Attention lesbians: please have a toaster on standby.

[LeftyMom]

I'm about to drink some soymilk, and the highly esteemed medical journal WorldNetDaily has informed me that doing so could make me gay. I
m not convinced, but I need you to be prepared, just in case.

[ikojo]

1. Just don't eat tofu

in the same time period as the soy milk consumption.

[Redstone]

2. A toaster? Why? (And please excuse my obliviousness.)

Redstone

[yurbud]

3. It's an S & M sex toy. One mammary per slot.

[Redstone]

4. Ouch!! A bit of light spanking is one thing, but OUCH!

Redstone

[yurbud]

22. I won't even mention the bagle slicer

[derby378]

6. Geez, you kids with your pot and acid. What goes through your heads!

:rofl:

[yurbud]

8. somebody had to come up with an answer.

[youthere]

35. owie.

[Zookeeper]

24. Well, you know how those "gays" are always....

trying to recruit heterosexuals? If you sign-up, you get a toaster!

[youthere]

36. obviously redstone didn't get a copy of the "gay agenda"

the toaster is a promo...details are on page 5b of the GA.

[Frank Cannon]

26. I'm so hetero that the toaster reference went way over my head

Apparently, it comes from the old joke that gays (lesbians, in particular) give out toaster ovens to other homosexuals who "recruit" new members--part of the so-called "gay agenda". This joke was popularized on the coming-out episode of Ellen, wherein Laura Dern jokes to Ellen about this tradition. At the tag at the end of that episode, Melissa Etheridge shows up with a toaster oven and a whole bunch of paperwork to fill out.

[Mrs.Matcom]

5. I shall wake matcom...

so he can get your toaster ready!!

[InternalDialogue]

7. Well, if you feel the urge to "make the jump" after the milk,

I will probably then develop a crush on you.

That's how these things happen in my world.

:freak:

[yurbud]

9. soy is a lesbian aphrodesiac? what if a guy rubs it all over himself?

[Betty88]

34. soy and back hair, very sexy......

[SeattleGirl]

10. So, what do I have to do to get a waffle iron?

:shrug:

[reformedrepub]

11. you would get

burned boobies....

[SeattleGirl]

12. Yikes!

Never mind.....

[reformedrepub]

13. Ill bring the

syrup........

[SeattleGirl]

14. .....

:spank:

[LynneSin]

21. You wannabes sell yourselves short when it comes to appliances

I'm saving myself for this Cuisinart Panini Griddler!

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

23. If it's a Panini Griddler, why aren't there paninis on it?

Huh, huh? Don't have an answer for that, do you?

[LostinVA]

28. Exactly what I was thinking

[Bassic]

15. Um... what?

Soy milk can make you gay? That's a new one.

[GirlinContempt]

29. this i think

http://www.rightwingwatch.org/2006/12/soy_makes_you_g_1.html

[Bassic]

30. Fucking ridiculous tripe.

This kind of blatant ignorant intolerance makes me mad.

[emmajane67]

16. I need a toaster here in the corner.

Someone close to me came out to me last night.

She does not know anything about DU or the toaster thing but I'm sure new appliances are appreciated by everyone!

[Spider Jerusalem]

17. Odd. I had vanilla soy milk in my coffee this morning.

And I still feel like a flaming hetero. Is it supposed to take a while to work, or something?

[meegbear]

18. Sorry sunshine, but it will only work on men ...

one of the many pitfalls by not getting that Y chromosome.

[AllegroRondo]

19. Funny, my wife makes me put soy creamer in my coffee

do you think she may have an ulterior motive?

[LynneSin]

20. No LeftyMom, it's just going to shrink your penis

and we all know that having a small penis means you're either gay or an owner of a Mongo-sized SUV
:eyes:

[KitchenWitch]

25. I think it only works for men

Since women are already "driven" by estrogen!

Not sure what accounts for the "rise" in lesbianism, if we are going by that theory!

[LostinVA]

27. You're already an honorary lesbian warrior

God knows what soy milk will do to you... turn your skin to flannel or something.

[Hugin]

31. LOL!

This is so insane I can't stand it!

LOL!

Hey, I drink lots of soymilk.

Will that make me a lesbian too? I need a new toaster.

[Left Is Write]

32. Soy = gay?

All rightie then.

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

37. Yeah, some fundie actually blamed soy for contributing to homosexuality.

I ate tofu for lunch today and I'm a lesbian. So I guess it makes sense. Hmm...maybe it's because of the lentil dahl or the brown rice, though.

[Left Is Write]

38. Oh! I thought girls became lesbians because they were breastfed.

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

39. Hmm...I was breastfed. Although, so was my straight sister...

Then again, she called me up recently to tell me she was making jello shots to have while her roommate and her watched the "VS Fashion Show."

As far as I'm concerned, doing Jello shots with your roommate while watching a lingerie show is pretty gay.

She denies this.

:rofl:

[Xipe Totec]

41. Both of my boys were breastfed too

definitely not gay.

my youngest brother was bottle fed, and he is gay.

:shrug:

[Zookeeper]

42. Well, there you go....

Breastfed boys: Straight.
Breastfed girls: Lesbian.

Bottlefed boys: Gay.
Bottlefed girls: Straight.

See, our breasts are purely sexual objects after all. Does this vindicate Hugh Hefner?

:+ :+ :+

[Xipe Totec]

45. My brain hurts n/t

[Fleshdancer]

44. maybe they're lesbians

Do either one of them own a toaster? :D

[Xipe Totec]

46. No, but I do....

Oh My God! I'm a lesbian!

No wonder I like women!

:rofl:

[Fleshdancer]

47. yep. the gay agenda is sneaky that way

:rofl:

[Xipe Totec]

48. I feel cheated

I can't fit my man tits in the toaster :cry:

[Dastard Stepchild]

33. Well that explains everything... sort of...

I came to drinking soy milk later in life, so maybe that is why I am only bisexual. :crazy:

[KamaAina]

40. I thought soy only made us guys gay?

It does contain natural estrogens, which is where all this blather is coming from.

If you really want to be a lesbian (and who doesn't? :-) ), you'll just have to find some food that has natural testosterone, like pork rinds or Fritos or something. :P

[NNadir]

43. Wow. It's that easy to cure heterosexuality?

I'd try it, but my wife would be upset if I went gay.