proactive self-starters . . . CHECK IN!!!!!!

[datasuspect]

anyone up for changing some paradigms and leveraging skill sets to ensure beneficial outcomes for internal and external constituencies?

who wants to be an engine of focus for the vagaries of emerging markets in the new global marketplace?

non-team players need not apply.

[madinmaryland]

1. Freeperized:

ANYONE UP FOR CHANGNG SOM3 PARADIGMS AND LAV3RAGNG SKIL SETS 2 ANSURE BNAFICIAL OUTCOM3S FOR INTERNAL AND AXTERNAL CONSTITUENCEIS

WHO?!??!! LOL WANTS 2 B AN ENGIEN OF FOCUS FOR TEH VAGAREIS OF 3MERGNG MARKETS IN TEH NU GLOBAL MARK3TPLAEC

NON-TAM???!!? OMG WTF LOL PLAEYRS NED NOT APLEY!!!!!11! OMG WTF LOL

:rofl:

[datasuspect]

2. i thought freepers eschew profanity?

that was pretty funny anyhow!!!!

[ScreamingMeemie]

3. I'm still having trouble thinking outside the box...

I guess that leaves me out. :hi:

[datasuspect]

4. we need you to buy in

and get some skin in the game. this will aggregate your net deliverables over the long game, then all we do is spike the ball!

go state!!!!

-chet "the kegmeister" paddington, state u. alumnus, now a mid-level manager at a major corporation.

[querelle]

5. Bullshit Bingo

Do you keep falling asleep in staff meetings?

What about those long and boring conference calls?
Here's a way to change all of that:


1. Before (or during) your next meeting, seminar, or conference call, prepare your "Bullshit Bingo" card by drawing a square -- I find that 5" x 5" is a good size -- and dividing it into columns --five across and five down. That will give you 25 1-inch blocks.



2. Write one of the following words/phrases in each block:

Synergy
Strategic fit
Core competencies
Turbulent environment
Out of the box
Pushback
Bottom line
Revisit
Take that off-line
24/7
Out of the loop
Benchmark
Value-added
Proactive
Bandwidth
Win-win
Think outside the box
Fast track
Results-driven
Paradigm
Empower (or empowerment)
Knowledge base
At the end of the day
Touch base
Mindset
Client focus(ed) or Customer focus(ed)
Ballpark
Game plan
Scenario
Leverage
Cascade
Sequential or sequentially


3. Check off the appropriate block when you hear one of those words/phrases.



4. When you get five blocks horizontally, vertically, or diagonally, stand up and shout "BULLSHIT!"

[southpaw]

6. Abso-effing-lutely

I have an ever evolving list of words that I call 'Bullshit Indicators'

Whenever some stuffed shirt spits one out, I know he/she is full of shit.

'paradigm' is and likely will remain at the top of the list.

[mad-mommy]

8. lol, funny

[1gobluedem]

7. I've been trying to grow the vertical

But my silo is too restrictive and prohibits pushing the envelope.

[datasuspect]

9. you need to reaffirm your core principles

this will help to clarify the mission of the enterprise, thereby horizontalizing deliverable streams in the direction of net efficiency.

[jpgray]

10. Touch base with me later to see if we're on the same page

[datasuspect]

11. i'll have my assistant block out the time in my outlook

and we can revisit the new scenarios

[jpgray]

13. Sorry, my schedule calls for two weeks of self-actualization

[Bunny]

12. But only if we can lateralize client movement. Because we need laterality

I heard that several times yesterday, nearly went medieval. :puke:

[LynzM]

14. Oh lord....

I can't talk like that, even if I wanted to... but I hear plenty of it!