Question about Message I Recieved on Myspace : Might Crosspost in GLBT forum.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

"Hi - How are you? I was just doing a search on myspace and came across your profile and just wanted to drop a line and say you were pretty. I am Gay, as well. Just to introduce my self, I am XXX. Being Gay and Indian, my family is looking to get me married. Of course, I am not out to them and looking for a girl who may be seeking the same thing. I am not sure if you know any one that have a need for something similar to this. I am a US citizen so I am not looking for any money or green card or any thing of that nature. Just looking for a girl who also needs the same thing. Please let me know. Thanks.

Regards,

XXX"

Any how my question is: Would it be wrong of me to ask him to come out already? He doesnt live in India, so there is no threat to his life/well being. All of us face adversity when we come out, and closeted living is neither good for the individual nor for glbt right.


ON EDIT: for clarification.. i dont want to yell at this guy, i have been in this position in my life. i would just like him to know that he has choices.

[Bunny]

1. So, he's a gay guy who is looking for a gay girl to get married to, so both can

appease their families by getting married? :shrug:

Yeah, tell him to come out.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

2. yes, i think he is in his mid-late 20's and lives in ny.

so i dont think coming out would ruin his life or anything.

[pagerbear]

3. This email screams "Ignore me and forget about the sender!"

[La Lioness Priyanka]

7. so no little self righteous lecture?

damn pagerbear, you ruin all my fun! :P

[pagerbear]

8. You think he'd listen? I don't.

[MonkeyFunk]

4. He sounds like a nice boy

marry him!

You'll get gifts!


:P

[La Lioness Priyanka]

6. tee hee

:P

[Nickster]

15. There is something to be said for all the great gifts. Some even give you money!

[La Lioness Priyanka]

16. i wonder how rockit would feel if a married someone else.

even for gifts. i suspect she would be sad. and i dont want to make her sad. :)

[Nickster]

23. Well, tell her that she can get married too. Then you get double the gifts! See...win-win!

[Left Is Write]

5. I would delete the message and ignore him.

If you start engaging him, he may never leave you alone.

[Rising Phoenix]

9. nothing but trouble

tell him to come out....:loveya:

[La Lioness Priyanka]

12. well part of me wants to right a saga on how i felt much the same way

till i came out, and how the losses were worth it etc.

and another part of me feels like this could sound presumptious.

[liontamer]

10. well considering you were planning on doing the same thing even after you came out to your parents

maybe he just wants to make his grandparents happy, or keep his inheritence, or create a unit for raising children without compromising his sexuality. :shrug:
It doesn't hurt to tell him you can't help, but encourage him to come out to make the world a better place and to increase his own happiness. But there's no need to lecture him.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

11. this is why i would tell him, because i know how he feel somewhat

edit: and yes i did ask to avoid lecturing the guy. keeping ones inheritance is important. dimma bought me some really nice rubies :bounce:

one second edit: he also says hes not out at all.

[Gormy Cuss]

13. Update your Myspace page.

Seriously -- how did he get the impression you would be interested in this?

If he's in his 20s, lives in NY, and hasn't figured out that closeted living is not good, I'm guessing that nothing you say will change that.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

14. my myspace page just says i want to meet queer indians to go dancing with

not to go around marrying.

[Heidi]

17. Please be compassionate with him, lionesspriyanka.

It sounds like he has one foot in each world. :hug:

Edited for missing comma.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

18. i will. i have been there. i should have included that in the OP.

its not that i think hes a bad person or even cowardly, i think he feels this is his only option.

and i would like to let him know that it isnt.

[Heidi]

24. I think letting him know he has other options

is one of the most kind things anyone could do for him. Thank you for that. :hug:

[Katina]

19. be careful

he may just be some smart ass or he may be something worse. I would really be suspicious of an out of the blue message like that.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

20. thanks for the warning.

pri

[Katina]

21. it's the mom in me

something like that gets my gut in knots. Too much information shared too quickly reeks of either a phoney or a set up. There are weird people out there.

[cwydro]

22. you have no way of knowing if he is telling the truth anyway.

If he is, yeah, tell him to come out. On one hand I feel sorry for him if he is on the level and looking for a friend to talk to.

But on the other hand, I kinda agree with others here, just ignore it.

Ah well, go with your feelings, but be careful.