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originalpckelly Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Dec-03-06 11:09 AM
Original message
The OS Declaration of Independence
When in the Course of System Events, it becomes necessary for one system to unplug the Ethernet cables which have connected it with another, and to assume, among the powers of the earth, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Nature and of Nature's God entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation.

We hold these truths to be self-evident: that all users are created equal, that they are endowed, by their Creator, with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Sanity, and the Pursuit of Happiness.

That to secure these rights, Operating Systems are instituted on computers, deriving their just powers from the consent of the Users, That whenever any Operating System becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the Users to alter or abolish it, and to institute a new Operating System, laying its foundation on such principles, and organizing its interfaces in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Sanity and Happiness.

Prudence, indeed, will dictate that Operating Systems long established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shewn, that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable, than to right themselves by abolishing the OS to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same Object, evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such Operating System, and to provide new Guards for their future security.

Such has been the patient sufferance of these Users; and such is now the necessity which constrains them to alter their former Systems of Operation. The history of the present King of OSes is a history of repeated injuries and usurpations, all having in direct object the establishment of an absolute Tyranny over these Users. To prove this, let the Facts be submitted to a candid world.

It has refused to put out security patches in a timely manner, the most wholesome and necessary for the public good.

It has forbidden it's users to add support for technologies of immediate and pressing importance.

It has thrown together UI elements at places unusual, uncomfortable, and distant from the logical or normal, for the sole purpose of fatiguing them into compliance with its measures.

It has made Users dependent on its Will alone for the tenure of their licenses, and the amount of payment for them.

It has erected a multitude of New Editions, and sent hither swarms of Fanboys to harass our people and eat out their substance.

It has kept among us, DRM, without our Consent.

It has affected to render Microsoft independent of and superior to the Consumer Power.

For protecting them, by a mock Settlement from punishment for any Monopolies which they should have over the Users of these Systems:

For imposing Microsoft Taxes on us without our Consent:

For depriving us in many cases, of the benefit of Ease of Use:

For suspending our own Computers, and declaring themselves invested with power to bring them back when they so chuse.

It has plundered our seas, ravaged our coasts, burnt our towns, and destroyed the lives of our people.

It is at this time transporting large Armies of foreign Programmers to complete the works of death, desolation, and tyranny, already begun with circumstances of Cruelty & Perfidy scarcely paralleled in the most barbarous ages, and totally unworthy the Users of a civilized nation.

It has constrained our fellow Users taken Captive on the Internets to bear Arms against their Country, to become the executioners of their friends and Brethren, or to fall themselves by their Hands.

In every stage of these Oppressions We have Petitioned for Redress in the most humble terms: Our repeated Petitions have been answered only by repeated injury. A King whose character is thus marked by every act which may define a Tyrant, is unfit to be the OS of a free people!
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Briarius Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Dec-03-06 11:31 AM
Response to Original message
1. lol, that's awesome!
:hi:
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originalpckelly Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Dec-03-06 11:48 AM
Response to Reply #1
3. Give me stability or give me BSoDeath!
Edited on Sun Dec-03-06 11:49 AM by originalpckelly
:patriot:
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lildreamer316 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Dec-03-06 11:32 AM
Response to Original message
2. ROTFLMAO!!
Thank you!
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originalpckelly Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Dec-03-06 11:53 AM
Response to Reply #2
4. December 3, 2006: OS Independence Day!
:patriot:
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originalpckelly Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Dec-03-06 03:02 PM
Response to Reply #4
5. Of course if it was tomorrow...
that would really be cool!
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originalpckelly Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-04-06 02:35 PM
Response to Original message
6. A whole slew of PR articles for Microsoft are coming out lately...
prompted me to do this!

:grr:

I hate Windows Vista! I hate Windows XP!
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