A Fundamental Truth

[Orrex]

My commute is about 42 miles, most of it I-79, and should take (one would think) a little under an hour. However, I have determined that it is literally (a word I use advisedly) impossible for me to arrive at work any earlier than two minutes late. I can arrive later, but not earlier. Extensive experiments prove this.

Clearly there's some sort of weirdness going on in the spacetime continuum near the Pittsburgh area.