Worst Country Song

[Parche]

ALL OF THEM

COUNTRY SUCKS!!!!!


Country Music: 'Just the same puke over and over again'

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[Paladin]

1. Now, Now. There Are Good Country Songs And Bad Ones

As far as bad ones, I'll nominate anything Barbara Mandrell has ever done.....

[wildhorses]

2. dude, you ain't drinkin' enough tequila

[Left Is Write]

32. Is it a "Straight Tequila Night"?

or is that just the "Tequila Talking"?

:D

[wildhorses]

44. actually it is a merlot night

and cheap one at that:P

:hi:

[ceile]

3. Now, now...there's a huge difference between old and new.

New country blows, I think we can all agree on that.
But old country-you've got Johnnie Cash, Patsy Cline, Willie, Hank Williams, Sr., all very talented and excceptional singer/song writers.

[Parche]

5. Old country

Yes I have to agree with you there,
Johnny Cash was good, and a few others,


Now days its repetitive, the same, and those over patriotic thugs that drive you nuts
like Toby Keith, Brooks and Dumb.

I swear I could make a country song with both hands tied behind my back

[Mr. Blonde]

39. country like rock music today

is still very good, if you aren't listening to the radio. Most of what is on the radio is trash, but there are very talented artists putting out great stuff.

[wildhorses]

43. oh lordie honey you stepped in to that one

i double dawg dare ya...

post it here:bounce:

both hands tied behind your back

so i assume your are keying it in with your tongue:P

but, really give us a good hook...
something you got from a book


go on lets hear it....

[blitzen]

48. The dividiing line is not "Old" vs. "New"...There are countless great current country

artists--but virtually NONE of them come out of the Nashville Country Radio scene. The good stuff comes out of Austin and the "alt-country" scene.

[Left Is Write]

34. And in between was the country wasteland known as most of the 1980s.

[Gen. Jack D. Ripper]

4. I'm gonna have to agree

I will listen to a lot of different kinds of music, but country music gets me like nails on chalkboard. It's physically taxing to listen to. Now, when I say country music, I mean the top-40 country, pop charts stuff. Your Keith Urbans and your Kenny Chesneys (probably spelled wrong, but I don't care). I like bluegrass, country blues, blues, and folk music. I can even listen to guys like Hank Williams and Johnny Cash from time to time, it's this new stuff that gets me. I remember having to listen to, I don't know who it was, Keith Jackson, I think, a song which started out, "I hear people saying, we don't need this war..." I think the chorus was to the affect of "Have you forgotten (911)." Every time I heard that I'd want to jam sharp objects into my brain and/or go on a killing rampage.

[Beausoleil]

7. Keith Jackson?

Either Toby Keith or Alan Jackson or both, it is all the same crap, I agree.

[Left Is Write]

31. The piece of tripe known as "Have You Forgotten" is by Darryl Worley.

[BOSSHOG]

42. I emailed worley

(or his sight) told him this veteran wanted to know why his spineless cowardly ass wasn't down at the recruiters station if he thought dying in Iraq was so fucking important. No response from the pencil dick.

[Beausoleil]

6. Contemporary Nashville swill

Does suck. Other than that, there is a lot of great songwriting in alt-country, americana, country rock/folk/blues and there are a lot of great classic country songs/artists.

[NightWatcher]

8. David Allen Coe wipes his ass with Brooks and Dunn

and if that aint country, I'll kiss your ass

[Beausoleil]

10. Coe does a great version of

"Driving Wheel", an old Tom Rush song from the early 70s. Great country song, that fits in with the train song thread:

Well I just came up on the midnight special how about that
My car broke down in Texas she stopped dead in her tracks
Just called to tell you that I need you
Just called to tell you how I feel
I feel like some old engine lost my drivin wheel
Feel like some old engine lost my drivin wheel
Took my money on the night train what a terrible fight
I gave my promise I would be there with you by Saturday night
I wanna tell you that I need you baby
I need to tell you just how I feel
I feel like some old engine lost my drivin wheel
Feel like some old engine lost my drivin wheel
Can't say much in a phone call baby you know how it is
I have to tell you one short thing oh won't you listen to this
I want to tell you that I love you baby
I want to tell you just how I feel
I feel like some old engine lost my drivin wheel
Feel like some old engine lost my drivin wheel

[Rambis]

9. WTF is ka donk a donk?

I have no idea where I was when I heard something like that but you can bet I left asap.

[Parche]

11. donk

And that song about baseball......"Hey batter batter hey.....

Real song writing abilities these new country slugs have!!! :puke:

[BOSSHOG]

13. But how does that make you feel?

"All country sucks?" Please share .. have you had a bad honkey tonk experience? Do steel guitars make you cry? How bout country songs about submarines??

[Parche]

14. Country Sub

Ok BOSS, if they made a Country song about a submarine, I would have to say I would listen
to it!!!! :rofl: :hi:






I just cant stand all of the phony patriots that sing those songs.........

and if you heard 1 country song played on the radio, the next one sounds the same......

[BOSSHOG]

16. I've emailed

toby keith and darryl worley telling them to get their flag waving asses down to the army recruting station. They were so fucking brave they failed to answer my message. I do have my favorite C&W performers: Alan Jackson, Patti Loveless, Sammy Kershaw, Keith Whitley (whose been dead for 18 years), Dwight Yokum, Tim Mcgraw.

Country Sub:

I joined the Navy and got a ride on a sub
She's sailed the Seas and always went down
She's taken me around the world, I really love that old tub
She goes down but my girlfriend won't back in my hometown
So I'll ride her till they kick me out
go home to my girl and live my life doing without.

then 30 seconds of howling at the moon.

Country songs may be bad but they are easy to write

[Bake]

27. There haven't been any steel guitars in country music in YEARS!

And that makes me sad ... fiddles been missing too ...

Bake

[Oeditpus Rex]

15. XM radio uses a bit of that

in one of its promos for ball games. Every time I hear it, I wanna yell, "'Swang' this, you redneck assbucket! It's not Little League!"

:grr:

'Course, they also use a sound clip from "Baseball Bugs," so they aren't all bad.

"WHAM! A homaaa! WHAM! Anudda homaaa! WHAM! WHAM! WHAM!"

[RetroLounge]

12. Now now, there are redeeming qualities

for example, on that album cover, the guitar is a GIBSON LES PAUL!

:D

RL

[Bake]

28. Which of course makes it NOT country ...

Everybody knows that country pickers play Telecasters ...

By the way, for those who don't know, Brad Paisley has some definite CHOPS on the Telecaster. There ARE some good players. Marty Stuart is another one.

Bake

[HughBeaumont]

17. OLD C&W is great.

NEW Country sucks the balls of the recently deceased.

[Beausoleil]

18. Here's the perfect country song

Another DAC song, written by Steve Goodman:

It was all that I could do to keep from cryin'
Sometimes it seems so useless to remain
You don't have to call me darlin', darlin'
You never even call me by my name.

You don't have to call me Waylon Jennings
And you don't have to call me Charlie Pride.
You don't have to call me Merle Haggard, anymore.
Even though your on my fightin' side.

CHORUS
And I'll hang around as long as you will let me
And I never minded standin' in the rain.
You don't have to call me darlin', darlin'
You never even call me by my name.

I've heard my name a few times in your phone book
I've seen it on signs where I've laid
But the only time I know, I'll hear David Alan Coe
Is when Jesus has his final judgement day.

CHORUS...

Well, a friend of mine named Steve Goodman wrote that song
and he told me it was the perfect country and western song.
I wrote him back a letter and told him it was NOT the perfect
country and western song because he hadn't said anything about
Momma, or trains, or trucks, or prison, or gettin' drunk.

Well, he sat down and wrote another verse to the song and he sent
it to me and after reading it, I realized that my friend had written
the perfect country and western song. And I felt obliged to include it
on this album.

The last verse goes like this here:

Well, I was drunk the day my Mom got outta prison.
And I went to pick her up in the rain.
But, before I could get to the station in my pickup truck
She got runned over by a damned old train.

CHORUS
So I'll hang around as long as you will let me
And I never minded standin' in the rain. No,
You don't have to call me darlin', darlin'
You never even call me, I wonder why you don't call me
Why don't you ever call me by my name.

[LaraMN]

19. I just don't dig it when men wear tighter jeans than I do.

:scared:

[SteppingRazor]

20. I kind of agree with you, as far as contemporary, mainstream country, but...

old-school country kicks ass — Willie Nelson, Johnny Cash, and so on.

And, even with contemporary stuff, some of my favorite music gets put out in the alt-country subgenre —folks like Wilco, Ryan Adams, etc.

So, all in all, I think it's too generally to just say country sucks. Some of it's great.

[jakefrep]

21. I have a theory about country music....

Since all of the men sound the same, and all of the women sound the same, I believe that there are really only two country singers - one male, one female - locked away in the basement of a Nashville recording studio. All of the performers you see on stage and in videos are just the redneck equivalent of Milli Vanilli.

[BOSSHOG]

45. I have a theory

about people who have theorys about country music. They don't listen to it. Dwight Yokum sounds like Alan Jackson? Patty Loveless sounds like Winona Judd? Marty Stewart sounds like Sammy Kershaw? Reba Mcantire sounds like Trisha Yearwood. I think you are the ignorant equivalent of Millie Vanilli. If you don't like the jukebox, save your quarters. Please tell me what you like so I can share a few lines of trash for no apparent reason.

[alarimer]

22. Try listening to some alternative country

otherwise known as Americana. It includes such diverse acts as Wilco, Son Volt, Uncle Tupelo (the precursor of both the previous bands), Robbie Fulks ("Fuck this town"- apparently he didn't have a good time in Nashville) and many, many others.

[MysticalChicken]

59. I like Wilco and Son Volt.

I also like Drive-By Truckers and Old 97s. I like them because they don't sound like country music, it's not "my dog ran away and my wife stole my pickup"-type lyrics.

I loathe most other country music as well. I think it's the twangy guitars.

[alarimer]

60. Well for me I can't stand anything on mainstream country radio

It is, I admit, something of a knee-jerk reaction and somewhat prejudiced but to me if it is popular, "mainstream" country, it is crap. Even if Tim McGraw and Faith Hill are Democrats, I hate their music. They sometimes pick good songs but then butcher them. Please, Tim, for all that is holy, leave Ryan Adams the hell alone! He might like the paycheck but you cannot do it justice.

I like some twang myself.

A good record is Southern Culture on the Skids Countrypolitan Favorites, where they take some old country songs (and some very obscure ones) and give it their treatment. They do Tobacco Road, Wolverton Mountain and I never Promised you a Rose Garden (I have always likes this song for some reason and this is a really good cover) and Oh Lonesome Me.

[no name no slogan]

23. Not ALL country sucks

but all broad generalizations DO.

/ Neko Case, Gram Parsons, Jeff Tweedy, Chris Hillman, Dave Alvin, John Doe and many, many other contemporary "rock" artists would agree with me, too.

[Burma Jones]

24. Hank Williams, Johnny Cash and Willie Nelson

Patsy Cline, The Carter Family, Bill Monroe, Doc Watson, Bob Wills and the Texas Playboys

are just a few of Country Music's absolute geniuses....

But, I gotta go with the crowd on today's Country Music, like most commercial music, it's McDonald's for the ears.....

[Beausoleil]

25. Just listened to the new Charlie Louvin CD today

Check it out!

When you listen to the Louvin Brothers' music, you see where Gram and Emmylou got a lot of their inspiration. Covered a lot of Louvin Bros.

[Beaverhausen]

26. Great list. I have to add some of the artists today that are on the Americana side

including Lucinda Williams, Lyle Lovett, Ryan Adams, Dwight Yoakum, Alison Krauss, Nickel Creek, etc.

It's not all bad!

[Left Is Write]

33. Let me add Rosanne Cash to that list.

[Coyote_Bandit]

49. Let me add

Steve Earle and Kris Kristofferson.

[TommyO]

29. Well, if you're talking about Brooks & Dunn - you might be right

but there are a few out there that are great, and very Democratic.

Tim McGraw and Faith Hill put out some good music, and Tim has already stated that he eventually will get into TN politics. Mary Chapin Carpenter is a fantastic singer/song-writer; her most recent release, The Calling, puts her politics front and center with "One With The Song".

Do a quick Google search for the lyrics, or sample it on iTunes.

edited to add: Can't forget the Dixie Chicks who have suffered for their unwavering opposition to George Bush.

[Common Sense Party]

30. 3 Words: Mary Chapin Carpenter n/t

[SteppingRazor]

35. You're only helping the OP's case!

:hide:

[TommyO]

37. Hey, don't mess with MCC!

No wonder you're hiding in your bunker.

[Common Sense Party]

58. Not at all. Chapin is the real deal, who doesn't give a damn

about kissing the Nashville suits' asses. She knows how to write her own songs, real stories about real people in real situations.

She is everything that corporate Nashville isn't.

Consequently, she's not played on country stations anymore.

But she still plays "country."

[Crazy Dave]

36. "She thinks my tractor's sexy"

I don't know who sings it. It's not a parody or meant to be funny either. Pure "gitterdun" stuff.

[alarimer]

40. I think that was Kenny chesney

Or Kenny fucking Chesney as I usually refer to him

[BOSSHOG]

41. As opposed to

Back that thing up bitch. I'd rather she find my tractor sexy!

[LSK]

38. try listening to the Dixie Chicks or Rosanne Cash

Not all of it sucks.

[bridgit]

46. i suppose you're a Lynard Skynard 'smell that smell' kind of, ahem, individual...

Better Things To Do :headbang:

[blitzen]

47. Wow, I've never heard that before! I guess I should throw out my

collection of 1000s of country CDs which I listen to all the time (none of which are by an artist that would ever be played on Country Radio), since I now realize that they suck!

[Adsos Letter]

50. Just curious...

Does "The Ballad of the Green Berets" fit anywhere in this? 'Cause I heard Sgt. Barry Sadler sing that thing for the first time on (I think it was Ed Sullivan) and I've not been quite the same since. Not in a good way, either...

[carly denise pt deux]

51. ANY country song from 1989 on is a virtual barf-fest

Big n Rich is the worst I have ever heard......rap and country should NEVER cross planes

Carly

[Adsos Letter]

53. I gotta' agree with ya'...the best stuff I remember

is what my dad used to listen to during the 60's and early 70's on KRAK radio ("The KRAK Corral of Country Hits!) out of Sacramento.

Try getting away with that name and slogan now-a-days...

Lots of Willie Nelson, the late Waylon Jennings, Tammy Wynette, George Jones, Marty Robbins, Tom T. Hall, Merle Haggard, Hank Williams (junior and senior), those Sgruggs fellers, etc, etc.

And I'm no big fan of CW, but I enjoyed the older stuff...won't listen to the new...

[carly denise pt deux]

56. Me too......anything from the 60's and 70's was great stuff

Carly

[wildhorses]

52. ok---tell me this chick ain't hot

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fJy6mU32GEk

[brentspeak]

54. Just like there's a lot of good and bad rock music, there's a lot of good and bad country music

[Benfea]

55. Agreed. All of them.

Country and Western is the soundtrack of evil, and the genre is full of talentless hacks. When I lived in the South, I new jazz musicians who occasionally ran off to Nashville for "quick and easy money: you learn three chords, you know five songs."

[cloudbase]

57. Don't Squeeze My Charmin

and Dropkick Me Jesus

About as bad as it ever got.

[Elidor]

61. Those two guys are the epitome of everything that sucks about new country

Repackaged cliches wrapped in plastic, sanitized for your protection.

[Release The Hounds]

62. Death to country music.