Words Women Use...

[bridgit]

"Fine" - This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.

"Five minutes!!" - If she is getting dressed, this is half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given 5 more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house. Women feel this is more than fair after men having invented maps on which 1" = 1 mile.

"Nothing" - This is the calm before the storm. This actually means "something," and you should therefore be on your toes. Arguments that begin with "Nothing" usually end in "Fine"

"Go ahead" - This is in fact a dare, and not permission. Don't do it.

The Loud Sigh - This is not actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A "Loud Sigh" means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you over "Nothing"

"That's Okay" - This is one of the most dangerous statements that a woman can make to a man. "That's Okay" means that she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

"Thanks" - A woman is thanking you. Do not question it or faint. Just say, "You're welcome."

"Whatever" - This is a woman's way of saying, "%!#@ YOU!"

Send this to the men you know so as to warn them about future arguments they could avoid if they can only remember the terminology! :thumbsup:

[izzybeans]

1. I had a women tell me "that's okay"

after I apologized for mistaking her brother for one of about 5 Brazilian mildly obese men wearing a baseball cap and a goatee at an Indiana bar on an Indiana night.

[bridgit]

2. ya'see there...

it does happen :)

[izzybeans]

3. and you are correct. It wasn't okay.

However, I do feel vindicated since he looked like every other dude at the bar.

[_testify_]

17. ROFL

It took me a bit to realize the men were not from Brazil. :)

[lukasahero]

4. FTR women got the 5 minutes idea from football. eom

[MissMillie]

5. LOL! Good response!

it always takes 30 minutes to play the last 5 minutes of any football game!

[bridgit]

8. i should give hubby a 'two minute warning' just to see what happens...

:rofl: :thumbsup:

[HughBeaumont]

6. Actually . . .

"Fuck You!" is the woman's way of saying "Fuck You".

And they usually don't after they say that . . .

[liontamer]

7. actually, as demonstrated on the L word

the correct answer to "fuck you" when said with a smile, is "ok" It's a little double entendre that men rarely figure out.

[regularguy]

9. "Amazing"

When a woman tells you you're "amazing" it means she's found someone else and you're done.

[bridgit]

10. heh-heh, good one...

:) no wait, unless you're on the receiving end x(

[Avalux]

11. This post is terribly sexist -

and extremely inaccurate. I don't say any of those things! :yoiks:

[bridgit]

12. oh honey, me neither...

:pals:---------------------->:rofl:

[Avalux]

15. rofl!

:rofl:

Actually, I've perfected the "loud sigh". :toast:

[bridgit]

16. me too!! cept i have included a wistful 'roll of the eyes' very effective

:toast: :thumbsup:

[cwydro]

13. love it

and so did all the women in my office!:hi:

[bridgit]

14. that's the spirit!!

:bounce: :hi:

[zanne]

18. The way we lie to each other.

Husband; "I'll do it tomorrow".
Me: "Okay".

[kwassa]

19. The Look

when I get The Look, I know that I have seriously screwed up.

Completely nonverbal.

The meaning is, of course "you better back up, take it back, and start serious groveling now if you would like to live past the next few minutes".

[Vidar]

20. Good list.

[maxsolomon]

21. i didn't see "i'm sorry"

that's right - women don't say that.

[Canuckistanian]

22. "Top" - for a shirt

Like my wife asks me, "Are you gonna wear that top?"

And I sez, "Men don't wear 'tops'".