when was the 'moment' that you KNEW that you had to dump the asshole before you went crazy

[LynneSin]

November 14th 1998. We were with my family at Dairy Queen and it dawned on me this was the last time he would spend any time with me or my family every again.

Never looked back

[Pierre.Suave]

1. this thread is sexist

you are leaving out us straight guys... :mad: :crazy:

[LynneSin]

3. women can be assholes

step right up and share your story!

[Pierre.Suave]

16. No

men do not call women "assholes"

[QueenOfCalifornia]

18. really?

that's news to me...

[redqueen]

19. On what planet?

?

[La Lioness Priyanka]

24. bullshit

[Pierre.Suave]

42. men use a different word

And it isnt "asshole"

[La Lioness Priyanka]

59. actually i have heart both hetero and homosexual men say assholes about their partners

and lesbians use it too

[Pierre.Suave]

60. weird

in my entire life, I have never heard that.

[Withywindle]

83. Yup, me too.

It's the universal rude-body-part insult. After all, they're like opinions, everybody has one. And anybody can be one. :) (Just about everybody is at some point in their lives)

[Pacifist Patriot]

104. Tell that to the guy who called me an asshole just last week.

There is no way anyone could confuse me with an XY.

[Starbucks Anarchist]

148. Who the hell called you that?

I only met you briefly, but I don't see how anyone could consider you that. :hi:

[Mutley]

143. I've been called an asshole by men before.

I've been called some of those other things you're thinking, too.

[AllegroRondo]

2. when the police showed up with an arrest warrant

yup, thats her! take her away!

[IndianaJones]

4. not a spaghetti breaker huh? I understand. nt.

[LeftyMom]

5. He spit on me.

I changed the locks.

The end.

[Magrittes Pipe]

41. flvegan spit on you?

:o

[LeftyMom]

47. No.

:eyes:

my ex did. Which is why he's my ex.

flvegan is very sweet.

[MrCoffee]

6. right after she stabbed me in the shoulder with a steak knife.

[TheFriendlyAnarchist]

82. Good plan.

:thumbsup:

[KitchenWitch]

7. When he pulled a gun on me.

[Roon]

43. My Mother had a gun pulled on her by her ex-husband

my ex-step father. He fired the gun in the house trying to shoot me!! I was 13 at the time. It made headlines on TV and the papers, but our names was never revealed to protect me. He only served five days in jail, five years of intensive probation for the whole episode. I used to hate him, but now I just feel bad for him. He was wounded twice in Vietnam and I can understand how that would make anyone nuts.

[ThomCat]

115. I hope someone stapled him to a wall

and left him there for a year or so. x(

[KitchenWitch]

116. He got his....

Believe me.

[texas1928]

8. When her sister chased me around the roof of a B and B with an axe.

[IndianaJones]

12. there she goes. nt.

[mainegreen]

20. Man, you just saw that on tv.

It wasn't real!

[texas1928]

27. Nope, but it is one of my favorite movies.

To many great lines in it.

"A Piper is down, we have a piper down."

[Whisp]

55. excuse me, I ordered a L.a.r.g.e. capuccino.

hhehe. one of my fave movies too.

[QueenOfCalifornia]

21. I thought that was normal

behavior for Texas gals....

I think you are just a big baby.

[texas1928]

29. Nope

Usually the girl just hog ties you and does naughty things to you. :D

[KitchenWitch]

32. Admit it, you like that!

:D

[texas1928]

37. Well of course...

Girls doing naughty things. What is not to love?

[Archae]

9. Last year.

She called the cops on me, and since I was with my family at the time, my alibi was airtight.

She OD'ed on pills later on, facing drug charges.

[rug]

10. When she withheld sex to control me.

[IndianaJones]

11. lol. nt.

[NewJeffCT]

94. the very height of abuse

:hide:

[Arugula Latte]

13. at a Shakespeare Festival

He started one too many little freak-out-over-nothing scenes. I realized, "I'm done." Instead of getting upset, I just started laughing at him because I realized what an annoying little Drama King he was. I'd been waiting to break up with him until after I'd seen all the plays we had tickets for, but I just had to get out right then and there.

[Name removed]

14. Deleted sub-thread

Sub-thread removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[regularguy]

15. When she turned me into a newt!

I've gotten better.

[skygazer]

17. When he tasered me

at a John Kerry appearance. Talk about embarassing! :blush:

[kay1864]

38. ...

:spray:

:thumbsup:

[HEyHEY]

62. Hey, he just wanted to see your circuit city receipt!

[Critters2]

22. He had told me that we had insurance through the university

and I could let my health insurance lapse to save money. Just before I was to have major surgery, I learned that, not only did he not have health insurance, but he was so far behind on tuition payments he was allowed to enroll at the university. I had my mom call a lawyer while I was in surgery.

[BlueIris]

52. Holy. Shit.

Sounds like something my ex would have done.

[Critters2]

87. And it didn't even make sense for him to do it

I had insurance. I was working for a start-up non-profit, so had to pay my own premiums, but I was ordained, so could get good rates through the denomination. There was no advantage to telling me to stop my insurance, especially since he didn't have any to replace it with. That's when I realized that he was not only sneaky and dishonest....he was crazy!!

Interestingly, I have a friend/colleague whose ex did the same thing--convinced her he was in school when he wasn't. What's the point of that?!!

[redqueen]

23. It was last winter.

Earlier this year. It was a small thing, really... but it was definitely the metaphorical straw. He wouldn't stop trying to start an argument with me, which wasn't rare by any means, but it finally dawned on me that he would never, ever stop.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

25. when he called someone a 'nigger'. that was the only asshole i have dated

i was 18.

[mainegreen]

26. When I realised it wasn't attached to a person.

It was just a little sphincter, raiding the fridge, sitting on the couch smoking and blowing little smoke rings all day, never cleaning up, asking to borrow the car.
Quit a shock I tell you. I could have sworn there was person attached to it, but I think it revolted, killed it's master and buried the body out back.

[QueenOfCalifornia]

30. wow...

that is a good reason to get out...

Were the animals okay?

[mainegreen]

35. I think there was a cat, but I'm not sure.

It may have eaten the cat.

[QueenOfCalifornia]

144. Not the cat..

They usually can kill a sphincter... they run em down and toy with them until they just give up.

[swag]

28. When an LSD trip revealed to me that I was not with the right person at all.

[Shakespeare]

31. When, totally unprovoked, he called me....

...a "fucking cunt." My husband, mind you. There were other things going on (other verbal abuse, alcoholism, wouldn't work), but that was quite literally the last straw.

[Left Is Write]

90. !!

Clearly, we were with the same man.

[Shakespeare]

93. ROFL...oh, I hope not.

I wouldn't wish him on my worst enemy. :rofl:

[Left Is Write]

95. Yes, I feel the same way about him.

He's married to his female equivalent now, so good luck to them both.

My daughter (now 20) lived with her dad and stepmonster for a few months last year, but is now, thankfully, under her own roof instead of theirs.

[EstimatedProphet]

33. When she told her parents I beat her to get money

right after she hocked the wedding rings for drug money.

[ThomCat]

64. Wow.

:(

That's definitely a sign that it's time to leave. Two signs, actually.

[EstimatedProphet]

84. And I've been much happier ever since

[Raffi Ella]

34. I've only had that happen once.

We were with my family at the time too just like your story.

I was 22 and we were spending the night at my familys for Christmas.Christmas morning I got up,got in the shower and when I came out he was in my room with a glass of OJ acting really content and cozy in his surroundings.

I knew right then that it was over between us.

[Danger Mouse]

124. I feel like I'm missing something here.

:shrug:

[Raffi Ella]

162. lol.

well obviously we weren't compatible or else I would've had a different reaction to that scenario.

Suffice it to say he was the definition of a narcissist and was satisfied with himself in that moment,it had nothing to do with me/us.It was crystal clear in that split second what an asshole he was.I fell out of love right then and there and could hardly stand to look at him that morning.

[TrogL]

36. He started drooling

He'd sit, comotose, on the couch, head between his legs, a big pool of drool forming on the carpet.

[LynneSin]

39. Is this your pet dog

:shrug:

[TrogL]

81. No, my partner

He was bombed on morphine, pot, nerve blockers, codeine and who knows what else all prescribed for a back condition he didn't have. One doctor had already "fired" him as a patient for prescription abuse.

When I finally roused him, he came at me with a knife, I walloped him with a canvas backpack, HE called the cops on me but they took him away.

[Sock Puppet]

40. When I realized they had more fingers than teeth.

[Deep13]

44. The moment the Supreme Court gave him the presidency. nt

[Mad_Dem_X]

154. Best. Answer. Ever. n/t

[Taverner]

45. She pulled a gun on me

[davsand]

46. When he criticized me for "over-tipping" the waitress.

I was picking up the bill and I put down a tip for the server. He picked the tip up and started trying to tell me I over tipped and it was a waste of money to do that.


I never went out in public with him again. I loathe cheap assholes.



Laura

[QueenOfCalifornia]

146. I dated him

I swear I did....

Every time we would go out I would wait till me cheap ass wasn't looking and add money to the tip -- It was embarrassing and creepy to not give the server a normal tip -- one day/night he caught me and he left me at the restaurant --- p.s. he has lots and lots of money.

[davsand]

163. This guy had worked in service industry. He should have known better.

I always tip at least 20%, and if there is a problem I speak to the manager at the time. If it was his money that he was moaning about, I'd have just dropped some of my own on the table and walked away. IT was MY money he was throwing a fit about and THAT pissed me off. I remember thinking that if we had issues over the amount of MY money to leave as a tip in a restaurant, there was NO way we would ever be able to deal with stuff like bills and family expenses. (Imagine the fights over buying school clothes for kids or paying for orthodontia!)

Under-tipping bugs the crap outta me, and it is even more offensive coming from anyone that has EVER waited tables or worked in service industry.



Laura

[raccoon]

48. When I finally realized I was tired of being treated like a yo-yo by this asshole.

Come here--go away.

I wrote him a Dear John letter. Only one I ever wrote.

[MissHoneychurch]

49. It was building up over months

I took me a while to recognize that I was losing myself in that relationship. He abused me verbally and lowered my self esteem. The last straw was when he said "Oh your more the freaky kind" regarding *ahem* the word not to be mentioned here *ahem* , which wasn't freaky or freaking at all ... next day I broke up.
Of course I didn't cry over him (never did) but he found that strange and said "Well, you didn't even cry at your father's funeral" (when he saw me crying my ass off at the grave). He was an asshole through and through.

The whole relationship was a big mistake and I sticked with him way too long. I even broke up with before and took him back. When I moved we were thinking of him moving to Frankfurt with me and move in with me. I broke it off just in time. I was a gold donkey for him and would have been for the years to come if I hadn't stopped it. :banghead:

I was stupid. Plain and simple.

[IndianaJones]

51. what the heck is "the freaky kind"? nt.

[MissHoneychurch]

56. I have no idea

someone who does more than three positions in the dark in the bedroom

[IndianaJones]

57. good riddance. nt.

[MissHoneychurch]

58. Took me long enough n/t

[IndianaJones]

63. Do you live in Germany? nt.

[MissHoneychurch]

65. Yes

I am German. He was American

[IndianaJones]

66. Is Holiday Park still around? I loved that place when I was a kid. nt.

[MissHoneychurch]

67. Where is that supposed to be?

near Frankfurt?

[IndianaJones]

68. Hassloch(?) I think. nt.

[MissHoneychurch]

69. Yep, it is still there

http://holidaypark.de/index.php?id=10&L=1

[IndianaJones]

70. I lived in Mannheim as a kid in the late 70's. That place brings back some memories. nt.

[MissHoneychurch]

72. Good for you

to have good memories of Germany. Ever came back again?

[IndianaJones]

73. No, but I want to. You just can't appreciate Europe when you're in elementary school...

I vaguely remember field trips to castles and stuff. Vast majority of my time there was spent on the base. I think my mom looted half the country though.

[MissHoneychurch]

74. Come on over again

there is a lot to see here. Esp. around Mannheim/Heidelberg.

[IndianaJones]

76. I think that may be my next vacation. nt.

[MissHoneychurch]

77. Cool

you won't regret it. And if you tell the people you are against *, you will be welcomed open armed and not asked stupid questions ... LOL

Let me know, maybe we can meet.

[IndianaJones]

78. Thanks. I may have some questions for you as I research. nt.

[MissHoneychurch]

80. Sure

pm me when you need help

[Amaya]

50. When I was 18

My bf told me he was fantasizing about me having sex with him and his friend - one night, he kept asking and asking and asking to do it.
I wasn't down with that... so I dumped his sorry ass.
The end.

[Phillycat]

53. When I realized it hurt more to be with him than to be without him.

And now I'm happily married and he's left with his d__k in his hands! :D

[distantearlywarning]

54. When the police came

And I suddenly realized that I had become "that person" on Cops and so had he. Not that there were any video cameras or anything, but nevertheless it was the same kind of situation.

[idgiehkt]

102. I had a similar experience

lying to the cop about her info so he wouldn't be able to track her down (she'd already left by the time he got there). When not on chemicals she is a great person. I really still love her, truth be told. She called a couple of days ago. But I've worked too hard on myself and my life to allow it to be destroyed by someone else's addiction...and she is not willing to do the work to keep from falling back into the white powder when the going gets tough. I have done that work, and I don't want to deal with anyone who isn't willing to trudge the path, and then expects me to deal with their insanity because they aren't.

[HEyHEY]

61. When she said "I want to be together, I just don't know if we can be together"

That was way too confusing for living.
I dumped her... but, being incapable of letting go we began the five month breakup from hell that you read about here.

[rhiannon55]

71. When he was taken out of our house in handcuffs

By morning, I (with two black eyes, and two very scared little girls) was on a bus out of state. Didn't see him again for 20 years. By then, he was a broken-down old man. Karma's a bitch.

[ThomCat]

110. I'm very, very glad that you were able to get him taken away,

that you got away, and that there was some justice.

I hope you and both of those little girls have been much better off ever since. :)

[rhiannon55]

142. Thank you for your kind words, ThomCat

Actually, I was pregnant when I left (my other daughters were not from that relationship), and we have all been immensely better off. :-)

[MissMillie]

75. which time?

I've been w/ so many people that weren't worth my effort that I'm sure I've lost track of some of them.

[Karenina]

79. When he tried to force me into

a dependent living situation with him by sub-letting MY FLAT to an ex and her hubby. Helping "friends" get established. I dunno about anyone else but I don't consider anyone who leaves shit in my toilet bowl and rotting garbage in my fridge a "friend" after I offered my space to her for a few days.

It snapped when it seems he contracted scarlet fever from somewhere...

Transmission is never 100%. O8)

[KG]

85. when I felt compelled to install a keystroke counter on my 'puter so I could track her little games

a keystroke counter is a very good tool, if you're suspecious and share a computer.

[Left Is Write]

86. January 11, 1988.

Calling me the "c" word in the middle of the night while screaming drunk was pretty much the last of many straws.

[Shakespeare]

89. See post #35.

:hug: :hi:

[Left Is Write]

92. Wow.

:hug:

[hisownpetard]

88. When (after 34 yrs. of marriage) he went to Florida on my birthday, with the woman

he was having an affair with, and they stayed - both of them! - with my mother-in-law,
in her condominium for 5 days.

I had him served with papers when they returned.

[Left Is Write]

96. Ouch.

Talk about adding insult to injury. :hug:

[hisownpetard]

98. Yup.

[Dr. Strange]

91. When she started tasering everyone in the Lounge.

You're out of control! It's time for an intervention!

[NewJeffCT]

97. Was she breastfeeding while doing it?

sorry, couldn't resist.

[Dr. Strange]

122. Nah,

her miniskirt was so short, she couldn't keep track of her receipts.

[NewJeffCT]

99. Unfortunately, I should have known to dump my ex

But, I always convinced myself that maybe if I stayed with her just a little big longer, worked a little bit harder at it, sacrificed a little bit more, etc, things would start to get better and it would all work out.

The weird thing was, I had this feeling that it wouldn't work out before the wedding, but still went ahead with the wedding. And, it wasn't the "pre-wedding jitters" sort of thing, as I'm not the type to get nervous about that. I was there the night before the wedding, standing all by myself knowing it would never work, but too scared to put a stop to it.

And, right after the honeymoon, it all started going downhill...

[tigereye]

100. never really dated an asshole

a few brooding punk rockers/new wavers though. They always bailed for women who looked like the singer for the Distillers.

[RetroLounge]

141. She's cute

RL

[tigereye]

160. no question -

actually they weren't as kick-ass as she is, to be fair.

[zanne]

101. July 6, 1976.

I woke up beside my husband, looked at him and realized I simply didn't love him anymore. It was very sad. He later found a wonderful woman and married her. He's very happy now and I'm so glad, though I still have feelings of guilt for what I put him through by falling out of love with him. The heart wants what it wants, and sometimes that sucks.

[BarenakedLady]

130. Amen.

:(

It does suck.

[achtung_circus]

103. She left for a week to perform a locum, out of town

and I realized I felt nothing but relief.

[Pacifist Patriot]

105. When the guy suggested I could use a few five mile sprints to get in shape.

Almost 5'10" and a size 8. Dawned on me that he was always finding some way in which I wasn't quite measuring up to other women around me. Told him to go find Twiggy and maybe she'd put up with his bullshit. Can't believe I stayed with him as long as I did. I was never funny enough, skinny enough, etc. His friends called him "lunkhead." That should have been a clue. Duh!

[wildhorses]

106. for the first one ...on or about 12-12-90

pretty good story behind it all but, NOT for open forum.

for the second one on 9-11-01. i learned who my real family was on that day.

[bluedigger]

107. I guess I am the asshole.

I've always been the dumpee. Started with mom when I was three. I'm not perfect by any means, but most people think I'm a nice guy, once they get to know me. Don't take this the wrong way - I saw the Bill Maher threads last week - but for me women are like dogs, and I'm the car - they love to chase me and don't have a clue what to do with me when they catch me. Never touched a woman in anger, never stole from one, never called called one a c**t (well, I did tell the ex to stop acting like a bitch once, but hey, it was a simile, and she was really trying my patience - she didn't appreciate the nuance:rofl: ). I guess I was just born to be single. Haven't had a SO in almost a decade now. (And that line about finding love when you stop looking - BS! It finds you - or not.)

[raccoon]

158. I agree, I think that line is BS,

"And that line about finding love when you stop looking - BS! It finds you - or not."

I think it MAY be true for some people, who were looking so hard they came across as desperate. Then when they chilled somewhat, and didn't come across as desperate, it was easier for them to find someone.

But in general, I don't think it's true.

[lost-in-nj]

108. When the private eye

sent me the pictures!!!!

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

lost

[ThomCat]

109. I'm glad you can laugh about it.

It sounds horrible, just needed to use a PI, and then getting proof... :(

[lost-in-nj]

112. Yeah

I can "laugh" about it...
it hurts, we were married 30 years....
he has been gone almost a year.
and you know what???
I have found me.....
and I like her...
it might be the best thing that happened to me...
:hug:

lost

[ThomCat]

113. I'm very glad.

You are a very cool person. You're definitely worth finding. :hug:

[Bennyboy]

111. When I got sued for 2 million dollars because of Her kid's actions

and she blamed me. After I had been shot at. After her kid stole from me every single night. After her kid a(different one) accused me of child molestation. After her kid stole from me so often I had to move my things every night. After she told me "if you want him to stop stealing, move your stuff". After he tackled her, beat her and she said "it's allright honey you don't have to go to high school". After he had to come to Hawaii with us after being suspended from jr high because she could not trust him and he stole from me before my suitcase made it in the room. As soon as he stole my car at 12 years old. As soon as he wrecked 6 cars between 16 and 18.

But as you can see, I am a slow learner.

[ThomCat]

114. Wow. You must have truly loved her to

put up with all of that. :(

The truly sad part is not just everything it cost you, and everything you lost, but what kind of adults have those kids become. WHo else is now paying for the way she raised them?

[Bennyboy]

119. yeah I did......

And still do really. The end came when the DA told me that her kid lied on the witness stand about the reason I was being sued. She could not understand how I could be so upset.

[jobycom]

117. When she kept screaming at my daughter for no reason, and I knew

she would treat her the same way she had treated me for 19 years.

[Nevernose]

118. When I thought, "I'd rather be lonely for the rest of my life..."

"...than to spend one more minute with this woman."

I think it was a Tuesday morning, or maybe a Wednesday.

Never been happier, and loneliness doesn't phase me, either.

[Danger Mouse]

120. when she told her (then) ex-bf that i had raped her in order to make him feel sorry for her...

slashed her wrists in front of me, attempted suicide because i didn't want anything to do with her anymore, and told me her ex-bf was beating her to make me feel sorry for her.
and i still got back together with her.
one of the stupidest things i ever did.

[fizzgig]

125. ...

:hug:

[Danger Mouse]

126. when i think of how she used to treat me...

well, i'm so glad i have you, is all... :hug:

[ThomCat]

127. I'm glad you're finally away from all of that.

I hope you are very, very far away from all of that.

[Danger Mouse]

134. she, fortunately, has done a lot of growing up since then.

...and can't believe she used to be like that.
i am. i've made peace with it. but it was hell for awhile. she was the ultimate in manipulative, vindictive, and controlling.

[TOhioLiberal]

121. About 5 minutes before...

...he dumped me. Or something like that.

[Ellen Forradalom]

123. When I came onto him

and he laughed dorkily and said, "Uh, seen the mailman? Seen the water softener guy?"

I can take a hint.

[XemaSab]

150. What a fucker.

:pals:

[Ellen Forradalom]

159. Oh, things are better

We are getting along fine now.

But, yes, what a dork.

[fizzgig]

128. i lived with the asshole for seven months after the breakup

i dumped him cuz he screwed around

i finally got rid of him after he started picking the lock on my bedroom door after a fight to keep screaming at me (the fights usually started because i wouldn't sleep with him), started dropping the c-bomb and threw a can of beer at my head

[Danger Mouse]

135. my turn to do this...

:hug:

[fizzgig]

140. ...

:hug:

[BarenakedLady]

129. When he hit me.

That about did it. I was young, but smart enough to end it there.

That was only the beginning of a string of assholes, unfortunately. :(

[GOPisEvil]

132. ...

:hug:

[BarenakedLady]

152. It was long ago

but thanks for the hug. :)

:hug:

[Danger Mouse]

136. you are a lovely person...

:hug:

[BarenakedLady]

153. No you are!

:hug:

[ThomCat]

137. There is no shortage of assholes in the world.

It's hard to avoid them. :(

[BarenakedLady]

155. Yup, I keep bumping into them

:hug:

[Inchworm]

138. Gonna need a name

We'll form a possee.

:hug:

[BarenakedLady]

156. Meh

Not worth the effort. But thanks for the thought!

:hug:

[TK421]

131. Hopefully, it wasn't over one of their awesome barbecue sandwiches

because that would kind of ruin my impression of Dairy Queen and also rape a bit of my childhood memories...just a tad, now. But don't get me wrong, because this post would also come to mind whenever I bite into that barbecue-y goodness ( for about two bucks ).:D

[likesmountains 52]

133. When he was more interested in the NBA finals than conversing with his son...

[Inchworm]

139. About 2 months before I married her

thinking it was the right thing to do.

I have yet to regain my sanity, but I'm slowly getting there.

:hi:

[w8liftinglady]

145. he went 5 weeks without speaking to me.not my thing

[grace0418]

147. Geezus H! Maybe having no dates in high school was a good thing. I met

my husband in college. He drives me crazy sometimes but he's never pulled the shit described here.

:hug: to all of you here.

[DarkTirade]

149. When I realized it wasn't just her stress over her sick grandma that was causing her to act that way

and the only reason I'd put up with her bullplop up until then was because I knew she was under stress.

I can't even really describe the kind of shit I'd been putting up with... it was mostly little things, but it all added up. I just reached a point where I refused to put up with it anymore.

[annonymous]

151. When he beat me up

I refused to go along with his bondage fantasy. This asshole stalked me for almost a year after I broke up with him. He nearly got me fired from my job because he was showing up at my workplace to harrass me. I ended up moving to get away from him and severing ties with old friends because I was afraid they would tell him where I was. This happened well before anti-stalking laws. I was 19 at the time and knew if I let him get away with beating me up then his behavior would only escalate. This was the hardest thing I have ever done but the results were worth it.

[ThomCat]

157. You were a very brave person

and I applaud you for the strength you showed. :applause:

I have friends who have done exactly the same thing, and for the same reason. I've seen how hard it was for them. I hope your life is much, much better now.

[crim son]

161. March 2006 - was it the 2nd?

Marriage over. I have never experienced anything as horrifying as that realization on that day.

[Lydia Leftcoast]

164. When I was invited to a party only AFTER the host had ascertained that

my boyfriend was out of town that weekend.

I knew that his bad manners and self-centeredness were starting to annoy ME, but I thought I was perhaps being too fussy. Then I realized that other people thought he was rude and self-centered, too, so I began preparing to have "the talk" with him.