Question for DU "nice guys"

[taterguy]

The most important football game in the history of your school is being played Saturday. A friend asks you to help her move.

What do you do?

[ohiosmith]

1. Does she have big ta tas?

[taterguy]

8. Average sized ones

[Phillycat]

2. Would you like to hmm hmm with this friend?

[taterguy]

6. That wouldn't be very nice would it?

hmmmm hmmmm is supposed to be a magical experience shared by two people who care about each other; not something done because you owe someone a favor.

The situation doesn't apply to me. I'm just posing a hypothetical to see what the Lounge thinks.

[Phillycat]

14. No, I'm just saying in general

If the guy in this scenario would someday like to hmm hmm with the girl in this scenario, it might be nice for him to show her that he is a reliable, trusty sort, so that later on when she's deciding whether or not to drop trou, she'll think, "Well, he's a good guy, it's probably cool."

[taterguy]

23. Do women choose mates based on furniture moving skills?

I should have included that in my online personals ad

[Phillycat]

25. No, but they do choose mates based on

reliability, coming through in a crisis, ability to show stability, responsibility, and maturity - like choosing to help a friend over an entertainment venue.

[Kutjara]

69. My experience has been that many women quickly...

...get tired of 'nice guys.' Nice guys are the ones who get tagged with the 'friend' label, thereby discounting them as romantic interests. They're good enough to be a shoulder to cry on or a pair of arms when something needs lifting, but not good enough for anything more. I spent years being every woman's best friend and, let me tell you, it isn't all it's cracked up to be.

I used to particularly love it when a woman I liked would be in pieces after another breakup with a 'bastard' and would say, 'why can't I find someone like you?' Of course, they didn't mean it and within a month were off with yet another mean and moody type.

So I stopped being nice, and life has improved considerably since I did.

[Phillycat]

73. Those aren't women, they're girls. nt

[Kutjara]

74. I agree, but unfortunately...

...there are girls like that in every age group.

[JVS]

18. More importantly, does he have an actual chance to do so?

If she's already decided you're not in the hmmmmm mmmmm club, no amount of moving stuff will change that.

[Phillycat]

20. See my post 14 above

But I catch your meaning. :)

[Schema Thing]

41. get a hmmm'r?

[democracyindanger]

3. Football.

That was easy.

[chaska]

4. I think I could wrangle a massage for "my poor aching muscles."

I have strategeries.

...besides, I'd do ANYTHING not to have to watch football.

[uppityperson]

5. help her move but take a break for the game?

[MrCoffee]

7. sigh...i'd help with the move

[Deep13]

9. Can't answer. Would never put "important" and "football game" in same sentence.

I guess I would just help her move.

[taterguy]

21. Ok, insert your favorite specator event in the question

It's just a hypothetical exercise

[Deep13]

22. That's just it--

--spectating never trumps doing.

[taterguy]

26. I envy you

In principle I agree, but I often fail to live up to my principles

[Hosnon]

79. Just generalize it to doing something you really, really, really want to do vs. helping. nt

[trof]

31. Mah man!

ditto
I'd actually RATHER move furniture.

[El Fuego]

10. Just tell her you're only available Sunday.

If she wants you to help her, she has to go by YOUR schedule.

[JVS]

16. good advice

[petronius]

51. Um, hello!? Sunday? Have you never heard of the NFL?

:P

[kwassa]

11. Hmm. Carrying heavy objects vs. relaxing with a brewski, screaming till hoarse.

I've moved too many people.

The game.

(as others have said, depends on the friendship, and expectations, or not.)

[sakabatou]

12. Help her move

I never went to a game while I was in HS.

[ghostsofgiants]

13. Help her move.

I hate football.

[last_texas_dem]

75. Yeah, I agree

I was going to post the exact same thing as you, but you've saved me the trouble!

[JVS]

15. Go to the game

[some guy]

17. help her move

I don't care about football... like several other guys have already posted.

:P

[matcom]

19. Punt

;)

[jpgray]

24. Who cares about football? But helping people move is misery defined

[JVS]

28. So I guess that means football by default?

[jpgray]

29. Indifference always triumphs over misery

Unless it was a good friend, in which case I would show but bitch constantly. If it was someone I was interested in having a relationship with I would probably try to avoid becoming a houseboy immediately, and instead take her to a show or dinner or summat at first.

[JVS]

32. You raise a good point re: the houseboy

That's a big favor to ask from someone you don't know that well

[Ariana Celeste]

27. Can you listen to the game on the radio?

I mean, I'm not a guy, but if a guy was moving my furniture I'd have no problem playin' sports radio talk while they do so. But then I also like football. Blah. :)

[leftofthedial]

30. since "most important football game" is a meaningless statement

I tell the friend I can't help her move

because I don't help people move anymore.

[taterguy]

33. Why don't you help people move?

Not that there's anything wrong with that but I'm curious

[JVS]

34. Probably because it sucks

[leftofthedial]

36. I figure after doing it about a hundred times

I have done my duty

Plus, I'm old and can't afford enough painkillers to make it through the week following moving

[HCE SuiGeneris]

35. May DU "bad boys" respond ?

:evilgrin:

[taterguy]

37. please do

[HCE SuiGeneris]

42. If you are the only one available

then you are screwn. Take a radio with you.
If however, there are other people available to help, set your timetable with her and let her know when you are able to help. Going to the fridge to grab me a :beer: and maybe rustle up a lil :popcorn:

Gluck, however it pans out!

[taterguy]

44. This really is a hypothetical

I'm not asking for advice. I am not trying to decide whether or not to help someone move. However, the situation almost came up this weekend. A friend is moving and my wife volunteered our services, before finding out that the friend hired professionals. I thought it would be fun to see what the Lounge thought. So far, I'm really enjoying the replies.

[justice1]

48. Your wife is wrong to volunteer your services.

My husband had a habit of making me the built in babysitter when his friends needed one. I finally got it through to him how disrespectful it was, and now asks me first, in private.

[Zavulon]

38. Friend over football, period. Sorry.

If the Super Bowl were on and my brother were in it, then I'd ask her if she could wait a few hours. Other than that, you're out of luck if she's really a friend.

[Lowell]

39. Help her move.

TiVo the stupid game. I'd much rather be doing something than sitting around watching sports. You said she was a friend, well freinds help each other. Its a no brainer. Now go out and see if you can get some friends to help you with the task at hand. That's called teamwork.

[unpossibles]

40. I don't like football and I am a sucker, so I'd help her move n/t

[Schema Thing]

43. A nice guy will help his friend...

of course, if the game is important to him, he'll also likely find a way to do both.


This nice guy doesn't give a flying fuck about football teams, so this nice guy would have no problem in this scenario. He might even get (but not expect) a little hmmmm hmmmmm :P

[Lydia Leftcoast]

65. Not liking football is a positive trait from the point of view of many

women. :-)

[Roon]

45. Where I come from

Friends don't ask friends to help you move.

[HCE SuiGeneris]

46. Isn't that a Seinfeldism? nt

[Roon]

60. No

I think it's because my friends can't stay in one place long and moving them every few months really burned a lot of us out. So we don't offer and they don't ask. :-)

[flvegan]

47. I'd help her move. Not so much as a second to consider it.

Besides, I'd almost RATHER help someone move than watch football (or any sport) on tv.

[Guava Jelly]

49. Not really a big football fan

and i have a pickup truck.
So I would help my friend move

[AngryAmish]

50. No moving

Unless she has lots of good looking friends/sisters. If you move her then you are being played for a chump.

[Rabrrrrrr]

52. I help her move. Why would I waste my life at a fucking ball game?

Especially a *school* one?

Who gives a shit?

Go do the important thing.

[trof]

53. commie

;-)

[Rabrrrrrr]

55. Long live Lenin!

How I am hating America and every capitalist pig dog thing that it is being standing for. Ptui!! I am on it spitting, like Russian bear mauling American bald eagle.

Comrade!

[trof]

56. I thought it was 'running dog lackey' and your smiley's been shot.

[jmowreader]

54. Hard tape the game and help your friend move

The spanking your school either gives or receives on Saturday will be just as good on HT as it would be if you were sitting in front of the tube while it's going on. However, your friend needs you.

I have a wonderful idea: how about Going Back Home After She's Moved, Getting the Hard Tape and Watching It Together?

Oh, I almost forgot...is this a college game, a high school game or are the South Park Cows playing the Middle Park Cowboys again? If the third, find out whether John Stamos' older brother Richard Stamos is singing "Loving You" at the halftime show this year and stay the hell away if he is.

[taterguy]

58. for the purposes of this hypothetical . . .

It's the college game between Wake Forest and Georgia Tech

I didn't go to Wake but it's nice to see the little guy (school) win once in a while

[HCE SuiGeneris]

62. WF and GT -- well hell... I thought you were talking,

hypothetically of course, of a REAL game.

:evilgrin: :9

[YDogg]

63. Wake will win. Help her move, then have your wife nurse you back to health.

Just not on a plane, yo.

[Deja Q]

57. The friend

I don't care for football, and there was no loyalty in high school football anyway.

[Broken_Hero]

59. Help her move

and then watch the highlights...

[Porcupine]

61. You always help a HER move. Buddies get rescheduled. nt.

.

[cobalt1999]

64. You're not from the south I take it.

No southern needs to even ask that question.

Football.

MAYBE if it was some crappy homecoming game against say Northwest Idaho Community College, then you might be able to record and watch later. However, you said it was an important game. You go.

What friend would ask you to miss your teams most important game anyway? She sounds selfish. :)


Edit. *** Oops, you wanted responses from nice guys...never mind ***

[SPKrazy]

66. Depends On The Level Of Friendship I Guess

I mean, is it a friendship that is more important to help someone out than to watch a football game?

Or is it a casual friendship and she will find someone else if you say no?

Or can you do both? (TV vs. going to the game somewhere do make the difference)

Me, I'd have to weigh the situation out. If it were someone I was very close to, I'd probably help her.
If it was a friend that would find someone else easily without me, and they understood, then I'd watch the game.

I'd probably try to compromise.

I'd like to watch the game with her, and then move before and after the game.

[jakefrep]

67. Help her move....

..but make sure the TV is the first thing you unpack.

[Dude_CalmDown]

68. So you want this girl?

I love football but if I was working toward a certain goal (the one in which I believe you're probably working toward) I'd miss the game. But that's just me.

[Little Wing]

70. Help a girl move. My school always loses anyway, and I hate

the school.

[Generic Brad]

71. No brainer - move

Friends are more important than a game. I have always been acutely aware of my NFL team's schedule and get keenly interested during the playoffs. But the missus is not a fan and has been known to make plans on Sunday for activities where there is no other good time to do it. She makes an effort not to pull me away, but sometimes it is unavoidable.

Over the years I have learned not to grumble or complain. My wife's needs trump my desire to see a game any day - no contest.

[bigwillq]

72. What game is it?

:shrug:

[Drum]

76. Help her move.

Do what you can with the timing of it..if there's any flexibility in friend's move, maybe a compromise can be reached.

Of course, if one finds one has too many friends, then do the game day thang. But me, I'd help her move.

:shrug:

[momophile]

77. I'm asking people to help me move on Dec. 30th...

is that just as bad?

[Starbucks Anarchist]

78. Neither.

I hate sports and I'm lazy. :D