Whats the best way to ask someone if they are a vampire?

[Orrex]

My new roommate doesn't have any mirrors, and he keeps throwing out all of my garlic. Also, I never see him during the day.

I don't want to make him uncomfortable, but I'd have for him to feel as though he has to hide anything from me.

[Tian Zhuangzhuang]

1. Ask him to suck your........ neck

[Orrex]

3. That's hardly conclusive

I'm positively delicious, after all.

[Shakespeare]

2. I'd take the passive route and just....

....offer him something with a LOT of garlic in it.

[sanguinivorous]

4. If he's anything like the self-proclaimed vampires I've seen...

...in various documentaries that touched on the subject, you wouldn't have to ask. Instead, you'd most likely be posting the "How do I ask a vampire if he's gay?" question.

[Orrex]

9. So you're saying that he might be

A closet hemosexual?

[krispos42]

16. More like a casket homosexual....

:hide:

[Orrex]

23. That explains his persistent coffin

I just figured that he was a chain-smoker.

[Whisp]

5. just fry him a stake.

[Orrex]

10. I hate you for posting that

:rofl:

[Whisp]

11. good. I was being way too likeable today.

need the balance.
:rofl:

[NaturalHigh]

12. Wouldn't raw steak be a better indication?

[Swede]

6. Not that there's anything wrong with that.

[BlueJazz]

7. Bring home a Quart of Blood and check the next day to see if any of it is missing.

[Orrex]

8. Done and done

I was afraid that I was just being paranoid.

"Vlad, did you bogart my O+ again?"

[kay1864]

21. LOL!

Nominated for a DUzy.

[BlueIris]

13. Put up crucifixes everywhere. See if he takes 'em down. Worked for me once (don't ask).

[noonwitch]

25. How can you say "Don't Ask"? It's the kind of statement that makes me want to know more!

I'm an Anne Rice fan.

[DarkTirade]

14. The whole garlic and vampires thing is just a myth.

Draw a curtain or open the blinds suddenly during the day, see what happens. :evilgrin:

Just, y'know, make sure his half of the bills are already paid first.

[Inchworm]

15. 'scuse me while I whip this out!

drag good.. bite bad...

:yoiks:

[TZ]

17. ask him

how he likes shilling for Big Fang......I hear thats the biggest employer of vampires these days...great pay and benefits.......:rofl:

[sarge43]

18. They never drink ..... wine. n/t

[unpossibles]

19. ask to see his tan lines n/t

[Orrex]

24. Provocative!

And maybe I can offer to show him my etchings...

[Orsino]

20. Long distance. n/t

[DFW]

22. See if he runs when you show him your silver dollar collection.....

[NewJeffCT]

26. If you catch him sleeping, sprinkle holy water on him

If he's a vampire, it will definitely provoke a reaction.

[Orrex]

30. I don't have any holy water. Will balsamic vinaigrette work instead?

Or is that some kind of faux pas?

[NewJeffCT]

32. I doubt that would work

Your best bet would be visiting the nearest Catholic church and making sure you get the priest there to create some...

[Orrex]

33. Not if he's going to guilt me out for my two-decades' absence

I'll take my chances with the vampire.

[MrCoffee]

27. you don't have time to ask. just stake him through the heart now

[Orrex]

29. I'll be right back!

I'll report on the results shortly...

[Locrian]

28. WWBD?

hmmmm....

[Hugin]

31. In the past people have just come out and asked me...

or you can secretly test for it. Vampires don't show up on film.