Vampire-like Dick Cheney stole the blood and heart of my dog last night!

[HamdenRice]

No, I'm not having a psychotic break. It was a dream. One of those dreams that is so weird that you wake up and say to yourself, what the fuck was that about!

So here it is: I was in my kitchen and someone came in (not sure who) and said something like, I think you should see this. We go into my living room, and there is Dick Cheney slumped over my couch. (Actually he was half kneeling. If you've ever seen the movie, Remains of the Day, where Mr. Steven's father has a stroke in the hallway, that's the position Cheney assumed in my living room.) Dick Cheney had had another heart attack, but this time in my living room. I tried to ask him how he was but he was barely conscious and gave monosyllabic non-answers.

So I ask the other people in the room, shouldn't we call the hospital and get Cheney some help, and everyone was like, "nah, let 'em die."

But then something weird happened. It became "apparent" that Cheney had somehow taken over my dog's heart to help his diseased heart. Teddie's heart was pumping blood through Cheney's body! If Cheney died, my dog, Teddie, also would die!

So I called 911. Instead of an ambulance coming, however, a Korean War type helicopter (one much smaller, however, than the ones on MASH) arrived and landed in my driveway (which actually would be impossible, of course). The helicopter was not from a local New York hospital, but from southern New Jersey. It was the only hospital apparently with an available helicopter.

I went out to talk to the EMS guy in the helicopter. He had a small Korean War type stretcher, rather than the modern gurneys used by ambulances. We went in and put the rather large Cheney on the stretcher and carried him out to the helicopter, where we had to strap him under the helicopter, like they did during the Korean War.

At this point, however, Dick Cheney had transformed into my dog. So I carefully strap my dog, Teddie, into the stretcher and tell him, "Now stay Teddie, don't jump off the stretcher till you get to the hospital."

Some time passed, and I drove to south Jersey to see how Teddie and Vice President Cheney were doing. As soon as I arrived I could see the dog was fine. He was on the yacht of a very rich family that was fostering him during his recovery, playing with their two dogs and two children and swimming in the marina. They greeted me and gave me back my dog.

I was informed that Teddie's and Dick Cheney's hearts had been successfully separated, but now that Cheney's heart was not being assisted by Teddie's heart we had to decide what to do to help Mr. Cheney.

"You can let him die now," I said.

Have you had any particularly bizarre, disturbing or unforgettable dreams lately?

btw, here's Teddie:

[La Lioness Priyanka]

1. oh no!!!

your dog is ADORABLE1

[HamdenRice]

2. Thanks! Now that their hearts are disconnected ...

he has that goofy smile back!

How's it going?

[HamdenRice]

3. Aaarrra need blood....

Actually a kick for the evening crowd to see of they have dreams they want to share.