Are you a toucher? If not, do you detest when other people are?

[LaraMN]

I know some people hate to be touched. I try to avoid doing so with people who don't seem to like it, but I'm really touchy-feely, in a physical sense. I kiss, hug, and pat everyone that seems to happily reciprocate. I just like human contact and showing affection for people that I care about. How 'bout you?

[Phillycat]

1. I love to be physically affectionate with my friends and family BUT

I cannot stand it when strangers or people I don't know well touch me. I have prominent tattoos on my back and my arm, and people continually touch them in public. OMG I fucking hate that!!

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

5. I hate it when strangers think that just because my ears are filled

with metal, they can grab them.

"No, you fucking idiot stranger! Not only is it pretty rude for strangers (especially adults) to grab my ears, I don't know where your fucking grubby hands have been!"

Gah! Or the question, "does that go all the way through?" No, it just looks like it does due to my psychic powers. "Are those tattoos real?" No, they're very realistic permanent rub-ons.

[GOPisEvil]

16. I agree wholeheartedly with your 1st sentence.

[NewWaveChick1981]

2. I'm a very warm person, and I hug and touch my family all the time.

I also hug close friends and pat them on the back when the occasion calls for it. I have also hugged coworkers that needed a hug, but usually when I know them pretty well. I don't touch strangers or acquaintances----first of all, it's a violation of their personal space, and second, I would not impose that on someone who doesn't like being touched. If I know them well enough, then I can show them affection like hugs.

[unpossibles]

3. depends on the person

I am a very touchy person, but only with people who deserve it (ha!)

[Oeditpus Rex]

4. Not in the sense of the 'attention touch'

i.e. that sort of person who constantly touches your arm as they tell a story or something. I don't do that and I don't like it.

But when I meet a friend, my impulse is to hug. I like to sit close to people I like, and while doing so I may lay my head on their shoulder. And I like to hold hands with girlfriends or have an arm around them... or a leg draped over them if we're lazin' on the sofa or something.

I'm also very much the nuzzler.

[Rabrrrrrr]

6. No, not a toucher. I especially hate the little psuedo-kisses

that people expect when meeting.

I don't mind hugging people I like; or shaking stranger's hands; and I love physical contact with my honey bunch.

But otherwise, no, I don't like people touching me. Especially people I don't know (like salesmen: dude, putting your hand on my shoulder isn't "friendly", it's fucking INVASIVE), but even with my good friends, I'm not much of a toucher.

And Jesus Christ people, just because I don't want to hold your baby doesn't mean I'm an evil fuckbag. It only means that I don't want to hold your baby.

Same with touching your pets - no, I don't feel like I should pet your dog.

[gmoney]

7. Kiss, hug and pat, eh?

Sounds heavenly. Where do I sign up?

[Shine]

8. I'm definitely affectionate with my friends and family.

and I appreciate when they are that way with me, too.

:hi:

[atomic-fly]

9. I will backslap you if touch me from behind...

I hate when strangers touch me or people at work.
I have space issues.

[dpbrown]

10. I'm a hugger

Can't help it.


:hug:

[billyskank]

11. I am a huggy kind of person

but generally the only people I get to hug are close guy friends.

[Deja Q]

12. I want to be touched but do not like touchers.

[wildhorses]

13. so if I give you a hug, does that mean you

hate me?:hug::cry::evilgrin:

[Deja Q]

14. That's virtual. Here's why I fear touchers:

I'd take the touching too seriously.

I've been untouched for so long...

[wildhorses]

15. ....if I touched you IRL that would mean

I have VERY long arms:silly:

[Deja Q]

19. Awww. You're sweet!

:hug:

[RedCappedBandit]

17. Depends on who you are

I hate it when people who are just friends touch me tbh, I don't know why.
I do love giving hugs to certain people though!! :shrug:

[CanuckAmok]

18. I don't like it. I want to punch anyone who touches me, but I....

...hate hipocricy even more than being touched, so I leave them alone.

[Zookeeper]

20. Yes, I am.

But, I try not to invade people's space if they seem closed, which is frequently the case here in predominately German-Scandinavian Minnesota.

I'm with you, Lara, on the kissing, hugging, patting and "showing affection for people that I care about." And if I'm having a nice conversation or interaction with a stranger or aquaintance, I'm likely to shake hands or give them a pat on the arm.

I don't mean this in a critical way, but I can't figure out why anyone wouldn't want to be touched by a loved one or friend.

:shrug:

[hippywife]

21. I'm kinda weird this way.

I work with the elderly. I touch and hug them all the time. I do hug good friends but I hate it when coworkers, even ones I know well, invade my space in any way.

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

22. Not a toucher.

I don't "detest" being touched, but I like a fair amount of personal space and would prefer not to be pawed by strangers, and even with good friends I'm not what you'd call huggy. With people I don't know well handshakes are fine; being tapped on the shoulder or patted on the arm to get attention is fine; but I get uncomfortable if someone who isn't a good friend puts their hand on me as a gesture of intimacy -- especially in a non-social context, like when some asshat is trying to sell me something. That bugs the hell out of me.

[tjwmason]

23. I have personal space

and only people whom I know well are allowed to enter it.

People who enter that space without tacit permission are, quite frankly, rude.

If I've just met a person, I'm bound to be less affectionate than my sisters with whom I've been raised.

[politicat]

24. Polite handshake girl here.

I don't know where you've been, and I don't know what you've been touching. If I wanted to have your boobies pressed up against mine, I'd ask. There are people I touch and people I don't want to touch. The former are people I've known for a long, long time and like (family is not defaulted into this category, as it happens. I don't like most of my family, and in their cases, I DO know where they've been and I'm not touching that!!)

Besides, I'm bisexual. If I touch other girls (even as friends), they either 1) get weirded out because they think I'm making a pass (not); 2) get insulted because I'm not making a pass; or 3) get excited that I'm making a pass when I'm not. Argh. I have better things to do with my time than deal with other people's difficulties with their sexuality.

And I don't touch guys because most of them don't get it, either.

[pitohui]

25. i hate it, it's creepy

i really don't see why all that touchy-poo is necessary unless we're planning to have sex

maybe i was a guy in my last life, i dunno, but even guys now think you are supposed to hug when you get together

[bicentennial_baby]

26. delete, dupe...

:D

[bicentennial_baby]

27. HATE it...

unless it's someone I'm really close to, DON't f'n touch me people!!! EWWWW! :puke:

unless i'm in France, then it's all different.... :D

[YellowRubberDuckie]

28. I'm a toucher if I'm with friends.

If I'm not, I have a personal space, and it freaks me out if it's invaded. One day my cubie mate at the time, Ryan, rolled over to take the rest of the reese's pieces I had offered him about ten minutes before, and I looked at him like "dude, get away from me!" He was a little startled, and wheeled away in his chair. It wasn't like I hadn't hugged the guy before, but at that time, I just flipped. Totally involuntary action. Normally, I'm very affectionate with the people I love. Sometimes I just get freaked. :shrug:
Duckie

[MsKandice01]

29. I'm very touchy-feely with my husband and kid BUT..

I grew up in a family of non-touchers so when friends or family members hug me it feels extremely awkward. It catches me off guard.

[Blue-Jay]

30. I don't touch with you!

:D

[Floogeldy]

33. *snicker*

;)

[Iniquitous Bunny]

31. Not with most people.

If friends give me hugs, that's fine, but I usually don't initiate them first. However, with my children, I'm very huggy and with my SO, I'm huggy, grabby, kissy a lot.

If I don't know you, don't touch me though. Yuck!

[PassingFair]

32. I'm in sales and I touch people who seem to need assurance

that I am telling the truth.

It's weird, but I can tell when a simple touch
on the arm, usually the forearm, but sometimes
the shoulder, is called for.

I also shake hands after a deal has been struck.

Other than that, I don't usually touch.

[Floogeldy]

34. If I see a great looking chick walking down the street . . .

. . . I walk up to her and say something like, "Connie!" and give her a big hug. Then, I slip my hands down to her waist, look her over from toe to head and say, "Wow, you look great!" Finally, I move in for the deep French kiss.

I can't wait to do it again but I gotta save up some bail money, first.

;)

[Zookeeper]

37. .....

:spank:

[Floogeldy]

58. Oh, yea. Just like that.

Don't stop. MMMmmmm. Yes!

:evilgrin:

[Zookeeper]

62. You are SO bad!

:bounce:

[libnnc]

35. I don't like being touched by men I don't know well

I don't have a problem with women touching me at all. Love that...:evilgrin: I guess it's a trust thing. I work at a bar (bar back). When I wash glasses, I lean on the bar with one hand (it's easier on my back). I often have men try to touch that hand. Creeps me out.

I have no problem with my male co-workers. I know them well and we often hug at work. I think of them as brother/best friend types. I just don't like male customers trying to get too friendly.

[WritingIsMyReligion]

36. I don't mind it with friends and family.

I don't really like to be the initiator, however.

I don't care much what other people do, unless I'm in my foul curmudgeon mood and then, dangit, don't you dare touch one another! :evilgrin:

I do dislike it when people feel the need to make-out in full view of the public. If they've managed to make it to a corner or something, whatever. But people who just sit there feeling one another up at the dinner table in a restaurant, on the middle of the green, etc. irritate me. It isn't that I find their behavior "disugusting" as much as it embarrasses me.

:)

[sendero]

38. Not so much...

.. with an intimate partner, I'm 1000%, but I don't like touching anyone else.

I've tried to figure out why that is, to no avial. I like people, I just don't like them in my personal space :)

[Fox Mulder]

39. I don't like being touched.

Especially by strangers. :grr:

[Mayberry Machiavelli]

40. Yes. I work in a job where I take care of others, often in a situation

where they are full of tension and anxiety over what is going to happen to them. As I speak to them, I will sometimes lightly touch a shoulder or arm/hand essentially as an act of reassurance. I certainly try not to be oppressive or inappropriate with it.

I think it is appreciated by most, but I don't know.

[u4ic]

41. It really depends

At heart I am, but I give people their space initially. I'm very aware of those that need their space; I used to be one.

I give a lot of hugs.

Some people I don't mind touching me - who, I can't say; some I just have more of an affinity with, even if I've only just met them. Conversely, there are people I've known for years that I don't touch, nor do they touch me. (esp my family, a very non huggy bunch)

With an S.O., I'm more of a groper. :7

[liontamer]

42. i think there should be more touch in our society

lack of touch isn't healthy. But since people do have their boundaries, I work to respect them. Some of my friends are touchy feely some aren't and that's that.

on edit:
I'm not cool with random stranger touching. Touch shows affection and trust and strangers shouldn't even go there.

[txwhitedove]

43. Toucher, hugger, super snuggler with kids, grandkids, and friends...

Have had sad experience with the "churchy-huggers" being the most false.

[CaliforniaPeggy]

44. My dear Lara......

I, too, am a toucher!

I love hugs! Even the first time I meet someone, I like to hug them!

Kissing does take me longer, however........

I do tend to read the body language of those I'm just meeting......

If they seem reserved, then I just hold out my hand........

That's how I am! :hug:

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

52. I've hugged DUers the first time I've met them.

At my Soulforce training, we had a cuddle party on day 2. We bonded fast. I already miss a bunch of the people I met.

[XemaSab]

45. it's funny you should mention this

twice in the last 24 hours I have had someone just start touching me. It really bugs me.

[Nicole]

46. I'm a toucher with family

and friends. I loved to be touched by them as well.

I HATE for strangers to touch me, especially the people who get too close while waiting in lines.

[leftofthedial]

47. I'm a toucher

I like to lick people

it seems to annoy some folks

[last_texas_dem]

48. I'm not, but I don't mind it from others

Other than with close friends and family, I'm not a toucher myself. I usually need to feel like I can really trust someone before I'm very "touch"-y. And often the way I am with even close friends/family has to do with the way they are. If the other person is, like me, not a very touch-y person, during the course of our becoming friends there was never a point where one of us started being that way towards the other, and thus we remain that way. Thus I'm touchier with some friends who aren't that way than others who I'm actually much closer friends with. I guess I adapt to how I think the other person is.

But I generally don't mind and often like it if someone I'm not that close to is touch-y. (Especially if they're a member of the opposite sex... which probably makes me sound like a pig, but I'm really not! I'm mostly thinking of some of my friends' attractive ex-girlfriends who used to think they always needed to hug me in greeting even though we really weren't that close.) Probably the only time I don't like the touchiness is if I'm being touched on the face in a non-intimate manner (you know, someone poking you in the nose for the fun of it or something) or being touched by someone in a fake friendly but actually borderline hostile manner. (High school seemed to be a popular place for that.) I guess not liking that kind of touching is a pretty obvious way to feel, though!

[Spider Jerusalem]

49. No...I hate it.

I dislike violations of my personal space. And I'm overly sensitive to touch; being touched lightly can produce a sensation not too different from a mild electric shock. (One of the many differences in sensory perception that result from the neurological difference of Asperger's Syndrome.)

[obxhead]

50. as a server it is part of the job description.

[JackDragna]

51. It drives me crazy when strangers touch me.

People have no etiquette anymore. In particular, I find since I'm a tall person, people somehow like to touch me, as if I'm some circus oddity.

[seaglass]

53. I hate it when people touch my head, I feel like ripping their arms

off - I can't even stand for my husband to touch my head.

Any other touching is OK.

[Tracer]

54. What is it with you "huggers"?!

Can't you read a social situation and divine that someone you have just been introduced to doesn't want to be hugged by you?

Don't you have any sense of propriety? Wouldn't a handshake do? Or just a pleasant word or two?

The "hug" epidemic has gotten so bad that I tend to stand more than several feet away from people, to try and fend off their lurch forward for the hello/goodbye "hug".

I was stunned by my first introduction to my present doctor who greeted me with -- dammit -- a hug. He's a wonderful guy who has an extremely difficult job (cancer patients), and I know his heart is in the right place --- but I'd like to get him to STOP hugging me!

[LaraMN]

55. Hey,

:hug:

















:rofl:

[RandomKoolzip]

56. No, I don't touch and I don't like to BE touched.

I don't hug anyone besides my veryvery best friends and my wife and mother.

HOWEVER, I will french-kiss whoialhedges.

[deutsey]

57. What's so wrong with being a teacher?

Oh. Never mind.

[Jamastiene]

59. I'm guessing you are not a rock star, but

:yourock: !!!!!!

I wanna meet you. If more people would care for each other and show genuine affection toward each other like you describe, loneliness could all be be eliminated. I wish there were more people like you. :hug:

[leeroysphitz]

60. I definitely need my own non-invaded space...

There is a guy at work. A nice guy, actually, but he can't talk to you without touching you. It's off putting (and not in some sort of homophobic way). I'm just not a big fan of proximity without invitation.

I don't dislike the people I avoid touching if that makes any sense.

[Skittles]

61. I cannot stand touchy-feely folk

sorry but it is just so damn intrusive

[calico1]

63. No. I do hug and kiss my relatives and certain

people I am close to on occasion. For example if I haven't seen them in a while. But constant touchy feely huggy...NNNOOOO! And Yes, I absolutely hate it when people invade my space and hug, touch or kiss me and I am not expecting it. Especially people I don't even know that well. What is up with that? I hate that.

[Gormy Cuss]

64. Please let this thread die. There's a copycat idea stuck in my head

and it would be in poor taste to post it but the temptation is SO great.

[RetroLounge]

65. Definitely a toucher, hugger, etc.

I have no personal space. Come closer. closer. there, isn't that better.

of course, I also do not have a filter on my mouth or an inner monologue, which gets me in all kinds of trouble.

:hug:

RL