Don't you think it's ironic...

[kimmerspixelated]

as young women we are taught, hopefully, to ignore boys that pressure us for sex. These boys promise they might dump us if we don't put out. But we realize they are not good enuf for us, so we move on. But in a marriage, if the woman decides she doesn't want to put out as often, then the man almost always moves on, perhaps dumps her in the end. Why is it that sex is so God-damned important to men!!
Orm why is it that men will go to almost any length to "get some"!!

[skygazer]

1. Society is an illogical creation in many ways

Marriage is not a natural state. Neither is monogamy. Sex is necessary for a species to continue. The desire for it is built in.

Society builds rules that often contradict all of the above.

And sex is important because it releases stress, relaxes people and it's darn fun to boot. For both men and women.

[kimmerspixelated]

6. Oh, don't get me wrong!

Sex is great! But usually when women are hot and they don't have a man nearby, they usually enjoy a little self love! But...Some men seem to think it's okay to find an internet friend and then actually meet them at a motel if they can't get their woman to put out more than twice a month! I'm sorry... I have a prob with that!

[LeftyFingerPop]

7. if they can't get their woman to put out...

can't "get" their women to...

There's one problem right there...

[skygazer]

8. Some women don't have a problem with doing the same thing

Quite honestly, I think sex is a big part of an intimate relationship. And I think it's a part that each member has to recognize as important. If one partner wants sex more often than the other, a compromise is in order.

In plenty of relationships, it's the woman who demands more. And in either case, I think it's only fair that the partner who has a lesser libido owes it to the other to make an effort. I don't always feel like doing the dishes either, but I do them.

And honestly, the way you characterize it makes me wonder just what kind of view you have of sex. "if they can't get their woman to put out more than twice a month" is a strange and sort of disturbing statement.

[LeftyFingerPop]

2. why is it that men will go to almost any length to "get some"!!

Your comment is a sweeping generalization on so many levels.

Why is sex lacking? What else is missing?

A lot of men that I know, as they age, are willing to forgo sex as long as other elements are there...such as mutual respect, admiration and affection.

"Getting some" is for rookies.

[kimmerspixelated]

3. True,

I was pissed when I wrote it. But you're right . Mutual respect, admiration, etc. should be tops!

[LeftyMom]

4. I see a lot of generalizations there.

I never once was pressured into sex before I was ready. I never had a guy dump me because I didn't put out (and unlike a lot of these "technical virgins" I wasn't doing everything but.)

Then again, as a sexually mature adult woman, I've never once had a relationship with a guy who was unsatisfied with my sex drive.

I think there are a lot of generalizations in your post that are kinda dated and stereotypical in their look at sexuality and gender roles.

[Danger Mouse]

5. Way to generalize!

I'm a horny perv, to be sure, but to imply that I'll go to almost any lengths to 'get some' is just silly! Honestly, I can think of many many more things more important to me in a relationship than sex. Although, I should add, I think it is a good component of a healthy relationship.

[northzax]

9. how is this ironic?

seems like you are describing a consistent pattern (yes, with generalizations) if a guy won't date you if you won't 'put out' why are you suprised that he doesn't want to be married to you if you won't put out?

[LeftyFingerPop]

10. One other comment

I feel that too many people view sex as a stand alone commodity...it is not. It is an extension of us.

Sex without love is nothing more than masturbation while using another person. Now, that may have its place in certain circumstances...but when people speak of "getting some", I think of this kind of sex.

Real sex is a mental as well as a physical connection. When sex drops off in a marriage, it usually means that part of the mental connection has been broken, and that can be due to many things: stress, worry, health, loss of emotional bonding, falling out of love, etc.

The trick is to figure out what is causing the loss of interest in sex, and then try to fix THAT problem...that is when the intimacy returns. If the underlying problem cannot be fixed, then neither can the sex.

[Nikia]

11. Their sex toys must not be as good

The few guys who I have asked have either denied ever using them or said that their sex toys are very inferior to the real thing even from just the physical aspect of it.

[Joe Fields]

12. We went through this very thing about a week ago.

My take? When there is no interest in giving pleasure, then there are underlying reasons. If one is unwilling to address THOSE reasons, then why stay married? Life is too fucking short, and we have a right to be happy.

[alcibiades_mystery]

13. Oh wow

[DutchLiberal]

14. Evolution.

Check it out.

[Wapsie B]

15. It's not necessarily the woman doesn't want to put out as often

as much as the coupling is a bad sexual match to begin with. Women want that sexual fulfillment too. And there's nothing wrong with that. There's various degrees to relationships. There's the one-night stands. Then there's the relationship where the sex is ok but everything else leads to a deep friendship with the other person. At the top I would put those who have found a sexual, spiritual, emotional, and intellectual mate, where you cannot get enough of the other person, body and soul. The desire for a fulfilling sexual bond extends to women as well as men.

[Rabrrrrrr]

16. Why is it that women get so goddamned frigid after they've roped the man into financial slavery?

There's - how's that for a generality?

:eyes:

[BlueJazz]

17. You Silly, Silly Woman...There's a Logical Explanation.