matcom
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Thu Aug-10-06 04:40 PM
Original message |
ATTENTION FOOD NETWORK - you BETTER heed my call DAMMIT! |
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it is 5:30 pm EST. normally this is "news hour" but the "news" is terra terra Bush Bush etc..etc..etc..
now, i'm sure you will agree with me that that fact makes the "news" unwatchable.
soooooooooo, seems to me 5:30 pm EST is the BEST time to get some new recipes, watch a good chili contest or gaze at Mario's orange clogs for a half hour or so until i start cooking my OWN dinner.
and you choose to air Sandra Lee :eyes:
look fuckwads. nobody gives a rat's ASS about her "friends cole-slaw recipe" that i just watched her make with CILANTRO :wtf:
it's bad enough that she is currently wearing a cheerleader turtleneck in the fucking holy-lit kitchen that makes her look more fucking pure than the baby Jesus sucking on Mary's tit while using JUST the right amount of teeth. but at the end of this mindless store-bought measured 'cooking' she will give us 15 minutes of her "TableScape" which is supposed to dazzle us with dusty fake floral arrangements surrounding at LEAST one candle stick. for fucking low-fat cole-slaw :eyes:.
oh great. now she is on to her "momma's POTATO salad"
:argh:
and NEXT UP! RACHAEL RAY!!
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bigwillq
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Thu Aug-10-06 04:42 PM
Response to Original message |
1. Sandra's always on at 5:30 p.m. est |
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followed by an hour of 30 minute meals.
Enjoy! :)
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matcom
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Thu Aug-10-06 04:44 PM
Response to Reply #1 |
3. NOW she is FRYING CHICKEN! |
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hope she breaks out the cornflakes :bounce:
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bigwillq
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Thu Aug-10-06 04:47 PM
Response to Reply #3 |
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Edited on Thu Aug-10-06 04:48 PM by bigwillq
I never watch her. :mad:
But Rachael ...my lovely Rachael ...:bounce:
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trof
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Thu Aug-10-06 04:49 PM
Response to Reply #4 |
7. She DOES have a nice chest, though. |
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If I may be a sexist pig for just a moment here. Thank you. :-)
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bigwillq
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Thu Aug-10-06 05:00 PM
Response to Reply #7 |
16. She has always reminded me of |
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Ann Coulter. I don't find Sandra attractive at all.
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DainBramaged
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Thu Aug-10-06 04:42 PM
Response to Original message |
trof
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Thu Aug-10-06 04:48 PM
Response to Reply #2 |
6. Think George W. Bush**. |
trof
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Thu Aug-10-06 04:48 PM
Response to Original message |
5. I just read your rant to Helen |
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and she collapsed into gales of laughter. Nice rant.
Can you hang on until Alton Brown comes on? I like his scientific approach. :-)
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matcom
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Thu Aug-10-06 04:53 PM
Response to Reply #5 |
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tell her i'm glad I could make her smile. next rant will be on the pure genious of the term.... BAM!
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trof
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Thu Aug-10-06 04:55 PM
Response to Reply #8 |
11. Batman "BAM"...or Emeril "BAM"? |
matcom
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Thu Aug-10-06 04:56 PM
Response to Reply #11 |
trof
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Thu Aug-10-06 05:00 PM
Response to Reply #13 |
trof
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Thu Aug-10-06 04:54 PM
Response to Original message |
9. Sandra sez: "You can use large pretzel sticks |
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for chopsticks and then eat 'em and there's NO dinnerware cleanup!"
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ThomCat
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Thu Aug-10-06 04:54 PM
Response to Original message |
10. How the hell did Sandra Lee get a cooking show? |
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And who the hell is the target audience for this shit?
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trof
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Thu Aug-10-06 04:56 PM
Response to Reply #10 |
12. Professional cheerleaders. |
Rabrrrrrr
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Thu Aug-10-06 05:10 PM
Response to Reply #12 |
HarukaTheTrophyWife
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Thu Aug-10-06 04:58 PM
Response to Original message |
14. Worse things could be done with cilantro |
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I saw a DUer once suggest making a cilantro MOJITO. Now, I'm not one of those cilantro haters, but I want my mojito as Jesus intended. With MINT! NO CILANTRO! Fuckin' Blasphemy, I tell ya.
I know you will understand.
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trof
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Thu Aug-10-06 04:59 PM
Response to Reply #14 |
15. Cilantro tastes like chlorine to me. |
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I understand it's genetic. :shrug:
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matcom
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Thu Aug-10-06 05:00 PM
Response to Reply #15 |
18. yup. cilantro is the bane of all herbs |
trof
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Thu Aug-10-06 05:15 PM
Response to Reply #18 |
31. Wow. You got the same gene as me. |
Rabrrrrrr
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Thu Aug-10-06 05:18 PM
Response to Reply #18 |
33. cool - I can't stand it, either. it's almost painful in its taste. |
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Like eating needles and bleach.
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trof
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Thu Aug-10-06 05:59 PM
Response to Reply #33 |
36. Like when you get water up your nose in an over-chlorinated swimming pool. |
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That's as close as I can come to what it tastes like to me. Gee...me, you, and matcom.
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Rabrrrrrr
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Thu Aug-10-06 07:07 PM
Response to Reply #36 |
43. That's a good description! |
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It doesn't smell at all natural. Smells like a Jersey chemical factory making cleaning supplies.
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HarukaTheTrophyWife
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Thu Aug-10-06 05:15 PM
Response to Reply #15 |
30. Yeah, to me it just tastes like cilantro. |
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However, when I was at the health food store, the cilantro haters who worked there, wouldn't even go into the stock room if we just had a fresh case of cilantro come in.
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GOPisEvil
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Thu Aug-10-06 05:03 PM
Response to Original message |
19. Sandra Lee is an abomination unto the Lord. |
matcom
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Thu Aug-10-06 05:04 PM
Response to Reply #19 |
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but the Lord sucking on Mary's tit while using JUST the right amount of teeth
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GOPisEvil
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Thu Aug-10-06 05:06 PM
Response to Reply #20 |
22. I feel like I'm going to hell just for reading that. |
matcom
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Thu Aug-10-06 05:07 PM
Response to Reply #22 |
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with JUST the right amount of teeth so Mary gets off too!
give me SOME credit! :D
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GOPisEvil
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Thu Aug-10-06 05:09 PM
Response to Reply #23 |
24. OK, so we'll take the slow train to hell. |
matcom
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Thu Aug-10-06 05:10 PM
Response to Reply #24 |
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but we can't pack any gell product so it's REALLY gonna be a long ride! x(
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GOPisEvil
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Thu Aug-10-06 05:13 PM
Response to Reply #26 |
28. You can PACK it, just have to check it... |
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...pretty soon we'll all have to fly nekkid. :eyes:
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djeseru
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Thu Aug-10-06 05:55 PM
Response to Reply #28 |
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I said the same thing to myself when reading the newest latest thing in terra alerts. :eyes:
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GOPisEvil
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Thu Aug-10-06 06:09 PM
Response to Reply #35 |
37. What a wasteful policy this is.... |
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...all that perfectly useful stuff gone down the tubes. Idiots. :eyes:
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mad-mommy
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Thu Aug-10-06 05:06 PM
Response to Original message |
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I thought cooking outside on the grill in pajamas(that I have not changed out of today) was pathetic.
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Rabrrrrrr
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Thu Aug-10-06 05:10 PM
Response to Original message |
25. She could at least have the courtesy to do the show naked. |
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The only good thing about her show is the gentle swaying and slight bouncing and heaving of her supple and firm cleavage.
In fact, even better would be just a naked close up of her amazing and godly mamallian protrusions as she drips and smears foodstuffs on them in total silence except the quiet music playing softly in the background. After 30 minutes, they roll the credits over a live shot of her eating a banana.
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matcom
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Thu Aug-10-06 05:14 PM
Response to Reply #25 |
29. but what would become of her TABLE-SCAPE??? |
Rabrrrrrr
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Thu Aug-10-06 05:16 PM
Response to Reply #29 |
32. She'll eat the banana while lying on her back on the table-scape |
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:rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl:
Sometimes, Rachael Ray and Giada will join her.
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Zomby Woof
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Thu Aug-10-06 05:42 PM
Response to Original message |
34. Cilantro belongs in salsa |
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NOT cole slaw. I used to grow the stuff, and you have to respect it.
What's next? Oregano on my mac 'n cheese? :grr:
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trof
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Thu Aug-10-06 06:22 PM
Response to Original message |
38. Scientific tortillas. GO ALTON! |
GOPisEvil
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Thu Aug-10-06 06:22 PM
Response to Reply #38 |
trof
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Thu Aug-10-06 06:24 PM
Response to Reply #39 |
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Took me a while to get used to his style.
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GOPisEvil
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Thu Aug-10-06 06:25 PM
Response to Reply #40 |
41. I've been a geek about things my whole life. |
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I've liked his sense of humor and goofiness since the beginning.
If you've just GOTTA have mac and cheese in a hurry, his stove-top version is quick and tasty.
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Sanity Claws
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Thu Aug-10-06 07:03 PM
Response to Original message |
42. Why is an apricot running up the stairs? |
6000eliot
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Thu Aug-10-06 07:29 PM
Response to Original message |
44. Cilantro is an evil weed grown by Satan in HELL! |
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Edited on Thu Aug-10-06 07:30 PM by 6000eliot
That is all.
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Arugula Latte
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Thu Aug-10-06 08:09 PM
Response to Original message |
45. OMG! i lOvE CILaNtro!!ll!! I'ts HUGH!!ll1l11ll11!! |
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:9 :9 :9
But Sandra Lee? She sucks like a Dyson! She probably doesn't know how to use Mediterranean sea salts in her semi-homemade crap!
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marzipanni
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Thu Aug-10-06 08:10 PM
Response to Original message |
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It seems that many have a passionate distaste for it- ;) http://www.ihatecilantro.com/taste.php
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