10 random questions:

[Deep13]

1. Are you a cat person? dog person? or one of those weird exotic pet owners?

2. Which of the following is not a sport: auto racing, eating, figure skating, pro wrestling, golf?

3. Why did someone crap in my mailbox?

4. Those Republicans, do they suck or what?

5. Have you adopted a snowflake baby? Is it because your ice cube tray is already full?

6. How could I dance with another, ooooooooo, when I saw her standing there?

7. If you have nothing to hide why are you afraid of being wiretapped/spied on/body cavity searched?

8. In the film Roadhouse, why didn't Patrick Swazye take the injured Sam Eliot to the E-room instead of leaving him in agony on a filthy bar counter since he was going to the hospital anyway to warn his girlfriend?

9. Is it fair to make someone wait to buy a handgun when after five days I'm not mad anymore?

10. When dit we stop saying macaroni and start saying pasta?

[tjwmason]

1. Here we go.

1. Are you a cat person? dog person? or one of those weird exotic pet owners?

I'm a non-pet person.

2. Which of the following is not a sport: auto racing, eating, figure skating, pro wrestling, golf?

All of them.

3. Why did someone crap in my mailbox?

By accident, you should have a letter box which looks like a lavatory. :eyes:

4. Those Republicans, do they suck or what?

Utterly suck.

5. Have you adopted a snowflake baby? Is it because your ice cube tray is already full?

No, that would be too close to a pet for me (see question 1).

6. How could I dance with another, ooooooooo, when I saw her standing there?

Normally by joining hands and moving one's legs into the right positions in time with the music. :shrug:

7. If you have nothing to hide why are you afraid of being wiretapped/spied on/body cavity searched?

Because it has be shown over here that the fact of having been searched is sufficient to arouse suspicion in the future.

8. In the film Roadhouse, why didn't Patrick Swazye take the injured Sam Eliot to the E-room instead of leaving him in agony on a filthy bar counter since he was going to the hospital anyway to warn his girlfriend?

Because he was a nasty person? :shrug:

9. Is it fair to make someone wait to buy a handgun when after five days I'm not mad anymore?

Handgun ban over here - which seems to mean one just has to use the black-market.

10. When dit we stop saying macaroni and start saying pasta?

What are we talking about? If we're talking about macaroni I still say macaroni - if we're talking about spaghetti, linguini, tagliatelli, fusilli &c. then I use the relevant term - if we're talking about some generic unidentified form of pasta (which may or may not be macaroni) I say pasta. Always have done.

[ForrestGump]

2. 10 back

1. Are you a cat person? dog person? or one of those weird exotic pet owners?

Cat. Felines rule.

2. Which of the following is not a sport: auto racing, eating, figure skating, pro wrestling, golf?

Which is? Though figure skating and pro wrestling require prodigious athletic skills, at least. Auto racing requires incredible coordination and lots of sweat, so it's also sportish. Eating is a hobby. Golf is people in ugly clothes walking around (or, more often these days in this lazy country, tooling around in golf carts).

3. Why did someone crap in my mailbox?

No I didn't. I merely picked up one a dog left nearby.

4. Those Republicans, do they suck or what?

They sure do. The neocons, anyway, though by now anyone who's in the Republican fold at all warrants some suspicion.

5. Have you adopted a snowflake baby? Is it because your ice cube tray is already full?

Tragic blowdryer accident when I tried to style its hair.

6. How could I dance with another, ooooooooo, when I saw her standing there?

'cos you're a male slut.

7. If you have nothing to hide why are you afraid of being wiretapped/spied on/body cavity searched?

I might enjoy it.

8. In the film Roadhouse, why didn't Patrick Swazye take the injured Sam Eliot to the E-room instead of leaving him in agony on a filthy bar counter since he was going to the hospital anyway to warn his girlfriend?

Because there's a homoerotic undercurrent that also ties in to him coveting Sam Elliot's moustache (and voice...and acting ability). So he got confused.

9. Is it fair to make someone wait to buy a handgun when after five days I'm not mad anymore?

Only if they're mad at you.

10. When dit we stop saying macaroni and start saying pasta?

When it's not macaroni.

[Rabrrrrrr]

3. Hmmm..

1. Are you a cat person? dog person? or one of those weird exotic pet owners? Cat. Dogs are the suck. Totally.

2. Which of the following is not a sport: auto racing, eating, figure skating, pro wrestling, golf? Auto Racing

3. Why did someone crap in my mailbox? Because you are a nazi and a communist LIEbrul

4. Those Republicans, do they suck or what? They suck!

5. Have you adopted a snowflake baby? Is it because your ice cube tray is already full? No, and I never will.

6. How could I dance with another, ooooooooo, when I saw her standing there? Your coldhearted assholery makes it possible

7. If you have nothing to hide why are you afraid of being wiretapped/spied on/body cavity searched? Fear of radiation

8. In the film Roadhouse, why didn't Patrick Swazye take the injured Sam Eliot to the E-room instead of leaving him in agony on a filthy bar counter since he was going to the hospital anyway to warn his girlfriend? Cuz Patrick Swayze is one of the most ignorant untalented assholes in hollywood

9. Is it fair to make someone wait to buy a handgun when after five days I'm not mad anymore? Totally unfair

10. When dit we stop saying macaroni and start saying pasta? When we grew up, at least a little bit, and decided it was time to start naming things properly and not like a fucking moron typical American

[flvegan]

4. Mmmkay...

1. Are you a cat person? dog person? or one of those weird exotic pet owners?
More of a dog person, though we care for some strays here as well.

2. Which of the following is not a sport: auto racing, eating, figure skating, pro wrestling, golf?
They're all sports to somebody. I'll choose "eating" though, as it just shouldn't be.

3. Why did someone crap in my mailbox?
It's "recycled" spam.

4. Those Republicans, do they suck or what?
I wish they would. Then maybe we could impeach that bastard.

5. Have you adopted a snowflake baby? Is it because your ice cube tray is already full?
I poured scotch over mine.

6. How could I dance with another, ooooooooo, when I saw her standing there?
Because you knew that "another" put out, and "standing there" didn't.

7. If you have nothing to hide why are you afraid of being wiretapped/spied on/body cavity searched?
Simple. Fear that my lust for the Hoff will be discovered.

8. In the film Roadhouse, why didn't Patrick Swazye take the injured Sam Eliot to the E-room instead of leaving him in agony on a filthy bar counter since he was going to the hospital anyway to warn his girlfriend?
It was the opening to opt to make a sequel: Roadhouse II, the Wrath of a Country Dive Bouncer

9. Is it fair to make someone wait to buy a handgun when after five days I'm not mad anymore?
Shotguns, aisle 10, no waiting.

10. When dit we stop saying macaroni and start saying pasta?
When did we stop saying "scettie" or "psscettie"?

[Katina]

5. random indeed

1. Are you a cat person? dog person? or one of those weird exotic pet owners? cat

2. Which of the following is not a sport: auto racing, eating, figure skating, pro wrestling, golf? eating

3. Why did someone crap in my mailbox? did you let your pet crap on their lawn and not clean it up?

4. Those Republicans, do they suck or what? which republicans?

5. Have you adopted a snowflake baby? No Is it because your ice cube tray is already full? automatic ice maker

6. How could I dance with another, ooooooooo, when I saw her standing there? it was Anne Coulter, you would dance with anyone but her.

7. If you have nothing to hide why are you afraid of being wiretapped/spied on/body cavity searched? I'm not except the body cavity search might hurt

8. In the film Roadhouse, why didn't Patrick Swazye take the injured Sam Eliot to the E-room instead of leaving him in agony on a filthy bar counter since he was going to the hospital anyway to warn his girlfriend? ???

9. Is it fair to make someone wait to buy a handgun when after five days I'm not mad anymore? :hippie:

10. When dit we stop saying macaroni and start saying pasta? when political correctness became vogue

[Deep13]

9. "did you let your pet crap on their lawn and not clean it up?"

Um, nope. No pets.

[unpossibles]

42. no, I think PC becoming vogue made people stop calling

people funny names. They are actually two different things (see my post).

[LeftyMom]

6. .

1. Are you a cat person? dog person? or one of those weird exotic pet owners?

I like cats and dogs both. But I'm not crazy about small dogs.

2. Which of the following is not a sport: auto racing, eating, figure skating, pro wrestling, golf?

Competitive eating is a cruel joke in a world where people go hungry. It is not a sport.

3. Why did someone crap in my mailbox?

You deserved it somehow.

4. Those Republicans, do they suck or what?

If they did maybe they'd lighten up and enjoy life a little.

5. Have you adopted a snowflake baby? Is it because your ice cube tray is already full?

Nah, I make my own cute blonde kids. Why pay for anybody else's spare parts?

6. How could I dance with another, ooooooooo, when I saw her standing there?

Secretly you were hoping to get both girls and create a "Dear Penthouse, I never thougth this would happen to me but" moment.

7. If you have nothing to hide why are you afraid of being wiretapped/spied on/body cavity searched?

Who's doing the searching? Are they hot?

8. In the film Roadhouse, why didn't Patrick Swazye take the injured Sam Eliot to the E-room instead of leaving him in agony on a filthy bar counter since he was going to the hospital anyway to warn his girlfriend?

I've never seen that movie.

9. Is it fair to make someone wait to buy a handgun when after five days I'm not mad anymore

Yes. Life rewards those to plan ahead. Buy a gun now or you won't be able to shoot somebody you love later.

10. When dit we stop saying macaroni and start saying pasta?

It's all a part of the evil Italian-American conspiracy and part of our revenge for the creation of Chef Boyardee. Another aspect of our revenge is Fat Tony Scalia- did you ever think he actually belives this crazy shit? No, he's just fucking with the WASPs.

[Deep13]

10. "You deserved it somehow."

Oh sure, blame the victim! Glad I have one of those plastic mailboxes. I just hosed it out.

[ghostsofgiants]

7. 10 random answers...

1. Are you a cat person? dog person? or one of those weird exotic pet owners?
Dog

2. Which of the following is not a sport: auto racing, eating, figure skating, pro wrestling, golf?
Auto racing.

3. Why did someone crap in my mailbox?
Couldn't find a toilet?

4. Those Republicans, do they suck or what?
Are they people? If they're people, then yes, they do.

5. Have you adopted a snowflake baby? Is it because your ice cube tray is already full?
Yes. Yes.

6. How could I dance with another, ooooooooo, when I saw her standing there?
Mad skillz.

7. If you have nothing to hide why are you afraid of being wiretapped/spied on/body cavity searched?
Superhero with secret identity.

8. In the film Roadhouse, why didn't Patrick Swazye take the injured Sam Eliot to the E-room instead of leaving him in agony on a filthy bar counter since he was going to the hospital anyway to warn his girlfriend?
Because I've never seen Roadhouse.

9. Is it fair to make someone wait to buy a handgun when after five days I'm not mad anymore?
It's un-American is what it is.

10. When dit we stop saying macaroni and start saying pasta?
When they invented pastas other than macaroni?

[Deep13]

8. Here's mine:

1. Are you a cat person? dog person? or one of those weird exotic pet owners?
Cat person: small, no leashes required, not needy, dig the relaxed attitude. Also, rabbits are cool too. Don't actually have any pets because I am too lazy to care for them and they aggravate my allergies.

2. Which of the following is not a sport: auto racing, eating, figure skating, pro wrestling, golf?
I'm going to say eating because it reminds me that we are too fat as a nation and auto racing because driving around like that is what normally happens on the highway at 5pm anyway.

3. Why did someone crap in my mailbox?
I still have no idea.

4. Those Republicans, do they suck or what?
Yes, but they do not swallow.

5. Have you adopted a snowflake baby? Is it because your ice cube tray is already full?
Yes, I keep it mounted on a microscope slide in the family photo album.

6. How could I dance with another, ooooooooo, when I saw her standing there?
Well, my heart went boom, when I crossed the room and I held her hand in mine.

7. If you have nothing to hide why are you afraid of being wiretapped/spied on/body cavity searched?
Cold fingers.

8. In the film Roadhouse, why didn't Patrick Swazye take the injured Sam Eliot to the E-room instead of leaving him in agony on a filthy bar counter since he was going to the hospital anyway to warn his girlfriend?
While we are on the subject, how did that Mercedes manage to drive itself for like a quarter mile across that field and through a fence?

9. Is it fair to make someone wait to buy a handgun when after five days I'm not mad anymore?
Nevermind, I found the bat a lot more satisfying anyway.

10. When did we stop saying macaroni and start saying pasta?
Same time we stopped saying ha-RASS-ment and started saying HAR-ass-ment.

[femmocrat]

11. Here ya' go...

1. Are you a cat person? dog person? or one of those weird exotic pet owners? I have 2 dogs and one cat, but I love the dogs so much more.

2. Which of the following is not a sport: auto racing, eating, figure skating, pro wrestling, golf? Eating?

3. Why did someone crap in my mailbox? Someone or Something?

4. Those Republicans, do they suck or what? YES

5. Have you adopted a snowflake baby? Is it because your ice cube tray is already full? N/A

6. How could I dance with another, ooooooooo, when I saw her standing there? Because someone put Baby in the corner?

7. If you have nothing to hide why are you afraid of being wiretapped/spied on/body cavity searched? I have fear of being touched. The wiretapping .... not without a warrant!

8. In the film Roadhouse, why didn't Patrick Swazye take the injured Sam Eliot to the E-room instead of leaving him in agony on a filthy bar counter since he was going to the hospital anyway to warn his girlfriend? Didn't see it.

9. Is it fair to make someone wait to buy a handgun when after five days I'm not mad anymore? Does someone = you?

10. When did we stop saying macaroni and start saying pasta? Macaroni is different. It is the short elbow kind. Pasta includes linguini, rigatoni, fusilli, etc. Pasta is more inclusive!

[Mutley]

12. Ten answers:

1. Are you a cat person? dog person? or one of those weird exotic pet owners?
I love all animals, but I only have a dog at the moment.

2. Which of the following is not a sport: auto racing, eating, figure skating, pro wrestling, golf?
Eating. Though I don't care much for the others, I can't really say they aren't sports.

3. Why did someone crap in my mailbox?
He (or she, you just never know) couldn't make it to the bathroom.

4. Those Republicans, do they suck or what?
Suck what? Maybe I don't want to know.

5. Have you adopted a snowflake baby? Is it because your ice cube tray is already full?
What's a snowflake baby?

6. How could I dance with another, ooooooooo, when I saw her standing there?
Well she looked at me, and I, I could see
That before too long I'd fall in love with her
She wouldn't dance with another (Whooh)
When I saw her standing there


7. If you have nothing to hide why are you afraid of being wiretapped/spied on/body cavity searched?
I'm not afraid of those things happening specifically to me, but I am afraid of them happening to other innocent people. If we accept those violations, then what comes next?

8. In the film Roadhouse, why didn't Patrick Swazye take the injured Sam Eliot to the E-room instead of leaving him in agony on a filthy bar counter since he was going to the hospital anyway to warn his girlfriend?
I don't remember. It's been a long time since I've seen that movie.

9. Is it fair to make someone wait to buy a handgun when after five days I'm not mad anymore?
LOL! Maybe that's the point of the waiting period.

10. When dit we stop saying macaroni and start saying pasta?
Isn't macaroni just one type of pasta? I still eat macaroni and cheese.

[Deep13]

13. "What's a snowflake baby?"

Human blastocytes (undifferentiated embryonic cells) being stored in liquid nitrogen at fertility clinics for artificial insemination purposes. Some Fundy screw-balls think they have souls and should be adopted and brought to term by volunteers.

[Mutley]

15. I was a happier person when I didn't know that.

:crazy:

[mainegreen]

14. OK, I'm game

1) Cat person
2) Eating
3) Because they are 10 and have a crush on you
4) They blow. Not suck. Blow.
5) :bounce:
6) You couldn't
7) My cavities are sacred
8) Because Chuck Norris told him to
9) No, of course not.
10) The better question is when did we stop saying Chef Boyardee?

[ProfessorGAC]

16. My Non-Random Answers

1. Are you a cat person? dog person? or one of those weird exotic pet owners?
Have both cats and a dog. I'm probably more dog person, wife is probably more cat person, but really we're just pet people.

2. Which of the following is not a sport: auto racing, eating, figure skating, pro wrestling, golf?
Eating

3. Why did someone crap in my mailbox?
You did it. You explain it.

4. Those Republicans, do they suck or what?
They do. No elaboration is needed.

5. Have you adopted a snowflake baby? Is it because your ice cube tray is already full?
No & no, it's because that term makes me want to set myself on fire.

6. How could I dance with another, ooooooooo, when I saw her standing there?
I didn't. I married her

7. If you have nothing to hide why are you afraid of being wiretapped/spied on/body cavity searched?
I don't want to be wiretapped, etc precisely BECAUSE I HAVE NOTHING TO HIDE! So there!

8. In the film Roadhouse, why didn't Patrick Swazye take the injured Sam Eliot to the E-room instead of leaving him in agony on a filthy bar counter since he was going to the hospital anyway to warn his girlfriend?
He was a psychic and he knew death was inevitible. Didn't know that did ya?

9. Is it fair to make someone wait to buy a handgun when after five days I'm not mad anymore?
It depends upon who you were mad at. If it's me you're mad at, then yes it's fair. If it's a republican, then no it isn't fair.

10. When dit we stop saying macaroni and start saying pasta?
WE didn't. You may have! I still call the noodles by their real name, just like the rest of my sicilian family. And don't argue or you'll make me mad. And you don't want to make a sicilian mad.
The Professor

[Deep13]

17. "You did it. You explain it."

That is the one explanation I can immediately rule out. All I know is that the mailbox was empty (and clean) leaving in the morning and full of shit upon returning in the evening.

[ProfessorGAC]

19. Well, That's Your Side Of The Story

But, i have no corroboration. I mean, come on! You sure you have no history of split personality or anything like that? :evilgrin:

Seriously though, that is bizarre.
The Professor

[Deep13]

20. Let me ask the voices in my head.

Nope, they didn't do it either.

[Phillycat]

18. My answers

1. Are you a cat person? dog person? or one of those weird exotic pet owners?

I like both, but can't have a dog because I live alone and am away from home too much. So kitty it is!

2. Which of the following is not a sport: auto racing, eating, figure skating, pro wrestling, golf?

They are all sports.

3. Why did someone crap in my mailbox?

Because you pissed in their rosebushes?

4. Those Republicans, do they suck or what?

They really, really do.

5. Have you adopted a snowflake baby? Is it because your ice cube tray is already full?

Nope, but I have a friend who has some snowflake babies and doesn't know what to do with them.

6. How could I dance with another, ooooooooo, when I saw her standing there?

Because you're a lying, cheating bastard? :P

7. If you have nothing to hide why are you afraid of being wiretapped/spied on/body cavity searched?

I'm not. Spy away, I have nothing to hide!

8. In the film Roadhouse, why didn't Patrick Swazye take the injured Sam Eliot to the E-room instead of leaving him in agony on a filthy bar counter since he was going to the hospital anyway to warn his girlfriend?

I've never seen Roadhouse.

9. Is it fair to make someone wait to buy a handgun when after five days I'm not mad anymore?

Um...this question scares me.

10. When did we stop saying macaroni and start saying pasta?

When elbow macaroni got so popular that the word referred only to that specific item, culturally.

[liontamer]

21. ok

1. Are you a cat person? dog person? or one of those weird exotic pet owners? I think most small fluffy animals are equally viable as pets

2. Which of the following is not a sport: auto racing, eating, figure skating, pro wrestling, golf? figure skating is the only one I'll really count as a sport. maybe golf.

3. Why did someone crap in my mailbox? Unless you have an oddly positioned mailbox, it's unlikely that they crapped in it, rather they felt like sticking crap in there. This question can't be answered unless you state whether the crap was human or dog.

4. Those Republicans, do they suck or what? If I learned anything from clinton's impeachment, it's that republicans most definately do not suck. At least not outside the confines of a marriage.

5. Have you adopted a snowflake baby? Is it because your ice cube tray is already full? no. no.

6. How could I dance with another, ooooooooo, when I saw her standing there? she was standing far away, the other asked you, and being male you were incapable of saying no.

7. If you have nothing to hide why are you afraid of being wiretapped/spied on/body cavity searched? I have plenty to hide. particularly my body cavities :)

8. In the film Roadhouse, why didn't Patrick Swazye take the injured Sam Eliot to the E-room instead of leaving him in agony on a filthy bar counter since he was going to the hospital anyway to warn his girlfriend? didn't see roadhouse, guessing he didn't want to pick up his friend and drive him cause that would seem kind of, you know, gay.

9. Is it fair to make someone wait to buy a handgun when after five days I'm not mad anymore? Yes. If you know you're a violent angry person you should plan ahead. Nobody is going to reward you for poor planning.

10. When dit we stop saying macaroni and start saying pasta? When we stopped talking to little kids, and started talking to adults.

[Deep13]

23. "unless you state whether the crap was human or dog"

Guess I don't have the lab results. It is a regular suburban curb-mounted mailbox. There was a lot covering the open door and just inside. It appeared to have been rained on. There was a cigarette butt in it. That was the extent of the investigation.

[YankeyMCC]

22. 1. I think I'm becoming a cat person

I've always considered myself a dog person and have had dogs as pets much of my life but somehow the level of attention and responsibility required to own a dog is beginning to grate on me - maybe I'm just getting cranky in my old age. It seems like a cat is much easier - no worrying about getting home in time to let them out to go to the bathroom for example.

2. Umm...all of the above...some certainly take skill and maybe provide interesting competition but to me spot is athletic skill combined with competition not just physical activity and competition.

3. Ah because it was there?

4. Yes

5. No I wouldn't want to support embryonic stem cell research (no flames please I'm being sarcastic)

6. You can't of course

7. Who said I have nothing to hide? ;)

8. Wasn't in the script

9. lol

10. 8:12 AM November 14th 1983

[otherlander]

24. Okay.....

1. Are you a cat person? dog person? or one of those weird exotic pet owners? Dog person.

2. Which of the following is not a sport: auto racing, eating, figure skating, pro wrestling, golf? Eating.

3. Why did someone crap in my mailbox? Because someone laced their pot with angel dust and they were having these really fucked up hallucinations, which made the mailbox appear as a toilet...a rather furry toilet, but a toilet nonetheless. But I've already said too much.

4. Those Republicans, do they suck or what? They what.

5. Have you adopted a snowflake baby? Is it because your ice cube tray is already full? That doesn't make any sense...shouldn't it be the other way around? Like, because your ice cube tray was empty?

6. How could I dance with another, ooooooooo, when I saw her standing there? Well, you could...stop, hey, what's that sound? Everybody look, what's goin' down...

7. If you have nothing to hide why are you afraid of being wiretapped/spied on/body cavity searched? They'll find out who I'm the reincarnation of, and kill me. (Death was bad enough the first time...)

8. In the film Roadhouse, why didn't Patrick Swazye take the injured Sam Eliot to the E-room instead of leaving him in agony on a filthy bar counter since he was going to the hospital anyway to warn his girlfriend? Because he thought that Eliot was the antichrist.

9. Is it fair to make someone wait to buy a handgun when after five days I'm not mad anymore? No.

10. When dit we stop saying macaroni and start saying pasta? When the cornfield was planted.

[Deep13]

25. "because your ice cube tray was empty"

Okay, it's very simple. If your ice cube tray is already full then you cannot adopt a snowflake baby because you have no place to put it. The second part of the question assumes a negative answer to the forst part because no one ever adopts snowflake babies.

[Initech]

26. I'll play:

1. I'm allergic to cats, so I'm a dog person by default!

2. All of the above

3. It wasnt me, I swear!

4. Fuck yeah!

5. :wtf:

6. Beatles?

7. Thankfully, I've never been on the recieving end of a cavity search. :scared:

8. Never seen it.

9. Wasnt that a Homer Simpson quote? "Three days? But I'm mad now!"

10. No clue.

[Deep13]

27. Beatles, Homer Simpson

The gun question was lifted from an episode of Murphy Brown. She was hosting a radio call-in show and someone called with a similar question.

She was just 17,
If you know what I mean,
And the way she looked was way beyond compare.
So, how could I dance with another, ooooo, when I saw her standing there?
Now she looked at me
and I, I could see
that before too long, i'd fall in love with her
No,she wouldn't dance with another,
since I saw her standing there

Well my heart went boom, when I crossed the room and I held her hand in miiiiiine.
Well we danced through the night
and we held each other tight
and before to long, i fell in love with her.
O she wouldn't dance with another ooooooo
since I saw her standing there.

It is a Beatles song for the beginning of their run.

[Deep13]

28. Patrick Swayze Xmas song (Mystery Science Theater)

321 Santa Claus Conquers the Martians
"A Patrick Swayze X-mas"



JOEL: I think it's kind of, uh, hot to be wearing these scarves in here.

SERVO: Oh, yeah.

CROW: Well, scarves are a must. You can't go caroling without a scarf. Catch
your death!

JOEL: Man, you were like one of those kids I remember in, uh, high school that
used to sell the most candybars for the marching band.

SERVO: Yeah, and you'd be president of the swing choir, too.

CROW: Ha ha! Ah, thanks, Joel Robinson. Thanks, Tom Servo.

SERVO: What a kiss-up, this guy.

CROW: Okay, now if you'll all look at your sheet music, uh, we can rehearse my
new song.

JOEL: You wrote a Christmas song?

CROW: Hey, there's no tradition like a new tradition! Ha ha ha!

SERVO: Um, wait a minute. "Let's Have a Patrick Swayze Christmas?"

CROW: Oh, yeah, yeah. Based on my favorite movie, _Roadhouse_.

SERVO: C'mon, what the heck does *PATRICK SWAYZE* have to do with
*CHRISTMAS*?!

CROW: Hey, you keep Christmas in your way, and let me keep it in mine, okay?

SERVO: Oh, jeeesss.

JOEL: Hey, cmon, Tom Servo, it seems like a nice enough sentiment and we can
give it a shot. C'mon.

CROW: All right. Okay. Okay. Uh, 12/8 time, uh, key of A-flat major--

SERVO: Good.

CROW: Uh, Cambot, shoot 'em the tune. Uh, okay, you'll just have to stay with
me, everybody, okay? Uh, your part's written out. Let's have a Patrick
Swayze Christmas, by Crow T. Robot.

JOEL: "Paul, let's have a Patrick Swayze Christmas"?

CROW: Right. Hit it, Cambot!

SERVO: Oh! Oh, I start. I get it. Hmm.

CROW: I'm sorry.

SERVO: Pick it up. "Open up your heart and let the Patrick Swayze Christmas
in."

CROW: "We'll gather at the Roadhouse with our next of kin."

SERVO: Not bad!

JOEL: "And Santa can be our regular Saturday night thing."

'BOTS: "We'll decorate our barstools and gather round and sing."

SERVO: "Oh, let's have a Patrick Swayze Christmas this year!"

CROW: "Or we'll tear your throat out and kick you in the ear!"

JOEL: Hold it, hold it a sec. Cambot, stop it. Uh, Crow, I don't know if I
think this is an appropriate sentiment anymore for Christmas.

CROW: Hey, what? Like a good action sequence don't belong in Christmas?

JOEL: Well, no, it's just that I've never heard of an action sequence in a
Christmas carol before.

SERVO: Well, yeah!

CROW: Well, then grab hold o' your socks and read on, Joel Robinson!

SERVO: Okay, pick it up from measure 20, Cambot. Lovely intro, though. Very
tasteful.

CROW: Thank you.

SERVO: I like that. "It's my way or the highway, this Christmas at my ba-ha-
haar."

CROW: "I'll have to smash your kneecaps if you bastards touch my car!"

JOEL: "I got the word that Santa has been stealing from the till."

'BOTS: "I think that that right jolly old elf better make out his will, ohh,"

ALL: "Oh, let's have a Patrick Swayze Christmas, one and all. And this can be
the haziest . . . this can be the laziest. . . this can be the Swayziest
Christmas of them *AAALLLLLLLLLL*!"

SERVO: "La la la laa ha HAAA!"

CROW: How long before it becomes a standard?

JOEL: I think you gotta come with me. C'mon.

CROW: Waaaaah!

SERVO: We'll be right back. Oooh. Save a leg for me! Heh heh heh.

[Gatchaman]

29. answers

1. Are you a cat person? dog person? or one of those weird exotic pet owners?
Cat person. Dogs are idiots.


2. Which of the following is not a sport: auto racing, eating, figure skating, pro wrestling, golf?
Eating.


3. Why did someone crap in my mailbox?
Cause you kept yelling at them to get off your damn lawn


4. Those Republicans, do they suck or what?
Like, totally.


5. Have you adopted a snowflake baby? Is it because your ice cube tray is already full?
I don't like frozeen children, prefer fresh.


6. How could I dance with another, ooooooooo, when I saw her standing there?
Well, she was just seventeen, if you know what I mean.


7. If you have nothing to hide why are you afraid of being wiretapped/spied on/body cavity searched?
Body cavity searches make baby Jesus's asshole bleed.


8. In the film Roadhouse, why didn't Patrick Swazye take the injured Sam Eliot to the E-room instead of leaving him in agony on a filthy bar counter since he was going to the hospital anyway to warn his girlfriend?
Cause it was his way or the highway.


9. Is it fair to make someone wait to buy a handgun when after five days I'm not mad anymore?
Yes, if they're so mad they should consider shotguns.


10. When dit we stop saying macaroni and start saying pasta?
After that terrible dance song, the Macaroni.

[Deep13]

31. "Body cavity searches...

...make baby Jesus's asshole bleed."



:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

[Burma Jones]

30. Lemme Tell Ya Somethin'

1. I do not own pets, I have children......

2. None of them is a sport in my estimation. Auto Racing is a spectacle, figure skating is dance, Pro Wrestling gives racists the illusion that white guys are Champion athletes, competitive eating is something you do at a County Fair and Golf is a splendid game that some people play well enough for other people to want to pay to watch.

3. When ya gotta go, ya gotta go

4. Republicans do not suck, that would take too much effort to benefit someone else.....

5. No. There are already too many flakes.

6. One, Two, Three ----- FUCK.......

7. I don't mind being body cavity searched if I get a nice dinner first and maybe some appropriate music

8. Where's the monkey?

9. If you're angry enough, a Baseball bat will do the trick.

10. It's Clinton's fault.

[Dulcinea]

32. OK, I'm game.

1. Dog person.

2. Eating.

3. Because they COULD.

4. Would someone give Boy George a blowjob so we can impeach him?

5. No thanks. I already have 2 kids of my own.

6. The Beatles version or the Tiffany version? :evilgrin:

7. No one is searching my body cavities except me, my husband or my gyn.

8. I've never seen that movie. I heard it sucked.

9. Life's not fair.

10. Did we? I still call macaroni & cheese macaroni. Pasta is the stuff you put other kinds of sauce on.

[Deep13]

34. The Beatles version or the Tiffany version?

You've GOT to be kidding me!

[GOPBasher]

33. My answers.

My answers are in italics.

1. Are you a cat person? dog person? or one of those weird exotic pet owners?
I like dogs much better.

2. Which of the following is not a sport: auto racing, eating, figure skating, pro wrestling, golf?
Not one of those is a sport.

3. Why did someone crap in my mailbox?
Republicans get bored.

4. Those Republicans, do they suck or what?
Nah, sometimes you need a little unjustified war, fiscal debt, trade debt, energy crisis, health care crisis, global warming denial, environmental destruction, labor law destruction, social security and medicare destruction, college student loan gutting, corruption, cronyism, incompetence in national crises, civil liberty dismantling and public education dismantling in order to brighten up the day. Otherwise, life is kinda boring.

5. Have you adopted a snowflake baby? Is it because your ice cube tray is already full?
No, but my favorite kind of fruit is pink.

6. How could I dance with another, ooooooooo, when I saw her standing there?
Because in the 1980 olympics, the US pulled off an amazing upset over the Russians in ice hockey.

7. If you have nothing to hide why are you afraid of being wiretapped/spied on/body cavity searched?
I'm not; I fucking love fascist, totalitarian dictatorships. Whenever I read Orwell books, I just imagine how wonderful it would be if our nation were like that. Pretty soon, I won't have to imagine!

8. In the film Roadhouse, why didn't Patrick Swazye take the injured Sam Eliot to the E-room instead of leaving him in agony on a filthy bar counter since he was going to the hospital anyway to warn his girlfriend?
I'm still wondering, when they filmed Roadhouse, how come they didn't stop filming it and shoot the person who wrote it?

9. Is it fair to make someone wait to buy a handgun when after five days I'm not mad anymore?
That's a good point. And why the fuck won't they let me buy a tank?

10. When dit we stop saying macaroni and start saying pasta?
When Italians like GOPBasher got all pissed off.

[Deep13]

35. I'm shocked, SHOCKED by the narrow view of macaroni on this thread.

When I was small in the 1960s, we had spagetti, egg noodles and macaroni. Macaroni was essentially all noodles that were not spagetti or made with egg yolks. Granted I was only 3 years old then, but this persisted into the 1970s. Now, I'm being told that only tubular macaroni is actually "macaroni." Since we have started using the term pasta in the 1970s, we have apparently allowed Kraft to define macaroni as a component of that artificail, powered shit they call macaroni and cheese. As a side note, when my mother used to cook macaroni and cheese it was with actual cheese with bread crumbs and baked in a Pyrex bowl in the oven.

[unpossibles]

44. thank you!

no one else knew that. I feel speshul.

[WritingIsMyReligion]

36. yo-kay.

1. Are you a cat person? dog person? or one of those weird exotic pet owners?

Cat, mostly definitely, though I love my African Grey parrot very much. :loveya:

2. Which of the following is not a sport: auto racing, eating, figure skating, pro wrestling, golf?

Auto racing and eating. :P

3. Why did someone crap in my mailbox?

Ya prob'ly deserved it. :evilgrin:

4. Those Republicans, do they suck or what?

Like a mofo.

5. Have you adopted a snowflake baby? Is it because your ice cube tray is already full?

No snowflakes here. :D

6. How could I dance with another, ooooooooo, when I saw her standing there?

Goddamn...I can't think what song that is. x(

7. If you have nothing to hide why are you afraid of being wiretapped/spied on/body cavity searched?

Personal liberties, and all that.

8. In the film Roadhouse, why didn't Patrick Swazye take the injured Sam Eliot to the E-room instead of leaving him in agony on a filthy bar counter since he was going to the hospital anyway to warn his girlfriend?

'Cause Swayze's a dope? Dunno. :D

9. Is it fair to make someone wait to buy a handgun when after five days I'm not mad anymore?

Yeah. :P

10. When dit we stop saying macaroni and start saying pasta?

When I came on the scene.

[Wilhelm Klink Reich]

37. 10 Rand-ian answers

1. Are you a cat person? dog person? or one of those weird exotic pet owners?

Dogs. Dogs are stupid.

2. Which of the following is not a sport: auto racing, eating, figure skating, pro wrestling, golf?

'Boys throw rocks at frogs in sport' and all that..

3. Why did someone crap in my mailbox?

Probably related to your overbearing pedantry as evidenced by Question #8; possibly your laughably schmaltzy sense of romance (Question #7). Or maybe constantly harranguing people with your demented ideas of the consciously bizarre a la Question #5. Who can say, really..:shrug:

4. Those Republicans, do they suck or what?

I'm sorry, but I'm not going to rundown that sad collection of misguided mensch and proles. They're already rundown enough trying to lead their shitty lives.

It's called moral highground, asshole!

5. Have you adopted a snowflake baby? Is it because your ice cube tray is already full?

This has to be some of the weakest sexual innuendo I've read today.

6. How could I dance with another, ooooooooo, when I saw her standing there?

Well you did. No sense in recrimination now. Unless you're Catholic..and God, errrr YHWH, help you if you're Jewish.

7. If you have nothing to hide why are you afraid of being wiretapped/spied on/body cavity searched?

Economic factors. Do you know what a cavity search goes for on the open market?

8. In the film Roadhouse, why didn't Patrick Swazye take the injured Sam Eliot to the E-room instead of leaving him in agony on a filthy bar counter since he was going to the hospital anyway to warn his girlfriend?

"Say, since you're going to the hospital anyway..think I could get a lift, buddy?"

God scorns those who bum rides. Better not to be an enabler of such wickedness.

9. Is it fair to make someone wait to buy a handgun when after five days I'm not mad anymore?

When you own an M-80, who cares!?

10. When dit we stop saying macaroni and start saying pasta?

macandcheesemacandcheesemacandcheesemacandcheesemacandcheesemacandcheese

[Deep13]

39. "It's called moral highground, asshole!"

Ouch! Is this an example of it? Anyway, why take the high ground? Politics is fought in the gutter. One of my political maxims is taking the high road leaves the low road unoccupied. Are these answers how Aynn Rand would have answered as suggested in your title? Don't know since I heeded the warnings and never read her stuff.

"Probably related to your overbearing pedantry as evidenced by Question #8; possibly your laughably schmaltzy sense of romance (Question #7). Or maybe constantly harranguing people with your demented ideas of the consciously bizarre a la Question #5. Who can say, really."

Wow, you are reading way, way too much into this.

"This has to be some of the weakest sexual innuendo I've read today."

Um, none was intended. I meant it to be read literally. Your subconcious must be one hell of a carnival ride.

"When you own an M-80, who cares!?"

A M-80 is a big firecracker.

[Wilhelm Klink Reich]

45. those were jokes

:)

[GoddessOfGuinness]

38. 10 Random replies

1. Are you a cat person? dog person? or one of those weird exotic pet owners?
All of the above

2. Which of the following is not a sport: auto racing, eating, figure skating, pro wrestling, golf?
Eating

3. Why did someone crap in my mailbox?
Because you forgot to clean out the litterbox again.

4. Those Republicans, do they suck or what?
Not only do they suck, they do a half-assed job at sucking.

5. Have you adopted a snowflake baby? Is it because your ice cube tray is already full?
No. Because my freezer stinks.

6. How could I dance with another, ooooooooo, when I saw her standing there?
You could have waited until she was 18.

7. If you have nothing to hide why are you afraid of being wiretapped/spied on/body cavity searched?
Because I value my privacy. Besides, that which is "nothing to hide" today becomes tomorrow's scandal fodder.

8. In the film Roadhouse, why didn't Patrick Swazye take the injured Sam Eliot to the E-room instead of leaving him in agony on a filthy bar counter since he was going to the hospital anyway to warn his girlfriend?
When you get into enough fistfights, eventually there's bound to be some brain damage.

9. Is it fair to make someone wait to buy a handgun when after five days I'm not mad anymore?
They should sell special guns with nerf bullets to people who are angry.

10. When dit we stop saying macaroni and start saying pasta?
When our tongues got too friggin' lazy to add two more syllables.

[Broken_Hero]

40. okay...:)

1. Are you a cat person? dog person? or one of those weird exotic pet owners?Dog person, dislike cats, a lot...

2. Which of the following is not a sport: auto racing, eating, figure skating, pro wrestling, golf? eating...

3. Why did someone crap in my mailbox?uh...what?

4. Those Republicans, do they suck or what?most of the ones I run into, have a weird sorta thinking, thats for sure. Just the other day, my neighbor said, he hates, all social programs...and yet, sat there talked about how much money he collected off Social Security, I was like...WTF?

5. Have you adopted a snowflake baby? Is it because your ice cube tray is already full? nope...

6. How could I dance with another, ooooooooo, when I saw her standing there?hmmm...

7. If you have nothing to hide why are you afraid of being wiretapped/spied on/body cavity searched?I don't want the government, or any agency, to know what I'm doing...its bad enough, that stores, credit card companies, know/share their info on you, with everyone else...

8. In the film Roadhouse, why didn't Patrick Swazye take the injured Sam Eliot to the E-room instead of leaving him in agony on a filthy bar counter since he was going to the hospital anyway to warn his girlfriend? Because Patrick Swayze, was an jerk, in that movie...plus, Sam was upstaging him, and swazye wanted him to croak.

9. Is it fair to make someone wait to buy a handgun when after five days I'm not mad anymore?yes, its fair...

10. When dit we stop saying macaroni and start saying pasta?I have no idea, i still say macaroni...

[unpossibles]

41. ok

1 - all of the above (cats, dog, parrot, and sometimes other things...)

2 - Golf

3 - I couldn't help it. Sorry.

4 - AND HOW!

5 - No, but I have been practicing for sperm donation. Just in case.

6 - Well my heart went boom...

7 - I'm generally just against the principle of it, unless you ask nicely. And no tickling.

8 - I have not seen that (!)

9 - yes, but I can teach you how to maim or kill with your bare hands if you ask me nicely.

10 - ironically I used to be a pasta maker and there is technically a difference; pasta has egg in it, macaroni does not. Most dry "pasta" is macaroni.

[YellowRubberDuckie]

43. 10 answers....

1. Are you a cat person? dog person? or one of those weird exotic pet owners? Dog. I can't wait until I get to get one.

2. Which of the following is not a sport: auto racing, eating, figure skating, pro wrestling, golf? None of them are sports. Yes, I said it!!

3. Why did someone crap in my mailbox? Because you're an asshole? No, because you're a sweetie! Because Kelso was bored? LMAO (I'm watching That 70s Show) No. Ashton's probably too busy with Demi. Um, maybe because your pet pooped in someone else's yard?

4. Those Republicans, do they suck or what? They Suck ASS

5. Have you adopted a snowflake baby? Is it because your ice cube tray is already full? Um, No.

6. How could I dance with another, ooooooooo, when I saw her standing there? Because I'm prettier?

7. If you have nothing to hide why are you afraid of being wiretapped/spied on/body cavity searched? Because I pick my nose!

8. In the film Roadhouse, why didn't Patrick Swazye take the injured Sam Eliot to the E-room instead of leaving him in agony on a filthy bar counter since he was going to the hospital anyway to warn his girlfriend? Because he was an asshole? I never watched that movie.

9. Is it fair to make someone wait to buy a handgun when after five days I'm not mad anymore? Yep.

10. When did we stop saying macaroni and start saying pasta? When it became hip to eat it.

[alfredo]

46. It's late, its Friday, but that doesn't matter when a person is

retired. Everyday is Friday if you want it to be. Today is Gurrnday. I'm retired, it can be anything I want it to be.

What were we talking about?


Oh

1. Are you a cat person? dog person? or one of those weird exotic pet owners?

yes

2. Which of the following is not a sport: auto racing, eating, figure skating, pro wrestling, golf?

Wouldn't you like to know.

3. Why did someone crap in my mailbox?

it's how they express their love and admiration. Was there any corn in it? BTW, my medicine smells like grape juice poop.

4. Those Republicans, do they suck or what?

Yeah, but they really need lessons from a person more patient than I.

5. Have you adopted a snowflake baby? Is it because your ice cube tray is already full?

It would make my Cabbage Patch kid jealous.

6. How could I dance with another, ooooooooo, when I saw her standing there?

Easy, her boy friend is big and mean.

7. If you have nothing to hide why are you afraid of being wiretapped/spied on/body cavity searched?

Why do you ask

8. In the film Roadhouse, why didn't Patrick Swazye take the injured Sam Eliot to the E-room instead of leaving him in agony on a filthy bar counter since he was going to the hospital anyway to warn his girlfriend?

who gives a shit

9. Is it fair to make someone wait to buy a handgun when after five days I'm not mad anymore?

No, but it satisfies some need, maybe its passive aggressive. I don't know.

10. When dit we stop saying macaroni and start saying pasta?

Don't know, but I do know of people who would put sugar on their macaroni and cheese.