There once was a man from Nantucket.

[Crazy Guggenheim]

Continue.

:popcorn: :popcorn: :popcorn:

[EstimatedProphet]

1. And he owned a car dealership

[BikeWriter]

2. in a bucket

[FuzzySlippers]

3. And they went wee wee wee all the way home.

[LouisianaLiberal]

4. There was a young belle from old Natchez

Whose clothes were all tatered with patches
When questions arose
On the state of her clothes
She drawled "When ah itches ah scratches"

[liberaltrucker]

5. Self Delete

[FunkyLeprechaun]

6. Named Joe

Who owned an airline with his brother Brian.

[Oeditpus Rex]

7. There was an old man from Stamboul

who soliloquized thus to his tool:
"You took all my wealth
"And you ruined my health
"And now you won't pee, you old fool!"

[liberaltrucker]

8. Who said

Damn, just fuck it.
The world is a mess,
so I won't digress.
I'll just roll up my joint
and suck it.

[BrotherBuzz]

9. A fellow from Marblehead Mass...

had testicles made out of brass
he could clang them together
and play 'Stormy Weather'
while lightning shot out of his ass

[mykpart]

10. A flea and a fly in a flue

Were imprisoned, so what could they do?
Said the fly, "let us flee!"
"Let us fly!" said the flea.
So they flew through a flaw in the flue.

[In_The_Wind]

11. Who soaked his jewels in a bucket.

[Random_Australian]

12. ... (5 of them)

Whose name was Donald Rumsfeld,
a high post he held,
But a poor man soon,
With a doonesbury cartoon,
and a laugh at the man Rumsfeld.

Donald Rumsfeld was a git,
he really drank quite a bit,
he groped at the ladies,
he fucked up the eighties,
Donald RUMsfeld is a complete tit.

When the mountains heave and sigh,
and the Cheney's lie,
we'll be there
we'll be fair
DU won't leave us maligned.

From this place it's plain to see
that b*stards want theocracy.
The bible ignored,
The river to ford
is to get them to let us be.

There was an old nasty called Bush,
Who stared at nice Condi's tush.
He won't get in trouble,
cos' Rush is his double,
and it's time to give him the push.

[NMMNG]

13. There once was a girl from Hoboken

Who claimed her cherry was broken
From riding a bike
On a cobblestone pike
But it really was broken from pokin'

[NMMNG]

14. There once was a girl from Hoboken

Who claimed her cherry was broken
From riding a bike
On a cobblestone pike
But it really was broken from pokin'

[marzipanni]

15. There once was a woman who begat

w\<wi amed Nat, Pat, and Tat.[br />It was fun in the breeding,
but hell in the feeding,
When she found she had no tit for Tat. -

(from a Playboy mag. my oldest brother found at the dump when I was a kid)


There once was a sculptor named Phidious,
Whose sculptures were positively hideous.
He carved aphrodite
Without any nightie,
and shocked the ultra-fastidious.

(from my dad)

[Guy Fawkes]

16. And he started a juice company...

[NNadir]

17. Who opposed Cape Wind, well..

...he fucked it.
The Oceans rose high,
Made Nantucket go "bye"
And took of his view of the sea and chucked it.