if you have had experience with children biting, please post here.

[wildhorses]

any anecdotes are appreciated. links also. thanks

this is in regards to children BITING other children, very HARD. sorry for the confusion:blush:

[LaraMN]

1. JackMN recently chewed all the flaps off his

lift-the-flap alphabet book.
Then he cried, because all of the flaps were gone and he had to use his hand to cover the pictures.

:eyes:

That's really chewing, not biting though. Never mind.

[wildhorses]

8. thanks for sharing, though.

i love hearing about jack etal. ;)

jack, noel and a daughter, right? sorry the name escapes me at this moment :blush:

[laylah]

2. Well,

my (our) beloved Sara/Kaghime tried to use my "nibble" as her teething ring a couple of times. I just flicked her cheek with a finger. OMG...child abuse :scared: it worked tho'

SAAAARRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA, did my flicking give you bad tapes? :hug:

Hope this helps wildhorses. And, OH, btw, the flicks were gentle; however, I would agree to a 6 month old, they may have felt like slugs. You might need her feedback on this one.

edited to add: this thread IS about a biting nurser, yes? :blush:

[wildhorses]

7. no, this about one child BITING another child....

i will edit my original post, thanks for sharing however.

[Wapsie B]

3. My daughter used to bite all the time

during anger outbursts. But that was merely a symptom of a much larger problem.

[wildhorses]

10. thanks. no need to go further.

:hi:

[Wapsie B]

17. thanks as well.

once things were diagnosed and treated the biting stopped.

:hi:

[ohiosmith]

4. My mother had the cure. A glass of cold water in the face. None of us bit more than once.

I'm assuming you're talking about biting another person.

[Breeze54]

6. I spritzed them with cold water! lmao!

My youngest at around one, very sweetly and quietly, crawled to me while I was washing
dishes, pulled himself up using my pant leg and promptly and very hard, bit me on the ass!

:rofl:

I screamed! Ouch!! He cried! :rofl:

He kept trying to bite me, as they do, so after that I used a small spritzer
with cold water. It shocked him enough to get him to stop...finally! ;)

Pavlo's (sp?) dog? :shrug:

[wildhorses]

14. that is cute, thanks for sharing.

:rofl:

[wildhorses]

9. yes, thanks

one child biting another child.

[wildhorses]

13. oops, wrong place. n/t

[Maine-ah]

5. when BB bit my nip for the first time

I just pulled her off and stopped feeding her. She did it again, and again I stopped feeding her. She doesn't bite my nip anymore. But she'll still bite my shoulder or something once and a while. But she's just 9 months old, and still getting teeth.

[wildhorses]

11. thanks.

the child in this incident is almost two and is biting his older brothers. sorry, for the confusion.

[China_cat]

12. My youngest was a biter.

We had a hell of a time with it. He got kicked out of 3 different nursery schools and day care for it.

What finally worked was an accident. He came up behind me while I was making the bed and bit me on the butt...hard. Not expecting it, I jumped. He fell and hit against the corner of the bed. Gave him one hell of a shiner but he never bit anyone again after that.

Sorry that my experience won't give you any help because I truly know how frustrating a situation that can be.

[wildhorses]

15. thanks. pain for pain -- unintentional, however it was.

it worked...:shrug:

[janx]

16. That is NOT ALLOWED.

You have to be strict about it. That is not to say that you abuse a kid for doing it, but you have to make it known (taking the kid's face in your hands and strongly meaning what you say) that it is not allowed. Edited to add: It's the tone of your voice and your determination that will make a difference to a child. Children know when you mean what you say.

If the above doesn't work, then a time-out (which is actually shunning the child) should be administered on a very consistent basis. Consistency is important when it comes to any kind of discipline, but it is the hardest part, especially for working parents and single working parents.

[Breeze54]

18. A 'time-out' for a one yr. old?

I hear you about tone of voice though.

I said, "NO!" very sternly with meaning, while spritzing! :rofl:

[janx]

19. Absolutely.

Time out. Sit in crib. What ever. Kids are so smart, and they're smarter than we give them credit for--even at very young ages.

[Breeze54]

20. I probably put him in his playpen when he persisted but

I can't really remember now. He didn't do it for long.

He was just trying out his new teeth, imho. ;)

Distraction seemed to be my most useful tool though.

Their attention span is so short at that age....

I do remember when he went through the 'screaming fits' stage.

Gawd! It was brutal. Around 18 months old. Argh!

He'd cry scream for nothing. Just because.... and I checked for any issue's.

I did use a very short time out then.

It seemed to work because he wanted to be near me. ;)

PS. I always thought my kids were smart and I never used 'baby talk' with any of them.

All mine started talking at around 6 months so I knew they were 'on the ball"! ;)

[janx]

22. Yeah, they pay attention when they see that what you say actually

matches with the rules. My kids are (almost) grown now, and I have to say that that was the hardest part when they were babies. They're so beautiful, but you can't say one thing and mean another.

[Breeze54]

24. It's most hard when they can't tell you what's going on...

and I've learned that it never lasts unless you give it more attention then it deserves.

In other words, making an issue of it. They give up after awhile, usually. Either through

boredom or getting clocked by another kid! :P I preferred they didn't get clocked. ;)

[janx]

27. At the same time though, you have a wonderful relationship with

your child or children, and you can sense what's going on. You're right about their giving up after awhile.

[Breeze54]

30. Mine are all of legal age and over that now.

;)

It was a trip raising them but they turned out alright and they don't bite people anymore! :rofl:

[wildhorses]

21. the child to which i am referring is almost 2 with a full set of

teeth.

[Breeze54]

23. I saw that but it's typical of two yr. olds to bite!

It just comes with the territory! :P

They out grow it though.

Hang in there. Tell him/her NO! loudly and sternly!

Remove them from 'the action'.

Use a spritzer water bottle.

Don't laugh when they do it... ever!

Distract them!

It's a phase they go through, some more than others.

Give the baby lots of :hug: when they aren't biting!

[wildhorses]

26. i am not laughing. it is NOT funny. he is hurting his older brother.

this child get plenty of love, care and attention. the water bottle is a good idea. i will try it. thanks.

[janx]

29. Take that kid's head in your hands, eye-to-eye and tell him that biting is

not cool. Tell in him in VERY certain terms.

This is your progeny. It's important. Don't treat him like a cat by spraying water on him.If he doesn't behave, he has to get a time out in his room--but your behavior and expressions will be far more important than that.

Cradle his face in your hands, look into his eyes, and tell him, in no uncertain terms.

[wildhorses]

31. well, you have a point. i DO use a water bottle sprayer on my

cats...:rofl:

[Breeze54]

32. Hey? I was just listing suggestions!!

I'm not finger pointing at you! :hug:

Some parents do laugh at bad behavior and it makes the kid continue that behavior.

I'm not saying that you are doing that!! Ok?

Chill! I know you're a great Mom!!

It's not your fault that your child is doing this!

It's a stage a lot of kids go through. :hug:

[wildhorses]

34. sorry.

:blush:

:hug:

one of these days it will be funny. he really hurt his older brother, who immediately started crying REAL tears. i did take the child's face in my hands and told him not to bite anyone ever. i am hoping this is the end of it. we shall see. thanks.

[janx]

25. Yeah. You have to be strict--by no means abusive, but strict

and consistent.

[wildhorses]

28. i have been. i am not the only care giver. these children are

from divorced homes. i am thinking about giving the water bottle a try :shrug:

[Breeze54]

33. I only used the spritzer once or twice.

It startled him enough to stop the behavior and is better
then yelling or hitting, not that you would do that!! :hug:

Stern admonishment should work, after awhile. ;)

[wildhorses]

35. thanks.

let us hope that today was the last of it. :)

[mondo joe]

36. Mine didn't bite. But the "cure" I've heard of iis to let them play with another biter.

Apparently they work it out.

:shrug:

[Evoman]

37. My girlfriend used to bite other kids AND adults when she was a kid.

Her cousins were deathly afraid.

One time, she bit her mother really hard. Her mother then bit her back, VERY HARD. She cried, but she never did it again.

[MichiganVote]

38. Our oldest was a biter at about 18 months. Told him no, swatted his paddy...

finally one day he bit me on the back of the leg when I was cooking at the stove on a hot day---

Child didn't know what hit him when I bit him back, enough to sting, not enough to break skin.

No more biting problem.

Children should not be allowed to bite. Its very primitive.

[kath]

39. Advice from Dr. Barton Schmitt,

the god of pediatric advice for parents (IMHO) (I posted two great articles on toilet-training by him in the toilet-training thread here in the Lounge - if you've got a biter now, it won't be too long before you've got a kid ready for toilet-training :-) )

http://www.med.umich.edu/1libr/pa/pa_biting_hhg.htm

http://www.tnpc.com/article/showdesc.asp?n=372&n1=Toddler

[GoddessOfGuinness]

40. There was a kid in my first grade class...Tommy the Cannibal

He used to bite kids on the way home from school.
This was long before Conan the Barbarian. When that movie came out, the first thing I thought of was Tommy the Cannibal.

[Breeze54]

41. Article: 'Biting Between Ages Two and Three'

Biting Between Ages Two and Three

http://www.drspock.com/article/0,1510,4745,00.html

by Robert Needlman, M.D., F.A.A.P.
reviewed by Robert Needlman, M.D., F.A.A.P.

If biting is a problem between ages two and three, you have to decide if this is an isolated problem or not. Consider how often the biting occurs and how your child is getting along otherwise. If he is tense or unhappy much of the time and keeps biting other children for no good reason, it's a sign that something is wrong.

Perhaps he is being disciplined or restricted too much at home and is frantic and high-strung. Perhaps he has had too little chance to get used to other children and imagines them to be dangerous and threatening. Perhaps he is jealous of a baby at home and carries over the fear and resentment to all other small children, as if they were competitors, too. If biting is but one of many aggressive and worrisome behaviors, then it is only a symptom of a larger problem, and it is that larger problem, rather than the biting, that should draw your attention.

Usually, however, biting comes out of the blue like a thunderbolt in an otherwise model citizen. In this case, it is a normal developmental challenge and not a mark of some sort of psychological problem. Still, most parents of biters worry a lot, imagining that their sweet child may grow up to be a cruel adult. But biting is usually a temporary developmental challenge that even the gentlest of children go through.

Strategies to diminish the problem

First, you need to attempt to prevent the biting before it starts. Are there predictable times it occurs? If so, a little more adult supervision during those times is often useful. Is the child frustrated because he is the least competent member of his play group or because your limit-setting is inconsistent? You may need to consider changing his daily routine. Also be sure to give him lots of positive attention when he is behaving well. (For some children, biting another child is the only time they receive a lot of attention!)

If the child's frustration is obviously escalating, try redirecting his attention to another activity. If the child is old enough, you can discuss the problem at another time and ask him to help you think about how it hurts and what else he could do when he has the urge to bite.

If the biting has already occurred, you need to give him the firm message that it makes you unhappy and that you do not want him to do it again. Tell him not to do it again. Then sit with him for a few minutes while the message sinks in. Hold his hand or hug him firmly if he tries to go away. Avoid long lectures.

Some parents who have been bitten by an infant or a one-year-old ask if they should bite back. Parents should be able to control their child better by staying in charge as a friendly boss than by descending to the child's age level to battle with bites, slaps, or shouts. Besides, when you bite or slap a very young child, he's apt to keep it up, either as a fight or as a game or because he believes that if you are capable of such behavior, why shouldn't he be? The only thing you need to do is to keep from being bitten again by drawing back when he gets that gleam in his eye, showing him clearly that you don't like it and won't let it happen.

Look for biting to disappear by age three

At that time the child has learned to use words to express his desires or to vent his frustrations. He also has a better ability to restrain his impulses. I'd be concerned if children this age continue to bite. Consult with your doctor, nurse practitioner, counselor, friend, or other parents with similar concerns.

[Eurobabe]

42. I never bit my children.

[yellowdogintexas]

43. late to the thread, but my mom's answer: "Bite 'em back!". It works

See they don't know it hurts. This was the true advice from our pediatrician when my younger sister bit me..she was maybe 15 mo old and I was 5 almost 6. I went crying to my mom "she bit me" and my mom said "Bite her Back, she will stop". It worked. You don't have to bite hard, either. Of course you tell them NO and it is a bad thing and all that too. You have to be immediate though, almost as a reflex so the message connects right away.

Works for the nursing baby who clamps down a bit too hard. One bite back, and of course cessation of the food session immediately, solved that little problem; worked for mine, she never bit me again and she nursed to 27 months.

So my baby sister bit the middle one, of course and..guess what Mama said?


Then our niece at about age 2 or so, bit my baby sister who was then about 13, through a pair of jeans and left Tooth marks on my sister's butt...guess what GRAN said?


Then Gran had to apply this herself to baby sister's daughter when that kid was around 2 1/2 and she bit her baby brother who was maybe 8 weeks old. Takes a certain kind of Grandma to bite her 2 year old grandaughter, doesn't it? But it worked, and shocked the daylights out of the kid. who adored my mother beyond belief.

The moral is: all kids bite at a certain age. Biting them back shows them it HURTS, and they figure it out pretty quickly. By the way, all these bite happy little girl babies grew up to be wonderful young women, well adjusted and happy beautiful ladies. The niece who bit through the pair of jeans is now a mom with a pretty little 6 week old daughter. The niece who bit her brother is graduating from college in December. My daughter is an artist. My sisters raised those lovely nieces and are my best friends.

Mom never taught us to hit each other back, or return any other aggression EXCEPT biting, by the way. That was a sure fire recipe for deep trouble.

[LeftyMom]

44. Never had a problem with mine biting other kids. He would bite me.

It was a frustration issue compounded by his expressive language difficulty, so working on other ways to express his frustrations took care of the problem. He had a really large vocabulary but when he was very emotional one way or another he had a hard time using words.

[mcar]

45. My younger son used to bite his brother

Occasionally other kids or DH or me, but mostly his brother, who is 10 years older and, by the way, he adores.

YS was an ornery toddler, subject to temper tantrums and the like. DH and I were older when we had him and got through the tantrums by basically ignoring them. Fortunately he only acted out like that at home, in public and at preschool he was O8)

The biting was difficult to solve because it seemed to be more related to activity than to anger. He'd bite it the boys were running around or playing together. I think it was somewhat impulse at first, then a way to get his brother's attention (it certainly accomplished that), especially when his brother had friends over or we were interacting with him and not YS.

He was 2 and 3 so we used timeouts and stern voices but it took a while. It was very frustrating and I would get SO angry at him. He finally either grew out of it or got the message.

Good luck and stick with it. You're definitely not alone; there are lots of toddler biters around.

[Dora]

46. When ours was under two years old, we used firm voices, stern faces.

After he turned two, we stopped the play we were involved in when the biting occured, and if he persisted with the biting, we put him in time-out for two minutes.

The biting was always a playful call for attention, but it did stop. He's two and a half now, and he doesn't bite.

[Lydia Leftcoast]

47. This advice is considered terribly incorrect now, but the older of my

two brothers was a biter, and I (age about 5 at the time) was his favorite target.

My mom tried the firm "no" approach several times, and it didn't work. One day he bit me so hard that he drew blood through my sleeve.

At that, my mom told me to bite him back. I didn't want to, but I did, just enough to leave teeth marks, not enough to break the skin.

He looked absolutely startled and then started crying.

However, he never bit anyone again.

I think the poster above who said that they don't realize that biting hurts was right on.

I've heard stories like this from other people, and whatever the professional advice above says, I've never heard of the "bite 'em back" approach leading to a biting contest.