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driver8 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-18-06 01:37 AM
Original message
Any cancer survivors in the lounge?
The reason I'm asking is that I found out yesterday that my father has cancer. He has been dealing with cancer of the bladder for the past year. He went in for a check-up and some tests and they found a spot on his lungs and on his liver. He meets with the oncologist on Wednesday to see how they are going to treat this.

My mom is a retired RN and she said the good thing is that there is no sign of cancer in his bones, his blood or in his brain. I am having a hard time wrapping my mind around this. I am 43 years old and I can count on one hand the number of times my father has been sick. He is 69 years old and weighs 3 pounds more than he did when he graduated high school. He has always been in great shape and great health.

My father and I have had our differences in the past -- I wasn't the easiest kid to deal with. However, the past few years we have grown closer and have finally been able to talk to one another about our issues and problems. My father and mother visited my family and I this past summer (I am in CA, he is in NY) and it was the best time I can remember having with my father in a long, long time.

I guess I need some positive stories from cancer survivors to give me some hope. I am feeling like shit right now...my Dad and I have so much left to talk about. Not only that, but my children absolutely adore him.

He is a tough and stubborn SOB, and I know he will fight this with all he's got. Please say a prayer for my father.
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driver8 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-18-06 05:04 AM
Response to Original message
1. kick
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ScreamingMeemie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-18-06 05:09 AM
Response to Original message
2. While I am not a survivor myself, my father just fought kidney cancer
and he appears to be winning. They thought they would have to take his kidney and he didn't want that. They were able to operate and save his kidney.

The whole situation made me realize just how much my father has added to my life.

I will think good thoughts for you driver, that your father has the positive (so far) outcome that my father has had. We all need our Dads. :hug:
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Guava Jelly Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-18-06 05:11 AM
Response to Original message
3. Luckily I havent had cancer
I know a really nice breast cancer survivor who Is cancer free as we speak (and kept her breast)
All i can say is I hope everything works out for him.
And your Mom sounds like a smart Lady.
Listen to her.Worry about the negative only if it happens.
And Rejoice in the positives if and when it happens.
And tell him you love him Often!!!
:hug:
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REP Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-18-06 05:53 AM
Response to Original message
4. My Cancer Was Rather Undrastic
It was just Level 1 and it was taken care of without removing anything I wanted.

My father had bladder cancer with a bone mets, so I know what you're going through. Best wishes.
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xchrom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-18-06 06:20 AM
Response to Original message
5. i'm vibing good love for your dad.
i survived skin cancer treatments -- and live with the idea it can come back any time.

it's really not easy because you are very sick.

but you get up and go on -- because you have to.

plus -- while it's not cancer -- i am my fathers care taker -- i mean his body is my body -- i do everything for him right now -- as he takes his leave of this world and his family.

again -- you survive -- you go on -- because you must.

there really are times when love is every thing --

peace be with you and your family at this time.
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ulysses Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-18-06 06:37 AM
Response to Original message
6. hi.
There are quite a few of us around, actually. :)

Cancer doesn't care much what kind of shape you've been in previously. As my old oncologist put it to me a couple of years back, "Live long enough and you *will* get cancer". That said, it sounds like he's got a good outlook. Tell him to keep up the good fight. We'll keep him and your family in our thoughts.
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LynzM Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-18-06 08:11 AM
Response to Original message
7. I'm not a cancer survivor...
But I wanted to reply and send lots of love and hugs and good wishes to you and especially to your dad :hug: I will keep you guys in my thoughts.
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NewWaveChick1981 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-18-06 08:16 AM
Response to Original message
8. Wow, driver8...I'm sorry...
Edited on Mon Sep-18-06 08:20 AM by NewWaveChick1981
:hug: I am not a cancer survivor myself, but my mother is a 9-year colon cancer survivor. She underwent surgery in the nick of time (she was in Stage IIA), and although her recovery took a long time, she's a fighter and was back on her feet as soon as she could be. She underwent chemo for about a year afterward. Her most recent colonoscopy in May showed no signs of recurrence.

Just make the most of things with your dad and give him as much moral support as you can. :hug: I'm sending my thoughts and good wishes for you, your dad, and the rest of your family. :pals:
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driver8 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-18-06 05:26 PM
Response to Original message
9. Thank you everyone, for your kind words, thoughts and prayers.
DU'ers are the best!
I appreciate it.
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Tripper11 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-18-06 05:57 PM
Response to Original message
10. I am a survivor
First and foremost I wish nothing but a positive successful outcome for your father driver8.

As for my story...I was diagnosed with AML(Acute Myloid Leukemia) 4 years ago this past July. I spent 8 weeks in the hospital for my initial treatment. One week on chemo, and the next 7 waiting for my blood counts to come back.
My AML went into immediate remission. After my 2 month hospital stay I was sent back for a few consolidation treatments.
During this time, I had a major decision to make. To transplant or not to transplant. I discussed this with my Oncologist at length. My problem(if you want to call it that) was that there was no indicators saying whether to transplant or not.
Cancer in full remission, but could, COULD come back. Chromosomes had no indicators(apparently they can sort of show possible return of AML)
My worry was the possible side effects of the transplant. Nasty shit, scary shit...scary enough to consider not transplanting.
In the end I decided to do a transplant(stem cell by the way) My brother was a perfect match.
Went back in the hospital in late November, got all chemo'd up again(gotta knock down the immune system to almost kill it to make a new one you see)
In walks the nurse with a bag of lovely milky white stem cells and pumped them into my system.
Very minimal side effects over time. At this point the only physical remnant are dry eyes. I have permanent red eyes that I have to put drops in every so often(small price to pay to say the least).
Bottom line, in this day and age, cancer is not as deadly as it once was. Obviously it's still an extraordinarily strong and deadly disease, but you hear more and more survivors of all types of cancer then ever before.
With stem cell transplants and newer, better and safer treatments, positive outcomes are more prevalent.
My elderly neighbour(70) across the street has been battling some lung cancer and some lymph node cancer. She went through some rough patches during the summer, the heat didn't help, but I saw her last week as she arrived home driving on her own. I cheered her being strong enough to drive and she literally leaped out of the car to tell me her latest news. Another week of radiation treatment, and her Oncologist wasn't going to make it as severe as initially thought...she IS beating hers too!!!!!!

We're out here driver8....tons of good vibes from you and yours as well as our Du community will only enhance your fathers positive outcome.
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driver8 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-18-06 07:19 PM
Response to Reply #10
12. Tripper11, thanks for those very positive words!!
I really do appreciate it. I am glad to hear that things went well for you, too.

Gracias.
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Shine Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-18-06 06:03 PM
Response to Original message
11. I'm sorry to hear this news, driver8
You and I are about the same age, and our fathers about also about the same age, so I can relate to that sense of shock you must be feeling. It's hard to see those who we love change with health challenges.

I also happen to volunteer with Hospice, as a visitor to those struggling with life-threatening illnesses. My experience has taught me that the most valuable thing you can offer your father at this time is a willingness to simply BE with him and listen to whatever might come up. Receiving a cancer diagnosis is NOT a death sentence and although he and you may feel some fear, know that the path to Healing can take many forms...

I wish you and your family much Peace and Comfort during this time.

:hug:
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LiberalHeart Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-18-06 08:25 PM
Response to Original message
13. I'm a 16 year survivor...
...and I have a friend who had lung cancer that went to her brain. She's still going strong with no current sign of cancer, six years later.

Call 1-800-4-CANCER and ask for all the info they have on your dad's kind of cancer. They are great about supplying all the latest research, treatments, etc. They'll ask how much "truth" you want and respond with as much as you're ready to read. You can get just quickie brochures or detailed white papers that probably only a doctor can understand. Your choice.
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Maestro Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-18-06 08:28 PM
Response to Original message
14. I'm a young survivor. I was 35
Edited on Mon Sep-18-06 08:30 PM by Maestro
when diagnosed and 36 when I got rid of it. Doctors can do incredible things when cancer is caught early enough. It seems that the doctors are finding this metastasized form of cancer early enough that it may not cause too many problems other than the chemo and possible surgeries. Good vibes are being sent your dad's way. Take care.
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