Early start, today's the big day

[Robb]

This afternoon I'm talking to the ex, hopefully with the end result being a check for the money she owes me.

I'm not going to bring up that she moved out a month ago.

I'm not going to bring up that I packed 99% of her things.

I'm not going to bring up that I put them carefully in the shed, not the street.

I'm not going to bring up that her "best friend" confirmed to me she's been cheating since this whole thing started (1 month, 1 week ago).

I'm not going to bring up that I've read transcripts of her new guy's divorce proceedings from last year.

I'm not going to bring up that, despite her belief, everyone in town knows she's been cheating on, and treating like crap, the coolest guy in the county.

I'm not going to bring up that she's going to find it quite hard to live here.

I'm simply going to be pleasant, and ask she keep at least one promise and fork over what amounts to five paychecks for me.

I truly, truly hope she just does. Bon chance me!

[ScreamingMeemie]

1. ...and you are going to make it through this!

:hug: My thoughts are with you Robb.

[tjwmason]

2. You've got every single one of us lined up behind you.

You have been more than even the most perfect gentleman could hope to be.

Best of luck with bringing this whole nasty business to a close.

:yourock:

[Robb]

3. Thanks, it's comforting

I'm getting a lot of good feedback out here as well. Never regretted taking the high road before -- but also not afraid to get in the mud if that's what it takes. Especially now. :toast:

[Ptah]

4. Take a short vacation first, ya dingbat.

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_mesg&forum=105&topic_id=5749537&mesg_id=5749537

be careful.

[swimboy]

5. I'm behind you all the way.

You are taking the best approach. (And I see you have done all the research necessary to implement a Plan B should that be required.)

:hug:

[miss_american_pie]

6. Good luck

:hug:

[Dangerously Amused]

7. Good luck, Robb.

Again, I bet you anything that she'll try to negotiate her debt and persuade you to "settle" for a much smaller amount than what she owes. And again, if she pulls that crap, remember: If she had to - okay, HAD TO - come up with that money, like for a operation to save her kid's life... she would do it. She would find a way. She would. She would take out a loan, or sell something, or borrow it from family or friends or her new boyfriend, or whatever. The point being, she can do it, she just doesn't want to.

Remember too, in this situation you will actually be doing her a favor by holding her accountable for her actions. I would suggest giving her a choice and a consequence today: She's got two weeks until she leaves on another adventure, and will be gone for a month. Two weeks is plenty of time for her to come up with the money if she sets her mind to it. I say tell her, very calmly and matter-of-factly, that either she comes up with the money and has it in your hands before she leaves, or while she is gone you will take that opportunity to file a claim in court. That is a very fair (actually more than fair, given the circumstances) offer. And then follow through.

[BarenakedLady]

8. Good luck

I hope it goes well for you.

:hug:

[av8rdave]

9. Good luck Robb

[buddhamama]

10. Good Luck Robb

I hope it all works out for you. take care. :hug:

[cwydro]

11. good luck

don't let her make you mad, or you'll end up saying every last one of those things...I know, I've been there. Love stinks.

[Robb]

12. DAMMIT.

I just called her, she's still five freakin' hours away.

She's going to have a hell of a time getting her stuff out by tomorrow.

[Dangerously Amused]

13. Christ almighty.

Dance, Robb, dance. Dance to my tune. You know you want to.


:grr:


Hey, put that anger/frustration to good, constructive use when you do see her, kay?

[tjwmason]

14. Don't let her distract you.

You've got a plan, follow it.

[YDogg]

15. I'm guessing she's not in a real hurry to return.

Hang in there.

[Robb]

16. Apparently she's got the guy with her, too

Turns out the people she thinks are her close friends like me a lot better. :eyes:

Anyhow, she's got the little homewrecker with her. I've already figured out she's not going to be here before my poker night begins across town, so the plan now is tomorrow noon. She doesn't know this yet. Noon works for me, because it's my lunch, and one of the local deputies jumped at the chance to do a civil standby while she's moving her stuff out.

He also offered to harrass the hell out of them if she manages to convince the new sugar daddy to buy a house here in town. I told him it was the sweetest thing anyone's said all day, but that if they decide to live here, he's always going to be "the rich guy that whore cheated on Robb for" and life would be miserable enough.

Almost. ;)

[YDogg]

17. The civil standby sounds like a good idea.

I would also hide your valuables, including keys.

[YDogg]

19. It would also be wise to make sure, depending on the exact nature ...

... of the relationship, that she is no longer listed as beneficiary on any life insurance policies, and that sort of thing, or listed as a contact on any medical form or similar paperwork.

[Robb]

20. Way ahead of you

Locks too. Dammit. I can't stand people like this. Especially, of course, when they do it to me. x(

[RevCheesehead]

18. You DID change the locks, I hope.

If not, you know what to do.

[LostinVA]

22. I don't think he did -- I told him to, too

You can get it down now, probably, but it'll cost a mint. If you have the money, DO IT!!!

[LostinVA]

21. Call up the local Fuzz -- they WILL stay there while she moves her stuff

ROBB -- YOU NEED TO DO THIS, MAN!!!!!!!

[Robb]

23. On it, LostinVA

Already changed the locks, already booked a cop.

Plus all of them know she's not to be there unless I am. Extra watch.

Plus they're spot-testing her this weekend for drugs while she's on call with the ambulance. I didn't ask for that one.

[YDogg]

24. Wow. Good deal.

I like the spot test thing. :-)

[LostinVA]

25. WONDERFUL! Remember, I had a psycho ex who as a cop

It made it all even more interesting -- hope all went well for you last night. I couldn't get onto DU.

[cwydro]

26. so how'd it go?

we're all hoping it went well...I've been there too.

Keep us posted.