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rene moon Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Apr-21-06 04:57 PM
Original message
I just cried in the bathroom at work
How embarrasing!

My boss yelled at me about a project I've been working on in front of other colleagues.

I've never done that before---any advice?
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AirmensMom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Apr-21-06 04:58 PM
Response to Original message
1. Don't worry about it.
Bosses can be difficult (that's the nice way of putting it). :hug:
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Jigarotta Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Apr-21-06 04:58 PM
Response to Original message
2. is your boss normally a jerk? nt
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Ava Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Apr-21-06 04:59 PM
Response to Original message
3. I'm sorry!
have a hug! :pals:
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ET Awful Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Apr-21-06 04:59 PM
Response to Original message
4. Kick him in his jewels?
:P
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bigwillq Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Apr-21-06 04:59 PM
Response to Original message
5. Sometimes it's just a natural reaction.
I wouldn't worry too much about it.
:hug:
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redqueen Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Apr-21-06 04:59 PM
Response to Original message
6.  I hate bosses.
Bosses like that, I mean. Where do they get off? Power tripping like that.

Think nothing of it... happens to the best of us once in a while... nothing wrong with releasing stress through tears... better than dying early from holding it all in, I say.
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Debi Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Apr-21-06 05:00 PM
Response to Original message
7. Deep breaths and get back to it
Everyone breaks at some point (and in public as well)

If you dwell on it you'll feel worse.

Happened and now you're done.

but I'll give you this all the same :hug:

(My worst was when I broke down in tears at a school conference for my son - in front of teachers, principal, other parents - my husband was the sweetest).

hope the rest of the day goes better :hi:

Let me know if you need a joke..
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Jigarotta Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Apr-21-06 05:05 PM
Response to Original message
8. upsetting things sometimes make us cry.
Nothing to be embarassed about.
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Fleshdancer Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Apr-21-06 05:05 PM
Response to Original message
9. your boss was out of line
I don't know why he yelled at you and quite frankly it doesn't matter. Yelling (and especially in front of other colleagues) is unprofessional.

The only thing I can think of doing is to calmly request that if your boss has a problem, then s/he should address those concerns privately and in a professional manner.

I cry easily and it drives me nuts. People assume all tears mean sadness but I cry with any extreme feeling...whether it be happiness, anger, sadness, fear, etc. I don't know why, that's just how my body has always responded to overwhelming emotion. Over the years I have learned to never apologize for this. I explain my tears, but I never apologize for them.

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BikeWriter Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Apr-21-06 05:08 PM
Response to Reply #9
13. Unprofessional, yes, very much so. You give good advice.
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Debi Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Apr-21-06 05:07 PM
Response to Original message
10. Here - read this and try not to laugh (totally inappropriate content)
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ronnykmarshall Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Apr-21-06 05:21 PM
Response to Reply #10
22. “Oh. I see you two have already met.”
:rofl::rofl:

I bow to you Debi!! That is the funniest fucking thing I read all day.
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Debi Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Apr-21-06 05:24 PM
Response to Reply #22
26. It was posted here a while ago and I laughed so hard I cried
Since then I've tried to find a way to incorporate "Nobody blows on the bung. Nobody" into my daily conversations. Hasn't worked out to well :shrug:

Thanks for noticing :bounce:
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trof Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Apr-21-06 05:08 PM
Response to Original message
11. Never, EVER cry in the bathroom.
Just stand there and BAWL, right in front of your boss and everybody.
And I bet your co-workers will be on your side and he'll never do it again.
:-)
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rene moon Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Apr-21-06 05:08 PM
Response to Original message
12. Thanks for all the kind words
My boss isnt normally a jerk but he yelled about the lack of participants this year for a project our office is doing. We've had a good number in the past and this year has been considerbaly low. I dont know why, I've done the same outreach and then some as we have done in previous years and it didnt work out this time.

I've been stressed out about this for a while.

Sigh, I'll try to let it go but its my project and I feel like I blew it.
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BikeWriter Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Apr-21-06 05:12 PM
Response to Reply #12
15. Economic conditions beyond your control, Dear!
Few people have as much or more disposable income as we have in the past.
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Fleshdancer Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Apr-21-06 05:13 PM
Response to Reply #15
16. Exactly. n/t
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rene moon Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Apr-21-06 05:15 PM
Response to Reply #16
17. Thanks for your encouraging words!
I thank you both! :)
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BikeWriter Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Apr-21-06 05:17 PM
Response to Reply #17
18. You get hugs, too!
:hug:
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Fleshdancer Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Apr-21-06 05:22 PM
Response to Reply #17
25. on the bright side...
It's Friday! :hug:
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hedgehog Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Apr-21-06 05:19 PM
Response to Reply #15
21. I had a job that I would have walked out on if I had had any
disposable income!
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Fleshdancer Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Apr-21-06 05:21 PM
Response to Reply #12
23. based on this information, this is what I would do:
I would document everything I did and compare this with what I did in previous years. Put everything on paper and make it look nice. I would request a meeting with my boss (when I was comfortable to do so) and go over my actions with him. I would tell him that my outreach that proved successful in previous years are not working as well as expected this year and then I would request new ideas from him.

Once that discussion is over, I would then change the subject to his behavior. No one wants a failed project and yes, everything is very stressful right now, but if a level of professionalism and respect can not be maintained in the office, then success is only that much harder to obtain. His yelling was unprofessional. If he has a problem with you or your work, then he needs to talk to you calmly and privately.
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OhioBlue Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Apr-21-06 05:09 PM
Response to Original message
14. don't stress about it.
I've cried many times in the bathroom at work. It could be a boss being a jerk, just too much stress and feeling overwhelmed, getting bad news on a personal level...

It happens.

I'm sorry you had such a bad day.
:hug:

But, don't worry about your reaction. It was completely normal.
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ronnykmarshall Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Apr-21-06 05:17 PM
Response to Original message
19. Kill your boss
and burn the office down.

You'll feel better.
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hedgehog Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Apr-21-06 05:17 PM
Response to Original message
20. I've done that myself
I've also held it in and ended up with stress reactions. Some guys are just plain jerks. For the record, so are some women. Give them a little power and they have to use it to squash people. I don't really have any advice, just want you to know that you're not alone.
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LaurenG Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Apr-21-06 05:21 PM
Response to Original message
24. First your boss was way out of line
He has poor management skills. Secondly, he needs to get over himself, you obviously aren't screwing up on purpose, thirdly if he really cared he'd be helping you rather than calling you out in front of others. He had an asshole moment. Say something to him as that was inappropriate for him to do. Then let it go and don't take it on. I am so sorry I know how humiliating that can be. :hug:
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Metta Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Apr-21-06 07:46 PM
Response to Original message
27. This works for me.
Surround yourself with gentle, golden flame and breathe naturally until you settle down. Then, for awhile, however long you choose to define that, when you see/ meet with your boss, set up the image again. You'll be surprised at how it balances/ reworks the energy.

Too bad he/she's unprofessional.
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