"What's the word on the street, Johnny?" (or, favorite Police Squad/ Naked Gun quotes)

[Bossy Monkey]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Police_Squad!#Running_Gags
I was kind of shocked that nobody had transcribed the Johnny sequences for the Memorable Quotes section of IMDb's entry for "Police Squad." Then again, it was a TV show rather than a movie, so I guess that makes sense.

I'm reading a lot of bad detective fiction, so Johnny comes to mind a lot.

Anyway, 20-odd years on, my memory isn't helping with word-for-word quotes. I liked the LaSorda and Dick Clark bits, though.

[jeff30997]

1. I never watched Police Squad !

I saw the 3 Naked Gun movies but I never watched Police Squad.

I love that kind of humor.

That and Airplane and Top Secret were great comedies.

[windlight]

3. I tapes all 6 episodes

when they were on Comedy Central years ago... I still watch them from time to time.., Very funny.. :)

[Bossy Monkey]

4. You should consider buying or renting the DVD

http://video.barnesandnoble.com/search/product.asp?z=y&EAN=097360475128&itm=1
The main differences are as follows: The Johnny the Snitch character referenced above, inexplicably left out of the movie (high-sterical); Nordberg (back then Norberg) was played by Peter Lupus rather than OJ Simpson (whatever anybody may think of Simpson's guilt or innocence, the whole ordeal kind of sucks the comedy out of his scenes retroactively); and Ed was played by Alan North rather than George Kennedy (push).

Wildly funny stuff. If you like the ZAZ boys' movies, you'll most likely love this.

[edbermac]

2. Unfortunately, David Zucker has turned into a frothing neocon.

About as funny as Dennis Miller these days.

[Mad_Dem_X]

5. "Cigarette?" "Yes, it is."

Sorry, that's all I can think of at the moment.

[meegbear]

6. I bought the DVD of Police Squad! when it came out ...

I've only watched 2 of the 6 (I've seen them all before). I'm saving the rest for when I'm really down and need a pick me up.

[itsmesgd]

7. I like the Johnny shoeshine spot with Dick Clark buying the

wrinkle cream.

And the best Zucker Quote(s) from Airplane.

Surely you must be kidding.
I'm serious, and stop calling me Shirley.

Timmy, do you like gladiator movies?