so... my son's moving in with me

[MissMillie]

And we're going to have a written contract about what is and what isn't acceptable. And I'm pretty sure this will include my having some oversight over his finances (I've never seen money slip through anyone's fingers like it does my kid's).

Yes, he's smoking pot, and while some of you will say that this is ok, I say it is not ok when he can't afford to feed himself. So, there'll be none of that. (If I can convince him to give up cigarettes, that would be wonderful too.)

I'm hoping I can convince him that he needs to stay long enough not to just get out of debt and afford the expenses to move out, but to set aside a nest egg for a rainy day. There's no point in him leaving sooner (rather than later) if one car repair is going to make him short on rent.

There also can be no arguments. I should not have to fight with him to get him to do 45 minutes worth of chores every other day.

And his life cannot interrupt mine. I need to be able to sleep at night (so it has to be quiet) and I should be able to have some sense of when to expect him home when he's out.

I know that some suggested that he not live w/ me but that I just help him out financially. I really don't have enough extra in my monthly budget to do that. So here he comes.

More than anything we need to talk to each other and treat each other with love. And that means reasonable requests have to be honored. There's nothing worse than having someone say "no" to just about everything you ask. It makes you feel unimportant and unloved. I won't live like that. I'd rather live alone and have to do it all myself than have someone (figuratively speaking) tell me to "go to hell" everytime I ask for something.

[mainegreen]

1. Ung. Us boys really suck at that age don't we?

Sorry.

Still, if he's got any common sense at all he'll be appreciative, especially when he finds himself rising out of that financial pit he's in.

Good luck.

[bigwillq]

2. Good Luck.

That's all I could offer.


:hug:

[Crazy Dave]

3. Watch out for the entitlement attitude

Adult children (like all of ours) feel entitled to everything that's yours and claim that it's your obligation to give it to them.

[ThomCat]

4. I hope this works for both of you.

I hope he learns and grows from this. :hug:

Was it decided that he's not bringing his girlfriend with him?

[MissMillie]

5. she has somewhere to go

and she's not a girlfriend, just a friend.

I would have taken her too, but it's going to be cramped w/ just two of us, nevermind 3. I hope she visits often. She's a good egg. I have a feeling my kid would be in a lot more trouble if she hadn't been in his life over the last 6 months.

[seemunkee]

6. Good luck

I really hope you two can work this out.

[Beer Snob-50]

7. good luck

your requests are really not unreasonable.....:hug:

[Redbear]

8. Sounds like you are doing the right thing

but I am sure it will NOT be easy. Good luck and prayers sent your way.

[raccoon]

9. Good luck to you. Hope it works out. nt