I have new, very strange neighbors

[Quixote1818]

I have lived at this house for ten years and have had 4 different neighbors to my left. The other three neighbors were all wonderful and some would even have their boy mow my lawn when I was gone for a week or two.

On the side of my drive way, which I always thought of as the neighbors yard is about a two foot section that I guess is really owned by me, even though it appears to be in their yard and is connected to their yard. All the other neighbors use to mow this 2 foot by 10 foot section as they mowed their front yard. After all it's in-front of their house, not mine. It looks like everyone in the neighborhood does the same thing and I mow the two foot section on the other side that is owned by the other neighbors. It would seem insane and rude not to!

Anyway, these new people never mow their lawn and the yard looks like crap, but when they do mow their lawn they leave that two foot section along the side of my driveway un-mowed??? At first I just thought that their mower broke down or ran out of gas, but it stayed that way for two weeks. Then they mowed their lawn again and left the same spot un-mowed????? I was like "What the fuck is wrong with them." So I went out to the street and noticed the place they stopped cutting lined up with my fence in the back and it occurred to me that they are trying to tell me that they don't have to mow that section because it's "technically" not owned by them. Technically they are correct but when it comes down to common sense and being a good neighbor it's the cool, normal and nice thing to do. They are very strange people and never even wave or say hello when I see them.

I haven't mowed it yet. Eventually I will probably give in and mow it because it looks like crap but I sure am not impressed by these new ass holes who I have to now live next to.

Any thoughts?

[DS1]

1. is all they do is not mow often, and when they do, not mow your area?

that was always typical in New Jersey, people eventually worked it out without a word being spoken

[Lars39]

2. Consistent maintenance over the years can sometimes lead to ownership

in some parts of the country, iirc some of the other DU threads on the subject. :shrug:

[Gormy Cuss]

3. Mow it and don't think twice.

It's the simplest solution. From your description it's your strip of grass. That you and the other neighbors do this little favor is nice, but it sounds like you have no idea why the neighbor ignored it and it is on your property.

[Quixote1818]

5. You are probably right.

I guess I should just mow it and be done with it. It's not worth us going round and round and it escalating.

[greatauntoftriplets]

4. Take care of your own property???

It's quite nice that you ex-neighbors did that for you. But you can't expect it to continue forever!!!!

Take responsibility for your own property.

[Quixote1818]

6. Should I then stop mowing the two foot section on the other side?

My other neighbors would think I am insane. But under the law you are correct.

[rug]

7. Simmer down, Cheney.

[greatauntoftriplets]

15. I beg your pardon.

Don't you DARE call me Cheney !!!

[Lyric]

8. To be the devil's advocate...

Perhaps they're afraid that if they mowed something that belongs to you, you might think they're trying to "claim" that piece of your property as their own, and would be offended.

I only say this because it's a situation I've dealt with too, but I was on the other side of it--I was afraid that my neighbors would think I was trying to claim that strip of ground as "my" yard. Of course, my solution was to just go talk to them about it, and I was assured that my mowing a strip of their property would be considered a kindness, not an imposition. Perhaps you could try approaching them?

[Blue Diadem]

16. Around here, it's "if you mow it you own it"

I was informed of that when I had neighbors fighting over my back yard shortly after we moved here. It definitely explained why several of them had made a point when first meeting us of telling us they mowed "our" yard during the time the house sat vacant.

For a good long time after we moved in, my 400 ft yard looked like a checkerboard from various neighbors' mowing techniques. I'm not talking just a foot or two or three. Once we asserted our land ownership, one neighbor told her friends that we stole her property(even though a 12 ft strip of village land is between us) Another neighbor had even erected a full sized soccer goal..permanently cemented into the ground smack in the middle of our yard.

I'm like you..I'd be afraid to mow anything that wasn't mine without first talking to the property owner.

[UTUSN]

9. :You are a DUer/friend after my own heart!!1

I've struggled for YEARS over "neighbors" - and talked to City. Various problems: PARTIES with vehicles PARKED in front of MY house, although WE know it's a PUBLIC street...



Anyway, your post hit a cord...

[lizerdbits]

13. I think I live next to your neighbors relatives

Sounds exactly like mine except for the parking in front of my place. Finally called the cops last week since they thought 4:15am was a great time to blast some music while also being loud on their patio.

[BlueJazz]

10. I wouldn't take any Crap from them. Are you a Man or a mouse??

I say: Burn the Bastards out!!!

[Joe Fields]

11. Yes. I believe you are making too much of the situation.

It really isn't that big of a deal.

[lost-in-nj]

12. Have you checked

the property lines made by the
surveyors????
Maybe that part belongs to you....
:hi:

lost

[LibDemAlways]

14. I'd just mow it and be done with it. They don't sound too

friendly or approachable, so you're best off just accepting that they consider that little section yours and they aren't going to touch it.

As for being unneighborly, the woman who lives across the street from me is the worst I've ever experienced. One evening I was out for a walk and saw her and her husband approaching. (He's the neighborhood busybody and talks to everybody.) About two houses before she would have passed me, she crossed the street to avoid saying anything. Husband looked embarrassed and said hello. I have never spoken with this woman or given her any reason to dislike me, but she sure makes it obvious. Some people are just very strange.

[My Good Babushka]

17. I guess it could be a misunderstanding

We've gotten very lucky with neighbors this time. My neighbor just gave me 5 big hostas and a hydrangea this spring, because she decided she wanted roses instead. I'm trying hard not to kill all my new plants.

[KatyMan]

18. That's the way in Texas too

You'd mow the common strip between the houses when you mowed, but sometimes I felt I shouldn't because I always kept our grass like putting green short (so I didn't have to mow as often), but some people like their grass with a little height. Maybe they just don't know it's common courtesy?

This could also be one of those 'wind people up' threads, like the one a few months ago where the guy wouldn't drink with his wife's friends...! :P

[Richardo]

20. Wait a sec. I'd think you'd have to mow *more* often to keep the grass short

:shrug:

[KatyMan]

21. Maybe I dinna 'splain correctly

Mow it down to the dirt and you don't have to mow again for a few weeks ;) In Houston, if you keep your grass at say an inch or inch and a half high, you mow every week. Make your lawn bald and you only mow every few weeks. Mowing the lawn in Houston in the summer is one of Dante's circles of hell, no lie.

[Richardo]

23. I live here - I know

I waited until well after sundown to mow yesterday and by the time I was done I had sweated through every article of clothing I had on.

I'm a high-mower so the grass retains moisture better.

[Random_Australian]

19. Yeah, I have a thought.

If it is clear that it is 'technically' your property, they may just not want to cross social lines, ya know.

:hi:

It also occurs to me that either of us could be right, and it finally occurs to me that there is no point in standing around thinking up possible scenarios to why they didn't mow it and what they are trying to tell you when you can ask them.

Seriously, the amount of times people get each other the wrong way around because they are acting under different social rules is ridiculous. Getting to know someone is the only way of getting to know someone.

Not that I'm trying to be confrontational or anything - I've just seen things like this happen too many times. :)

[Robb]

22. Soak your section with water, and burn theirs with kerosene.

It's the only way they'll learn. If you burn their cars, it'll really drive the point home. :D

I actually have something similar, and it's always been whoever's got the mower out hits the little "shared" spot. That's usually me.

[Tsiyu]

24. Getting used to new neighbors is a challenge

I have posted mean and hateful things about the family who bought two parcels of land near me.

I am happy to report we are all getting along much better these days; it just took them a while to get used to the ways of the hood.

Now, when they shoot off fireworks, they come let me know so i can move the horses. They no longer park their vehicles all over the right-of-way, and they are pretty friendly and just working on their properties and getting along like everyone else.

i think sometimes people are scared when they move to a new community so they either act cold/aggressive to hide their sense of social isolation.

Go out of your way to mow that spot for now. Bring them some cookies or something and eventually you can explain to them how you do things.

Good luck!

[Connonym]

25. I had sort of the opposite problem

In my last house my neighbors had become accustomed to cutting the grass all the way to my driveway when the last owner lived there. I always felt that was a bit intrusive and presumptuous to be cutting my grass. When I did cut it myself they had the temerity to complain that it now wasn't the same height as theirs and requested that I let them cut it. I took it as them being bossy and not knowing their boundaries.

Instead of assuming your neighbor is being an asshole, perhaps it would be best to assume that she/he is attempting to be polite by acknowledging lot lines and they are not aware of your local custom. I've had some really shitty neighbors over the years but I think it's always best to at least start by giving them the benefit of the doubt.

Unfortunately, neighborhood dynamics change.

[skygazer]

26. Yeah. My thought is you've given very little reason to call them assholes

It's your lawn. They may not realize the neighborhood "rules." They may have never lived in a regular neighborhood before. They may not want to overstep their boundaries.

Why do people always jump to the most negative possible conclusion?

Have you introduced yourself? In my world, it was always polite to introduce oneself and welcome the new neighbor. It was a good time to let them know the little quirks of the neighborhood like the fact that they'd be burned in effigy if they didn't mow your 2 foot strip of lawn. :eyes:

[AngryAmish]

27. Deal with them in a Punic fashion

Plow salt into their lawn.

[jobycom]

28. I'm afraid I'm more like your neighbor than like you.

First, when I lived in a house, my lawn was never very pretty. At times it was ugly. I just obsess about things other than yards.

Second, until you've lived in a neighborhood for a while, you don't know its customs. Maybe they are new to living in a house. Maybe their old neighborhood had the opposite customs. Maybe they are nervous about mowing someone else's yard. I know I lecture my kids to stay off the neighbors' lawns unless invited, and I stay off, too. My house had a small section between the driveway and the neighbor's yard. Some neighbors mowed it for us, some didn't, and some fluctuated, but any time I mowed, I mowed my section, whether it had recently been mowed or not. I don't feel right wandering into someone else's yard without permission, even if it's just a narrow little strip.

As for them being stand-offish, maybe they are just private, or shy, or both.

[hedgehog]

29. What is this "lawn mowing" of which you speak?

[Dyedinthewoolliberal]

30. Mow it and forget about it

It's not worth the hassle and stress :)