Does it bother you to watch someone flirt with your spouse/SO?

[LaraMN]

It doesn't bother me at all. In fact, I rather find it both hot and hilarious; hilarious because my husband looks SO uncomfortable when women try to talk to him, and hot, because it just reminds me of the fact that my husband is attractive to other women, but he's ALL mine! What are your feelings in that type of situation?

[Commie Pinko Dirtbag]

1. I feel almost the exact same way. Ditto for Mrs. Dirtpurse. -nt

[LaraMN]

2. Good! Then I'm not weird and perverse!

Or we all are!:toast:

[Commie Pinko Dirtbag]

21. I tried to register "Commie Weirdo Pinko Pervert Dirtbag"

but there's a size limit. :(

[LeftyMom]

3. I think it's funny as hell

If I couldn't stand to see people flirt with by boyfriend I'd have to find one who wasn't so damned hot. Needless to say, I'd rather not. ;)

[SOteric]

4. Almost exactly the same.

He gets a lot of straight female and gay male appreciation and I enjoy it. But I acknowledge there's one person whose attention to him is unsettling to me. Not because I feel our relationship threatened, but rather because she's got a history of having betrayed me emotionally and a tendency to behave in oily ways.

[Midlodemocrat]

38. I DIDN"T DO ANY OF THAT!!!!!

:hide:

[SOteric]

42. Hah!

You're a short-skirted tart, just like your buddy matcom!

[Midlodemocrat]

44. .

:rofl:

:loveya:

[idgiehkt]

5. it bothers me if my s.o flirts back.

or if the behavior keeps on and keeps on my s.o. doesnt' discourage it. Honestly I have to say that I do think it's disrespectful to flirt with someone if you know there spouse or lover is standing right there. If they don't know, it's one thing, but if they know and keep on doing it they are setting themselves up for trouble.

[ForrestGump]

6. Kind of ambivalent, I guess. I didn't fly into a jealous rage, but I

didn't think it was especially cute, either -- a lot depends, I suppose, on how it's done (sleazemeisters are just plain repugnant no matter what the context).

I was kind of perturbed when she cheated on me, again and again, though...

[Deja Q]

7. No spouse. No SO. No problem. But I won't say "no hope".

Not yet.

Not that I flirt in public anyway.

[Iniquitous Bunny]

8. Not really.

I'm not the jealous type. There is absolutely nothing any woman could give my partner that I could not. The same in regard to him with me.

Besides, I think people who knowingly flirt in excess with people who are otherwise in a committed relationships (especially those who are married) on an ongoing basis lack the ethics that speak to what kind of person they are. Those kind of people speak for themselves with regard to their own slimy behavior.

[idgiehkt]

10. where were you when I was having this problem?

"Besides, I think people who knowingly flirt in excess with people who are otherwise in a committed relationships (especially those who are married) on an ongoing basis lack the ethics that speak to what kind of person they are. Those kind of people speak for themselves with regard to their own slimy behavior."

I talk and I talk and I talk...I don't know how many different versions of the above I must have said but it never did any good. In my case me and my S.O. worked together and this interloper also worked with us and she did just about everything she could to cause trouble, even though she also was in a relationship. I even asked my ex just to forget about all the jealousy and stuff and think about how stressful it was for me to be messed with on my job like that. This situation caused so much trouble that we eventually did break up, and right after that I had a tryst at work with someone somewhat younger than me, which my ex still to this day throws in my face. I mean, literally, I just wrote her a letter a few weeks ago explaining *again* that when that happened I was *single* because we had broken up because of interference in our relationship by her many suitors. She had a nasty cocaine relapse after that and blames this and her losing her job (and getting pleuresy because of c-o-k-e) on me, not on her own behavior. It's stunning, really. I guess it's a 'what kind of person' question all around, including what kind of person was I to put up with it...

[Iniquitous Bunny]

14. I'm sorry about your experience.

I don't say what I said because I'm some pure, perfect person. Hardly. I've done stupid things myself and I'm slowly learning to forgive myself. It's not something I want to go into.

If people are just having fun and being silly or are polyamourous, all is cool. It's just when you know people are going behind people's backs in ways they shouldn't over and over, it's just sick. If people can't have honest relationships (on mutually agreed upon terms), they need to do the right thing and end it. Flirting can lead down dangerous paths and people can get hurt in very real ways.

[idgiehkt]

18. It's just nice to hear someone express that

this woman wasn't flirting, she was pathological. She wasn't trying to flirt, she was trying to hurt me, and I did directly confront her a couple of times at work, which could have cost me my job. The most response I could get out of my ex about this was she would laugh about it and say "She (the hussy) doesn't know who she's messing with" (meaning me). It kind of amused her, I think. People vary, obviously, as these thread responses show. I know people are going to flirt; because of this I'd say geez, do it behind my back. When you are doing it in my face that's an affront to me. But then I guess it goes to how secure you are in the relationship. If you know that the person adores you and wouldn't cheat (which is how I've felt about all the men I've been involved seriously with), then I can understand it. Women are a different story for some reason, I've never felt that secure when I've been involved with a woman; I don't know if it's my choices or what, lol. But I did have an argument with a male friend of mine several years ago when I made the statement that I had never been cheated on by a man. He argued rather vehemently that ALL men cheat and ALL men lie, and that I had, in fact, been cheated on by these men I was involved with whether I wanted to accept it or not, because every man will cheat if he has the opportunity. I didn't really know what to say, because he's a male and I'm not and therefore had more authority on the topic of maleness...it did kind of rearrange my mental furniture a bit, lol.

[eyesroll]

9. It only grosses me out when he flirts with whoisalhedges.

(And that only grosses me out, well, due to context.:scared:)

Otherwise, if I was offended by my SO flirting with other people, that would be a message that I picked the wrong SO, because he is a terrible flirt.

It amuses me.

[dolo amber]

26. Context, and the fact that it's gross

x(

[Magrittes Pipe]

27. Oh, honey, it's just silliness.

You know I'd never cheat on you with J. :hug:

[dolo amber]

28. The thought of that is secondary

You two are just disgusting. :P

[Magrittes Pipe]

31. You're disgusting.

:eyes:

[bicentennial_baby]

11. Nope

I love it...As long as people are not overly crude, it's a-ok with me :)

[YellowRubberDuckie]

12. Just depends.

Some of the girls who flirt with him are trashy and really WANT to get into his pants. But then there are the silly girls who are just flirting. I like the latter.
Duckie

[Broken_Hero]

13. I really don't

care, and most of the time, I'm to dumb to notice if someone is hitting on my wife...same with me, i'm totally clueless when women are hitting on me, but I know for a fact, that when women do flirt with me, my wife gets really upset...we just had a talk about this about ten days ago...

I had no idea she was that upset over women talking to me, i'm talking women from a few years ago, that still sorta grate on her nerves...

[skygazer]

15. Mostly, I enjoy it

He's a sweetheart and loves women and he's also hot. Most of the women who flirt with him are my friends and he always makes them feel sexy and special which is a boost to anyone's ego. The only times it kind of irritates me is when someone is aggressively flirting with him without regard to the fact that he's in a committed relationship - there's a difference between fun flirting and that type that really does want to pull off some kind of a coup. It doesn't make me irritated at him - though he's usually clueless about what's going on - but it does make me rather despise her.

[matcom]

16. I SOOOOO want to do your husband!

now, how does that make YOU feel? :P

don't tell Mrs Matcom k? :rofl:

[LaraMN]

17. Okay, this is an instance where the "hot" aspect becomes void.

:scared:

However, the "hilarious" one still stands.

[NewJeffCT]

19. doesn't bother me at all

If a guy flirts with you, does it bother your hubby?

[GoddessOfGuinness]

20. It used to.

Somewhere along the line I stopped caring.

[ScreamingMeemie]

22. It depends on the person.

If I know the person, it's kind of funny because MrG gets really embarassed when people flirt with them. But when I don't know the person and they go overboard (i.e. putting her feet in my husband's lap...rubbing his shoulders) I get irritated. Not at him, but at her for her obvious lack of respect for me. :hi:

[NewWaveChick1981]

23. If women flirt with my husband, it doesn't bother me---but...

...it DOES bother me if I'm there and they treat me rudely. He looks like a beefed-up, taller version of Stephen King, which he hears about all the time. I just had to laugh at one rude bimbo about ten years ago----she tried to carry on an entire conversation with him with her back to me, fully aware that I was married to him. (This was at a comic/science fiction convention, and he was a guest.) He kept trying to get away from her but couldn't. She even touched his hand at one point. She was apparently one of his groupies. :rofl: I didn't help him out, because I wanted to see how he handled it. Finally, he got frustrated enough and stopped her in mid-sentence and said, "I have somewhere else to be. Nice to meet you." And he took off! He left her there, standing in front of me, and she turned around and looked at me. She was beet red, and I just smiled at her and said, "He's not the kind of guy who cheats on his wife." All the color drained from her face, and she took off in the opposite direction. :rofl: We didn't see her the rest of the show.

It bothered me when my first serious boyfriend got that kind of attention, because he flirted right back most of the time and followed through with it on many occasions. :( Made me feel like a second-class citizen.

[swimboy]

37. That is a cinematically great story

I saw the whole thing as I read it! :thumbsup:

[xchrom]

24. nah -- i'm not jealous.

and for pillow talk -- i like to here about other romps he has had.

i find it very erotic.

[hunter]

25. First I am dense, and I don't notice, and then when I do it's funny.

My wife flirts, and I flirt.

If I was bothered I would be crazy.

Trust is the big issue.

My wife and I joke about it, but I'll be asleep, dreaming that I'm in bed with some woman I knew in college maybe, and suddenly I'll realize with a start, "Hey! You're not my wife!" and then I'll wake up. What's the matter with me, I can't even dream about being unfaithful?

[jpgray]

29. Doesn't bother me, but it's neither hot nor hilarious

I would call it... normal. It's perfectly natural that someone would be interested, and there's nothing wrong with expressing that interest via flirting. Unless it's really vulgar, or sleazy. Which would be both hot and hilarious. :D

[Magrittes Pipe]

30. I am a shameless flirt. And my wife is even MORE flirtatious than me.

Flirting is flirting. Sometimes people with self-esteem problems (reporting as ordered :hi:) get it confused with something else, but if they're smart and value their relationships (reporting as ordered :hi:) they figure out real quick that a flirt is just a flirt, and nothing to get worked up over.

See, my wife is not only a flirt, she's also hot. She gets flirted with. I'd be deep in the cold, cold ground by now if I let it get me too bent out of shape. ;)

[Divameow77]

32. I have a line

and it better not get crossed x(

[Missy Vixen]

33. I don't like it when it's blatant

There have been several women over the years that have made it clear they wouldn't kick my DH out of bed for eating crackers, and they all knew he was married. He is oblivious to it. I understand he's not encouraging the attention. He travels a lot for business; if they're this blatant when they know I'm standing there, what are they like when I'm not?

Julie

[GalleryGod]

34. Weird & Perverse ?

Only YOU know the truthful answer to that.
When you've done your first Menage A Trois..come back to us.:evilgrin: :evilfrown: :evilgrin:

Now THAT'S Spousal FUN !!!!!!!!

[Pierre.Suave]

35. I have no

SO, so no problem...

[El Fuego]

36. It pisses me off if they do it in front of me.

It's a show of in-your-face disrespect.

[HEyHEY]

39. On Saturday I went to an interesting play

It was about a cabaret and during the scenes the actors not involved would interact with audience members.
A woman playing a prostitute came up to me and sat on my lap and began to flirt with me...as part of the act... but having a scantily clad woman sitting on my lap in front of my girlfriend... even though it was in fun... had to be the most uncomfortable and confusing thing I've dealt with in a long time.

[mad-mommy]

40. I think it's funny, because of the way he responds

[astonamous]

41. Being from Utah...it's normal and expected.

:sarcasm:

Trudy
www.pryorsplanet.com

[graywarrior]

43. No. Mr. Gray is hot.

[Generic Brad]

45. People flirt?

I am so missing out on life.

[KamaAina]

46. Not in the least.

I suppose the fact that I haven't had an SO since the phrase "President Bush" had meaning might have something to do with that...

[sendero]

47. Yes..

.. I am insanely jealous as I should be. Fortunately for me, my wife sees it as a sign of how much I treasure her, as she should :)

[NNadir]

48. No. When we were young, people hit on my wife continuously.

We used to get letters and visits from old boyfriends.

If I'd been weird about that sort of thing, I would have never been able to enjoy her. It went with the territory.

I never had reason to doubt my wife's love for me. I trust I never will.