Many Odd And Random Things About Me Most People Do Not Know

Wetzelbill

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Sun Dec-03-06 07:47 PM
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Many Odd And Random Things About Me Most People Do Not Know

This is from my latest myspace blog. -WB

Many Odd And Random Things About Me Most People Do Not Know

1. I own the dvds of every single Wrestlemania ever.

2. I once won a fight without throwing a single punch. I took the guy to the ground and caught him in a choke.

3. My left pinkie frequently dislocates due to an old wrestling injury. Sometimes when I simply reach for something. I have snapped it in place in front of other people without even acknowledging or letting on what happened.

4. It is a myth that I am scared of monkeys. I have no fear of them, they just creep me out. I cannot even look at the television if one is on.

5. This fall I set one of my shirts on fire. It was slightly damp so I put it in the oven for a few minutes and forgot about it. Not good.

6. I secretly have an obsession with old nighttime soap operas. I own a few box sets of Dallas and have rented the first several seasons on dvd. I have watched the first season of Dynasty, as well.

7. At the University of Arizona one of my essays is required reading in a graduate seminar. I wrote it for a lower level English class in less than two hours.

8. For about ten years of my life, I patterned myself after a pro wrestler named Mr. Perfect.

9. For a few years of my life, I patterned myself after Batman. Currently I am in my Johnny Cash phase.

10. I have recorded myself singing karaoke versions of well known songs. My best is probably a serviceable version of “Tuesday’s Gone” by Lynyrd Skynyrd. Oh and I am not good either. I have been described as sounding like a “dirt sandwich.”

11. In seventh grade I wrestled at 100 pounds. As a senior in high school, despite being much heavier normally, I wrestled at 98 pounds. I would lose nearly 14 pounds in 4 days just to make the weight.

12. I walked around without an ACL in my right knee for about eight years. I originally blew it out after a bull stepped on my knee at a rodeo.

13. My goal in life is to be the most influential Blackfeet Indian of my time. Money has nothing to do with it either. I hope to leave some type of legacy.

14. I have come out of “retirement” about once or twice every year for the last 10 years. Usually a nagging injury or cruel reality brings me back to my senses. The last time reality hit was when my youngest brother made me tap out to a camel clutch.

15. I currently sit on the hearing board at the University of Arizona. You know there is trouble when some student’s disciplinary fate resides on a decision I am a involved with.

16. I watch more cartoons now than I did when I was ten years old.

17. I have created a fictional band with my youngest brother called “Yellow Number Five.” Our first fictional album is named Community Food Bank. I am the lead singer and he is the air guitarist. My name is Exclamation Point, and I sign it like this !. I call him The Outskirts, but I don’t think he likes that name. It is a work in progress.

18. I also have a fictional biography in the works called “Bill Wetzel: The Man Who Couldn’t Reach The Top Shelf.”

19. I once had a nightmare that I saw Charlize Theron murder some guy in a wooded area. It was fucked up.

20. This one time when I was drunk I pro wrestled a bearskin rug in front of a bunch of people. I won the pinfall but ended up cutting my hand on a light hanging from the ceiling when I went for a flying axe handle. I had to go to the hospital and get stitches.

21. My brother and I frequently call home and terrorize my parents. I once told my mom that he was involved in a gang dispute with the Los Mags and Biz Lats. Those are fictional gangs from the tv show The Shield. He once told our dad that I was a heroin junkie with a hooker girlfriend. The sad thing is both of our parents believed this stuff.

22. I went to college in Seattle because I wanted to go to Seattle Mariner and Supersonic games. I now attend college in Tucson because I am a huge fan of Pac-Ten football and basketball.

23. I have terrible sleeping schedule problems. I often get so far off track I will wake up in the evening and go to sleep in the mornings.

24. One time I had a dream that I ate a giant marshmallow. When I woke up my pillow was gone. (now I am just lying because I know nobody read this far)

25. I own every episode ever of Arrested Development.

26. If I could fight one fictional literary figure it would be Mycroft Holmes.

27. I once took an online test that said the literary figure I was most like was the narrator form the novel Fight Club. Another test said that the novel I was most like was One Hundred Years Of Solitude by Gabriel Garcia Marquez.

28. A few years ago as I got off the bus, an attractive Hispanic woman said something to me in Spanish. I did not know what she was saying. She repeated it to no avail. She then said” You do not know what that means?” I said that I did not know how to speak Spanish. She seemed disgusted at my answer, as if I was the biggest idiot on earth. Later on I found at that she was trying to get me to go home with her. (to put it in a relatively nice way)

29. I often use the catchphrase “Drop The Hammer.” Others that I frequently say are “Disco!” “Rock and/or Roll” and “Bob Loblaw” which is said like “bah blah blah.”

30. I am so terrible with names that I have actually known people for years without ever knowing their first names.

31. I am at once extremely arrogant and quite shy. I hide the shyness with an absurd sense of humor.

32. I am quite accomplished in a kitchen as far as a male bachelor goes. My cooking and baking skills are pretty solid.