Check out the red stickies above.

[Kerrytravelers]

Stephanie, I'm sorry. I love you forever. Your Daniel
Daniel, You had your chance. I have another man now. Steph and a link to http://www.match.com/


Holy shit. Or am I total doofus falling for a joke?

[ZombieNixon]

1. I don't know, but I'm

nosy curious. :D

[Kerrytravelers]

2. I'm hella cuious... no, I'm fuckin' NOSY!

It's like a little DU soap opera! :woohoo:

[ZombieNixon]

5. I don't care if it's fake, I want to know the rest of the story.

:o

[Mutley]

6. We can always make it up ourselves.

:D

[ZombieNixon]

10. Ooh, yes, let's!

:D

[Mutley]

11. So, one day Daniel was secretly listening to Rush Limbaugh.

Your turn.

[ZombieNixon]

13. Of course, he could only keep it secret from Stephanie by wearing his

headphones. Today, however, he was in such a mood that Rush made more sense than usual. Liberals were ruining this country. They drank blood and ate aborted fetuses for breakfast. They had freed Willie Horton, nailed Donna Rice, blew up the World Trade Center, and now they were trying to bring down the greatest president the US of A had ever seen.
"Yeah, go Rush! Nail the bastards!" Daniel yelled in his fervor. He heard a voice from behind his shoulder. His heart stopped cold.

:D

[Mutley]

15. He turned slowly and standing behind him with her jaw on the floor was

Steph. His mouth opened and closed in a desperate attempt to come up with some excuse -- any excuse, but nothing came.

[Sugar Smack]

17. Stop it or I'm gonna

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: my ass off!

[ZombieNixon]

20. "I heard that, Daniel," she said.

"You said a naughty word. You know the Bible forbids us from saying things like that. It's God's law. Just like how I have to stay pregnant with your child even though my cocaine habit will probably give it some severe birth defect and make its life a living hell for the five minutes its heart still beats after emerging from my lady business."

:hide:

[Kerrytravelers]

22. Oh Stephanie, I didn't realize... oh, however will I make life easier for

you? Please, sit down, prop up your feet and relax. I'll do all the chores and I'll even let you hold onto the remote control.

(Mine is a fantasy... like Passions!)

[ZombieNixon]

29. "I mean—" he said, suddenly realizing what had accidentally escaped his

mouth. "Shut up and get me a beer, woman!"

[Mutley]

23. "But I could never allow you to get rid of my child, Stephanie!

"You know that. Carry it to term, then give it to me. After that I'll keep you supplied in coke until your brain dribbles from your nose."

[ZombieNixon]

25. "No, Daniel, I can't let you do that!" she cried.

"This is God's child and will let no other raise him."
"Holy Mother of God!" Daniel yelled. This was absurd. It was his baby.
Stephanie simply said "Mm-hmm."
"Jesus Christ, Stephanie!"
"That's a great name, Daniel!"

[Kerrytravelers]

28. But it was HIS baby!

OMG! There's a thread in the Choice forum on this very topic! Roe v. Wade for men!

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=217x3924

After you read the whole thing, you'll want to beat yourself in the head, too!

[Mutley]

30. "What are you talking about, 'that's a great name'?

Do you think I'm suggesting we name the baby Jesus Christ? Are you high right now?"
Tears began to well in Stephanie's eyes. "Daniel, why are you acting like this?"
Daniel paced back and forth trying to decide exactly how much to tell her.
"I'm sleeping with your sister. And your cousin."

[ZombieNixon]

32. "Which cousin?" said Stephanie.

"Umm..." Daniel paused, as here was a dilemma. He had been sleeping with Violet, well known as the campus slut in her in college days...and girls had cooties, anyway. He randomly picked a name out of the members of Stephanie's family he had met. "Jim-Bob," he said.

[Mutley]

34. "What?! You're gay? But, but, you'll go to hell for that, Daniel!"

"How can you do this to me, Daniel? How can you do this to our son?" Stephanie ran from the room weeping and Daniel threw his drink against the wall.

[ZombieNixon]

35. That was that. Oh, well, he always had the Jack and Coke.

But still...she was the only woman who would have him. Well, besides her cousin Violet. And Violet's mother. And Jim-Bob. No, wait, not Jim-Bob. Although there was that one time at the family reunion—he stopped himself. Stephanie was gone. And there was nothing he could do about it...except...

[Mutley]

39. He suddenly remembered he still had one last DU stickie to

post on the Big Board. It was his last chance. Surely if he asked her forgiveness in front of the whole internets she would never refuse him.

[ZombieNixon]

40. He had paid $10 for this sticky.

He had originally intended to write something like "Bush roolz, u h8 Amerka!" but he thought this was more important. He screwed up his concentration to type.

Stephanie
I'm sorry
I love you
forever

your Daniel

He pressed "Submit." Hopefully she would see it.

[Mutley]

41. A grueling ten minutes went by while he chewed his fingernails down

to nothing. Then, finally, another red stickie appeared.

Daniel
You had your
chance.
I have
another man
now. Steph

And it was linked to match.com. He was shocked. His breath rushed out all at once before he even realized he'd been holding it. What would he do now?

[ZombieNixon]

42. Shakily, he move up in the screen and...

clicked the link.

[Mutley]

43. Match.com.

That fucking bitch!

[Ava]

31. you are so going to hell!

:spray:

[Kerrytravelers]

33. At least we'll all be amongst friends!

See you all there! :evilgrin:

[Ava]

36. nope, not me!

i'm an angel! O8)

:rofl:

[Mutley]

3. Wow, I wonder if that's real.

:o

[Ava]

4. i think it's a joke

regardless it's hillarious! :rofl:

[Innoma]

7. Oooh, Curious! Tell! Tell!

But why does the one between 'em look like the top of a baby bottle in glass?

Curiouser and curiouser! :P

[Kerrytravelers]

12. Ohhh... maybe there's a baby involved.

This is getting even better by the moment!

[Innoma]

16. OK, I've put on the Secret Decoder Ring...

...and figured out the not-so-secret secret message between the messages. It goes like so:

Danny posts a lovelorn sticky to Stephy, who replies with the cryptic baby bottle sticky, whose message implies "you coulda been my baby, but you blew it, pal!". But, fearing that the message might be a tad too obscure, Stephy decides to spelll it out in black and white (or red, as the case may be), and even goes so far as to underline it, thus insuring the message strikes close to home.

And that, my friends, is another DU Mystery solved.

[Sugar Smack]

21. There's a cone of peach ice cream involved and a bet!

:rofl:

[skygazer]

8. Reminds me of some graffiti from my youth

Some 35 years ago, there was a railroad bridge in my hometown and someone wrote in huge letters with spray paint, "MARY SHIMINSKI, I LOVE YOU!" It was there for years and then they repainted the bridge.

About ten years later, the message appeared - "MARY SHIMINSKI, I STILL LOVE YOU!"

It was very cute.

[crispini]

9. Bwahahahahahaha!

That's hysterical. I'm sure it's a joke, but LOL!

[Book Lover]

14. I don't know, but I was going to start a thread about it too

I say it's just an ad for match.com, but I'd love to know for sure!

[Deja Q]

18. The names do sound familiar.

[mike_c]

19. LOL-- I came to the Lounge SPECIFICALLY because...

...I knew there would be a thread about Daniel and Stephanie in here! And if there wasn't, I would have started one.

[DS1]

24. People actually read those?

Wow, I'm a pictures-only type

[ZombieNixon]

26. Well, that's only because you can't read.

:P :silly:

[Kerrytravelers]

27. Well, I mean, it's not exactly "War and Peace" reading here!

:rofl:

[Innoma]

37. Daniel, Stephanie, and the Nefarious Subject A - A Love Story

This is a true story - the names have been changed to protect the innocent and indicted...

Daniel is really Jim - a pleasant, wordy man well known for his ability tell a tall tale he sticks resolutely to under the most trying of circumstances. Due to the understandable stress that comes from tale spinning, Jim finds himself suddenly struck with Multiple Personality Stickies (MPS), and channels said stress onto a self-created oasis of feminine charm and guile named Stephanie, to which he for pines pleadingly under the guise of Daniel. Unfortunately, MPS, when untreated, has a tendency to branch off into sub-realities, and thus is born Ollie - a crusty, acerbic, reality-based nemesis who exists solely to taunt the mythical and aforementioned Daniel with visual imagery, the gist of which is to brand Daniel a 'baby' that really needs to get a grip. Under increasing mental pressure, Jim fissions off yet another Sticky Personality - this time a manifestation of the idealized Stephanie - only to find himself thwarted by himself when his creation turns against him and proclaims undying fealty to another man (heretofore and henceforward known as 'Subject A'). The mysterious Subject A, however, is uncommunicative and currently engaged in a 15-hour musical revue off Broadway, but when pressed by intrepid reporters to confirm whether or not he is, in fact, the object of Stephanie's undying love, will only reply with a smirky, "nice try." Meanwhile, the community at large has erupted into a frenzy of rash speculation about the motives of the principals involved and the legal status of the nefarious Subject A.

[Fleshdancer]

38. what a GREAT idea!!!

We need to come up with a whole DU soap opera story for the next fundraiser/sticky drive. :bounce:

[Kerrytravelers]

44. THERE YOU GO!

That's great!

[Sugar Smack]

45. *snort*

:spray: :patriot: :popcorn: