So, tomorrow I have to go pee in a cup for the new job

[matcom]

can I bring back anything for you?

[anarch]

1. damn, that sounds like a pretty easy job

[Deep13]

9. I thought the exact same thing. nt

[taterguy]

2. A copy of Abbie Hoffman's book Steal this Urine Test

[KG]

3. think you'll pass?

drug testing; just another one of those freedoms the terrist hate us for.

[matcom]

6. been studying real hard

:D

[trof]

4. Be sure and wash your hands after.

Can you tell us about the job?
And congrats.

[matcom]

8. thanks

new job - full time, MUCH more than making before, place was bought last year by a company out of Texas so it is a smallish company with a HUGE corporate backing. They all seem VERY liberal (as indicated by the HUGE apology for requiring a drug test forced on new hires by corporate.

Nice salary
Bonus plan (generous too)
Full bennies
About 40 minute commute but that isn't hateful
Best of all: it is NOT in the dreadful mortgage industry

:hi:

[trof]

20. AWRIGHT!!!

Helen had put the Cajun Witchy-Woman VooDoo fix in.
It works.
:thumbsup:

p.s. I'll expect you to have the GOOD Scotch on hand.
;-)

[Mrs.Matcom]

30. Honey,

we only have 'good' scotch! :D

[BOSSHOG]

12. In the Marine Corps they teach us to wash our hands after we urinate

In the Navy they teach us not to piss on our hands.

[SKKY]

15. HAHAHAHA! You, my friend, RULE!!!!

:rofl: I hope you don't mind, but I'm taking that one onboard.

[BOSSHOG]

17. Run with it Shipmate!!

Add that comment with an hour of jocularity in what used to be called happy hour and sparks will fly.

[Parche]

22. Hey Boss

And in the AirForce they told us not to 'Piss' off the Navy or the Marines???? :rofl: :hi:

[BOSSHOG]

23. Excellent advice to the Flyboys My Friend

I'm still very proud of my last deployment where I was the only Swabbie in a shop with five Aviation "types." In four months I ran more then all the Air Force guys combined as part of our PRT program. I do love you guys though but I have never been able to figure out where ya keep your ships.

[JVS]

5. play a joke and poop in the cup

[billyskank]

7. Take as many drugs as you can beforehand

Make them go, what the fuck? Whose piss is this, Ozzy Osborne?!

[LaraMN]

10. Oh! Oh! I Want some of those cleansing towelettes!

Like eighty of them...

[In_The_Wind]

11. I'll pass.

[billyskank]

14. Hey you!

:hug:

[In_The_Wind]

16. Hey Darlin'!

Did ya have a good weekend? hmmm

[billyskank]

24. Yeah, it was pretty good

I went out saturday with my bro to the snooker club and played a whole load of pool. He kicked my ass, although to a large extent I kicked my own ass. I seem to have a preternatural ability to pocket the cue ball. :)

Hope you're doing well. :loveya:

[Manifestor_of_Light]

13. Leave your quarter on the counter when you finish,.

[johnnie]

18. Fuck with their heads

Drop an Oxycontin pill into it..lol

[supernova]

19. Make sure to thrill

the person who has to monitor you.

[underpants]

21. Take your asbestos gloves

THAT's HOT!

[Javaman]

25. is that a part of the job? professional cup pee'er? nt

[Elidor]

26. The tacos are on Matcom!

:bounce:

[Deja Q]

27. Some Mountain Dew and a bottle of lemon juice.

Don't you go and subversively do something nasty, m'kay?

:hide:

[rug]

28. If you shake it more than three times it's a sin.

[Wcross]

29. How many feet away will the cup be?

Unless I drink a LOT of water I ain't good for much more than ten feet, more if I stand on a chair. Just to screw with them put the cup on the floor and try to hit it!

[Throwing Stones]

31. What drugs, exactly, are they testing for?

I can understand screening meth addicts out of the flight control tower and just about any addict from the pharmacy, but irrespective of my ability to "pass", I don't think I could work for an entity that felt the need to know me so intimately.

I know most of us can't pick and chose for whom we'll work, but there are a host of worst-case scenarios with giving away that much privacy to a potential employer. For example, could the company's health coverage provider can use the whiz quiz results to pre-exempt themselves?

Best of luck.