Pirate Joke thread: What's a pirate's favorite kind of cookie? Update.

[texas1928]

Any one know?

























UPdate:
Ships Ahoy

[Dr. Strange]

1. I don't know

I don't have my internet browser set to accept cookies.

[texas1928]

3. Ships Ahoy.

[ohiosmith]

4. A pirate walks into a bar with a big ship's wheel down his pants.

The bartender says, "Excuse me, sir, but do you know you have a ship's wheel down the front of your pants?"
And the pirate says...

Aaargh, it's driving me nuts!!

[texas1928]

9. HA HA HA

:rofl:

[Dr. Strange]

12. Ahoy, ye scurvy dog!

:toast: :headbang:
:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

I see the taser marks are healing fine!

[ohiosmith]

2. Ships Ahoy?

[texas1928]

5. Right....

a little kid with a speech impediment dresses up as a pirate and goes trick or treating. he knocks on the door of a house and a man answers. "oh, i can see you're dressed up as a pirate." the man says. "but where are your buccaneers?" the kid gets really mad, and says "on the sides of my buckin' head!"

[madinmaryland]

6. Good one!!

:spray:

[texas1928]

10. Have you heard about the new pirate movie?

It's rated AARRRRGGH!

[Pierre.Suave]

21. HAHAHAH

I have not laughed that hard in a LONG time.

[Parche]

7. A Pirate Walks Into The Bar Wearing His Rolex....

He says to the bartender................



:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :hi:

[texas1928]

8. how much did the pirate pay to get his ears pierced?

a buccaneer

[SteppingRazor]

11. You heard about the pirate who sold his ship and started farming?

He sold his corn for a buck an ear.

:hide:

[texas1928]

14. What's a pirate's favorite mode of transportation?

A cAARRRRGGH!

[SteppingRazor]

16. Oh, god. Not the Arrrrr jokes. There's a million of'em.

What's a pirate do for fun?
Go to the Carrrrrrrnival.

Why do pirates not buy houses?
They don't like Yaaarrrrrrrrrdwork.

What's a pirates least favorite shipboard duty?
Scraping baaarrrrrrnicles

And so on, and so on ... :)

[ohiosmith]

13. Where do pirates go to work out?

To the JIM LAD!!!!

[texas1928]

15. what's a pirate's favorite kind of socks?

arrrrgyle

[Parche]

18. Pirate This

Why do pirates always bury their treasure 18 inches below the ground?
Because booty is only shin deep!

A pirate was on Wheel of Fortune, and it was his turn.
The pirate said...We'll try for an ARRRRHH!!


Did you hear about the pirate with two wooden legs?
They caught fire and burned his ARRrrrse to the ground!

What is the name of the pirate tax office?
The Aye. Arrr. S!

What's a pirates favorite margarine?
Parrrrkay!

What do pirates smoke to get high?
Sea-Weed!!!!!!

A guy walks into a pub with a t-shirt that says "Pirates are stupid for 3 reasons!" He walks up to the bar, orders an ale. and sits down. He no more than gets his quaff when a smelly old sot comes up to him and says, "Aaargh, thar, matey! What's that yer shirt be sayin' thar?"

The guy looks around, looks the man straight in the eyes (well, in his one good eye, anyway), and says "Reason number 1 -- Pirates can't read!" Then he turns around to enjoy his beverage.

Not used to this sort of disrespect, the surly gent takes his hooked arm, lays it aggressively on the man's shoulder, and slowly says, "What's that ye be sayin' thar, sonny-boy?"

The guy looks around again, looks his aggressor square in the eye this time, and enunciates, "Rea-son num-ber 2 -- Pirates can't hear!" And again, he turns around to face the bar.

Well, by this time, the old codger has had enough. He backs up, pulls his sword, and growls, "Aaaaargh, ye bilge rat, that be enuff of yer sass! Stand up and fight, ye lubber, yer soon to be acquainted with Davy Jones, his-self!"

With that, the guy stands up, pulls his pistol, and shoots the pirate dead through his one good eye. He drops his head as he watches him fall, sighs, and says, "Reason #3 -- You pirates are constantly bringing swords to gunfights!"

When is a pirate like a bird?
When he's a-robbin'!

What did all the pirates say to the last pirate to come to the party?
Ahoy Latey!!!!

:rofl: :hi:

[edbermac]

17. What did the first mate see when he went into the head?

The captain's log.

:rofl:

[texas1928]

19. what does a pirate say when he takes over santa's job?

ho ho ho and a bottle of rum

[Q3JR4]

20. Lol, that's so bad....

:spank: