B Calm
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Tue Aug-08-06 08:46 PM
Original message |
|
How Do You Catch a Unique Rabbit? Unique Up On It.
How Do You Catch a Tame Rabbit? Tame Way.
What Is The Difference Between a Harley And a Hoover? The Location Of The Dirt Bag
|
sarge43
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Tue Aug-08-06 09:16 PM
Response to Original message |
1. The lamest of the lame |
|
Why did the chicken cross the road? If you don't know the punch{sic} line, you do need to get out more.
|
BreweryYardRat
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Tue Aug-08-06 09:17 PM
Response to Original message |
2. What's brown and sticky? |
Blue_Tires
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Wed Aug-09-06 04:48 AM
Response to Reply #2 |
grannylib
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Tue Aug-08-06 10:55 PM
Response to Original message |
3. When geese fly in formation, it's shaped like a "V" and one arm of the |
|
V is always longer than the other. Know why?
There are more geese in that one.
|
Broken_Hero
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Wed Aug-09-06 12:39 AM
Response to Original message |
|
why did the soldier salute the refrigerator?
because it was a General Electric...
What goes up, but never goes down?
your age...
What has five I's and a mouth....
The missisipi river....
|
hfojvt
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Wed Aug-09-06 12:54 AM
Response to Reply #4 |
7. but I can spell mississippi with just one "I" |
|
(puts a hand over one eye) m-i-ss-i-ss-i-pp-i
So I open my refrigerator and Elmer Fudd is sitting in there. I'm like, "dude, WTF RU doing in my refrigerator?" "Isn't this a Westinghouse?" I look at the label "yeah, it is." "I'm just westing."
Speaking of refrigerators. I always like this one.
Three guys are standing at the pearly gates. St. Peter says "tell me how you got here."
The first guys says "I suspected that my wife was having an affair. So instead of going to work I waited a few hours and came back to catch her in the act. I burst into my apartment and find my wife naked but cannot find another man. Just then I see a guy running out of the building putting his pants on while he runs. I am so furious that I pick up the refrigerator and throw it at him, and have a massive hernia that kills me." St. Peter feels sorry for him and lets him in.
The second guy says. "Well I slept through my alarm so I was late for the bus to get me to work. Being in a hurry I was still putting on my pants as I ran to catch the bus, when this refrigerator comes flying out of nowhere and flattens me." St. Peter feels sorry for him and lets him in.
The third guy starts out "There I was, sitting in this refrigerator ...
|
B Calm
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Wed Aug-09-06 04:22 AM
Response to Reply #7 |
Ptah
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Wed Aug-09-06 12:41 AM
Response to Original message |
5. Why are there labels on beer bottles? |
|
To keep your hand from sticking to the glue.
|
Fountain79
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Wed Aug-09-06 02:42 PM
Response to Reply #5 |
19. Ok...not getting that one...n/t |
Name removed
(0 posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Wed Aug-09-06 12:45 AM
Response to Original message |
|
Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.
|
mykpart
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Wed Aug-09-06 02:11 AM
Response to Original message |
8. Why did the blonde cross the road? |
|
She was stapled to the chicken.
|
billyskank
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Wed Aug-09-06 02:16 AM
Response to Original message |
9. What's yellow and dangerous? |
|
Shark-infested custard. :)
|
meegbear
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Wed Aug-09-06 06:42 AM
Response to Original message |
B Calm
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Wed Aug-09-06 04:33 PM
Response to Reply #12 |
jrandom421
(367 posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Wed Aug-09-06 01:02 PM
Response to Original message |
|
"More hay, Trigger?" "No thanks, Roy, I'm stuffed"
|
Hand
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Wed Aug-09-06 01:42 PM
Response to Original message |
14. Surprised this hasn't appeared yet... |
|
Donald Rumsfeld is briefing president Bush: “Yesterday, 3 Brazilian soldiers were killed.”
“Oh no!” exclaims the president, “that’s terrible!”
His staff is stunned at this unprecedented display of emotion, watching as Bush sits, head in hands.
Finally, he looks up and asks, “How many is a brazillion?” :boring:
|
Fountain79
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Wed Aug-09-06 01:47 PM
Response to Original message |
15. What do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? |
pagerbear
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Wed Aug-09-06 02:40 PM
Response to Original message |
16. A horse walks into a bar |
|
The bartender says, "Why the long face?"
|
RedStateShame
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Wed Aug-09-06 02:41 PM
Response to Original message |
17. Why's a chicken coop have 2 doors? |
|
'Cos if it had 4, it'd be a chicken sedan!
|
Fountain79
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Wed Aug-09-06 02:41 PM
Response to Original message |
18. Two Irish guys walk out of a pub... |
underpants
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Wed Aug-09-06 02:58 PM
Response to Original message |
20. Time flies like an arrow but fruit flies like a banana |
underpants
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Wed Aug-09-06 02:59 PM
Response to Original message |
21. Want to see a picture of my pride and joy? |
Divameow77
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Wed Aug-09-06 03:52 PM
Response to Original message |
22. Why did Tigger stick his head in the toilet? |
|
Because he was looking for Pooh
:rofl:
|
countingbluecars
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Wed Aug-09-06 04:02 PM
Response to Original message |
23. How do you make holy water? |
|
You boil the hell out of it.
|
Roon
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Wed Aug-09-06 04:08 PM
Response to Original message |
24. What do you do if your toe falls off? |
martymar64
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Wed Aug-09-06 04:14 PM
Response to Original message |
25. A Priest a Nun and a Rabbi walk into a Bar |
|
And the bartender says, "Hey! Is this some sort of joke?"
|
scarlet_owl
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Wed Aug-09-06 04:21 PM
Response to Original message |
26. What do you call a bear with no teeth? |
Nye Bevan
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Wed Aug-09-06 04:42 PM
Response to Original message |
28. What do you call a deer with no eyes? |
rug
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Wed Aug-09-06 05:35 PM
Response to Original message |
29. Why did the chicken limp across the road? |
jus_the_facts
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Wed Aug-09-06 06:04 PM
Response to Original message |
30. What's dry and smells like worms? |
Bombero1956
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Wed Aug-09-06 06:33 PM
Response to Reply #30 |
31. a mushroom walks into a bar |
|
he sits down and orders a beer.
the bartender says "we don't serve your kind here".
the mushroom says "why not I'm a fungi".
|
DU
AdBot (1000+ posts) |
Thu Apr 25th 2024, 10:42 AM
Response to Original message |