My strength beyond being crushed.

[Just Me]

What compels you to discover or re-discover or FIND/DISCOVER a strength within you which compels you to show kindness, be generous, build in spite of a constant "feed" of negativity or confrontation with amoral challenges (eg PRICKS)?

My inspiration, that which compels me be to find strength when I feel tired and weak, includes the determination of other's WILL to surive, my son's unconditional love whether I am constructive or tried and tired and/or tearful, my friends' intentional listening and understanding, my animal's complete joy at my very presence, my work at touching others (human or otherwise), and this unshakeable will to survive even when I just don't want to do it, do life, anymore.

I AM EXHAUSTED BY CRUSHING EVENTS/EXPECTATIONS/EVENTS,...yet, "a strength" (I sometimes rather go away) still pushes me every single day.

What is the core or drive or desire pushing your strength?

[MaggieSwanson]

1. Love for (and of) my family.

And an overwhelming desire to do good.

I'm glad to hear from you tonight and hope everything went well!

[ZombieNixon]

2. I don't really know.

I think it's that thing my high school history teacher called "bloodymindedness." :shrug:

It's a good thing to have right about now.

[leftofthedial]

3. Maybe you are like me. If so, you are either:

1. a good person.

OR

2. a gullible fool.

Life is the process of continually trying to figure out which.

[idgiehkt]

4. the hope that I will burn off my negative karma and not have to return

that's about it, sad to say...

[u4ic]

5. Welcome to DU!

:toast:

[CaliforniaPeggy]

6. My dear idgiehkt.......

Welcome to DU! I hope you enjoy your stay in our crazy, addictive little village!

:hi:

[Just Me]

13. I never did get the immortality thingy.

Who in their sane/right mind would want to do this "life" FOREVER?

Oh,...well,...okay, excluding those who don't even have to pick up their own underwear. DUH!!!

[u4ic]

7. I have asked myself many times

and still haven't figured it out yet...:shrug:

Something in me just won't give up.

[Just Me]

10. I actually thought to myself, "I am worth more to my son dead than alive."

In material terms, it's true. SUCKS to have thoughts like that.

I am so stressed, right now: a faux "love" that matured :cry:, a job requiring three of me, so little relief in sight,...and I am just freakin' tired.

I did work with my son to complete, if not a totally functional, at least a masterpiece in our yard.

But, I am so tired.

I've been working 50+ work weeks, am a single mom, my son is being tested by his pubescent, um, SHIT, I can't even begin to talk about my ex-relationship, I got to see four hours of my closest sibling serving in Iraq (which is supposed to wonderful but, DAMN), and, I've actually left a message with my doctor to call me in a couple of days off work. I feel like I could sleep a whole week (but know I can't because the house would fall apart).

I want to run away,...for a little while. I can't

[u4ic]

11. Feel free to PM me

:hug:

I'm so sorry you're going through so much...I'm exhausted just thinking about what your life must be like. You definitely need to unload...

Please, JM, take care of yourself...and no, you're not worth more to your son dead than alive...materially, maybe, but nothing, NOTHING can replace the love of a mother. I lost mine, and though I didn't inherit anything, I would give up what little I have for her to be with me.

People are what matters...especially parents of younger children...love trumps above money (which is not to say money isn't important, especially when you're struggling).

btw...I was very ill for a number of years...lost everything...bedridden, could barely turn over for pain and nausea...needed help bathing, etc...thought I would end up in a wheelchair for the rest of my life...started to improve a bit..but still pretty non functional. This is the first time in 6 years that I've been able to have anything resembling a normal life (still quite a ways from working, however).

Basically, I've lost my 30's...my most productive years...to illness, to being non-functional, having to depend on others, etc...so while we seem to be at opposite ends, there is still much in common...if you need to talk, let me know. :hug:

[pitohui]

8. my inspiration is the beautiful creatures of the world

they are with us for only a short while longer, i feel i almost have a duty to enjoy them while they are here

[GoddessOfGuinness]

9. Something snapped inside me one day...

in the middle of an argument I was having with a colleague who was a mysoginistic prick. But instead of snapping in the negative sense of the word, it was more like a sudden release. It was as if we'd both been butting heads and getting nowhere for so long that the only logical course was to step aside and let him fall flat on his face, which he did.

[Just Me]

12. *LOL*

THAT actually made me feel better!!!! :rofl:

My ex-beau was supposedly a "mean ass lawyer",...the SOB can't face me,...is using one of his kids to do a vehicle exchange.

But, see,...that really REALLY pisses me off! Freakin' coward, using his kids like that! Meanwhile, although I NEVER invited him, my kid's ready to arm up with a baseball bat and kick this POS ass and I am saying, "NO, NO, NO!!!" I told him, if he wanted to be involved in the exchange, it had to be with a smile, a camera and a tape recorder.

After that, I thought, am I "using" my kid just like this NPD-AH?

Well, it would be except, his kids genuinely like me and I like them.

I do NOT want to allow such individuals to usurp my energy,...yet, they do, damn them!!!

[GoddessOfGuinness]

16. I've found that when I get caught up in it

the best thing to do is not fight it, but focus on myself instead of the person who's triggered my feelings. Once I acknowledge my anger, hurt, humiliation, and so on, and actually comfort myself, I feel so much better.

A writer whose works have helped me immensely, Pema Chödrön, calls this "dropping the story line".

The idea is similar to this: Imagine you've been in an accident with someone who, in your opinion at least, was driving like an idiot. You're hurt and bleeding.
Do you:
A) get pissed and scream at the other driver?
or
B) tend to your wounds?
Hopefully, you answered B.

Our emotions aren't as easily tended as our limbs. There's no bandage for a broken heart. All we can do is let the tears flow and be gentle and kind with our selves.

Surround yourself with those who are supportive, and people who just make you feel good. Activities like yard work and floor scrubbing are a great release for angry energy. And taking the time to give to those you love and those who are less fortunate helps put things back into a brighter perspective.

I wish I could give you a real one of these right now; but I hope you sense the energy behind the smiley is genuine! :hug:

[Just Me]

14. LMAO!!!! My cat is "snoring",...LOUDLY!!!

ya' see how stupid shit like that keeps me,..."alive". :rofl:

[Random_Australian]

15. Something once cost me more than anything else ever could. I can't

be stopped now.