish dizzy-eyed strumpet!

Like this:

:crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy:

[RevolutionaryActs]

88. Thou vain dread-bolted bladder!

COOL! I've always wanted to be a strumpet. :bounce:

[aQuArius]

89. Thou tottering unchin-snouted harpy!

Didn't know a bladder could be vain AND had no idea anyhting could actualy be dread-bolted. Trying to get the image in my mind! :*

[RevolutionaryActs]

90. Thou spleeny scurvy-valiant baggage!

I didn't know baggage had spleens. :shrug:

[aQuArius]

91. OMG! To end all insults.... Look what it gave me!

Do you set down your name in the scroll of youth, that are written down old with all the characters of age? Have you not a moist eye, a dry hand, a yellow cheek, a white beard, a decreasing leg, an increasing belly? Is not your voice broken, your wind short, your chin double, your wit single, and every part about you blasted with antiquity? And will you yet call yourself young? :WOW:

[RevolutionaryActs]

92. Whoa! You win!

[aQuArius]

93. That's right...

:spank:

[RevolutionaryActs]

94. Wait! I'm back in the running, look what it just gave me!

Why dost thou converse with that trunk of humours, that bolting-hutch of beastliness, that swollen parcel of dropsies, that huge bombard of sack, that stuffed cloak-bag of guts, that roasted Manningtree ox with pudding in his belly, that reverend vice, that grey Iniquity, that father ruffian, that vanity in years?

[aQuArius]

95. Oh yeah???? Take this!

Wherein good, but to taste sack and drink it? Wherein neat and cleanly, but to carve a capon and eat it? Wherein cunning, but in craft? Wherein crafty but in villainy? Wherein villainous, but in all things? Wherein worthy but in nothing? :woohoo:

[RevolutionaryActs]

96. D'oh!

[ContraBass Black]

39. If you hadn't, I would have.

:D

[Jade Fox]

25. Thy countenance doth set my hounds to howling!

That's my Shakespearean insult!

[RevolutionaryActs]

27. Thou qualling malmsey-nosed maggot-pie!

:P

[Jara sang]

29. fiendish harlot

thy name beist Rev_Acts.

[RevolutionaryActs]

31. You speak unskilfully: or, if your knowledge be more, it is much darkened

[Jara sang]

32. What doesith thou meanist byist this treachery???

Thou hast besmichened mine honor. Ye wench.

[RevolutionaryActs]

34. How now, wool-sack, what mutter you?

[Hand]

33. To't then, thou withered bull's pizzle! nt

[RevolutionaryActs]

35. Thou wayward crook-pated baggage

Away with thee!

[Hand]

37. Hmm, not bad...

"malmsey-nosed maggot-pie" is still my favorite. :rofl: :applause: We have much more fun than the Freepers.

[name not needed]

36. this better be good

[RevolutionaryActs]

38. Hence, horrible villain, or I'll spurn thine eyes like balls before me;

I'll unhair thy head, Thou shalt be whipp'd with wire, and stew'd'in brine, smarting in lingering pickle.

[cynatnite]

40. Kinda looks like a king james version of abuse

:rofl:

[RevolutionaryActs]

44. Away with thee! Thou bawdy malmsey-nosed foot-licker!

:P

[applegrove]

42. Do tell ? There is a Shake insults dictionary website out there. Yes?

[RevolutionaryActs]

45. You mean this?

http://www.pangloss.com/seidel/Shaker/index.html?



:7 :hi:
It's my new favorite toy.

[applegrove]

48. Thou cullionly plume-plucked canker-blossom! LOL .. I WON!!

:woohoo:

[RevolutionaryActs]

49. LOL! OMG

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_mesg&forum=105&topic_id=4793527&mesg_id=4793809

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_mesg&forum=105&topic_id=4793726&mesg_id=4793808

[applegrove]

51. DARN!

:blush:

[RevolutionaryActs]

54. It's ok.

Thou gleeking dread-bolted blind-worm. :P

[applegrove]

59. Thou whoreson mandrake!

[applegrove]

71. Thy words tithe only to the colony of gods betwixt thou toes

[RevolutionaryActs]

74. Thou bootless beetle-headed nut-hook!

[ghostsofgiants]

52. Piss away, cliquemate.

[RevolutionaryActs]

55. Thou appeareth nothing to me but a foul and pestilent congregation of va

:7

[ghostsofgiants]

56. What the crap is a va?

:P

[RevolutionaryActs]

61. Aw crap.

It was "Vapors"

[ghostsofgiants]

64. Haha, alright, fair enough.

[RevolutionaryActs]

67. Thou mad mustachio purple-hued maltworms!

[ghostsofgiants]

77. Rev, you need a nap.

[RevolutionaryActs]

79. No! Thou frothy plume-plucked lout!

Away with thee!

[Wetzelbill]

57. I just can't pass this up

:)

[RevolutionaryActs]

62. Thou jarring swag-bellied foot-licker!

[Hissyspit]

65. Prithee, you make of me a cuckold?

eh?

[RevolutionaryActs]

69. Thou cockered doghearted harpy!

[6000eliot]

68. Do thy worst, thou cur.

[RevolutionaryActs]

70. Thou jarring shard-borne maggot-pie!

[6000eliot]

84. Ouch!

[lildreamer316]

72. I am seriously hormonal. Go for it.

:evilgrin:

[RevolutionaryActs]

75. Thou mangled ill-breeding flirt-gill!

[lildreamer316]

76. .

Loveit! I'm such a flirt tonight.

[RevolutionaryActs]

81. Thou qualling fen-sucked mumble-news!

:P