If I Were President...

[MrScorpio]

I would declare every humpday as "Sexual Wednesday" at all Hooters

Wings half price!

[SeattleGirl]

1. If I were President

I would declare all women sexual goddesses, and make it a crime to denigrate them, or look down on them for not being the "little woman". :evilgrin:


And, spankn's would be plentiful for whomever wanted them!! :spank: :spank: :spank: :evilgrin:

[MrScorpio]

2. If I Were President...

I would proclaim Roger Lodge a HERO OF THE MOTHERLAND

[SeattleGirl]

4. Does he like spankin's???

:evilgrin:

[MrScorpio]

6. I think his amazon wife handles that department

[SeattleGirl]

7. Hmmm....

I'm not sure I could stack up against her!









:hide:

[Kerrytravelers]

3. If I were president, I'd actually be elected by the people, not by Diebold

[MrScorpio]

5. If I Were President...

You'd get noogies for traffic violations, instead of traffic tickets

[Oeditpus Rex]

8. ...any athlete who used steroids would be

persona non grata. None of their records would be kept. I don't care if they hit 8 gajillion homers; it ain't goin' in the books.

It would be illegal to play baseball indoors or on anything but real grass.

The designated hitter would be history, but I'd bring back the spitball. (It never really left anyway.)

There'd be a Baseball Network with any game you wanted to watch, free, with built-in DVR so you could watch it anytime and as often as you wanted. And no commercials. Or announcers. Or talking CGI baseballs, or overbearing graphics of any kind.

There'd be a lot more day games, and I'd bring back doubleheaders. And every minor league team would have a great ballyard.

Oh... and lobbying would be a capital offense.

[SeattleGirl]

9. Ah, a man after my own baseball lovin' heart!

:loveya:

[Oeditpus Rex]

10. That ain't all I'm after

:evilgrin:

But we'll have to schedule any... uh, recreation around Dodgers games.

[SeattleGirl]

12. Oh?

You're on! :evilgrin:

[Oeditpus Rex]

13. What about the M's schedule?

Might be kinda tough to coordinate. :shrug:

[SeattleGirl]

14. No problem!

Mariners are coming to LA on June 20, 21, and 22nd. How 'bout that?

[Oeditpus Rex]

15. Forgot about that

I was pretty happy to learn that until I found out Jeff Nelson signed with St. Louis.

[SeattleGirl]

16. Oh, don't hold that against me, dude!

:cry:

[Oeditpus Rex]

17. I'm not

Actually, it's a good thing. If he stays with the Cardinals (he signed a minor-league contract), I can catch him in San Francisco. If he were still with Seattle, I'd have to go to an A's game. :puke:

[SeattleGirl]

18. No, you would go to a Mariners game, played at the Angel's

home field. Then you wouldn't have to :puke:

[Oeditpus Rex]

19. That's like a seven-hour drive

And driving in Ellay is :scared:

[SeattleGirl]

20. I have driven in LA

and lived to tell the tale!

[Oeditpus Rex]

21. So have I

It's not an experience I wish to repeat.

I'd rather go to an A's game. I figure there's a better chance of surviving a stabbing than a 14-car pile-up.

[SeattleGirl]

22. You know, I heard all kinds of stuff about LA drivers

But let me tell you, Seattle drivers are a LOT worse.

[Oeditpus Rex]

23. Yeah, yeah

Everybody says that about where they live. :P

I don't think there's any real difference in drivers. The difference is in the roads and the signs and the commute hours.

[SeattleGirl]

24. Yep.

Except, I actually felt safer on LA roads than I do on Seattle roads.

[Oeditpus Rex]

25. Any idea why?

I have a hypothesis: I think some people feel less intimidated in unfamiliar circumstances because they're concentrating on where they are and how to get where they want to go. That takes away some of the mental energy that might otherwise be used for anxiety, and it also gives one a sense of plausible deniability, i.e. "I'm not from here."



Well, it works for me. :silly:

[SeattleGirl]

26. Because drivers in LA don't feel like they have to

constantly change lanes!

[Oeditpus Rex]

27. Kinda hard to change lanes

in a parking lot.

[SeattleGirl]

28. I know, but that doesn't stop it from happening here in

SeattleLand

[Oeditpus Rex]

30. Your freeways come to full stops too?

Or is that a silly question?

[SeattleGirl]

31. It's a totally goofy questions

Which begs the answer, why do my friends call me "The Queen of the Backroads"?

[Oeditpus Rex]

32. I deserve such a title

Well, maybe not the "queen" part... unless it's a weekend.

If there's a way to get from point A to point Q without taking the busy byways, I know it. I. Freakin'. HATE. driving in heavy traffic, and I avoid it even if it means going several miles out of my way. It's worth the anxiety savings.

That's why I hate Ellay. They ain't got no un-busy byways.

[DarkmoonIkonoklast]

36. I've driven in both as well...

TTTT... and there is some truth in the notion that LA drivers are "on a wavelength"...
TTTTI noticed when I was driving down there, that the cause of almost all of those spectacular 150-car fender-benders you hear about was the guy from Not-L.A...
TTTTI found it almost surreal the way you'd see an entire roadway full of cars flash their brake lights in the same microsecond... except for the poor sod with out of state (or Northern Cal) tags...
TTTTSurreal, I tell you!

[DarkmoonIkonoklast]

34. At least he's not a DamnYankee!!!

:evilfrown:

[SeattleGirl]

35. Right on!

Damned Yankees!!!!!!!!!

[DarkmoonIkonoklast]

37. Hey! I thought you left!!!

:hug:
TTTTGlad you're still here!

[SeattleGirl]

38. Just trying to make my way out of the building!

:hug:

[DarkmoonIkonoklast]

39. Aww....

:( :hug:

[Oeditpus Rex]

42. Anymore

He was for five seasons, 1996-2000, and then part of 2003.

[DarkmoonIkonoklast]

33. Never mind President... Oeditpus Rex for COMMISSIONER!!!

:yourock:
TTTT
I'll drink :toast: to THAT!!!
TTTT
PLAY BALL!!! :bounce: :party: :beer: :popcorn:

[In_The_Wind]

11. Great! When are you running for office?

[SeattleGirl]

29. Soon as you sign up as Campaign Manager!

[In_The_Wind]

40. A highly skilled propagandist would make the best Campaign Manager.

[Guava Jelly]

41. Wyclef did a wonderful song witht that title..it gives me goosebumps

If I Was President Lyrics
by Wyclef Jean



If I was president,
I'd get elected on Friday, assasinated on Saturday,
and buried on Sunday.

If I was president...
If I was president

An old man told me, instead of spending billions on the war,
we can use some of that money, in the ghetto.
I know some so poor, they use the spring as the shower,
when screaming "fight the power".
That's when the vulture devoured


If I was president,
I'd get elected on Friday, assasinated on Saturday,
and buried on Sunday.

If I was president...
If I was president...
If I was president...
If I was president

But the radio won't play this.
They call this rebel music.
How can you refuse it, children of moses?


If I was president,
I'd get elected on Friday, assasinated on Saturday,
and buried on Sunday.

If I was president...
If i was president

Tell the children the truth, the truth.
Christopher Columbus didn't discover America.
Tell them the truth.
The truth
YEAH! Tell them about Marcus Garvey.
The truth YEAH! The truth.
Tell them about Martin Luther King.
Tell them the truth.
The Truth.
Tell them about JFK

If I was President

If I was president,
I'd get elected on Friday, assasinated on Saturday,
and buried on Sunday.

If I was president...
If I was president