I am a fool,

[murielm99]

a damn fool.

I was going to my fortieth high school reunion, but I changed my mind. So tonight, I got a call from one of the women on the planning committee. I told her that I am not going, because my Grave's disease is causing me problems. It is true. The medication has caused me to gain 22 lbs. in two months. The weight just sits there. Nothing I do will make it go away. Granted, the other symptoms are much better. I am happy about that. But I can't stand my appearance, and none of my clothes fit. I don't feel comfortable in some social situations, so I avoid them.

It is true that there are some emotional roller coaster moments with this stupid illness. But let me be honest. I was always vain about my trim figure. I am a vain 58-year-old woman.

I was never as popular as the woman who called me tonight. We were not good friends. But we were nice to each other when we were together. I did have lots of friends. I enjoyed high school, and I enjoy the reunions. (I understand that that is considered somewhat abnormal, LOL). She told me, and I know that it is true, that the people who will be there value me for who I am, not what I look like.

Anyway, she kept begging me to come. I told her that I was not going anywhere while I was fat. She told me that lots of people were having problems, and we are all getting older. Finally, she told me that she wants to see everyone she can at this reunion, because it may be the last time she sees some of us. She has cancer.

I am a fool. I am a vain damn fool.

[crim son]

1. I don't know what to say.

But the lesson to be learned is not that you are a vain damn fool, but that you are not alone in your suffering. :hug:

[IsIt1984Yet]

2. So... are you going? When is it?

[Haole Girl]

3. I bet if you went you'd enjoy it

End of lecture! :hug:

[sendero]

4. You're choking me up..

... but you are right. You're being foolish.

That said, we are all foolish from time to time, so don't lose sleep over it.

[skygazer]

5. Life's lessons

I guess we never stop learning them. You're not a fool - you're just human. :hug:

I hope you go....

[IsIt1984Yet]

8. I hope you go, too. And be extremely joyous knowing that you have the

chance. And that you found out this bit of reality before missing it.

[ScreamingMeemie]

6. You are a mere mortal...Insecurities and all.

As is she. :hug: I hope all turns out well...for you both.

[Quakerfriend]

7. Dear Muriel,

You should not go, if you don't feel well. You will all see each other on the other side.

[reyd reid reed]

9. Nah...you're not a fool

You're human. Have you re-thought your decision to skip the reunion?

[murielm99]

10. I am going to the reunion.

But I only told you half of my foolishness.

I have another friend, who never went to the reunions. She was kind of bitter, after all these years, because her mother had pushed her in high school. Her mother wanted her to be a cheerleader and the homecoming queen and all that. She never did that stuff, because she was not the type, and hated all that. She was a great person, who blossomed in her junior and senior years, and enjoyed herself. She had many friends. She was a good student who became a teacher, had a family, and married a good guy.

I told her to get over it, and come to some of the reunions. Her friends wanted to see her. She took my advice, and is on the planning committee this year. I was going to ignore the good advice I gave her, and hide at home.

I will be there.

[reyd reid reed]

11. Excellent!!!

:hug:

I'm so glad!!!

:hug: