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LeftyMom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-07-06 07:22 PM
Original message
Okay, I need parent help.
My Dad has this crazy idea my sister and I (who are both college students) should go into nursing. He is absolutely hell-bent on it, forever talking up how much nurses can make, the demand for nurses, blah blah. Now he's perfectly aware neither of us have any desire to go into nursing and that we have perfectly good career plans that will keep shoes on our feet and roofs over our heads even if they aren't terribly lucrative (well, mine could be if I went corporate with it rather than non-profit) but that doesn't seem to be stopping him. I just had to put up with him reading me ads for nurses out of the classifieds for ten minutes, then telling me again about a nurse he knows who makes 90K a year at one of those on-call agencies (he never stops to think what I'd do with my kid if I worked on a last-minute basis like that.)

What can I do to get it through his head that I don't want to go into nursing, that my back and neck aren't up to the task, that it's not something I'd be good at and that a single mother really can't go into a field that requires such long and irregular hours in any case?

When he gets this driven about something and just won't listen to reason I start wondering if dementia is starting to set in, then I remember he's been this bossy and stubborn my whole life.
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mainegreen Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-07-06 07:25 PM
Response to Original message
1. Why not tell him about all the horrible incurable diseases that rampage
around nursing homes and hospitals? Like the new incurable TB strain? Just keep bringing these things up like "Oh guess what I read? There's this new disease they found in Hospital ERs that makes your face fall off!" and eventually he might decide it's not a good idea to go into nursing.
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LeftyMom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-07-06 07:48 PM
Response to Reply #1
10. I guess I could do that.
Oh, I know, I should remind him that nurses tend to be liberal and union! That'd shut him up, since he's waaaaaaaaaaaaay off on the right politically.
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crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-07-06 07:25 PM
Response to Original message
2. Tell him my father the doctor
says that nurses don't get the respect they deserve, and that they will have to take shit jobs for years before the benefits like a decent salary and choosing one's own hours kicks in.
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nini Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-07-06 07:26 PM
Response to Original message
3. Both of my sisters are nurses
If you don't want to do it there's NO WAY you'll be effective. It's demanding as hell, the insurance companies and hospital admins make it hellish with their demands etc. One sister is in employee health now and the other is in hospice. Neither of them could take the hospital hell.


It's good money, but it's also extremely stressful. It's not for everybody.

Follow your instincts and tell him it's just not for you. Good luck
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LaraMN Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-07-06 07:26 PM
Response to Original message
4. Hmmm.... can you tell him that you might not make a good nurse, because
you have a strong, intermittent and unpredictable desire to kill people?:P
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Blue-Jay Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-07-06 07:27 PM
Response to Reply #4
5. FTW!
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SammyWinstonJack Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-07-06 10:44 PM
Response to Reply #4
21. Yeah, her being a liberal and a vegetarian, that will work.
:eyes:
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Ariana Celeste Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-07-06 07:32 PM
Response to Original message
6. I would try saying something like,
"Well if the career I want doesn't work out for me down the road, nursing would be my next choice."

Fortunately for me though, my parents give up pretty easy. Good luck.
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mdmc Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-07-06 07:34 PM
Response to Original message
7. Tell him you are studying to be a nurse
Later, tell him that you are a supervisor of an on call nursing service.
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Mike03 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-07-06 07:41 PM
Response to Original message
8. A Couple of Ideas
Most importantly, you need to pursue the career you are passionate about. But remind him that:

1. Every father in the United States is now telling their daughters to go into nursing because there is a widespread perception that nurses are in short supply. The net result is that there will be a nursing glut in four years. This is exactly what happened in the 80s, when all fathers were telling their sons to go into business, and now all of those managers are unemployed.

You tell him that you want to "zig while others zag", which is the advice my dad gave me.

2. The Health Care industry is one of the most uncertain industries because it faces a real crisis.
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NightNurse Donating Member (222 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-07-06 08:28 PM
Response to Reply #8
11. Sorry,Mike..you couldn't be more wrong.
There are more than 30 nurses under my supervision who, earned (with overtime) closer to 95K than 50K. There will be no glut,because, we are nationally in a generation turnover.

Your friend,Leftymom, may "tell" her father that, it simply isn't true.
BTW, the median age of an RN in the State of California is 45 at this moment.
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GalleryGod Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-07-06 08:33 PM
Response to Reply #11
12. No surprise it took a "nursing" post to get you on DU, girl !

BTW....I've seen her pay stub,too. Allows me to be an underpaid member of the Halls of academe.

Love that woman. That's why I married her.

G'nite DU..working on my new screenplay:

"The Path to 9/11: Papa Joe Kennedy Did It !"

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CaliforniaPeggy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-07-06 07:41 PM
Response to Original message
9. My dear LeftyMom!
You just have to keep hammering back at him........

I was a nurse for over 20 years, and I can tell you that if you don't want to do it, then it's literally impossible.....

It is exceedingly stressful and you have to be on your toes all the time...

The money is good, but not worth it unless you enjoy doing the work...

Just keep at him........eventually, you hope he'll get the message...

:hi:
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Generic Brad Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-07-06 10:10 PM
Response to Original message
13. What is it with parents and career advice?
Mine tried to push me into a field I had no desire to pursue. I refused and got multiple degrees in things I loved to do. So I missed the gravy train. At least I'm doing what I love.

I'm taking a different track with my kid than my parents took with me. I want her to try many things, discover what interests her the most, and pursue it with every ounce of passion she has, and I will support her choice. I want my daughter to be happy with whatever vocation or career she chooses. I do not equate money with happiness.
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Floogeldy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-07-06 10:12 PM
Response to Original message
14. I'm glad to see that your father loves you very much.
:)
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bridgit Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-07-06 10:17 PM
Response to Original message
15. well yes, but the medical field is considered a growth industry...
Edited on Thu Sep-07-06 10:33 PM by bridgit
so far as i am able to reckon, you may not have to be 'a nurse', but surgical nurses as a for instance must surely have a challenging days work for a considered salary...may be 'a' way to go :thumbsup:
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Floogeldy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-07-06 10:19 PM
Response to Reply #15
16. Day Care, Night Care
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bridgit Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-07-06 10:24 PM
Response to Reply #16
17. don't forget shit-sacks...
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huskerlaw Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-07-06 10:27 PM
Response to Original message
18. I would check to make sure
that his stats on nurses are actually true in California.

I recently had one of those random conversations that you have when you start talking to the person sitting next to you on an airplane. She's a career counselor here in LA. She went ON and ON about how she gets TONS of recent nursing school grads who can't find jobs. She said that they all went to expensive nursing schools thinking that the job market was so open and they'd make tons of money and then when they went to find a job, couldn't even get interviews. Why? Because hospitals in SoCal (she specifically named Kaiser) were getting nurses from overseas.

May not be true up north, but if it is, you could shut his mouth in a hurry. ;)
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LeftyMom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-07-06 10:33 PM
Response to Reply #18
19. I tried telling him about the H1B thing.
Sometimes his mind is made up and he doesn't want to hear any facts.

I imagine that's true of Kaiser here too, seems like it's a real pain in the ass to get a doctor there, let alone a nurse, who doesn't have an unintelligibly thick accent.
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flvegan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-07-06 10:35 PM
Response to Original message
20. A vegan nurse...that'd be something to behold.
This really was my second choice.
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LeftyMom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-07-06 10:46 PM
Response to Reply #20
22. yeah, that's a big thing too
How the hell would I get around all of the injections, anatomy class disections and who knows what else? To say nothing of all the other shit I find offensive and objectionable? "Okay LM, today we're practicing neonatal circumcision" "Are you fucking nuts?" etc.
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flvegan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-07-06 10:54 PM
Response to Reply #22
23. Um, LeftyMom, we have this new drug
sworn in by the FDA after considerable testing by Huntingdon Life Sciences. Seems like a big plus. Go ahead and run an IV...
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LeftyMom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-07-06 10:58 PM
Response to Reply #23
24. See, we really don't need to give me a scalpel in these situations
"LM, it's time to ripen her cervix for the labor induction..." :grr: "so I need you to apply this prostaglandin gel" (that's pig semen, by the way) "internally." :nuke:

Yeah, definitely not the job for me.
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