Brand new elephant, still in the package

[BurtWorm]

Never used. Excellent condition.



Reminds me of a Myron Cohen story:

"I heppen to know the Bahnim n Bailey people and I can get you a elephant for a honndred dollahs."

Pause.

"Vot the hell I'm gonna do with a elephant?"

"He could sit down, press your pents. He could hang your coat up. High. He could give you shower."

"Who said I need a shower? Vot I'm gonna do with a elephant?"

"He's cheap to keep. Eats pinnuts."

"Vot the hell I care vot he eats? Let him eat chick'n chow mein, vot the hell I care? VOT I'M GONNA DO WITH A ELEPHANT?!"

"Vot the hell you yellink? He's gotta a tronk."

"So vot? I got a hope chest! VOT THE HELL I'M GONNA DO WITH A ELEPHANT!? I live in one room. I don't even got room for a chihuahua pup. What the hell I'm gonna do with a elephant?"

"Okay, lissn. Tell you vot I'm gonna do. I'm gonna get you a deal, get you t'ree elephants for two honndred dollahs."

Pause.

"NOW you're talking!"

[BurtWorm]

1. kick