Gather 'round kiddies for Matcom's JOKE O' The Day!

[matcom]

:hide:



Two friends were just about to tee off at the first hole of their local golf
course when a guy carrying a golf bag called out to them, "Do you mind if I
join you? My partner didn't turn up."

"Sure," they said, "You're welcome."

So they started play and enjoyed the game and the company of the newcomer.
Part way around the course, one of the friends asked the newcomer, "What do
you do for a living?"

"I'm a hit man," was the reply.
"You're joking!" was the response.

"No, really," he said, reaching into his golf bag and pulling out a
beautiful Martini sniper's rifle with a large telescopic sight. "Here are
my tools."

"That's a beautiful telescopic sight," said one of the guys. "Can I take a
look? I think I might be able to see my house from here."
So he picked up the rifle and looked through the sight in the direction of
his house.

"Yeah, I can see my house all right.
This sight is fantastic. I can see right in the window. Wow, I can even see
my wife in the bedroom! Ha ha, I can see she's naked!
Wait a minute, that's my neighbor in there with her. He's naked, too!!

He turned to the hit man, "How much do you charge for a hit?"
"I'll do a flat rate, for you, one thousand dollars every time I pull the
trigger."

"Can you do two for me now?"
"Sure, what do you want?"

"First, shoot my wife. She's always been mouthy, so shoot her in the mouth.
Then do the neighbor. He's a friend of mine, so just shoot his pecker off to
teach him a lesson."

The hit man took the rifle and took aim, standing perfectly still for a
few minutes.

"Are you going to do it or not?" said the guy impatiently.
"Just be patient," said the hit man calmly, "I think I can save you a grand
here.

:rofl:

[XemaSab]

1. IBTD!

:bounce:

[ZombieNixon]

2. YAY!

:bounce:

:rofl:

[ghostsofgiants]

3. Hahaha!

[plcdude]

4. not bad

have to tell my wife that one

[ThomCat]

5. That's funny.

:o

[Hugin]

6. Hmm... Maybe he should've had him shoot out the tires on the neighbor's...

car instead.

[Richardo]

7. But that would have cost $2000 *more*

:eyes:

[Hugin]

9. Sorry... I miss read the joke.

I'm naive.

[blondeatlast]

8. Hahahahahahaha! Love it. nt

[matcom]

10. *WHEW*

drove all the way home from work and it hasn't been locked :D

[matcom]

11. one more

:kick:

[chimpymustgo]

12. Good one.

:beer: