Your biggest WTF moment?

[NewWaveChick1981]

I mean, a personal WTF moment... not about W ('cause we've all had those) or somebody or something else in the news or in the public eye---a genuine "I can't believe this shit is happening!" moment. My husband and I were talking about this last night, and I think my biggest WTF moment was a couple of years ago when I walked into a restaurant to pick up dinner. I held the door for the guy behind me, as I always do, and this guy (who was about 60-something) glared at me and said, "I AIN'T havin' no wummin holidn' no door fer me!" :wtf: I was stunned for a second, then I shut the door right in his face. He opened the door and looked really angry. I went to the register and picked up my take-out order, and the cashier said, "I can't believe that! That guy was so rude!" I said, "I know. Who knew that being polite was so terrible?" :shrug:

My mother taught me manners, and I hold the door for the person behind me no matter if they're male or female. I guess this guy was the world's biggest chauvinist. :eyes:

[datasuspect]

1. when i came to from a liquor-induced blackout in a cornfield in missouri

with 5 or 6 cops tackling me.

seems amtrak doesn't like it when you get too out of pocket. it was 9-11-2002.

[NewWaveChick1981]

2. Wow... that WAS a WTF moment, wasn't it?

:hi:

[Roon]

3. I was viscously attacked by an old woman on a crowded bus

for standing up and offering my seat to her. Ever since then I don't give up my seat for anyone!

[NewWaveChick1981]

6. Geez, it doesn't pay to be polite, does it?

:shrug:

[Roon]

23. No, it doesn't

but this was on the bus and there are a lot of kooks who ride the bus. I remember once I started to go into a bank and this elderly couple were coming out at the same time. I took two steps back and held open the door for them. They FLIPPED!! It was so cool. I will always respect and help the elderly anywhere else, but not on the bus. I was humiliated that day.

[NewWaveChick1981]

Well, at least that was a bright spot.

:) I've held the door for lots of people after that idiot guy, and they're either indifferent or say thank you. But it made me think twice about holding the door for anyone.

[Roon]

36. In today's world

it's tough to know what to do. I give everyone the benefit of the doubt and hold the door open. I don't give up my seat on the bus though..LOL

[The_Wizard]

71. Texas Gen'alman

I always try to be kind and help out when you can... even with something as small as a door. I had my daughter in a full cart at a shopping center w/ manual doors. A couple came to the door I was trying to enter from the other side and stopped to look at me. Then went to another door to exit. These were older folks too... they should have known better.

[JVS]

53. viscously? What did she do, shoot goo at you?

You should have said "Fuck you! Sit down or don't, but I refuse to be seated in your presence!"

A man has honor to worry about dammit!

[Manifestor_of_Light]

60. Was she slimy?

It's "vicious", not "viscous". Viscous means slippery.

[jgraz]

66. Sounds like a sticky situation

:rofl: I kill myself...

[skygazer]

4. Probably the surreal day when I was sweeping up where I worked

It was a family owned snowmobile shop. An older man walked in and asked me, "Are you So-and-so's (the owner's) boy?"

:wtf:

Mind you, I had short hair at the time but it wasn't that short and was in a feminine style. I was wearing a t-shirt and was quite obviously female (either that, or I had one heck of a set of man-boobs).

I said, "No..."

He said, "Well, are you a local boy?"

I said, a little affronted, "I'm not a boy at all." (I was 36 at the time)


So he spent the next half hour trying to cop a feel. :eyes:

[NewWaveChick1981]

9. OMG...

:yoiks: How bizarre....

[Wetzelbill]

5. probably not the biggest but...

this one came to mind first.

I was going to the gym on campus to workout a few hours before my last class of the day. I ended up strolling past a little bar along the way, and thought," fuck it, it's really hot out, I'll just skip the workout, do some reading and have a beer or two." So I sat down and sipped on several beers for a few hours. Well, I was fully pretty good, not exactly drunk, but buzzing pretty hard, when class rolled around. I still felt I should attend the lecture, and just planned on zoning out and not paying attention since I was impaired. Well, I show up to class, sit down and find out we have a test that day! I didn't study or anything, was about half shot and caught completely by surprise. That being said I somehow squeaked out an A or a B, I can't remember which. Either way it was a miracle I even got more than my name right.

[NewWaveChick1981]

11. Wow...

:yoiks: At least you did reasonably well on the surprise test!

[Wetzelbill]

15. I think a lot of it was common sense

and stuff I could just bs my way through. But then again, I don't remember a whole lot about taking it, haha.

[Aristus]

7. I guess my biggest ever personal WTF moment was when I was a kid.

We were out to dinner with my grandparents (my Dad's folks). My grandmother was a life-long chain-smoker, but luckily, both my mom and dad are non-smokers. Well, Grandma is at her seat in the restaurant, puffing away like a locomotive, and naturally, we kids are coughing and gagging, eyes watering, and unable to eat, and not enjoying the food anyway. I asked Grandma politely not to smoke, and she gave me holy hell for it, telling me I was rude and should respect my elders. Her own grandson! My dad refused to get into a pissing contest with her over the matter, but the next morning, he packed us up summarily and left. Visits to my grandparents were few and far between after that. I always respected my dad for not being a "dutiful son", i.e. "I can't, honey, she's my Ma!" and just doing the right thing.

[NewWaveChick1981]

13. Wow... that had to have made a huge impression on you as a kid...

:yoiks: My grandmother was also a chain smoker and defended her "rights", but she never went that far. She knew when to back off. And I'm glad your dad had sense. :)

[wildhorses]

8. when my daddy told me we were moving again for the 4th

time in 5 years and it was the summer of my senoir year...

:wtf::wtf::wtf::wtf::wtf::wtf::wtf::wtf::wtf::wtf::wtf::wtf::wtf::wtf::wtf::wtf:

[NewWaveChick1981]

14. OMG...

:hug:

[Roon]

29. That's rough

My ex moved approx 30 times with his parents from the time he was a baby until he was 19. When we got a place together he used to say that this was the longest he has lived in one place EVER!! We lived there for 6 years.

[Jokerman]

10. Has to be when my house burned down...

I was at work and the landlord didn't know how to contact me. I was riding my bike up the street thinking about what I was going to have for dinner. The house was set back off of the street so I didn't notice anything was wrong until I rode into the driveway.

The first thing that struck me was that the garage windows were all broken. Next, I noticed that the front door had been literally chopped down. I pretty much fell off my bike when I realized that, through the hole where my front door used to be, I could see clear through to the house behind it.

After standing there dumbfounded for a few minutes I turned to see the older couple sitting on their porch across the street. I approached them and asked "any idea what happened here today"? The man replied in a very matter of fact tone, "Well, your house burned down and the whole neighborhood turned out to watch."

The biggest WTF of all this was when I called my landlord and his secretary told me it was arson. I was pretty freaked out until I talked to the fire marshall and found out the secretary didn't know what she was talking about.

I didn't have renter's insurance but since I was a full time student, my parent's homeowners policy covered the loss.

[NewWaveChick1981]

16. OMFG!!!

What an awful surprise! :hug: I'm glad you were covered at least. But that had to have been terrible. :hug:

[Jokerman]

24. It could have been much worse.

The house was such a dump we used to call it "The Old Haney Place" like in "Green Acres".

The electrical was shit and there were no smoke detectors. The fire marshall said that it spread so fast that if I had been home, I would have been toast.

Loosing all my stuff sucked but starting out the next school year with a big insurance check was an interesting experience.

[KitchenWitch]

12. When I was over 9 months pregnant with my son.

I was standing in a line (not sure if it was a grocery store or another store), this person bumped into me, accidentally, and she immediately said, "Excuse me, Sir, did not mean to bump into you."

:wtf:

I had the largest pregnant belly in the world (or at least it felt like the largest), and I still get mistaken for a man.

[NewWaveChick1981]

17. OMG!

:rofl: At least she was trying to be polite. :P

[KitchenWitch]

18. Yeah, true enough. I think it may have been 2 days later that I delivered

He was 9 lbs 12 oz.

[skygazer]

19. Well, at least it wasn't one of those other occasions

You know, when someone asks you when the baby's due and you're not even pregnant. :grr:

My SO has done that twice to (former) friends. :dunce:

[KitchenWitch]

22. Actually I am not sure which is worse...

I mean, come on people, I was at the exact apex of womanhood...and people still think I am a man.

:rofl:

[AllegroRondo]

25. unless shes wearing a t-shirt that says 'baby on board',

NEVER assume she is pregnant.

[Roon]

31. I never, EVER assume someone is pregnant

Until they tell me they are or they are wearing a baby down below shirt.

[Xithras]

37. Oh, but it's pretty bad the other way as well.

I had a pregnant student in class this semester, and have watched her grow from "barely showing" to "how the hell will she fit into the desk". Two days before the final, she was talking to another student about her due date, when the guy sitting on the other side of her piped up "Oh, you're pregnant? I didn't know that." The pregnant student looked down at her belly, looked at him, and asked if he was blind. He looked at her and without skipping a beat responded, "No, I just thought you were fat."

It would have been funny if she hadn't burst into tears, so I threw his ass out of my classroom. I DID let him take his final, but I have a moral objection to insensitive pricks who insult pregnant ladies in my classroom, so I made him take it on make-up day.

[Der Blaue Engel]

73. Did she look like this?

[lildreamer316]

20. I got hit on in an abortion clinic.

Dead assed serious.

[Wetzelbill]

26. well, I think you win

:)

[NewWaveChick1981]

27. OMFG...

:hug: That's unbelievable!

[lildreamer316]

34. Yes, it 'twas...see below.

[BlueIris]

28. Ladies and gentlemen, the thread is won.

Holy shit.

[lildreamer316]

33. Yeah, it was....surreal.

I really didn't know what to say. I was too taken aback.
Now I wish I had called him on it; but oh well. Discretion being the better part; or whatever.

[BlueIris]

35. No, I think you did the right thing by not inviting him to defend

the indefensible. God knows where that would have gone.

[myrna minx]

52. I was hit on at my brother's funeral by a friend of the family.

He was just trying to, you know, "comfort" me, but I think you definitely win. Wow.

on edit--When I met Crispen Glover, he acted like *I* was the strange one.

[hedgehog]

72. It must have been by a fan of Kevin Smith's!

[SteppingRazor]

21. When Anthony Kiedis of the Red Hot Chili Peppers told me to fuck off...

when I told him to have a good show, just before the band went on stage. :wtf:

[BlueIris]

30. WHAT?

That is terrible.

[SteppingRazor]

38. Y'know what's worse?

I was working as a venue roadie at the time. Basically, work for the venue, helping the roadies of whatever band comes through town to set up the concert. I had just spent all day in backbreaking manual labor, setting up for the Red Hot Chili Peppers/Foo Fighters show. And then Kiedis did that. RHCP are dead to me.

But, for the record, the Foo Fighters were good guys.

[BlueIris]

41. Yeah, that would've killed the love for me, I think.

Blech.

[Roon]

32. That's bad luck

You should have said "break a leg"

[La Lioness Priyanka]

39. you know my biggest wtf moment.

it was a big WTF!!!

[NewWaveChick1981]

43. Yes indeedy!

:hi:

[BlueIris]

40. "John Kerry personally prolonged the Vietnam war TWO EXTRA YEARS!!!"

Screamed in my face by a random Republican while I was trying to register voters in August of 2004. I hadn't yet examined the "substance" of the Swifties' claims, and had no idea that this was a "real" thing people were saying about Kerry. And this guy just walked up to me from out of nowhere and started screaming that. I was so floored.

[LeftyMom]

42. I got a ticket for getting hit by a car when a dozen witnesses said I was not at fault. nt

[NewWaveChick1981]

44. WTF??!!?!?!?!

Geez, how is that even possible? :shrug: :hug:

[BarenakedLady]

45. When

I found a keylogger program installed on my computer at home.

[lildreamer316]

47. Okay; I am blonde...

What is a keylogger program? Sorry.

[BarenakedLady]

48. It

is a program that will log every keystroke you make on your computer for someone to monitor without your knowledge.

[lildreamer316]

49. OOOOOoooooo

That is SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO not cool.
Ever figure out who? Or is that tmi. No biggie. But that would really suck. <shivers>

[BarenakedLady]

50. Oh yes, I know who...

My three children are far too young for that level of computer knowledge. Though I've got my eye on my 7 yr old... ;)

[yy4me]

57. And prey tell, how did you find it? Is this something that shows

up when you run anti-spy-ware and other security programs? Is there something or someplace we computer illiterates should look?

[BarenakedLady]

59. Yes

Most anti-spyware (like Spybot) will catch it. I'm not that computer literate either, it was just by happenstance that I came across it (7 days later).

[cobalt1999]

46. realizing my boat was sinking...

Out in the middle of the bay, cold winter day, noticed we weren't riding quite right, then looked around and saw water...lots of water. No other boats out, no radio, then the dawning realization that we were in serious danger of hypothermia before getting to shore. It was one big WTF!

Lots of hard work tracked down the problem, but by then we only had about a foot of freeboard left. With some serious bailing and a few moments of being sure that a wave would completely swamp us, we managed to limp back to the dock. Frozen, shivering, and with a serious boating lesson under our belts.

[displacedtexan]

51. In the 8th grade, when my niece (4 years older than I)...

... asked me what a banana nut looked like growing on the tree.

(We were eating Banana Nut ice cream at the time.)

:wtf:

[Coventina]

54. My cousin pulled a gun on me and his sister.

And when I called his dad (my uncle) at work to report what happened he told me, "I'll talk to him about when I get home."

:wtf:

Happened more than 20 years ago, but I'm still pretty cheesed off about it.

[Fleshdancer]

55. In Japan....

My daughter was just a few weeks old but my mom was visiting for the first time so my husband and I wanted to show her around. When we stopped at a restaurant, I took my daughter into the bathroom to change her diaper and decided to try to feed her afterward. As I'm trying to get her to latch on, some strange old Japanese woman comes up behind me, grabs my left breast and proceeds to stick my nipple into my daughter's mouth for me. Seriously, who the fuck does that??? I wasn't struggling with it or anything but she really wanted to help I guess. :shrug:

[fudge stripe cookays]

56. Konichi-wa, indeed!

She could have at least said hello first before feeling you up! :rofl:

[carly denise pt deux]

74. LOL LOL LOL

That is too funny....I guess she really wanted to help..that was nice of her I guess LOLOLOLOL

[Fleshdancer]

76. ha! that was the funniest part of the whole ordeal....

I mean, the woman just really wanted to help! For all I know, she could have mothered 8+ kids in her life and perhaps her approach of shoving it all in before the baby has a chance to figure out what the hell is going on really is the best approach but damn...did she expect a silly young gaijin like me to understand her method? :rofl:

BTW, it was a total drive by grab and shove. Once Abby latched, the woman smiled at me and then walked away. Weird and yet comforting at the same time since it really does takes a village and all....

[amitten]

58. When I was in high school, my younger sister (12) and a friend

were watching Road Runner cartoons on TV.

In one scene (as usual) the Coyote falls to his impending non-death from a very high cliff. And what does my sister's friend say?

"You can tell he's on a string!"

A cartoon character. On a string...for safety. :wtf:

I felt like saying, "No, actually that's his stunt double." :rofl:

[Manifestor_of_Light]

62. You should read the humor classic of Coyote v. Acme Products, by Ian Frazier.

Opening arguments of plaintiff's counsel in Wile E. Coyote versus Acme Products Corporation, by Ian Frazier. Originally printed in The New Yorker and later reproduced in The Texas Bar Journal.

"Plaintiff is unable, due to the negligence in design and manufacturing of Defendant's products, to engage in his usual occupation as a predator......"


:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

Funniest legal humor I've ever read.

[querelle]

61. Definitely 9/11

I was in a meeting with my boss in his office when a colleague interrupted us to let us know that a jet had slammed into the WTC. We thought nothing of it at the time, assuming that it was just a tragic accident. The same colleague came back later to tell us that it had happened again at the other tower! That was my WTF moment. A day that I will never forget.

Q

[rockymountaindem]

63. In biology class in 10th grade (classmate and teacher related, no dissection involved)

We had a rather small class of 14 people IIRC. Behind me sat this really cool guy, who shall remain nameless but shall be called Joe Cool for our purposes. This guy was like the surfer dude of Colorado, if that makes any sense. Everybody, myself included, thought quite highly of this guy even though he was frequently the class clown and more than once brought down the wrath of the teacher on the whole class. Anyway...

So, Joe Cool is sitting behind me. Next to him is a girl we shall call Jenny. Everybody knew Jenny had a *lot* of sex with a lot of different people. Jenny, however, tried to maintain the illusion that she, um, didn't do "that thing" with anybody. Everybody knew it was a lie, but she continually refuted the rumors until she was blue in the face. The third player in this scene is our biology teacher, a woman who had to be at least 70 years old if not older. She was a just-the-facts kind of lady who was always nice to you if you were nice to her. Still, you kind of got the feeling she wasn't going to tolerate too many hijinks.

So one day, I don't know how this started, Joe Cool said "penis" at which point Jenny cringed and covered her ears saying "ew... don't say that!". JC starts saying "penis penis penis" as fast as possible just to annoy her. Jenny says "Ms. Teacher, Joe won't stop saying penis!" Teacher replies, "well, Jenny, this is biology class. If we can't discuss that kind of thing here where can anybody discuss it?" JC continues to whisper "penis penis penis" to Jenny unabated for the rest of the day as Jenny continues to freak out. Everybody else was kind of saying, "Jenny, I thought you couldn't get enough of that"... not in so many words, obviously.

So, two days later Joe Cool starts at it again. Teacher is playing solitaire on the computer while we're doing some worksheets. Jenny complains again and teacher shrugs it off. At this point, Joe stands up and drops his pants, returning to his seat in just his boxers. Everybody thinks this is the end for Joe Cool as Jenny goes into a total freak-out and demands that Teacher do *something*.

Teacher, Ms. grouchy old lady, looks up from her game of solitare and says "nice legs, Joe".

Joe sat there with his pants around his ankles until the end of class. Everybody else was in a state of shock.

[1gobluedem]

64. When somebody thought I was a mannequin

I used to help my grandmother in a museum during their town's historic homes tour. I was standing in the basement, ready to demonstrate the 19th century Pullman washstand; moved my arm to start and a woman jumped about five feet in the air and shrieked "She's alive!" I was about 13; was wearing a 1970s-style maxi dress and horn rimmed glasses so I can't imagine why that woman thought I was a mannequin but she sure did.

[kwassa]

82. When I couldn't find the keys ...

Where did I put them, anyways? Middle of the night.

The problem was that the house behind the one we were renting, whose walls were only a few feet away, waw ON FIRE. I could see a giant ball of flame. We needed to leave our house quickly, however we had bars over all the first floor windows, and the front door deadbolt only opened with a key from the inside.

And I couldn't find the key. Talk about a panicked search. I was throwing clothes anywhere, running through the house.

I finally did find them, and we got out. To add to the surreal aspect of it, it was raining an intense cloudburst-type downpour, which didn't affect the fire in the slightest. We were half-dressed, soaking wet, with our indoor and somewhat petrified cats balled up in our arms, and it took the fire department what seemed like hours to get there, while the entire neighborhood was out to watch. The firemen were all casual about it, too, and knocked the fire down in a few minutes. A burning auto in a car port.

[The_Wizard]

65. MY WIFE IS HAVING TRIPLETS!!

We have been going to a fertility doctor. The same one that helped us with our only child/daughter who is 11 months. She calls me the other day and says, "Are you sitting down"... "We are having triplets!". That was 2 weeks ago and it was officially confirmed yesterday. Don't get me wrong... I am thrilled. I love my daughter to no end and I love the idea of more kids. But come on!!

[NewWaveChick1981]

67. OMG!

:hug: :pals: I know you were stunned. But congrats!

Funny triplet story: My husband's good friend from college got married when he was 37 years old (in 1994). His wife (about four years younger) was really, really, REALLY wanting to start a family. About two years after they got married, they decided they wanted three kids, two girls and a boy. Well, a week after that conversation, she got pregnant. And when she was far enough along to tell, she got confirmation from the doc that it was triplets---two girls and a boy. :yoiks: Be careful what you wish for....:P The triplets will be ten in two months. :)

[The_Wizard]

70. Yeh!

That's so cool for your friend! Yep... 10 mon. OY! It was just 11 mons I had a lil' purple baby. Now she's a rocket on knees and about to be on 2 feet.

[Fleshdancer]

77. HOLY CRAP!

Um, so, first and foremost, welcome to DU. Second of all...HOLY CRAP and Congrats of course!!!! Please tell me the two of you live near family. :D

[Rambis]

68. "better if we were both naked"

I was at a party in college and this girl sits down and I say something about it is a nice night but a little warm.
(the stars were out not even thinking about a lame pickup line)
She says..
"yeah, it would be a lot better if we were both naked"

I say, "yeah it would be a lot cooler" and I space off on the stars until she walks away.

I ran into her a week later and she had to explain that she was hitting on me at the party and that she still wanted to get naked. I got it finally:)


Dough!:freak:

[Wetzelbill]

78. yeah I practically have to be chloroformed by a girl to understand

what she means. Little dense about that stuff. :)

[Fleshdancer]

79. So was that a WTF moment for you or for her?

As a woman, I'm inclined to think that was more of a WTF moment for her ;)

[Initech]

69. When I found out the super at my mom's school district gets a $900/month car budget

:wtf:

[ForrestGump]

75. Too many, of late.

DU remains fertile ground for them.

So does Las Vegas.

The biggest I've created, lately, may be a road construction worker somewhere in New Mexico -- two days ago -- who was standing there with his little "Slow" sign (poor dude...though I am happy that the government is giving jobs to people who're not exactly overloaded with IQ) and absentmindedly waving traffic on when he saw me, complete with black hair and sideburns, drive a black '77 Fleetwood Cadillac past him. I'm not sure he knew at that moment, intellectually, exactly what he saw, but got a distinct feeling that he saw something...in the rearview mirror I saw him turned completely around to look at the car as I drove away, his sign hanging by his side and his mouth literally open. I live for that kind of thing... :D

Elvis is everywhere.

[seaglass]

80. At my wedding when the pastor called me Patrick. Not only is my

name not Patrick but I am a female. :wtf:

I couldn't even look at my maid of honor after that because I knew we'd both start laughing and never stop.

[ScreamingMeemie]

81. When I was pregnant with BabyG I guess...

I had just lost two pregnancies and my FIL looked at me and said,"If you lose this one I'll kill you."

Deadly serious.