How are you going to die?? Find out here!

[The Straight Story]

http://www.thedeathpsychic.com/

Mine said:


While watching whales in a observation area of the aquarium, a suicidal maniac shoots the glass wall of the tank with a shotgun. Four million gallons of water quickly rush out of the tank and into the hallway, drowning you (and everyone else around).

[Haole Girl]

1. Thanks, but no thanks...

I don't need any new phobias!

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

2. Mine is so boring...

While driving too fast in icy conditions, you run a red light, and your car is struck in the intersection by a speeding truck. You are killed instantly.

[Oeditpus Rex]

3. Let it be told...

"While in a hotel pool, you are trapped underwater by the powerful suction of the pool's pump, and you drown to death."

That happened to a kid here about 10 years ago. Public pool, though. It's been closed ever since.



But... "drown to death"? :wtf:

[texanwitch]

4. This is spooky.

Mine said "You are mauled to death by a rapid pitbull"

I almost was, by two pitbulls.:scared:

[MrCoffee]

15. Rapid pitbulls are the worst...you never see 'em coming.

[Critters2]

31. Yep, it's the fast ones ya gotta watch! nt

[marzipanni]

5. Mine says: You humiliate a magician at a party

by divulging a few of his secrets. He returns the favor by actually sawing you in half.
I tried it twice-the same result the second time.

[Robeson]

6. A ceiling fan is going to fall on my head and decapitate me...

...said it will be a clean cut, though.

[rug]

7. Death by snicker. Sadly apropos.

An amputee overhears you as you snicker and make jokes about him. Enraged, he beats you to death with his prosthetic leg.

[AussieDave]

8. Death by escalator

Mine says "While walking up an escalator, your shoelace gets caught in the moving stairs, and you are dragged all the way to the top. You die from internal injuries."

I hope that unless I'm 102 and totally senile, I'd have enough sense to rip the offending shoe off BEFORE I get dragged all the way to the top.

Sheesh.

[Deja Q]

9. I'll have a heart attack while making sweet, sweet love.

Because I've not done it in ages and the excitement got to me. :spray:

[Random_Australian]

10. What Bull! Mine was not funny at all!

"As the unfortunate target of a serial killer, you're beaten and tortured for days. While you're still alive, your body is put into a meat grinder and ground up."

[bigwillq]

11. Here's mine:

In a case of mistaken identity, you are shot to death by a drug dealer.

[auntAgonist]

12. Let it be told..

After an altercation with a resident of a retirement community, you are beaten with an oxygen tank and dragged through the complex by a convoy of personal mobility vehicles.


:cry:

aA

[Seabiscuit]

13. Let it be told:

"Pat Robertson smites you with his bible after he hears you say the word "damn". You die of a concussion."

[Katina]

14. mauled by a rabid pit bull! Is that what I get for not being a dog fan?

Yikes!

[LeftyMom]

16. Well, at least it's unique

As the unfortunate target of a serial killer, a rubber innertube is stuffed into your mouth and fully inflated, causing your head to explode.

[nosillies]

17. Mine...

A disgruntled employee in a sporting goods store beats you to death with a hockey stick.

And I was seriously daydreaming about a trip to Canada recently. I guess I'll just stay in the south, where hockey sticks aren't as readily found.

[bicentennial_baby]

18. As if!

I'm nevah gonna off myself, especially with sleeping pills....How lame to go out like that :eyes:

[joneschick]

19. ......

A tormented street mime beats you to death with an "unimaginary" cane.

[MrCoffee]

20. Let It Be Told...

You are electrocuted while attempting to rewire some light fixtures in your home.

[JackBeck]

29. Looks like we're going out the same way, MrCoffee.

What's scary is that I can see this happening to me.

[deucemagnet]

21. Let it be told...

"While in a hardware store, a strange man picks up an axe and attacks you with it, dismembering your body."

I'll bet it's a Walmart. Fucking Walmart.

[Fuzz]

50. That was mine too!

Let's shop together, we'll make the news for sure! :D

[deucemagnet]

58. lol! We can watch each other's backs while we buy...

...drywall studs and spackle. :rofl:

[NNadir]

22. Wow, it seems so likely too.

During a routine haircut, your stylist violently sneezes and inadvertently stabs you in the neck with a pair of scissors, severing your carotid artery.

[FedUpWithIt All]

23. Damn, nothing exciting here...

You slip in the shower and hit your head. You die from being broiled by the 110 degree water for several hours. But hey, at least you're clean!

[leftofthedial]

24. this already happened to me

except I survived.

While using a chainsaw to help your friend cut down a tree, you slip and sever your leg. You die from rapid blood loss.

[Critters2]

33. You've died from rapid blood loss?

So there is something to that reincarnation stuff after all. But for it to happen twice--what are the odds?!

[leftofthedial]

48. "except I survived"

one also must stretch the word "friend" to include my ex-wife

[crim son]

25. Geez, this is bad:

"A deranged homeless man climbs over the dividing wall of a department store dressing room and strangles you to death with a clothes hanger." LOL.

[Fleshdancer]

26. While standing in line at the fast food joint.....

While standing in line at a fast food joint, you take too much time deliberating on your order. A very hungry, very crazy man approaches you from behind and takes a large bite out of your neck. You quickly bleed to death.


:rofl:

[graywarrior]

27. How fucking appropriate.

A group of disgruntled coworkers duct tapes you to a wall and uses you as a human dartboard. You die from agonizingly slow blood loss caused by hundreds of puncture wounds.

[Robb]

28. My next door neighbor beats me to death with a shovel.

Nice way to shovel off this mortal coil. :D

[caty]

30. I'll never go into a bank again.

Just drive thru for me!

You are taken hostage as part of a bank robbery. When law enforcement refuses to meet the demands of the suspect, the suspect shoots you in the head to prove to the cops that he means business.


Violent much?
:scared: :cry: :scared:

[6000eliot]

32. Here it is:

During a severe storm, a tree falls onto your house, crushing and killing you.

[Critters2]

34. I'm the victim of terra, terra, terra!

While you're having lunch at an outdoor cafe, a suicide bomber blows himself up next to you.

[The Straight Story]

35. We need to make one of these for bush and crew

Click on it and find out the next lie you will be told by them :)

[u4ic]

40. Me, too!

:scared:

Considering it's winter 10 months of the year here, though, I think I should be pretty safe. ;-)

[Critters2]

41. I'm just planning to eat indoors. nt

[The Straight Story]

59. I tried on bush - and it said:

The Death Psychic does not get involved in matters of politics.

Losers.

[Mutley]

36. Wow, this sucks, but at least it's cool.

:rofl:

"While you're leaning forward to smell a pot of cooking soup, a disgruntled relative shoves your head into the pot and holds it there. Your face is quickly cooked as you choke to death on boiling hot soup."

[Critters2]

37. If I were you,

I'd be careful not to disgruntle any relatives.

[Mutley]

39. I think most of my relatives are pretty disgruntled with me right now.

It'd be easier just to stay away from boiling soup. :P

[Fox Mulder]

38. I always knew it would end this way:

After swallowing several capsules which you thought were pain relievers, you're told that you were given "foam animal in a capsule" capsules as a joke. The foam animals expand to twenty times their original size, causing a major intestinal obstruction. Unable to pass solid waste, you die from self-toxification.

[Critters2]

42. Ewwww...

Makes my outdoor cafe bomber look like pretty good!

[Solon]

43. This is different...

You are blown to smithereens when your fun loving co-worker fills a whoopee cushion with nitroglycerin.

The funny thing is that I'm the one more likely to have thought of doing that to a co-worker, now I have to watch where I sit NOW!

[Solon]

44. OK, now I put in my FULL name(First, Middle, Last name), and this came up.

You die of a massive heart attack during extremely wild sex, only seconds before orgasm.

For some reason, I like this one better. ;)

[Blue_In_AK]

45. You are bitten while tormenting a sickly-looking squirrel.

You die from rabies days later.

Yikes - I guess I should be afraid.

[xchrom]

46. those who have me on ignore should be comforted:

As the unfortunate target of a serial killer, your face is skinned using steel wool and subsequently doused with bleach. While you're still alive, your face is then doused with ammonia. The bleach and ammonia chemically react and melt the remaining flesh from your skull.


:yoiks:

[bridgit]

49. pft, good one...

:spray: i was either going to fall into a pool of human eating koi, or be beaten to death by a mime with a imaginary cane

either fate would further lend my detractors their ill placed sense of entitlement as well :hi:

[xchrom]

52. oh dear -- a mime?!?!

your detractors will be more satisfied than mine, i'm afraid.

i think a dog trained to kill mimes is in order for your constant companion -- one shouldn't give their detractors that much satisfaction.
:mad:

[Godhumor]

47. I win!

"You die in your sleep from old age. (Boring, ain't it?)"

That's right--I manage to not kill myself in some horribly stupid way.

[gr8dane_daddy]

51. According to the site....

While playing baseball, a disgruntled player beats you to death with a bat.


Inaccurate as hell, I hate baseball.

[DeposeTheBoyKing]

53. Someone is going to bash me to death with a baseball bat

During a tense baseball game. NOT BLOODY LIKELY!

[Lavender Brown]

54. At least I'm going to live past retirement age...

....
After an altercation with a resident of a retirement community, you are beaten with an oxygen tank and dragged through the complex by a convoy of personal mobility vehicles.

[terrya]

55. Mine is really messy:

Being depressed with life in general, you commit suicide by cutting your throat with a hacksaw.

[Pool Hall Ace]

56. ravaged by a pack of wild dingoes

while touring the Australian outback. Hmm.

:yoiks:

[XNASA]

57. Chinese cook attacks me with a cleaver.

"A deranged cook at a Chinese restaurant attacks you violently with a meat cleaver after you complain about your meal."

[qnr]

60. Same as everyone else that has ever died. Lack of oxygen to the brain

According to that site though, someone is going to crash a plane I'm on, killing everyone.

[sakabatou]

61. Let's see here...

Nick-name: An ex-friend beats you to death with a full gallon of paint.
Full first name: A disgruntled cook at the local bar and grill poisons your food. You suffer in agony for days until the poison eventually kills you.
Full name: While attempting to climb a barbed wire fence, you lose your grip and fall, slicing your neck in several areas. You bleed to death slowly.

[Broken_Hero]

62. according to my doctor

1. A stroke

2. Heart Attack

3. Diabetes

4. All of the above at the same time


But, I believe...one of these will do me in...

1. Car accident

2. Getting shot on accident, because someone mistakes me for a deer

[shanti]

63. wow, scary

"You suffer a massive heart attack while home alone. You collapse to the ground, only to be found dead hours later." pretty boring compared to some of you all!

this actually is a very real fear of mine. :scared:

[Broken_Hero]

64. sorry...

I didn't even take the test...:)

[SofaKingLiberal]

65. Maybe I should become a vegan.

After haggling over the price of meat, an enraged butcher beats you to death with a frozen beef tongue.

[Guava Jelly]

66. damn i need to stay away from escalators

While walking up an escalator, your shoelace gets caught in the moving stairs, and you are dragged all the way to the top. You die from internal injuries.

[meegbear]

67. My next door neighbor beats me to death with a shovel ...

that sounds about right.

[TK421]

68. I'll be beaten to death by thugs in a dark alley

:eyes: I say bring it!