If Shrub were a shrub, what kinda shrub would Shrub be?

[gardenista]

I'm thinking he would be some sort of shrub that can survive only with extraordinary amounts of maintenance and special soil. Like, if you didn't water it for one day, it would get all crispy and lose all its leaves.

I think it would have lots of hidden thorns beneath the rather dull foliage, with abundant blooms of seemingly scentless and almost invisible red flowers. However, the blossoms would release their scent only at night, as they would be pollinated by shit-eating flies.

I would call this shrub Ignoramus assimus 'Bunnypants'

what about you, what kinda shrub do you think Shrub is?

[MrSlayer]

1. A thistle. All thorns, no fruit.

I think that's what it's called anyway.

[GOPisEvil]

2. Something ugly and thorny with no value whatsoever.

[GURUving]

3. the kinda shrub that would say "hey bub"

stop it, you're scarin' me

edit forgot: with yer pee

[gardenista]

6. What is it that frightens you about our little specimen?

The thorns or the shit-eating fly pollinators?

LOL! Just saw your edit!

Is that a song?

[shanti]

4. poison oak

n/t

[gardenista]

7. Yeah, I think we'll still be scratchin the irritation for years and years

to come!

[camero]

5. A tumbleweed

because it just goes wherever the wind blows.

[Deja Q]

8. Laburnum. The pods are poisonous, often fatal.

And BFEE is nothing but toxic waste as it is.

[gardenista]

10. yes, it may look good, but it's deadly, especially in the wrong hands.

And believe me, this shrub is in the WRONG hands

[gardenista]

9. Cheap and easy to propagate. Referred to as a "fast grower"

by irreputable catalogs.

This means that it takes over your garden and smothers everything of value, leaving a biologically barren monoculture. No more butterflies, no more little cute birds, no more hedgehogs.

I think even Oscar would hate this shrub, and might even hurt his fur on it.

[funkyflathead]

11. Ground locust n/t

[mmm]

12. fart blossom

[mitchtv]

13. that's easy , a dingleberry

complete with limbaugh warts

[gardenista]

17. ROFL! nt

.

[11 Bravo]

14. A small, thorny, really insignificant growth.

The kind that even the EPA (back when we really had one) would say, "Ah, fuck it. Let this one become extinct."

[GoddessOfGuinness]

15. Skunk Cabbage

Thrives in fetid mucky soil and smells like its name.

[gardenista]

16. OMG, what is that pic? Is that Oscar?! nt

.

[Neshanic]

23. A parastical mistletoe that sucks the life out of the living

[alittlelark]

18. definitely pyracantha

Quite thorny, with inedible berries. Can look attractive from far away when groomed well, yet twisted and ugly when you look under the leaves. Highly vulnerable to FIRE BLIGHT - Democrats will be inducing that this year!

[gardenista]

19. AND I'm allergic to it! Just like Shrubbie! nt

[Cleita]

20. Yeah, he'd be some hothouse type like a smelly tropical plant

that only blooms once in awhile, but stinks like hell, yet you have to make sure his temperature, humidity, soil and plant food is just so.

[mitchum]

21. The kind my dog pisses on

[Mikimouse]

22. A Crapapple!

n/t

[carols]

24. A plastic one

:-)
Carol

[SoCalDem]

25. Easy.....Stink Weed

:)

[rexcat]

26. A noxious one...

but he probably would be poisonous also!

[Endangered Specie]

27. Kudzu, or some other weed.

[Lostmessage]

28. What is that horrible shrub that crawls the side of your house?

When you try to kill it the thing won't die and it keep growing and covering your house.