did you hear about the drummer who locked his keys in his car?

[leftofthedial]

took him an hour to get the bass player out.

[Richard Steele]

1. Badum_bump!

[mainegreen]

2. *snort*

:rofl:

[buddhamama]

3. lol

:)

[BigMcLargehuge]

4. what's the difference between a drummer and a medium size cheese pizza?

a pizza can feed a family of four.

[Courtesy Flush]

6. What do you call a guy who hangs out with musicians?

A drummer!

[mitchum]

29. What do you call a guy who hangs out with blues musicians?

a harp player

[Rhiannon12866]

5. Thanks! I passed this one on!

:rofl:

Actually, I've heard it before, but that one was about a Polish guy and it was his family who was locked in... Since I'm Polish, I liked this one much better!:D

[mikeytherat]

7. A few more:

What's the best part about a drum solo?
It means the bass solo is over.

How many bass players does it take to play a solo?
Four. One to play the solo, and three to say, "Man, that's not how Jaco would've played it."
(alternate answer):
None. The keyboardist plays it with his left hand.

It's OK, I can take it:


mikey_the_rat

[leftofthedial]

14. there is a bass player

at the bottom of everything!

[anarch]

18. what's the difference between a bass and a trampoline?

you take your shoes off to jump on a trampoline.



(disclaimer: I also play the bass, so I'm allowed to tell that one :D)

[Wally101]

28. LOL

I've got a drummer friend AND a bass player friend...I'll have to use these on them this weekend.


mark

[tigereye]

8. booooo!

drummers are actually pretty smart, it's not easy to coordinate all those beats. ;)


:spank:

[nuxvomica]

9. What do you call a drummer who broke up with his girlfriend?

Homeless.

[buddhamama]

10. *snort*

:hi:

[leftofthedial]

24. yeah. drummers are notoriously intellectual

think Keith Moon and Ringo . . .

[ProfessorGAC]

11. Somewhere In The Archives. . .

. . . there is a Lounge thread that i started, strictly to do musician jokes. There was no musicians' group in those days, so all the musicians hung out in the Lounge. I want to say we got about 60 jokes on that thread.

There were some truly hilarious bits in that thread, so if you really want to find some funny musician jokes, check the archives. I started it, in the Lounge, and i'm guessing 2 years ago. That should give you a starting point for the search.

The Professor

[C_eh_N_eh_D_eh]

12. What's the difference between a drummer and a Dr. Sholl's pad?

One of them bucks up the feet.

[leftofthedial]

13. LOL

[KyndCulture]

15. How do you get a bass player off your porch?

pay him for the pizza.

[Deja Q]

16. So drummers are more intelligent than bass players?

(It took an hour, but one finally got the other out...)

[leftofthedial]

17. thank heaver, too

because the guitar player was still looking for a coat hanger.

if the window hadn't been rolled down, it might have taken longer.

[GoddessOfGuinness]

19. What's the difference between a bull and an orchestra?

On the bull, the horns are at the front, and the asshole's in back.

[leftofthedial]

20. zing!

[buddhamama]

21. lol

:rofl:

[Lautremont]

22. How do you know when a drummer's at your door?

The knocking gets slower.

[warrens]

23. How can you tell when the drum riser is level?

The drummer drools out of both sides of his mouth.

What did the drummer get on his SAT?

Drool

[av8rdave]

26. What does a bass player's girlfriend

do with her asshole before sex? She drops him off at practice!

(my son plays bass - that's my excuse for that one!)

[proud2BlibKansan]

25. I am married to a drummer!

And I find this joke pretty damn funny.

[Blue-Jay]

27. The difference between a dead skunk & a dead drummer in the road?

The skunk was on his way to a gig.