Men's drink rules

[Taverner]

Men may only order brown drinks. Beer, whiskey, scotch, etc. He might be able to get away with a clear drink (e.g. gin, vodka etc) but only if he has the presence to pull it off.

Men are allowed a "girly" drink if they are on a date, with their gf or wife PROVIDED that she drinks one too. Also the man is limited only to what she is drinking. Example, if she orders a margarita, he may order one - but it must be of the same kind.

Men are allowed a "girly" drink based on atmophere ONLY if the other male in company orders one as well. Example: you are at a tiki bar and the other guy you are with orders a mai tai. Once again, you are only limited to the SAME EXACT drink he orders. Also, he may not discuss the drink, ever, outside of the establishment.

Men are allowed "girly" drinks en masse if he is on vacation in a tropical locale. Example, in Cancun he can always order a Margarita. In Hawaii he can always order a Mai Tai. NOTE, he may not order a Mai Tai in Cancun nor a Margarita in Hawaii.

Men may never, ever, order a Cosmopolitan, an Appletini, a Grasshopper or any other specialty girly drink.

Straight Tequila is always OK, but the man must realize that he is putting his life in his own hands here. Tequila has led many men into situations requiring a lawyer, guns, non-phillips screwdrivers and floor wax.

[SlavesandBulldozers]

1. i think you pretty much have the rules pinned down.

really though, girly drinks should be last resorts, i think. Ya know, end of the world. . . all the bourbon's been looted by mutant zombies and all that's left is Blueberry Stoli and mixers. . . ok.

and i think the U.S. is starting to get some decent Tequilas imported and readily available. So the likelihood of strangling your closest friends has been somewhat minimized.

[ChickMagic]

2. Man law?

My hubby is a girl drink drunk. :)
I loved that Kids in the Hall sketch.

[Taverner]

3. Yup. Man Law

And even so, this is a fairly liberal reading of that law. See reply #1

[ChickMagic]

11. Ah so, sensei!

I hate girl drinks. And I'm a girl.

[deucemagnet]

18. Ask, and youtube will provide...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KZK6RISIuPU&search=girl%20drink%20drunk%20kids%20in%20the%20hall :)

[ChickMagic]

30. You are so awesome!

Thanks - I haven't seen that in years!
:yourock:

Oh, and a somewhat belated welcome to DU!

[Initech]

4. I pretty much follow only one rule when drinking:

If it's brown, drink it down.

If it's black, send it back. (note: exception here only applies to Guinness related products and Coke mixed with Jack Daniels)

[wildhorses]

5. with all that being said...is it ok for girls to drink tequila?

please. say. yes.

[ChickMagic]

8. It had better be

I like shots. In Vegas, I had been drinking house tequila shots
and was doing okay. The bartender took a liking to me and pulled
out a tequila from a black velvet bag. He gave me a freebie shot
and man, oh man, I hit a wall. I had to be practically carried
back to the hotel where I promptly puked and passed out.
2 hours later, I woke up hubby and said, "Steak and eggs,
$2.99 - we're out of here!"

Is that weird for a girl?

[HiFructosePronSyrup]

10. Tequila's a sipping liquor.

It's meant to be enjoyed slowly. If you shoot it you don't get to savor it and, as you apparently found out, you're just asking for trouble.

[ChickMagic]

13. I did not know that.

I shall take that under advisement with my holy agave.

[wildhorses]

12. I promptly puked and passed out.

:spray:



not if you're a cowgirl its not

[ChickMagic]

15. Yee haw!

9th generation Texan - what can I say? I lack couth.

[Taverner]

16. Ahhh but Texans HAVE couth

They just choose when to use it and when not to ;)

No sunufabitch's gonna tell THEM when to have couth or tooth!

[ChickMagic]

25. You ol' sidewinder!

I got tooth. Storebought, but tooth nonetheless.
And I reek, I tell you, REEK, of couth.

[Taverner]

9. I don't know my woman's law - sorry

From a guy's perspective, sure - why not?

I mean you do know the woman that can throw a football and quote Monty Python is the holy grail, so why not?

[HiFructosePronSyrup]

6. I disapprove of nearly all mixed drinks.

There's a reason straight liquor doesn't go down easy.

Although I do occasionally enjoy a nice margarita. If it's nice and salty and it's quality tequila.

[GumboYaYa]

7. One Big Caveat......

All of the aforementioned rules may be disposed of if the "It's the only liquor I had" exception applies.

[querelle]

14. Red Wine?

I'm a guy and drink only red wine (okay, neat scotch is nice in winter when I need something to quickly warm my innards). Is red wine allowed? Ever? Please?

Q

[Taverner]

17. Hmmmm wine is a tough one

I think the rule goes thusly...

When at dinner with others drinking wine it is *OK*, but if drinking by oneself it's a no-no.

But no man shall EVER drink White Zinfandel...

[HiFructosePronSyrup]

19. Baloney. Real men drink wine like they drink their orange juice.

Straight out of the bottle and/or carton.

[swimboy]

22. Welcome to DU, querelle!

:hi:

About the wine? Don't sweat it. Drink what you like and what likes you. Some of us were born to break rules. And look at what the Man Law says: You may order any drink that another man in your company orders. BE THAT MAN!

[Taverner]

23. Just not White Zinfandel

Red Zin, sure. But we all know the only person who drinks White Zinfandel is the girl who is looking for a quickie ;)

[swimboy]

24. I'll grant you that and promise never to drink white zinfandel.

The only exception should be for an underage guy when White Zin is all his older sister has that he can get his hands on.

[Taverner]

27. Well if you're under 21 none of the rules apply

You drink what you can get ahold of. And if you're like me and all you can get is the Raspberry Schnapps, enjoy that porcelain altar!

[swimboy]

32. for me it was Red Grape Malt Duck

:scared:

[MadHound]

20. Geez, you are way too afraid of tequila

It is about the only hard liquor I drink straight. Can't stand whiskey, scotch, etc. Give me cacti juice any day. Oh, and it's clear, at least the blancos are.

Perhaps you should put the Cuervo down and try some real tequila, sipping tequila. Patron, Chinaco, Herradura, these are but a few of the tasty tequila treats one should sip, not shoot. And screw the training wheels, salt and lime are used to cover up the horrible taste of Cuervo and such ilk. For real pleasure, try anejos and respados, tequilas that have been aged in oak barrels, similar to good scotch. And always, always get tequilas that are 100% blue agave. Anything else is crap.

[Taverner]

21. Oh I love real tequila

Cazadores is my fave Reposado
Chinaco is my favorite Anejo
and Herradura is my favorite Silver

But despite this, I've seen Tequila lead many a man down the path to darkness..

[MadHound]

26. Then you and I have got to get together sometime and

Drink good tequila. Too few people, especially north of Texas really appreciate, or even aware of good tequila.

If you ever want to die and go to tequila heaven, head down to Austin Texas and find the Century Liquor Store. They have a set of shelves sixty feet long, three shelves high filled with nothing but tequilas of all sorts, and not a Cuervo in the lot. I've got friends in Austin and always break the budget when I go down there.

And I don't know about leading men to darkness. To worship the porcelein god for sure, and some folks get violent on the stuff. But I think they would get violent no matter what they drank. Me, I've given up drinking to excess anymore. Instead, pour a couple of fingers once in awhile just to mellow out.

:toast: To Fine Tequila!

[querelle]

31. Amen.......

The last time I drank tequila was at a Police concert in the early 80's. Don't remember much about that night, but one of my friends took many pictures and regaled me with stories of my behavior the next day. (Thanx so much Mary Beth).

NEVER AGAIN!

Q

[Cannikin]

28. I gotta stay out of those gay bars. They dont stick to the rules!

[outofbounds]

29. Jagermiester

Must be consumed in shot form or the good ol' JagerBomb. Then a few (6 pack) of beer must be consumed to clear the pallet shall we say. Then it is acceptable to finnish the afternoon with Shots of Jager. Just to make sure that what you thought you tasted, you tasted. At this point you free to drink how ever you wish till the bar closes or you do.

If you feel the need for an umbrella that is totally acceptable in a JagerBomb, just don't poke your eye out kid-o.

Bottoms Up!:toast: