Big Move?

[rbnyc]

I probably shouldn't even be calling attention to this, but it's pretty pronounced in my mind already, so here I am.

Many of you know that I was in a major car accident 3 years ago, in which I lost a baby, and that my brother-in-law was driving.

I never really thought the accident was his fault, but I haven't ridden in a car with him since then. In fact, I've ridden with very few drivers since then.

Tomorrow my son and I need a ride from the train station to my in-laws' house, and my brother-in-law is the only one available to pick us up. I just called him and made the arrangement.

He was very happy I called. I'm not sure if he thought about the accident at all. I didn't bring it up, and I'm not going to.

There will be a car seat for my son.

I just can't justify ordering a car service when my brother-in-law is available. And I can't justify calling off the visit, or waiting until the morning to go out there, just to avoid this car ride.

My husband will be playing a show, so he won't be joining us until quite late. His parents are away and we've really been looking forward to enjoying their air-conditioned, satellite-TVed, in-ground-swimming-pooled home for as many hours as possible this weekend.

Is this a big deal? I feel really weird about it.

[miss_american_pie]

1. If it's a big deal to you, it's a big deal

Emotions are rarely based on logic, KWIM? :hug:

[rbnyc]

2. I'm actually so relieved...

...it turns out my husband's show is later than we thought, and he can drive me.

Woo-Hoo!

:hug:

[flamingyouth]

3. Glad it worked out for you

I've been in two (less severe, but still...) car accidents in a year, and I *completely* understand where you're coming from.

Nice to see you. :hug:

[rbnyc]

6. Thanks so much.

Nice to see you too.

[LeftyMom]

4. Are you still thinking about getting your DL?

I remember we talked about that a while back. I wound up taking professional lessons and passed my test just fine the first time. You should go for it, it was much easier than I thought it would be and didn't make me nervous at all.

[rbnyc]

7. I'm still thinking about it...

...but not as seriously as I was when we were thinking of moving upstate. Now that I work in my own neighborhood, I don't think about it as much...not planning anything yet, that's for sure.

That's awesome that you got your license!

[Avalux]

5. Yes, it's a very big deal.

I was in a really bad car accident a little over a year ago - my 19 year old daughter was driving. It wasn't her fault and I know that, but I can't get in a car with her now. I tried to do it once and almost had a panic attack; everything came back to me. It's not something you can control and it's certainly not personal. There's nothing wrong with feeling the way you do.

I just read your husband can drive you now - glad he'll be able to. Take care. :hug:

[rbnyc]

8. Thanks so much for posting.

I'm glad my feelings are pretty normal--and really glad my husband can pick me up tonight.

:hi:

[eyesroll]

9. I'll second everyone's "it's normal" here.

I've never been in a bad accident, but my SO has. He was driving (sitting at a stoplight) a Civic and was hit by a drunk in an SUV. He hit the windshield (even though he was wearing a seat belt), had a brain injury, lost most of the sight in his right eye, internal injuries, etc. 6 weeks in the hospital, months of rehab, he'll never be 100%.

It took him a couple of years to be able to get behind the wheel again, and he still doesn't trust SUVs. But if he's in certain moods, ANYONE's driving makes him freak out (I've actually pulled over to let him drive once).

So yeah. Totally understandable.