One Of The Most Precious Souls That Existed On This Earth Left Us Tonight.

[OPERATIONMINDCRIME]

After Stacey's 2 and a half week long battle with pneumonia, she passed on earlier this evening at 11:25PM. Words cannot begin to express the void in my soul right now. The tears today were many, as they were yesterday. We knew yesterday that there was no longer any hope, and that the time was coming. We've been there since. Finally, after the longest day I've ever known, at 11:25 her heart simply slowed down, until it could beat no more. At 11:25 pm, we officially lost one of the most wonderful people that has ever existed.

My tears are great, my fears are greater, my love greater than all. I don't know what I'm going to do. I don't know how to accept that we are no longer a family. I don't know where we're going to move, how long it will take to sell the house, what comes next, or how things will be. What I do know, is that I'll be strong enough to face it. I have a 2 yr old and 4 yr old boys who are going to need me to be stronger than ever and I know I will face that challenge well.

But I'm so exhausted right now, yet can't sleep. There's so much to do these next few days that I have little idea where to start. But I know it will all fall into place. For now, all I know is that my soul cries out for her. It hurts so badly. It is so sudden, so shocking, so hard to accept. But right now I'm running out of words. I can't think straight and I need to lay down. So I'm going to end this here and instead of thinking further, I'm going to just paste the email I've been sending to her multiple worksites as well as my own. I'll post something a bit more coherent and detailed tomorrow. For now, I just want to lay in bed and cry, and do nothing more. Thank you to everyone for your support. You have no idea how much you've helped me through this tough time. I love you all. For now, goodnight. I'm pasting the following since it probably says things better than what I just tried writing from scratch above.



It is with deep sadness and plentiful tears in which I must inform you that my precious wife, Stacey, lost her battle with breast cancer due to complications from pneumonia, earlier last night at 11:25 PM. Stacey was 34 yrs old, but always had the playful spirit of a child. This spirit touched deeply all that knew her, and in her passing touched even more. The nurses and doctors in the ICU unit said they've never had anyone there that has impacted them like she has. They all were in tears, and many gave me their home phone numbers telling me if there's anything I or the kids ever need, to let them know. They said they feel part of our family. That's how special Stacey was, that even in this condition she could so easily touch the hearts of so many. In a world that is at times so corrupt, full of greed and full of false politics, she was never tainted by any of it. She was always so pure, innocent, kind and full of love. All she wanted to do was enjoy everything. All she wanted was to be everything for our children. The love she had for them and the bond she had with them will be forever present.

I sit here through tears knowing that the world just lost one of the most special souls within it. I say this not out of the bias of a husband, but out of sheer raw knowledge as to who she was and how she lived her life. I've never known another person my entire life in which there couldn't be a person found on the entire planet that would say a bad word about her. No person that ever knew her could do anything but love her. She was an angel in life, and so too shall she be in death. The void that will be left from her passing will be immense, and she will be missed by so many.

I take comfort; however, in knowing that she is safe and at peace now. She was so scared every day that the cancer would come back. She hated that she would have to live with this fear every day for the rest of her life. But she need not fear any longer. Peace, joy, love and eternal happiness are upon her now, and in that I find comfort.

For me, I must learn to move forward. I am strong and will do whatever it takes to make sure my young children continue to be happy, healthy, loved and strong. They are my focus now, and though there are so many questions and fears of the future which do not yet have answers, I am confident they will be found and we will all be just fine.

But for now, I grieve. I grieve not only for the loss of a beautiful wife and wonderful mother, but even more because the most decent, innocent and pure person I have ever known is no longer here to bless us with her physical presence. But I know she is within me, and within all that were fortunate enough to have ever known her, and I know her spirit and her magic will never be forgotten.

Thank you for all the support everyone has given us, and may God bless us all.

[KitchenWitch]

1. I am so sorry for your loss.

May God and your undying love for Stacey sustain you through the difficult times ahead.

:hug:

[kitty44]

2. I can hear...

...the ache in your post. I hope you have some peace.

You were lucky to be happy in your life together.

[SeattleGirl]

3. I have no words right now.

My heart is breaking.

:cry:

[ThatsMyBarack]

541. Me neither....

:grouphug:

[Ptah]

4. .

[MrScorpio]

5. My deepest condolences for you and your family

All I can say is that you really need the comfort and help of your family right now. Please don't think of taking care of your needs alone.

You are not alone

[fizzgig]

6. words seem so inadequate right now, omc

my heart aches for you and your family right now

safe passage, stacey

peace and love to you and yours, omc

[amitten]

7. She is with you now and she always will be.

I am so so sorry. She is out of her pain. I wish for comfort for you and those little girls.

:hug:

[Guaranteed]

8. I am so sorry, OMC.

All I can say is that I have total faith that you will see her again someday.

[grace0418]

9. Oh no, oh no, oh no.

I am so very, deeply sorry OMC. I've been thinking of you and your beautiful family constantly. I have no words. Only love, and virtual hugs.

[Trajan]

10. My deepest regrets for you and yours ....

I am so sorry for this; a great loss .... One can only hope for peace and solace for your family ....

[saracat]

11. My deepest condolences. May you and your family always be surrounded by the light and love that was

Stacey. Blessings and comfort to you all.
Saracat

[JI7]

12. i'm so sorry

:hug:

if you need anything from us anytime, just ask.

[fortyfeetunder]

13. OMC, I am so sorry to read about Stacey.

Heavy is my heart to learn you lost your most precious lady. I wish you and your two little ones strength and healing in your sorrow. Stacey will live on in the goodness of you and she is a part of your boys.

Take care of yourself and remember the DU community cares about you.

:hug: :hug: :hug: for you and your boys.

[snowbear]

14. You are so precious to stop in here and let us know- -

If there is anything we can do for you, please let us know.

Be strong - We love you.

I hope that you have plenty of family members with you right now. And just remember, your DU Family is right here if you need us.

[CaliforniaPeggy]

15. My dear OMC...

I am so sorry to hear this news which I had feared was coming...

Safe passage to her...

My support and love to you and your children......

:cry:

:grouphug:

[emilyg]

16. Condolences to you and your family.

[kimpossible]

17. I'm so sorry

[JohnnyLib2]

18. I'm sorry beyond all words.

You and the girls have my sad prayers.

:hug:

[Der Blaue Engel]

19. I'm so sorry for your loss, OMC

Your eloquent posts about Stacey have touched us all.

:hug:

[renate]

20. she knew how much you loved her

That love was such a gift... you and your boys made her life a happy one, though it was much too short.

I'm so sorry. Your loss is terrible. And she was so young.

She'll live on in your heart, in your boys' hearts, and in the hearts of everybody who knew her. Nobody who knew her will ever think about her without love.

That's quite a legacy.

:grouphug:

[SPKrazy]

21. Oh man...

I'm so sorry OMC

my prayers are with you and your kids

perspective...

:hug: :hug: :hug:

[Fenris]

22. May you find peace and strength

:hug:

Death, be not proud, though some have called thee
Mighty and dreadful, for thou art not so ;
For those, whom thou think'st thou dost overthrow,
Die not, poor Death, nor yet canst thou kill me.
From rest and sleep, which but thy pictures be,
Much pleasure, then from thee much more must flow,
And soonest our best men with thee do go,
Rest of their bones, and soul's delivery.
Thou'rt slave to Fate, chance, kings, and desperate men,
And dost with poison, war, and sickness dwell,
And poppy, or charms can make us sleep as well,
And better than thy stroke ; why swell'st thou then ?
One short sleep past, we wake eternally,
And Death shall be no more ; Death, thou shalt die.

-- John Donne

[enigmatic]

23. I don't know what to say, OMC

I've been around death most of my life and I have an idea how hard this hurts right now.

You're not alone; there are many, many people both here on DU and in your circle of friends and familywho will offer you and hand and a shoulder to cry and rage on; never be afraid to take those friends up on their offer. You need to grieve, OMC; it's natural, and it will help you in your soul more than you'll ever know.

I'll be thinking about you, Stacey, and your kids today, and I'll still be sending all the good vibes I can your way.

:hug:

[idgiehkt]

24. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

I am so sorry for your loss. :hug: :hug: :hug:

[Heidi]

25. Strength and peace to you, your children and all whose lives Stacey touched, OMC.

:hug:

[Lucinda]

26. Your friends and family remain in my prayers

She sounds like an incredible woman. I'll keep you all im my prayers.

[K8-EEE]

27. She is one with the divine light

Her time with you will resonate always with all the people she touched, like ripples in a pond. You will see her light shine through your children also.

Peaceful, healing vibes to you tonight. Your loss is so great but so is her spirit, it is all around you and it will help you through.

[Susang]

28. I'm so very sorry

:cry:

[pnwmom]

29. I'm so very sorry, OMC. I know you will honor Stacey forever

in the kind of parent you are to your children. God bless you all.

[Hekate]

30. May her name be remembered for a blessing.

The miracle you/we prayed for was the love you had for each other.

Thank you, dear one, for taking the time tonight to let your many friends here know the news. :cry:

Rest now, and for now let tomorrow take care of itself.

:hug:

Hekate

[Sinistrous]

31. My profound condolences on your loss.

Sinistrous

[flamingyouth]

32. I am so sorry.

I've sat here staring at my screen trying to come up with something to say.

All I can say is that my heart goes out to you and your family. I've been praying for all of you since I first heard of her diagnosis and I feel like I've grown to know her through your posts and by watching her on video. Just yesterday I watched the one of her on the day her hair started to fall out and thought, "Wow, what an amazing and strong person." I wish I had the honor of knowing her in person.

You and your sons will continue to be in our prayers, and you know that you have so many friends here. Again, I am so very, very sorry. :cry:

[mvd]

33. I just had to check one more time, and what a heartbreaking update

I'm so sorry. Not much more that words can say right now. DUers will be there for you in your grief like they were in your hope.

[demgrrrll]

34. I am so sorry for your loss. You are in my thoughts and prayers.

.

[Raksha]

35. Your love for her has been such an inspiration to me,

I can't even begin to tell you how much. May she rest in peace.

[Archae]

36. So sorry to hear this, OMC.

I know I didn't post on the previous updates, because I really didn't know what to say.

Always so hard to lose a loved one.

[eridani]

37. The joy and pride in your wedding photo says it all

We are here for you :grouphug:

[Mythsaje]

38. You have my sympathy, OMC...

For what it's worth.

[EFerrari]

39. OMC

She will always be with you. Always.

:hug:

[Control-Z]

40. I am so sorry.

So very sorry.

[uppityperson]

41. Rest in peace Stacey and my condolences to you OMC

[kimmylavin]

42. Oh, OMC...

My thoughts and my heart are with you and your boys right now.
I'm so sorry...

[FloridaJudy]

43. {{{{{OMC}}}}}

I hold you and your family in my heart and prayers. Nothing we say can ease your pain, but if there is anything we can do to help you and your children through this, please ask.

She is a beautiful soul indeed, and your words have inspired all of us.

Go in peace, Stacey.

[Breeze54]

44. I am grieving with you....

[pinto]

45. OMC, I'm so sorry you lost Stacey. She was lucky to have you, and you her. Take care.

pinto

[orleans]

46. oh...omc....

i am so very sorry...

[Eurobabe]

47. If I can see through my tears...

:cry: :hug:

I have followed your threads for the past two weeks OMC, and I weep for you and your family. Life seems so unfair sometimes.

I don't know what else to say, but your tributes to your wife have been so heartfelt, emotional and eloquent, we all feel the deep love you have for her, may that sustain you through these difficult times. Take care of your boys, they are going to need you.

Surrounding you with love and light :grouphug:
- The entire 48%er family

[Lethe]

48. I'm not good at this kind of stuff

I always mess up when I try to put things into words. I hope for the best for you and your family.

[SKKY]

49. I'm so very sorry for your loss OMC, but take comfort in the fact....

...that you are one of the lucky people in this world who has felt the love of a truly remarkable woman. My thoughts, as they have been for the past few weeks, are with you and your family in these difficult times.

[gateley]

50. A beautiful tribute for that beautiful soul. You have our love and support. nt

[John Kerry VonErich]

51. Oh shit, bro! :(

Sincerest condolences on this very tragic loss.

[lligrd]

52. I Was So Scared To Ever See This Post

and it hurts. So sorry OMC. It just seems so unfair and she fought so hard. And you fought so hard for her. A big hug from me to you and the boys.

[adadem]

53. Our thoughts and

prayers are with you. Know that many friends here have you and your boys in their hearts at this sad time.

[yewberry]

54. I'm so, so sorry. We all hoped it wouldn't come to this.

My best to you and your kids.

May God hold her in the hollow of His hand.

[Crunchy Frog]

55. No words, OMC.

:cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry:

[Blue-Jay]

56. My deepest condolences, OMC.

She sounds like she was a wonderful woman, and your loss is breaking my heart.

I wish there was something else I could say.

[pokerfan]

57. I am so sorry

I don't have the words.

[RFKHumphreyObama]

58. Oh no OMC. Words can't even begin to convey how sorry I am

for you and your children. I'm so, so very sorry it ended this way. Rest assured that you and your family and all the family and friends of Stacey have my deepest and sincerest thoughts, prayers, condolences and sympathies.

Stacey seemed like a wonderful, kind, sweet, generous, kind and loving person. Your posts here always so eloquently conveyed the depth of her personality and your total and pure love and devotion for her.

I know the legacy of her love, kindness and generosity will live on in the hearts and souls of all whose lives she touched and that in her own way, she made the world a better place through her presence here. And I know she is in a better place where, as you say, she will find peace, joy, love and eternal happiness.

I know I am several continents away but if there's anything I do to help, please let me know. We're all here for you OMC:hug: :hug: :hug: I'm so, so very sorry :hug:

[dailykoff]

59. I'm so sorry.

This is very sad news.

:grouphug:

[regnaD kciN]

60. I have no words...just tears...

:cry:

I never knew Stacey except through your postings, but, if it could have been possible to exchange my life for hers, I would have done it -- because the world needed someone like her more than it could ever need someone like me.

:hug:

[grasswire]

61. the butterfly effect

Because of Stacey, many will hold their loved ones tight tonight in sorrow. Mothers will ache for your boys' tender hearts -- hearts that should not know this kind of pain. All of us would shield you and your little family as we try to shield our own. I don't know why you lost her. I only know that in a million small ways, she inspires all of us right now, this moment, to be better people. Better at love and better at being alive. Rest easy, Stacey dear. Your strength and beauty live on.

[Raine]

62. I'm very sorry

for your loss, you and your children are in my thoughts. :hug:

[Tsiyu]

63. Peace to you, Brother

What a heartbreaking post.

Hey,,,you are ALWAYS a family to your beautiful boys. She will ALWAYS be their Mom.

I hope there are people around you now to help with the boys and to comfort you.

I am so sorry to hear of Stacey's passing, OMC. She lived well.

:grouphug:

[avrdream]

64. I'm sorry my prayers weren't strong enough to keep her here, OMC,

But I'm very happy that you were married to someone who sounds so incredibly beautiful. I am glad that life blessed you with her and your two children.

Our thoughts and prayers stay with you.

:hug:

[MazeRat7]

65. I so hoped we would never have to read this post..Our prayers go out you both. -nt

[DianaForRussFeingold]

66. OMC, You and Stacey touched all our hearts ...

We love you! :hug:

[Kagemusha]

67. I'm so sorry to hear that.

Heartfelt condolences.

[JCMach1]

68. I am so sorry...

:(

[LibertyorDeath]

69. Damn !

Damn :grouphug:

I've seen you post here for years OPERATIONMINDCRIME

Always articulate thoughtful posts

I only recently realized what you are going through

You are very courageous & the love you have for Stacey is a once in a life time

thing something to be cherished.

She sounds like a Truly Wonderful Person.

I am Very sorry for your Loss.

[Bunny]

70. I'm so sorry for your loss.

She must have been a wonderful person. :hug:

[Garbo 2004]

71. So very sorry, OMC...

:cry:

:hug:

[pop goes the weasel]

72. my condolences to you and the boys

I can scarcely even imagine what you are going through. May you find strength you didn't know you had, and if that runs out, may you always find friends still beside you.

[ClayZ]

73. I am so sorry for your loss.

Your love for Stacey touched the hearts of all of us.

[Manifestor_of_Light]

74. May she live on in blessed memory, OMC.

I saw your YouTube video where you sang to her at your wedding reception.
That was so beautiful. Truly moving.

My deepest sympathies from a fellow keyboard player and lifelong musician.


"It was not the poetry that Omar Khayyam wrote that was important; it was the poetry of his life that lives on."

--the Grandfather (present day) in the movie "The Keeper:The Legend of Omar Khayyam" (2005).

Omar Khayyam, astronomer & mathematician of Persia, wrote the famous book of four line verses called The Rubaiyat.


Stealing this from an excellent screenwriter, the poetry of her life will live on in your life and your sons' lives and everyone who knew her.

:grouphug:

[laylah]

75. I have no words

OMC :cry: Love, strength, and blessings to you and the boys. :hug:

[qanda]

76. I'm so sorry OMC

Please let us know what we can do to help. I have no words but I cry and hurt for you and your family. Somehow I feel all the tears being shed for Stacey will be bottled up and used to pour into your hearts as a healing salve. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

[Pierogi_Pincher]

77. I give to you

my deepest and most heartfelt sympathy.

A mystery of life--she is now made whole.

I invoke strength. You have two little flowers that need be nurtured. Bone of your bone, flesh of your flesh.

Blessed be Stacey's memory.

My humble prayers.

[datadiva]

78. So very sad OMC

She was incredibly brave and so are you. I found when I lost my parents that talking to them daily helped me alot. Let friends and relatives help. It will help them and you to get through the next few days. Peace be with you.

[BanzaiBonnie]

79. I am so sorry

There are no words.

[alphafemale]

80. I'm so sorry.

You and your family will remain in my thoughts and prayers.

[Drum]

81. I can only join

the chorus of us that mourn this day day with you, and those of us who have lost loved ones in this inexplicable way. As one who has "been there" (with a parent,) I urge you to deal with your heart first and not to sweat the other details. Your bond with Stacey has been foremost in our thoughts and prayers lately, and I hope that the other "outer-world" stuff, no matter now tempting, does not preclude you from this time as it shall be. Please know that people around you are supporting you, and grieving right along with you.
All blessings...Drum

[RiverStone]

82. Very sad to hear...

sending you... :grouphug:

[Trillo]

83. I'm sorry to read about this.

Best wishes to you and your family.

[nosmokes]

84. Condolences, loving thoughts and prayers from our house to your's OMC.

Smoke rises.

[bling bling]

85. Thank you, OMC.

Thanks for staying true to yourself, true to the strong-minded person you are. I believe you when you say you and your kids will be ok.

Your strength throughout this tragedy and your continued strength now is like a gift to your wife, your children, and to this community who's so obviously been touched by your lives and who are grieving with you now. The greatest gift I can think of in death would be the comfort of hearing my loved ones say "I am confident we will all be just fine." The last thing I would want is for the people I love to fall apart and lose their spirit for life.

Thanks for reaching out like you have to the people in the online community. I don't even really post here anymore but I found out about it from another site so who knows how many other people outside DU have been touched by this experience you shared here. It's actually pretty amazing just how touched so many of us were considering the detached nature of an anonymous and virtual community.

Anyway, I'm so sorry this happened. I wish you and your family the best.

[Guava Jelly]

86. I am so sorry

There are no words.
:hug:

[Ecumenist]

87. Oh dear OMC,

God bless and keep you and your sweet little ones, may He buoy you up in this storm, hold you hand and guide you using the hearts and the love of all of us around you, related by blood or heart to wrap you in comfort, peace and smoothing your way. I cannot imagine what you have gone through and although I've never spoken to you directly, I want you to know that tonight I will light a candle for you and those sweet little boys. My deepest and most heartfelt condolences.

[crispini]

88. Deepest sympathies.....

:grouphug: to you and your boys.... a prayer for Stacey....

[Jeanette in FL]

89. I am so sorry, OMC

There are no words. only love to you and your boys.

[Dulcinea]

90. My deepest condolences.

I'm very sorry for your loss. O8)

[MissHoneychurch]

91. I am so sorry OMC

I was so hoping and wishing that Stacey pulls through. May she be at peace now.

:hug:

[Autumn Colors]

92. I'm so sorry

I don't post here much, but you've been in my thoughts as this has been going on. Let the good memories carry you through this.

[OregonBlue]

93. We at DU will grieve with you. You are not alone.

[Contrary1]

94. I am so sorry.

:cry:

[leftynyc]

95. I'm so very sorry for your loss

You and your children are in my prayers. May God comfort all of you.

[flyarm]

96. My sadness is overwhelming for you OMC and your boys...Stacy was taken too young..

but may she rest in a peace now.

I just have no words..only tears ..

fly

[BobMorr]

97. You and your children are in our prayers

I'm so sorry for your loss. She is now in peace. She's in a better place now. You will eventually be together again. Peace my friend.:cry:

[Silver Gaia]

98. I am so deeply sorry to know this. My heart is with you.

Your Stacey was a beautiful human being, inside and out. She touched us all.

[WilliamPitt]

99. I'm so sorry.

:hug:

[NewJeffCT]

100. My deepest condolences

I'm so sorry for your loss.

Thank you for giving us this update, as I know it must have been very hard to do.

[DemExpat]

101. I hope that your love sustains you, OMC.

So very sorry for your loss.

DemEx

[blondie58]

102. (((OMC)))

I am so sorry.

[cali]

103. I'm terribly sorry to hear this, OMC

My thoughts are with you and yours.

[donheld]

104. I'm so very sorry

:hug: She's home now, with Molly and Ann Richards.

[zippy890]

105. peace

so sorry for your loss.
take care of yourself

[xchrom]

106. and may god bless stacey, you and your family now --

and may god's peace be with your family in this your time of grief.

i'm so very, very sorry.

[TZ]

107. I'm so sorry OMC

It's always a shock to hear about someone so young dying....My best to you and your family.:hug: :cry:

[BlueIris]

108. Terribly sorry. All best. We are here for you. nt

[conscious evolution]

109. What a bummer

My thoughts and prayers are yours today.

Peace and love
ce

[annabanana]

110. . love to you all

[NoPasaran]

111. I'm so sorry for you and your family

[salin]

112. Deepest condolences

for the loss of your wife. Sending prayers of comfort, peace and strength to you and your family and all who were touched by her. :hug:

[Skittles]

113. I am so sorry

deeply sorry....we are here for you

[Pale Blue Dot]

114. ...

:hug:

[helderheid]

115. My sweet OMC

I feared from the long silence that you had lost her. OMC, I have no words. I am so sorry and my heart aches for you. I can't imagine your grief but want you to know we love you and grieve with you. If there is anything I can do, please tell me.

All my love,
Clarity

[yellowdogintexas]

116. I am so very sorry. When I was falling asleep last night, I tried to

focus a prayer/blessing on her and could not get the focus to work for her, but it kept coming up to focus on you and your family. This was bout 11:30 pm Central time. So I mantra'd myself to sleep with you and your boys on my mind.


It is good she is no longer in pain, and your pain will lessen as time goes on. Rejoice in the life you had together and love your boys

[lildreamer316]

117. I have so much love for you and your family.

I will hold you there in my heart for all days....

[Nickster]

118. I am so sorry for your loss.

[PADemD]

119. My deepest sympathy and condolences to you and your family

[cal04]

120. I'm so sorry

My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family

:hug:

[ms liberty]

121. My dearest OMC - I am so sorry...

There are few words that can give you solace at this terrible time. Know that all of us here at DU keep you in our prayers and send you healing vibes and love. Be strong for your boys, but make sure you take time away from your boys to express your grief in the ways that they will not yet understand. You will need it, and ultimately it will be better for them - and YOU. I believe in an existence after physical death. and I believe she is now whole and healthy, and will be watching over you and her babies from her new "residence." I also believe she will be feeding you reserves of strength to help you deal with the tragedy that took her from you. She and her love for her family will always be there for you. Lean on your friends and family who will be ready to help you in any way - almost to the point of annoyance, which I can say from personal experience!

Do what you need to do, but keep in touch with us - we are here for you when you need us or want us. I'm sure there are DU'ers that you can talk to and depend on when you need a friend. Come to us when you need someone to talk to, or need the distraction from the difficult days ahead, and rejoin us fully when you are able.
My love and hope, and all the healing vibes I can muster go out to you and your family, my friend.

[PeaceNikki]

122. Peace and strength to you and your family.

My heart breaks for you. :(

[vanboggie]

123. I'm so sorry, OMC

I can't imagine your pain, but my thoughts are with you. How lucky your boys are to have a dad who loves them so much and will share stories about their mom with them and keep her memory alive. Be strong for them, but also take time to grieve and heal. It won't be an easy road, but you'll get through because you love Stacey and your kids.

[MadHound]

124. Oh, OMC, I'm so very sorry for your loss

:hug:
Know that you have people here that care about you and support you. Take care of yourself and your children, and don't make any drastic decisions during this period of grief.

My thoughts and prayers are still with you and your children. There are no glib words that will make this easier for you, but know that time will indeed take the edge off of your pain, and will heal your wounds.

Again, I'm sorry for your loss,:hug:

[NRaleighLiberal]

125. So very, very sorry for your loss. Your family is in our prayers.

Thank you for having the strength and trust to share your story, so that all of us here who care can learn a bit about life, death, love, each other, and ourselves.

Craig from Raleigh

[Lars39]

126. I'm so sorry for your loss, OMC.

:hug:

[TheCentepedeShoes]

127. I'm so very sorry...

:cry:

[Spacemom]

128. I'm so sorry, OMC

My deepest sympathies for you and your family.


A ship sails and I stand watching till she fades on the horizon and someone at my side says She is gone.
Gone where? Gone from my sight, that is all. She is just as large now as
when I last saw her. Her diminished size and total loss from my sight is in me, not in her.
And just at the moment when someone at my side says she is gone there are
others who are watching her coming over their horizon and other voices take
up a glad shout There she comes!

That is what dying is. An horizon and just the limit of our sight.

Lift us up, Oh Lord, that we may see further

~Bishop Brent~

[Midlodemocrat]

129. Eternal rest grant unto her, O Lord.

And may perpetual light shine upon her.

I am so sorry, OMC. There are no words to convey the depth of my sorrow for you and those beautiful little boys.

[I Have A Dream]

130. I am crying with you, OMC. Stacey has also touched me.

I am so sorry for your loss, but I hope that you can still feel her presence to give you comfort during this time.

My heart is filled with love for your family. Please know that you're not alone.

:grouphug:

:cry:

[SalmonChantedEvening]

131. My deepest sympathies OMC

:hug: :cry:

[KT2000]

132. I am so sorry

Peace to you and your family.

[terrya]

133. I am so, so sorry, OMC

I'm reading this...and am heartbroken. What a beautiful, courageous lady Stacey was. And what a loving wife and mother Stacey was.

My deepest, heartfelt condolences to you and your family.

Oh, man. :cry:

:hug:

[Ferretherder]

134. OMC, I'm very sorry to hear of your loss.

Please believe that all of DU is there for you, and any of us will do what we can, pitifully insufficient as it may be, to help in any way possible. I can't imagine what you are going through right now. I only wish that words could heal and help, but, right now, I know there isn't much that can be said that will mean anything. Let those around you help you to be strong - and if you need it, let US help.

Ferret.

[Puglover]

135. I'm terribly sorry.

I was hoping for a miracle. My thoughts are with you and the kids.

Pug

[Puglover]

136. I'm terribly sorry.

I was hoping for a miracle. My thoughts are with you and the kids.

Pug

[Ms. Toad]

137. Treasure your sons,

Stacey lives on in them and they will be a constant reminders of your never-ending love for her, and the earthly embodiment of her never-ending love for you. May you bring each other much comfort in this time of loss and transition.

[sarge43]

138. ....

I am so sorry.

:cry::hug:

[MANative]

139. My deepest condolences to you, OMC.

So very sad to hear this news.

[Crabby Appleton]

140. My deepest condolences for you and your family

so sorry for your loss.

[livvy]

141. My most sincere sympathies.

I've followed your reports, and come to be very fond of both of you through them. I am very sorry for your loss, and for the pain both of you have gone through. I wish there was something I could say to help lessen your grief, but I know your feelings right now, cannot be healed with words.

Your wife sounded like she was a very special person, and from your words, I know that you are as well.

Take care of yourself and your children. Stacey will always be with you to help you along your path in life.

Grieve well and heal through your grief, and the knowledge that you loved as fully as you could, will continue to love, and your wonderful wife knew that, maybe more than you will ever know.

livvy

[Lyric]

142. I'm heartbroken for you, OMC.

I'm so glad you have videos of Stacey, to help your little boys remember her--especially the youngest one. I wish there was something more that I could do. I'm so sorry for your loss and your pain.
:cry: :hug:

[johnnie]

143. Please accept my sincere condolences

My thoughts are with you and your family.
Take care OMC

[southern_belle]

144. My deepest condelences to you

and your family. I'm so sorry for your loss.


:hug:

[Tektonik]

145. Stacey, RIP

My deepest condolences to you and everyone who has known and loved Stacey.

[KatyaR]

146. So very, very sorry for you and your boys.

I hope you can find some peace in that you took such good care of her in her last days.

Love to you . . . . :hug:

[MelissaB]

147. I'm so sorry!

My deepest condolences. :hug:

[tom_paine]

148. I am so very sorry for your loss, OMC.

n/t

[OmmmSweetOmmm]

149. ((((((OMC and children)))))))) I am so sorry for the loss of your beloved wife and mother. eom

[OzarkDem]

150. Dear OMC

Words cannot express our sorrow at your loss. We've all hoped and prayed for her recovery and it saddens us terribly that Stacey has been taken from you and your family. Its a terrible tragedy and it hurts so much to see this disease destroy so many lives. I probably speak for others in saying we would have given anything to see her survive.

You know you can count on everyone here for any help or support you need. Please take care of yourself and hug those two boys for us.

:grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug:

[gademocrat7]

151. Dear OMC

I am so very sorry for your loss. My prayers are with you and your children.

[Delphinus]

152. My deepest sympathies

to you and your family. May Stacey's light and love continue on in this world through your love for her. :hug:

[peacefreak]

153. I am so sorry for your loss.

Look to your little boys & you will see the reflection of their mother's love. Your time with her was too short. I will keep you all in my thoughts in the days to come.

[Freedomofspeech]

154. Bless you and those two sons...

I wish I had known her.

[Callalily]

155. My heart goes

out to you, your children, and your family.

[boston bean]

156. My deepest sympathies for you and your family.

It is a terrible loss for you all. Stay strong for the boys, they need you more than ever.

Take care of yourself.

---massdemm

[Berry Cool]

157. I'm so sorry, OMC

Your loss cuts close to my heart, and makes me ache for you, even though we have never met.

You are still a family. You always will be. It may be hard to feel that now, but you are. And Stacey will be there guiding you all the way.

I will keep you and your boys in my thoughts and prayers.

[greatauntoftriplets]

158. My deepest condolences to you and your family....

Stacey's loss is an enormous tragedy for you all.

[Cathyclysmic]

159. Oh, OMC. I am so sorry.

May she be in eternal peace. :hug:

[Sugar Smack]

160. My dear OMC, I'm so sorry.

Words cannot express it.

[blue neen]

161. Please accept my deepest sympathies

to you and your family.

[Maiden England]

162. I am so sorry, my heart aches for you,

Your story has touched my heart deeply, although I have followed in it in silence, but prayed with all my might for a different outcome. Stacey has touched the hearts of so many, and through following events here, people she had never met have been inspired by her, and you in your love and support for her. I am praying with all my heart that you find love and strength and courage to make it through the times ahead, I hope you can feel the love of many, supporting you in this time.


Funeral Blues

Stop all the clocks, cut off the telephone,
Prevent the dog from barking with a juicy bone,
Silence the pianos and with muffled drum
Bring out the coffin, let the mourners come.

Let aeroplanes circle moaning overhead
Scribbling on the sky the message He is Dead.
Put crepe bows round the white necks of the public doves,
Let the traffic policemen wear black cotton gloves.

He was my North, my South, my East and West,
My working week and my Sunday rest,
My noon, my midnight, my talk, my song;
I thought that love would last forever: I was wrong.

The stars are not wanted now; put out every one,
Pack up the moon and dismantle the sun,
Pour away the ocean and sweep up the woods;
For nothing now can ever come to any good.

W.H. Auden

[La Lioness Priyanka]

163. i am so sorry.

[Love Bug]

164. My deepest condolences

You and your boys will be in my thoughts and prayers.

[maddezmom]

165. So sorry for your loss

Prayers are with you and your family.

[warrior1]

166. I'm so sorry.

[AirmensMom]

167. I'm so sorry, OMC.

:cry: There's nothing else I can say. I'm just so sorry.


:hug:

[Vinca]

168. I'm so very, very sorry for your loss.

[Marrah_G]

169. I'm so sorry OMC

I truly wish I could take away all that pain. All I can say is that my PMs are always open and if you ever need a shoulder to cry on, I am there.

Much love,

Marrah

[graywarrior]

170. Peace, Stacey.

Take care, OMC.

[unpossibles]

171. I'm sorry to hear that

I know it's hard to deal with, and that it will continue to be hard but I wish you and your kids the best.

[shadowknows69]

172. Good journey to your Stacey OMC, I'm so so sorry.

[fed-up]

173. I am so, so sorry-may you find the strength & peace to stay strong for yourself & boys {{{hugs}}} nt

[Subdivisions]

174. I can't even imagine how much your heart aches right

now, OMC. Please accept my most heartfelt sympathies and I will be wishing peace and strength for you and your two boys.

Rest in peace, Stacey.

[Call Me Wesley]

175. Safe passage, Stacey.

Might your suffering be over. Peace and comfort to you and yours, OMC.

[EstimatedProphet]

176. I am so sorry

I can't even imagine what it would be like to go through that.

I am sorry.

[rateyes]

177. As you describe Stacey, OMC, it is clear to see

that while she had few years in her life, she had more life in her years than most. You and your children and all the family have my deepest sympathy. I know that right now the hurt is tremendous. Hug your kids, and allow them and yourself time to grieve...and, remember, grief manifests itself in many ways, and all of them are normal. You and your children will get through this.

Peace and Love be forever yours.

[Fox Mulder]

178. My condolences to you and your family.

:( :cry: :hug:

[bluethruandthru]

179. I'm so sorry OMC!

I can only imagine how hard this must be for you now. Thank you for sharing all you've been through these past weeks. It's made me realize more than ever how very precious life is. Stacey will live on in your heart and the hearts of your children. I wish only the best for you all. :hug:

[jody]

180. My sincere sympathy to you and yours for the loss of a beloved wife. When one truly loves another,

the pain of losing them never goes away.

I know because I lost my wife four years ago after 47 years of marriage.

[crim son]

181. She lives within you

and she will never be gone. I can't tell you how sorry I am, nor how I admire both you and Stacey for the courage of your struggle.

[Klukie]

182. My heart aches for you......

I send you all my love and strength. You are a wonderfully loving husband and Stacy was equally blessed to have you in her life.

Love
Jenny

[muriel_volestrangler]

183. My deepest sympathies to you and your family, OMC

I can't imagine the loss you're all feeling.

[sniffa]

184. you're a tough bastid

and i know you'LL be strong for your kids.

my condoLences and thoughts are with you and your famiLy OMC. :hug:

[Ellen Forradalom]

185. Oh, OMC. I am so very sorry.

I lost a beloved brother, aged 31, to cancer. So you have my empathy.

We all love you, and will help in any way called upon.

May God be with you in this time.

Love,

Ellen.

[momto3]

186. I am so sorry for your loss. eom

[Buns_of_Fire]

187. There'll be one more star in the evening sky tonight

I promise you, I'll look for it. Godspeed, Stacey.

[mmonk]

188. I am so sorry OMC.

I'm thinking of you and your family at this time. Wish there was something I could do. Best wishes through this time.

[Debbi801]

189. OMC, I am so sorry for your loss...

:cry: Words cannot express how sad I am for you and your children. I will continue to keep you all in my thoughts and prayers. :hug:

Debbi

[malaise]

190. Deepest sympathy

:cry:

[zanne]

191. Stacey will guide your way.

If your love for each other was that strong, I'm sure she'll give you a helping hand if you ask her. Please take care of yourself, and take on one thing at a time, a day at a time. All my best.

[Mushroom]

192. I'm so sorry OMC

So very sorry for your loss.

Kathy

[Richardo]

193. Prayers for peace and strength to you and your boys, OMC

I'm so sorry.

[NC_Nurse]

194. I am so sorry to hear this, OMC.

Godspeed, Stacey.
My thoughts and prayers are with you and your boys. I am SO sorry
for your loss. :cry: :hug: :grouphug:

[meti57b]

195. OMC, ... I am so sorry to hear of this.

[rockymountaindem]

196. I'm so sorry to hear that

My condolences n/t

[Rabrrrrrr]

197. I'm sorry to hear it - sad news, indeed, after a long haul.

Sympathies and good thoughts for you!

[BrklynLib at work]

198. There are no words to express my sorrow.

Not seeing a post yesterday made me so apprehensive...I knew that when I signed on today it would be sad news.
My heart is breaking for you, OMC...and your children. The battle that you and Stacey fought was beyond valiant.
My hands are shaking...I cannot continue right now.
:cry: :grouphug:


Say not in grief that she is no more
but say in thankfulness that she was
A death is not the extinguishing of a light,
but the putting out of the lamp
because the dawn has come.

- Tagore

[bettyellen]

199. i am so sorry for your loss, OMC.

[regnaD kciN]

200. A song lyric, in memory...

Language of the Heart
lyrics by Jim Stewart

You will always fly, even though your journey’s over
The stars will chart your sky and the moon will be your lover

Fortune plays a lonely game that forces some to part
But here and there are much the same, in the language of the heart

You will always sail, even though the winds would leave you
Your ship will never fail and the sea can never grieve you

Fortune plays a lonely game that forces some to part
But here and there are much the same, in the language of the heart

You will always sing, though the melody lies broken
Your voice will always ring, though the words are never spoken

Fortune plays a lonely game that forces some to part
But here and there are much the same, in the language of the heart

You will always be, even though time would disown you
For you have set us free, those among us who have known you

Fortune plays a lonely game that forces some to part
But here and there are much the same, in the language of the heart


I've had this song stuck in my head for the past few hours.

[GCP]

201. This was the post I was hoping never to see

I am so sorry, OMC. Love and healing to you and the boys :hug:

[SheWhoMustBeObeyed]

202. My deepest condolences to you and your family

[LibraLiz1973]

203. I'm so sorry OMC. Prayers are with you, the boys & all Stacey loved.

[sleepyhead]

204. So sorry for your loss.

May your heart find peace.

[bicentennial_baby]

205. You are still a family, OMC...

Stacey is right there alongside you, you just can't see her. Blessings to you and your boys. :hug:

[coffeenap]

206. My heart breaks for you.

You are a wonderful person and please let me join all of your other online friends in sending my deepest condolences.
Please come here to talk when you are able, and know that we are all real people, really caring. m.

[Cass]

207. Oh, OMC, I am so very sorry.

Please accept my condolences to you and your family. You and your precious boys will remain in my thoughts and prayers.

[kedrys]

208. I am so very sorry

:hug:

[Sanity Claws]

209. I am so sorry for you loss.

[lightningandsnow]

210. My thoughts are with you.

So sorry for your loss.

[Tess49]

211. I'm so sorry, OMC. I cry with you. Please know that the two of

you have touched many lives. Safe passage, Stacey.

[RB TexLa]

212. God be with you

[spacelady]

213. So very sorry for your loss, OMC. Please take care.

[Catshrink]

214. I'm so sorry, OMC.

Peace be with you and your boys. :grouphug:

[lizziegrace]

215. She lives on

in your heart and in your children. I'm so sorry for your loss.

[distantearlywarning]

216. I am so sorry.

Condolences to you and your family.

[Liberal Veteran]

217. Damn. I am so very sorry.

I wish there was something I could say that would ease your pain.

[Inchworm]

218. I am so sorry for your loss OMC

Words cannot express how heavy my heart is.

:hug:

[Starbucks Anarchist]

219. My deepest condolences to your family, OMC.

:hug: :hug: :hug: :grouphug:

[Frustratedlady]

220. Oh, Dear! I am so sorry to hear of Stacey's passing.

Although your heart is broken and you feel you will never be whole again, please believe that Stacey is nearby. You will feel it when peace finally floods over you, you will see it in the actions and laughter of your boys, you will know it through small ways that Stacey will choose to let you know she is by your side.

The love you gave her in your short life together will be returned to you ten-fold. Watch for it and accept it with all your heart. It is beautiful and it will comfort you.

Bless you all.

[WinkyDink]

221. {{{{{OMC and Children}}}}} You have my deepest sympathy. God bless you.

[mainegreen]

222. All I can say is that I hope you find the path you need to find to get your family through this.

:(
:grouphug:

[Suziq]

223. My Deepest Condolences, OMC

I am so very sorry for the loss of this terrific, young woman. May she rest in peace. :hug:


:cry:

[MilesColtrane]

224. She will live forever inside you and in the hearts of your boys.

You have my most heartfelt condolences.

[Imalittleteapot]

225. We are all aching for you OMC.

Rest in Peace Precious Soul.

[seemunkee]

226. You have my deepest and most sincere sympathy

Peace to you and your family.

[Deep13]

227. Obviously, nothing anyone writes will make this any easier.

I know this is horrible for you. All I can say is be sure to take any help that is offered to you. Don't try to get through this on your own. I am so sorry about your loss.

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

228. I am so very sorry.

[KittyWampus]

229. Deepest Sympathy. The Love your family shares is eternal.

[cmd]

230. My deepest sympathy

I hold you in my thoughts today.

[InkAddict]

231. I am so sorry to hear about Stacy

It's clear she lived her life with a gentle strength, so full of the spirit of love. May you and your family be comforted in that love and accept our sympathy that surrounds you virtually with the mightiest of hugs and may you and your family go forward with your on-going yet new determination to follow her example of courage in the face of overwhelming odds. For some unfathomable reason, everything is as needs be. Peace with with you, now and always.

[Withywindle]

232. I am so, so sorry.

Words can't express it. Both of you have been so loving and brave. But her suffering is over, and she's pure spirit now and will still be with you always.

:hug:

[Magrittes Pipe]

233. I'm sorry.

I'm terribly sorry.

[electron_blue]

234. I'm so very sorry, OMC. It's clear she was a beautiful person.

I'll keep you and your children in my thoughts. My sister lost her husband to something very similar and sudden and had 2 children also - 3 yrs and 1 yr old. She lived through it, and I know you will also. There are resources out there for you that you don't know about yet, but will find out in time, try not to think about the future right now.

[Blue Diadem]

235. Oh OMC, I'm so sorry.

Thank you for sharing Stacey with us. She was and will continue to be a special lady in all our hearts.

My heart is breaking for you and your two sweet little boys.

:hug:

[AllyCat]

236. God bless you and give you strength at this painful time

I'm so sorry. Thinking of you and praying for you and your little ones.

[Canuckistanian]

237. So sorry for your loss.

My thoughts are with you.

[tuvor]

238. My deepest sympathies, OMC.

[lukasahero]

239. OMC, I am so, so sorry for your loss.

My prayers are with you and your family and I wish you peace.

[Coyote_Bandit]

240. .

I'm so sorry. While I don't pretend to understand your grief I am certain you will honor Stacey's memory and cherish the many gifts she gave you.

:hug:

[mzteris]

241. I am so sorry for your loss.

She was a very special woman. She lived knowing the love of a wonderful man and two beautiful boys.

You're a strong person and your sons are lucky to have you. I wish there was more I could say, more I could do, to help. I can only shed tears and offer up my prayers for you and your family in this time.

[racaulk]

242. I'm so sorry, OMC.

You have my deepest and most sincere sympathies for your loss. Thank you for being strong for your sons, they will need it during this time. I wish you and your loved ones nothing but the best.

And RIP Stacey... :cry:

[Phillycat]

243. Thank god you have your sons to get you through this.

I am so very sorry for the loss of your lovely wife. I have been praying and will continue to pray. Bless you and your boys.

[flvegan]

244. I am so terribly sorry.

The words don't exist.

[noonwitch]

245. I'm really sorry.

There's not much more I can really say except that.

[Lost4words]

246. I am so sorry. Words cannot express. nm

[Tinksrival]

247. She is very proud of you.

It shows on the videos. Take comfort.

I'm so sorry.




This could be our last good night together
We may never pass this way again.
Just let me enjoy it 'til it's over, or forever
Please don't tell me how the story ends.

See the way our shadows come together
Softer than your fingers on my skin
Someday these may be all we remember of each other
Please don't tell me how the story ends.

Never's just the echo of forever
Lonesome as a love that might have been.
Let me go on lovin' and believin' 'til it's over
Please don't tell me how the story ends.

[Mend]

248. We grieve the loss of your beautiful wife. Our thoughts are with you and

your children.

[Pithlet]

249. I'm so sorry.

You have my deepest sympathy. I was pulling for you guys, and I'm so sad to hear this news. You and your family are in my thoughts.

[Nite Owl]

250. My deepest sympathies to

you and your boys. She will always live within you and them.

[Serial Mom]

251. My heartfelt sympathy

[canucksvt]

252. My deepest condolences...

OMC, I am so saddened by the loss of your wife. My prayers and hopes go out to you and your family in this time of need. Thank you for sharing this story with all of us. I hope your children can take with them the happy memories of their mother, and with you as their father, I can see that this will indeed happen. God bless you and your family.

[Th1onein]

253. I am so sorry for your loss, OMC.

I wish I could say something, anything, to comfort you, but I know that there is no comfort now. Please accept my sincere condolences.

[AnarchoFreeThinker]

254. God bless you and your family. Our thoughts and prayers are with you.

[bullwinkle428]

255. You have my most heartfelt condolences, OMC...

...can't imagine what it must be like for the kids right now. :cry:

[Kajsa]

256. OMC, I am so, so sorry.

Stacey will be in our hearts, also.
I felt like I knew her.
Through you, I did. :cry:

She and your family have touched more people
than you could imagine, from all over the world.

You are a great father, husband and person.
You and your sons are a family.

I'm sending love and peace to all of you.

PM me if you need anything, please.

:hug: :grouphug:

[Mnemosyne]

257. I am so sorry, OMC. So sorry. n/t

:hug:

[Whoa_Nelly]

258. Your loss is larger than any words I could give you

We are all here.
For you, for your boys, and for everything else you are going through and will go through. :hug:

[Tikki]

259. I'm so sorry.....

Tikki

[Burma Jones]

260. I wish you peace and strength

[July]

261. OMC, I am so very sorry.

You have made Stacey's beauty and strength real to all of us here who never had the opportunity to meet her, and we mourn with you.

I wish you solace and strength in this terribly painful time. I hope you and your sons will find comfort in each other.

My deepest condolences.

July

[supernova]

262. OMC, my deepest condolences to you and your sons

on the loss of your wife and their mother.

I know she was a very special person just from the way you talked about her. :-) :hug:

I can only hope to someday find someone who loves me as much as you so obviously and painfully love Stacey.

Oh, and you're still a family, you and the boys, just with one no longer physically present. But she will always be there and loving you still and wanting you to live life to the fullest, whatever that might mean in the future.


And we all love you here, you know.

:grouphug:

[OnyxCollie]

263. I'm so terribly sorry. nt

[tomfodw]

264. Baruch dayan ha-emet

My condolences. Someone I love is going through this right now. Accept help and support wherever you can find it.

[SacredCow]

265. Deepest sympathies for you and your family......

I'll be thinking of you today

[sundog]

266. sorry omc

thanks for being brave & sharing your story with us

stay strong

your family is in our thoughts

:pals:

[RedEarth]

267. OMC, I'm so sorry to hear that

[auntAgonist]

268. My deepest condolences OMC for you and the boys.

I'm so very sorry for your loss.


aA
:hug:

[SammyWinstonJack]

269. ...

:hug:

[AtomicKitten]

270. My heartfelt condolences on your loss.

[wovenpaint]

271. OMC, I'm so sorry

I feel blessed that you chose to share this journey with me. You've been a wonderful lesson for the power of love.
Even though I don't know you-your family has my heart.
I send prayers and vibes for strength and peace. You'll always have Stacey, and you'll be seeing see her through the eyes of your children.
I wish you all the best. :hug: :hug: :hug:

[Hugin]

272. OMC...

x(

Stacey is free and strong. She lives on in our hearts.

[myrna minx]

273. I am so sorry, OMC.

:hug:

[eyepaddle]

274. I am so sorry OMC,

and I am also amazed at your strength in this time of grief.

:hug:

[AlCzervik]

275. i'm so sorry.

:hug:

[mitchum]

276. I am so sorry for your loss, my brother

peace to you and all who love your beloved bride

[IndianaJones]

277. my condolences to you and your family. nt.

[BlueEyedSon]

278. Love and Peace be unto you.

[bluedog]

279. am so sorry for your loss n/t

[Blue_Roses]

280. I am so sorry for your loss

my deepest thoughts and prayers are with you and your two sons during this difficult time. Even though we are known only through a cyber board, I know I speak for many who indeed feel great sadness as if we had lost one of our own family members. She was too young. We will be keeping you close to our heart :hug:

[sarge43]

281. OMC, I realize that this would be the last thing on your mind right now.

But consider saving all these messages. I believe that in the future they'll mean a great deal to your sons, especially your posts. They'll see how deeply you loved their mother and how courageously you fought for her. And that thousands of people around the world came to love her, too.

Peace and comfort. Blessed be.

[musette_sf]

282. her love will always be with you

and yours with her.

[yardwork]

283. I'm very, very sorry.

[ehrnst]

284. Condolences and blessings on you and your family, OMC.

You are all in my thoughts.

[classof56]

285. I am so terribly saddened to hear this.

I lit a virtual candle for Stacy, as well as a real one here next to my computer. I know many, many other DUers did, as well. We share your grief and I am hoping you feel our love flowing through us to you. Your courage is an inspiration. Keep in touch with your DU family. We are here for you and your boys.

Blessings.

Class

[mcscajun]

286. My deepest condolences, OMC.

:cry: :hug: :cry: :hug: :cry:

She's beyond pain now, and she will live eternally young and beautiful in your heart, and in your memories.

[terip64]

287. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. n/t

[immoderate]

288. So sorry for your loss.

Take care.

--IMM

[G_Leo_Criley]

289. I am so sorry OMC -- May she rest in peace

[Justyce]

290. My deepest condolences to you and your family.

:cry:

[Arkham House]

291. God bless you and Stacey...

...and your two boys...I'm praying for you...

[porphyrian]

292. Take care of yourself and your kids. - n/t

[mikita]

293. Heartfelt Condolences to you and your family

There are no words. I'm so sorry.

Mikita

[catrose]

294. Blessings & comfort for you & the children

[eyesroll]

295. I'm sorry, OMC.

:hug:

[MissMillie]

296. OMC... I'm so sorry. I mean... sorry sorry sorry

I'm literally crying here. I know how hard she fought, and I know how hard you fought with her.

I don't have anything wise to say... and I know nothing I can say would begin to ease your heartache.

Please know that you're in my heart, my thoughts and my prayers... you and your boys.

[Highway61]

297. Been there OMC

Having lost my youngest daughter, I know what your going through. God Bless you and your children. You are in my prayers and remember Stacey is still with you.

[begin_within]

298. We'll continue to pray for you and her.

[OneBlueSky]

299. my deep condolences to you and the boys . . .

keep Stacey's memory dear to you heart, and she will always be with you . . . peace and love to you all . . .

michael
OneBlueSky

[FourScore]

300. I am so sorry OMC.

It isn't fair that she be taken from you and the boys so early in life. My prayers go out to the three of you and all of her loved ones. She sounds like a person with whom I would have loved to have shared a close friendship. I believe she is in a good place now, and I am certain that we will all be re-united with our loved ones again.

Someone said somthing beautiful to me once. I'd like to share it with you: Life, as a whole, is like a beautiful tapestry, and are each like a thread. Because of our myopic view, we cannot always see the picture being created, or why a thread was cut down so soon. That is where faith comes in. Just hold in your heart that she has fulfilled her life and left you with two beautiful boys. Do not try to make sense of it now, or to see the big picture because that is impossible. Just go through the motions and love your boys. Time will heal all wounds.

Thank you so much for letting us into your lives. We are all richer because of it.

[rockyandmax]

301. I'm sorry OMC.

I don't spend all that much time here, but I had been following this. I'm just shocked and have no words to express how I feel right now.

[1gobluedem]

302. So very, very sorry

It's so inadequate but that's all I can say. My heart bleeds for you and your boys.

[Lefta Dissenter]

OMC,

I am just so incredibly sorry. She was a gift to your life, to the lives of your boys, and you shared that gift with us. There are so many broken hearts now - she reached out and touched thousands of people through you and your writing.

Please let people help you. Let friends and family do whatever they can, and you just focus on yourself and your boys. And we are always here for you, providing a shoulder to cry on, someone to be angry with, and someone with whom to celebrate what she offered to the world through her life.

I just can't tell you how much I wish I could hug you and your kids right now, but for now, :hug: will have to do.

[mwdem]

303. I'm so sorry.

:hug:

[wicket]

304. Thoughts & prayers for you all

I am so sorry.

:hug:

[TwilightGardener]

305. Very, very sorry, OMC. My thoughts are with you and your family.

[stuntcat]

306. :hug:

I've been reading the updates without joining in, but making quiet wishes hoping you'd have some good news soon. And I am so sorry now.
Please don't say "we are no longer a family". I mean I'm sure you know without du'ers telling you but you're family still Is. And your sons will need you so much and you'll need them.
The next few days will seem impossible but try to focus on all the great things about her, how kind and happy and funny she's been. :hug:

[npincus]

307. I am so sorry, my deepest condolences

[likesmountains 52]

308. Thank you for sharing her with us...I'm so sorry OMC

[Bennyboy]

309. I am so sorry OMC.....

She really sounded like someone special. So very sorry for your loss.

[renie408]

310. I am so sorry. n/t

[oregonjen]

311. I'm so sorry for your loss

:grouphug:

[northamericancitizen]

312. Sending love and prayers to you and your sons.

[Commie Pinko Dirtbag]

313. I want to say something that would make you feel better, but I have no words. I'm so sorry. -nt

[judaspriestess]

314. my sincerest condolences to you and your family

[ourbluenation]

315. she's still with you and always will be brother. peace be upon you. peace to you.

:hug:

[The Traveler]

316. "Though lovers be lost love shall not

and death shall have no dominion."

Cry hard, then stand. Many distant minds hold you close now ... if nothing else, we have eyes with which to read and ears with which to listen.

[barb162]

317. Hon, I am so sorry for you and the kids.

I was so hoping she would pull through.
God bless you, Stacey and the kids.

[jackster]

318. OMC we mourn with you

and hold you in our heart of hearts

go in peace Stacey

may the life you led and the good you did here on earth live on through your children, husband, family and friends

[Greybnk48]

319. I'm so, so sorry OMC

for you and your little boys.

[Sweet Freedom]

320. How can we help you?

I'm sure everyone here agrees that virtual hugs and condolences just aren't enough. Stacey touched us all (and look how she brought so many people together!). I think we all have our own feelings of helplessness and would like to do something substantial.

When you are ready, please let us know how we can help you, whether it is financially, emotionally, spiritually -- we are here for you. Do not hesitate to ask.

We love you and your family. :hug:

Peace to Stacey. Your children couldn't ask for a better guardian angel.

[Horse with no Name]

321. It's amazing how this horrible disease can be the great equalizer

it transcends politics, ideology, and personal feelings.
I am so truly sorry for your loss OMC. I know how you are feeling right now and I wish there was something profound that I could say to make the hurt go away. Hugs and prayers for healing for you and your boys.

[ceile]

322. So sorry for your loss.

:hug:

[huskerlaw]

323. I'm so sorry.

My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family, OMC.

:hug:

[xiamiam]

324. My deepest condolences...please be very kind to yourself..and know that

while Stacy is not on this physical planet any longer, she will always be near you..in the rustle of the wind, in your childrens laughter, in a glimpse out of the corner of your eye, always...grief is a natural process, a friend once told me, allow it and in time it will pass...I think only those who love deeply can understand the grief which seems unbearable...I am sad for your loss and have read all of your emails...and prayed and sent protective energy to you and your family...I will light a candle now for Stacy and pray for her safe journey and for you and your children during this very difficult time.....Bless each of you...

[133724]

325. I have been where you are now...

In 1984 I lost my wife to problems related to Diabetes.

It hurt, I didn't know what I was going to do; I worried that I might loose my home; I was worried I would loose my business.

She had to quit her job a few years before because she was physically unfit ( she worked as a jailer in the Juvenile court and was not able to physically control the detainees. I along with 20,000 others were laid off in '82. We had just purchased a small dry cleaners in order to make ends meet.

I lost my wife, my best friend, and my business partner. I didn't know how I was going to survive.

But I did. And you will too.

Grieve now while you can do not try and loose your self in your work it will come back to haunt you.

Try not to make any major changes for at least 6 month (e.g. sell your home; move to a town; change your job).

Believe me it does get better, she will always be a part of who you are and you will always remember her and you love for her.

You will survive, things will get better.

Go in Peace...

[StrongBad]

326. Your courage is inspiring

Many prayers of strength are going out to you and your children. You WILL get through this and your kids are going to think of you as the most amazing father when they look back on how you got them through all of this.

I am so sorry for your loss. Your heart will heal but certainly take all the time you need to grieve and recoup.


Be well man.

[Mz Pip]

327. I am so sorry

We were all hoping and praying for a miracle. :cry:

My deepest sympathy to you and your family. Cherish your memories.

Mz Pip
:dem:

[NMDemDist2]

328. I'm so sorry OMC

there's not much else to say except I was very very sorry to hear of your loss.

[Vilis Veritas]

329. Peace be with you.

No Fear.

[dembotoz]

330. take care, be strong for your kids

I have been there, done that.
My wife died 21 years ago.
if you ever need to vent
pm me

[cobalt1999]

331. That is tragic news

I have no doubt you'll be strong enough to get through this.

[Shakespeare]

332. OMC, I am so very, very sorry.

We love you, and we are grieving with you.

[Ryano42]

333. ...

:hug:

[devilgrrl]

334. I am so sorry OMC

:hug:

[Beausoir]

335. How incredibly sad. My family has been thinking of you all. I am so sorry.

[Dangerously Amused]

336. My heart goes out to you and your family.

I have been following Stacey and your progress, and meditating for strength, peace and hope for all of you. I will continue to do so.


Take care.

[CBHagman]

337. I am so sorry.

God rest her soul, and may you and your friends and family -- and the many staffers who helped your precious wife -- be comforted.

[Mabus]

338. My heart goes out to you OMC

I just don't know what else to say except my heart breaks for you and yours.

:hug:

[Shine]

339. Peace and Comfort be with you and your family in your time of loss, OMC

Remember, my friend: True Love NEVER "dies".

Stacey's love will continue to grace you and your children forever.

May you and your sweet family be held in the Light during this most difficult time.

My thoughts and prayers are with you all.

:hug:

[A-Long-Little-Doggie]

340. I am so sorry for your loss

Stacey sounds like a truly beautiful person. She will give you and your kids the strength to carry on.

[SlowDownFast]

341. True love will never fade...

True love will never fade
True love will never fade
True love will never fade
True love will never fade
True love will never fade

I wonder if there's no forever
No walking hand in hand
Down a yellow brick road
To never never land
These days I get to where I'm going
Make it there eventually
Follow the trail of breadcrumbs
To where I'm meant to be
To where I'm meant to be

I don't know what brought you to me
That was up to you
There's so many come to see me
Who want their own tattoo
I fixed a needle in a holder
Laid my hand upon your spine
And there upon your shoulder
I drew the picture as your sign
When I think about us
I see the picture that we made
The picture to remind us

True love will never fade
True love will never fade
True love will never fade
True love will never fade

I worked the rowdies and daytrippers
Now and then I think of you
Any which way we're all shufflin'
Forward in the queue
They like to move my operation
They like to get me off the pier
And I dream I'm on a steamer
Pullin' out of here

When I think about us
I see a picture that we made
The picture to remind us

True love will never fade
True love will never fade
True love will never fade
True love will never fade

-Mark Knopfler

[malta blue]

342. OMC - I have no words to express how deeply saddened I

am by this news. My heart goes out to you and your family.

Please take care of yourself and your children.

:hug: :hug: :cry: :hug: :hug:

[Robson]

343. Words are inadequate to express my sympathy

That was beautifully written. Please remember that you and your family will be foremost in our thoughts.

[Irishonly]

344. I Am So Sorry

Although the world is a little dimmer, the sky shines a little brighter now with Stacey's light. I am holding you and your children close to my heart and prayers. Stacey lives in everyone who loved her and everyone who was blessed to know her.

If there is anything I can do, please let me know.

Stacey is at peace now. I pray you find peace.

[alfredo]

345. So sad My heart hurts for you and your family.

[karmaqueen]

346. I am so very sorry, may you find peace...nt

[onenote]

347. You and your family are in my heart.

[snacker]

348. Please know that you and your family will remain in our thoughts and prayers.

What a special person your Stacey was...the way she touched so many people including those of us who were never blessed to have known her. Peace to all of you.

[ljm2002]

349. Love and tears here, OMC

You and Stacy have touched so many people. She is at peace now, and it is for you to be strong. Remember you still have the great gifts she has given you -- her love, your time together, and your precious sons. I will pray for all of you, this is awfully hard.

[applegrove]

350. I'm so sorry.

[Metta]

351. My sincere sympathies, OMC. My heart goes out to you and your boys.

I ask for unfettered circumstances to grieve and clear and clarity of mind in what you do to align now to new circumstances. Your wife is in the light now, free from bodily and mental constraints. She goes to a good reward, I'm sure.

I ask your guardian angels to work closely with you and your family as you procede from here.

[6000eliot]

352. I'm so sorry for your loss,

and I wish you and your boys the strength to face this trial.

[Dora]

353. I am so sorry.

[Botany]

354. The more you loved someone the more it will hurt when they go.

The Beatles - Golden Slumbers

Once there was a way to get back homeward
Once there was a way to get back home
Sleep pretty darling do not cry
And I will sing a lullabye

Golden slumbers fill your eyes
Smiles awake you when you rise
Sleep pretty darling do not cry
And I will sing a lullabye

Once there was a way to get back homeward
Once there was a way to get back home
Sleep pretty darling do not cry
And I will sing a lullabye

[Beelzebud]

OMC, you and I don't always see eye to eye, but I'm terribly sorry for your loss..

I'm sorry, man.

We've had some heated exchanges, but I want you to know it's never personal.

I'm so sorry.. Words are inadequate in times like this, so I'll just leave it at that...

You and yours will be in my thoughts.

[japple]

Dearest OMC, may the angels hold you aloft in the days

ahead. Let your family and friends help you as much as possible. Hold your sons and comfort them. You will make it. Your beautiful Stacey's spirit will be with you forever. Peace and love to you and your family.

[Mad_Dem_X]

355. My sincere condolences for you and your boys. n/t

[kma3346]

356. My deepest sympathy

You've touched so many people here with your devotion to your beautiful and loving wife. May God bless and help you and your sons get through this as best as you can. You have many, many people who care about you.

[peace13]

357. Peace and love to you and your boys.

Good thoughts and energy are sent your way to help you through this difficult time. Peace and love, Kim

[Hosnon]

358. I'm so sorry OMC...my condolences to you and your children.

She obviously had a husband that thought the world of her.

:hug:

[rhiannon55]

359. Blessings to you and your sweet little boys

May Stacey's beautiful spirit guide and keep you. I am so sorry for your tremendous loss. :hug:

[Feron]

360. I'm so sorry to hear that.

My condolences to you and your family. :(

[deadparrot]

361. I'm so sorry.

All the best to you and yours.

[ChavezSpeakstheTruth]

362. My deepest prayers go out to you and your family

:hug:

[loudsue]

363. What a testimony to a great life.

:cry: I am so so so sorry, OMC. O8) She surely was an angel, and we'll continue to send prayers for you and your family.

[Debi]

364. My heart goes out to you and your family OMC

I think of you and I think of Love :hug:

[Oilwellian]

365. There are no words OMC

I lost a son many years ago and know of the heart-wrenching pain you're suffering right now. Words have little meaning at this point and only time will help heal the deep wound you're now feeling. Have faith in that and keep your heart open to those 2 precious little boys...they need you more now than ever before, and you will need them. It is they who will help you through this most difficult time. I'm so very, very sorry. :hug:

[displacedtexan]

366. So terribly sorry.

Please let us know if we can do anything for you and your children.

I just donated to the Susan G. Komen Foundation.

Here's the link for
those who can donate.

[Dastard Stepchild]

367. I am very sorry.

I hope for healing and peace for you and your family.

I have a husband that I am going to hug for an extra long period of time tonight. We're not at all far in age from you and your wife and your experience has really opened my eyes these past weeks. I suppose we feel so indestructible now in our 30s, but there is just no guarantee in life that things will go as planned.

Again, I am very sorry for your loss.

[LaraMN]

368. Much love to you and your little ones.

Your children are fortunate that in their loss, they have such a wonderful father to lean on.
My deepest condolences.

:hug:

[grace0418]

369. This is for Stacey:

She Goes On - Crowded House

Pretty soon youll be able to remember her
Lying in the garden singing
Right where she'll always be
The door is always open

This is the place that I loved her
And these are the friends that she had
Long may the mountain ring
To the sound of her laughter
And she goes on and on

In her soft wind I will whisper
In her warm sun I will glisten
till we see her once again
In a world without end

We owe it all to frank sinatra
The song was playing a she walked into the room
After the long weekend
They were a lifetime together

Appearing in the eyes of children
In the clear blue mountain view
The colouring in the sky
And painting ladders to heaven
And she goes on

In her soft wind I will whisper
In her warm sun I will glisten
till we see her once again
In a world without end

In her soft wind I will whisper
In her warm sun I will glisten
And I always will remember
In a world without end
She goes on
She goes on
She goes on

[MrCoffee]

370. peace and comfort to you and yours, OMC

[mike_c]

371. oh my friend, I'm so terribly sorry for your loss....

There are no words to express how sorry I am. Be strong, my friend. You'll get through this. :hug:

[Claire Beth]

372. I am so sorry to hear this!

[spoony]

373. Bless your family

From reading all of your posts during this ordeal, I and I'm sure many have come to feel close to you, and I know we all dreaded the possibility of loggin on one day and reading this heartbreaking update. You and your family will stay in my thoughts and prayers. And even if you and your wife are separated for years and years to come, even 100 years, it will ultimately seem like a drop in the bucket compared to the eternity you'll share.

[Swede]

374. You have my condolences OMC.

My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

[SallyMander]

375. So, so sorry OMC

Many of us here are thinking of you and your boys, and wishing there was something we could do...

[liberalhistorian]

376. Oh, no, I'm so sorry; there really are

no other words for a time like this. She will always be with you and your boys and the love and care you have for her will never end. And you are right, she really is at eternal peace now, as hard as that may be to deal with in THIS world.

Do you have family and friends nearby to help with everything, including babysitting?

Are there any DUers nearby who could come and help out? Maybe those of you who live in his area could get together and help him and the children out.

[calimary]

377. I'm so sorry, OMC. Damn.

Words fail (clearly they have never failed YOU, though - such beautiful, heart-felt eloquence! Stacey would be proud of you at this moment).

I'm so sorry. If it helps ('cause this feels like when my mom died last November), just put the blinders on and slog through the next few weeks on auto-pilot. One day at a time. One foot in front of the other. You'll be in a blur. That's okay. Just let it be. Let other people help you - this is one of those times when they'll be very eager to. Let them take some of the burdens of the things you have to take care of now. That's how it's supposed to be. Let your friends buoy you up. We will, here, too.

:hug: :grouphug: :hug:

By the way, that last sentence is really important. I posted about my mom's passing and the OUTPOURING of love and support and sympathy from here was STAGGERING!!! I kept that thread to read again and again, and it was SO comforting and loving. You may want to do that, too. 'Cause there's a LOT of love expressed for you here.

[DeposeTheBoyKing]

378. I am so very sorry

Stacey is at peace now, and she is waiting for you and watching over you. :hug: :cry: :grouphug: O8)

[WildEyedLiberal]

379. Oh my God, no. I'm so sorry OMC

I've been thinking about Stacey ever since you made your first post. This breaks my heart. No words can possibly salve your pain, but I hope the knowledge that someday you will see Stacey again brings you some comfort.

:hug: :hug: :hug:

[Momgonepostal]

380. I'm so sorry for your loss...

Wow, saying that seems inadequate.

:hug: :cry:

[redqueen]

381. I'm so sorry...

:pals:

[SmokingJacket]

382. I have no words...

She will live with you, and in your children, forever.

Take care of yourself.

[Wapsie B]

383. I am so sorry for your loss.

My deepest sympathies to you and your family.

[tandot]

384. Our deepest sympathy and condolences, OMC

May beautiful memories give you strength at this difficult time.

[RubyDuby in GA]

385. I am so sorry for your family's loss

My heart aches for you and your boys.

:cry:

[sufrommich]

386. I was afraid we would be reading this post soon...

My God, how incredibly sad for you OMC.My sincerest condolences.Prayers for you and your children.

[Summer93]

387. So sorry for your loss

I would like to send you a hug or many hugs. Your children will help you through this terrible time. They will see the joys that their mother saw. They will laugh along with her. They will ask the hard questions and you will help them through. All that your wife shared with you and your children will be there for you and your family now.

Rejoice that you knew her.

Hugs,
Martha
P.S. My husband died of cancer when he was 30 years old and our son was just 2 1/2 years old. My son is now the husband and father of two beautiful children to whom he always makes time to show his love.

[merci_me]

388. My most heartfelt condolences to you and your sons.

[lady lib]

389. God bless you, too.

I'm so very sorry for your loss.

[SharonRB]

390. I'm so sorry, OMC

My thoughts are with you and your boys.

:hug:

[Flaxbee]

391. Oh, OMC, I am so very, very sorry

I have been following Stacey's struggle these past few weeks and hoping and praying she would recover. I am just so incredibly sorry for your and your boys' loss.

You seem like a very strong person and a wonderfully caring father; please don't forget yourself in this sorrow and your work to be strong for your kids.

[gizmonic]

392. My heart is breaking...I don't know what to say

:cry:

:grouphug: :hug:

[ElizabethDC]

393. God bless you and your family, OMC

I'm so sorry for your loss. You and your family certainly continue to be in my prayers.

[LSK]

394. I am so sorry

:cry:

:hug:

[Maccagirl]

395. I can't imagine your pain

but if we can do anything to lessen your burden, please let us know. Your love for Stacey is/was an inspiration to us all. God bless you and your sons.

:cry:

[GoneOffShore]

396. I am so sorry.

This is very sad news. Know that you have friends here at DU who you can call on.

[Katina]

397. my deepest sympathy

wishing you strength and courage as you go through this painful time. The support & prayers you have received from DU is a tribute to the love you have for your Stacey. You were blessed to have shared in the glow of such a beautiful shooting star. May her glow stay with you always as she flies through the universe.

[guitar man]

398. So sorry to hear, condolonces

May the Great Spirit bless and keep you :hug:

[bunny planet]

399. You make me wish I could have known her.

I'm so sorry for your loss.

[Kali]

400. ah shit, I am so sorry

take care of yourself and let those boys help you as you take care of them.

[Cleita]

401. I'm so sorry.

:hug: Losing a loved one is never easy. Be strong for your children. They need you now more than ever and remember that Stacey lives on in them.

[HuskerDU]

402. No words to express...

:cry:

[redwitch]

403. I am so very sorry for the loss of your beloved Stacey.

It is my belief that her love and her energy live on and surround you and all those she loved. Hold on tight to those beautiful boys and know that the strength will come to get you through. Peace, my friend

[nam78_two]

404. ...

:hug:
Please take care of yourself and the OMC kids...Best wishes to you all. This is very sad.

[BarenakedLady]

405. I am so sorry for you loss OMC

May you find the strength you need for you and your boys in the coming days, weeks, months, and years.

:hug:

[otohara]

406. So Very Sorry

for your loss.

[Missy Vixen]

407. OMC, there are no words

I'm crying over someone I never met, but the world is poorer for her loss.

Please know our thoughts are with you and your sons.

Julie

[LiberalHeart]

408. Saying goodbye is the hardest thing we do....

I lost my guy in 1976. I still cannot get through a conversation about him without crying. I know what you are going through, and I also know your life will get easier eventually. It takes time, but it does happen. Please know that your story has touched hearts all across the country, perhaps all around the world. May the combined energy of all of us lift you up now. Much love to you, dear OMC.

[DemReadingDU]

409. I am so sorry

You must have such wonderful memories of Stacey. A very sad time for you and all the family.

[debbierlus]

410. My most sincere condolencses & all my light & love to you & your boys

I am so, so, sorry.

I am sure DU will pull together to help you in whatever way we can....Just ask. Love & light to you & your little ones. You have shown grace & courage in this beyond what anyone could expect. One day & moment at a time. Tomorrow will take care of itself....

Very sorry for your loss.

[bear425]

411. My sincerest condolences to you and your children.

I wish you strength and peace during this terrible time.

[Taverner]

412. I am so sorry for your loss

I have no idea what I would do if I lost Tavernerwife...

[Bake]

413. I'm so sorry for your loss, OMC!

You'll be in our thoughts and prayers.

Bake

[lost-in-nj]

414. Hugs and prayers

to you and your family......


lost

[Maestro]

415. I am so sorry for your loss OMC.

May a greater power grant you the peace and strength to work through this. :hug:

[allisonthegreat]

416. Very sorry for your loss, may peace be with you! n/t

[rasputin1952]

417. My sincerest condolences...my thoughts and prayers are with

you during this time of duress.

Remember the best of times, and may this burden be lifted from you with time and kindness of the memories of the time you've had together.

:hug:

[Maat]

418. I am so sorry for your loss; it is OUR loss too.

The World needed Stacey to be here. Rest in peace, Stacey; we will try to carry on our best without your loving spirit.

If there is anything I can do, please let me know.

Please post daily, and let us know how things are going. Cry, show us your anger, anything.

We are here for you.

:grouphug:

[Beaverhausen]

419. I'm so sorry OMC

:hug:

[Lugnut]

420. I'm so sorry OMC.

May she rest in peace. :(

[in_cog_ni_to]

421. I am so sorry, OMC.

:hug:

[TBreeze]

422. I am so very sorry

:hug:

[av8rdave]

423. I am so sorry for your loss...my thoughts and prayers are with you

[LeftishBrit]

424. I am so sorry!!!

There are really no words. My very best thoughts and wishes to you and your family.

[YOY]

425. I don't know you OMC...

But you're breaking my heart with those words. (No sarcasm there.)

:cry:

My deepest condolences.

[Bullwinkle925]

426. No words exist that can take away even a bit of your pain right now . . .

Strength will come to you from within - your boys will take comfort in your love.
You have expressed your love very eloquently - your heart will be healed with time.

[Marlie]

427. I'm so sorry

There's an old saying "The good die young". I guess God wanted her to be his angel.
You, Stacey and your boys will always be in my heart. I'm so sorry for your loss.

[Melissa G]

428. Love and Light to You and Yours

:grouphug:

[MorningGlow]

429. Weeping with you, OMC

You and your boys are in my thoughts and prayers. I'm so, so sorry. But she is in your heart, and now in all of ours as well. :cry: :hug:

[Bluerthanblue]

430. the only thing

i feel the need to say to you dear OMC, is that I hope you will know, that you haven't stopped being "a family"- and though I never had the opportunity to know your Stacey, she shines through in your sharing with us here. She will forever be a part of your family, she lives on in your boys, in your thoughts, and in your hearts. Nothing will ever change that.

Be gentle with yourself, and with your boys- please give yourself lots of room to be fully human. Nothing in the world is more important than taking care of yourself and your sons, as you move through the next days and weeks.

I wish you much- especially peace, and genuine comfort. I am so sorry that life has been so cruel to Stacey and to you, and to your sons.
know that
you are very loved,
blu

[Road Scholar]

431. I am truely sorry for your loss my friend.

[piedmont]

432. I'm sorry, OMC.

[IntravenousDemilo]

433. I'm so sorry for your loss, OMC. I know you'll get through this.

You obviously have great inner strength. I'm sure I could never be as eloquent as you've been, if I were in your shoes.

[stranger81]

434. No words, OMC . . . . peace be with you. [n/t]

[RestoreGore]

435. My deepest sympathies to you and your children

Be comforted now if you can in knowing that her spirit will never leave you. Bless you and your children. They will most definitely be your strength now.

[Kerrytravelers]

436. I am so sorry to learn of this. My heart goes out to you, OMC, and your kids.

Words on a message board don't do her justice. I am so very sorry.

:hug:

[Zookeeper]

437. I am so sorry, OMC....

Stacey sounded like a wonderful person. My heart goes out to you and your babies; it must be incredibly painful for all of you.

Thank you for taking the time to update us, as many, many of us were keeping you in our thoughts and prayers.

My deepest condolences and wishes for peace and healing to you and your children.

:hug: :hug: :hug:

[Stinky The Clown]

438. Words are so inadequate

The very prime of life .........

[Writer]

439. Oh OMC I am so sorry...

I am tearing up over here. I am so, so sorry.

If I were there I'd offer you the longest hug. The tightest hug.

I am so, so sorry...

~Writer~

[shaniqua6392]

440. I am so sorry!

Let us know if we can do anything for you here at DU. You are in my thoughts and prayers. You will be with her again in heaven.

[juajen]

441. I'm so sorry I didn't know this special person.

She really seems to have been incredible. God Bless You and your dear children.

[mod mom]

442. I am truly so sorry. Peace to your family.

[AlecBGreen]

443. stay strong OMC

she is in a better place, free from suffering. Ill be praying for you and your family. :hug:

[blondeatlast]

444. I'm so very, very sorry, OMC. We've grown to love you all and truly feel the loss.

May she be at peace in God's loving embrace.

Amen.

[bigwillq]

445. I am very sorry for your loss.

I don't have many words to offer you at this time only to offer my most sincere condolences to you and your family, especially the boys. You and your family are in my thoughts. Take care. :hug: :cry:

[Kingshakabobo]

446. OMC, I'm so very sorry to hear that

:cry:

[roguevalley]

447. This is so very sad. She's a lovely soul. I lost my mom in May

and my dad the July before. Ten months apart, losing the dearest best people that ever were. You don't think you can make it. You do, however. You can't imagine it and there are oceans of tears but you make it. You can also know they are standing next to you. When the siren in your head lessens a little, you will notice it. There are infinite signs of it if you are looking. I hope you do, honey. She will stay next to your side every day of the rest of your life and that of your boys. She will be there through every low moment and every triumph. She will let you know in myriad ways that she hears you and sends you back even more love than she could manage in life. She is merely changed in form, not gone away forever. She hears and sees you and stands by you. She only wants your happiness because that is what love seeks. You will never be alone now, not for the days of your life to come. Just listen and you will see and hear her.

She heard every word you said, saw and felt every gesture. As this all happened, the loved ones of your life and hers, those that have already gone on ahead were surrounding both of you. They were loving you and yours, offering you protection and support, even though you couldn't see them. At no point will she ever be turned away from you and your boys. She is the gentle breeze you feel when you are so tired you can't move on. Trust me.

Rose Kennedy said, "After the rain, the birds sing." I hope for you all that is good and decent and loving. I wish for you peace and hope. It will come. My parents were my life. The void you speak of, I know intimately. But in the darkness, she will be your light. Find it and focus on it and follow it. She will help you even now. She will never leave.

Take care and know you and yours are loved. I wish I could say more but you will find out for yourself. Its the long journey all of us will take, learning to live again, and she will never let you go on it alone.

Love and hope,

RV

[Arugula Latte]

448. I'm so sorry.

May you all find peace.

:grouphug:

[SoCalDemGrrl]

449. Very, very sad. May God hold you and your boys in the palm of his hand.

[dancing kali]

450. I am so sorry for your loss, OMC

Your love and devotion to Stacey showed in every word you wrote from the first time I saw the post about her being diagnosed with the cancer. Both of you fought so hard. The world is a little darker today. My deepest condolences to you and your boys.

Dancing Kali

[Avalux]

451. I am so very sorry for your loss.

I can't begin to imagine what you are going through right now. Although it may be difficult, please remember to take care of yourself so you can take care of your beautiful children. Your family is in my thoughts and prayers. :hug:

[Critters2]

452. I'm so sorry, OMC. But I give thanks that a great soul like Stacey

touched your life, and gave you two beautiful children. I cried as soon as I saw your post, and will pray that you find comfort strength to deal with the challenges ahead.

Only 34....I'm just so sorry, OMC. So sorry. :hug:

[John Gauger]

453. There are no words.

[intheflow]

454. I'm so sorry to hear that, OMC.

:cry: I haven't been posting in these threads, but I've been keeping you and Stacy and your family in my prayers and thoughts. Made a special donation to breast cancer research in Stacey's honor. My deepest condolences to you. Stacey was so blessed to have someone love her as much as you do. May you find some peace in knowing that she has been released from her physical suffering. May you find comfort in knowing we will continue to keep you in our hearts as you struggle with your loss. :hug:

[mulsh]

455. condolences

n/t

[hlthe2b]

456. OMC... I don't know if you'll read these any time soon....

or if you will do more than skim them. But, if you do, I'd like to convey, not only my profound sympathies, but the lessons learned from the loss of my father several years ago.

My father died after a three month "roller coaster" course (hell) in ICU that begain hours after a major surgery to preempt the development of posssible esophageal cancer. Ironically, he was admitted just a few days after my mother died, but his struggle for three months (despite the worst and most painful of sequelae) is both a testament to his fight to live and his dedication to both my sister and myself. He did not give up, despite his grief. But the point I would like to convey is this. To the extent I could find peace in this horror, it stemmed from my conveying to my father (who had been largely in and out of consciousness for weeks) that "it was ok to go and that I and my sister would be ok." Within seconds of my saying this to him, he arrested and died.

You see, my father gave me and my sister the great gift of his fight to survive---for US. In return, I was able to give the only gift I had for my father-- to let him go. Even a decade later, I tear up thinking of what I've lost, as will you. But, I have peace. It sounds like you were able to let Stacey go as well and release her from her painful struggle to survive, when the time came. I hope that does bring you peace.

Be kind to yourself. Share your lessons learned with others. THAT is a tribute to Stacey.

[Surya Gayatri]

457. With you in spirit, OMC...

Blessings on you and your young sons in this time of extreme trial. Take comfort knowing that Stacey suffers no more. SG

[bonito]

458. ..

:grouphug: Peace to your family brother.

[Ellipsis]

459. I am so sorry for your loss.

She is with always in your kids.

[me b zola]

460. Heartfelt condolences to you and your family, OMC

:grouphug:

[NewWaveChick1981]

461. I am so incredibly sorry, OMC.

:hug: :cry: :pals: My heart goes out to you and to your kids. :hug: Stacey fought the good fight. My deepest sympathies to you. :hug:

[Kurovski]

462. Condolences to you and your family.

[DeepModem Mom]

463. My prayers...

remain with you and your children. The Stacey you describe has inspired us all -- and so have you.

[lastliberalintexas]

464. I am very sorry for your loss

I hope you and your children can find some semblance of peace and comfort in the coming months.

[Throd]

465. prayers for you and the family

[JVS]

466. My condolences to you

[hedgehog]

467. Rest now and gather your strength. Don't be hasty, give yourself time.

We're all grieving with you.

[Patsy Stone]

468. My deepest sympathies

and all of my love to you and the family.

I'm so sorry.

[blues90]

469. I am very sorry to hear of your loss .

[Bob3]

470. I'm so very sorry to hear about your loss

Prayers to you and yours - she will always be in your heart.
again I'm so sorry to hear this.

[SaveOurDemocracy]

471. OMC ... I am so very sorry for your tragic loss.

My heart aches for you ... there are no words.

[bigtree]

472. so sorry OMC

wonderful tribute

[Broken_Hero]

473. I'm sorry to hear of your loss OMC,

may you, and your family stay strong during these rough, times....

[LongTomH]

474. Good Lord be with you and comfort you!

I lost someone I loved deeply too! You have my deepest and sincere condolences.

[TommyPaine]

475. My deepest condolences.

Your story really touched me - I don't know what else to say.

[JeffR]

476. Deepest sympathies, OMC

I'm so sorry for your terrible loss.

[libnnc]

477. I am so sorry OMC

Just so terribly sorry. There's probably more that I could say (from experience) but those words won't help you right now.

Just know that there are people here who are thinking about you and your family and who wish you much love and continued strength.

I will give some practical advice from my own experience; you need to sleep. If you can't, get something to help you sleep--no crime in that right now. You're more exhausted than you realize. Not just physically but emotionally and mentally wiped out.

We love you (even if we haven't always agreed)
:hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:

[AZ Criminal JD]

478. Prayers are with you OMC n/t

[knitter4democracy]

479. Damn. How many do we have to lose this year?

DUers, friends, loved ones. Hubby and I lost one of our best college friends last spring--35 and dropped dead of a heart attack at work. Left behind an amazing wife and two babies--not quite 3 and 5 months. Makes me hurt just to think of it.

Too many dying young. Too much pain. :cry: Too damn hard this life sometimes.

I'm so very, very sorry OMC. I'd send over an extra pot pie for the freezer when you don't feel like cooking if I could. :(

[MagickMuffin]

480. OMC, I'm so sorry for your loss

I have been keeping up with your threads and the other ones in Stacey's honor even though I didn't post on any of them I still was thinking of Stacey, you and your children. I sent her as much healing light as I could muster in hopes she would get better and she did for awhile. Unfortunately it wasn't enough to keep her earthbound.

I know how your heart aches and it will for some time to come because of the love you had for her. But she will always be with you and your boys. Keep her memory alive for the boys so they will always remember their mother.

Take care of yourself and your boys and know that the DU community is here for you.

[AmBlue]

481. So, so sorry....

May you find comfort in your beautiful memories of her and the love your many friends and family. God bless you and those precious boys.

:hug:

[Tripper11]

482. Peace OMC - to you and your family. n/t

[taught_me_patience]

483. I'm sorry to hear this news

I was hoping it wouldn't come true. My condolences to you and your family.

fight on.

[tblue37]

484. OMC, I am so sorry for your loss. Few people find such a love in their

lives. I am glad you did, though loving so deeply makes the loss greater.

I hope the edges wear off the pain soon.

[Redstone]

485. Go take care of those boys, and of yourself.

Redstone

[goclark]

486. Sorrow fills my heart

Prayers for you and your family.

[BattyDem]

487. I'm so sorry, OMC

There are no words. My heart is breaking for you. :cry:

My deepest condolences to you and your family. :hug:

[Irishonly]

488. I Was Thinking About Your Sons

I remembered the Rugrats episode, "The Bestest Mom". I found the poem Chuckie's mom left him.

My Sweet Little Chuckie ~ Though I must leave you behind me, This poem will tell you where you always can find me. When a gentle wind blows, that's my hand on your face. And when the tree gives you shade, that's my sheltering embrace. When the sun gives you freckles, that's me tickling my boy. When the rain wets your hair, those are my tears of joy. When the long grass enfolds you, that's me holding you tight. When the Whippoorwill sings, that's me whispering, "Night,night".

I don't know if it helps but I have always thought the words were so wise and children would understand.

[Raejeanowl]

489. It's So Sad to Hear This

I won't suggest you not grieve and cope with this in any way that feels right to you, but please come to know for your comfort that she isn't all that far away and never will be truly lost to you. Her blood runs through your children's veins, her spirit inhabits your heart and soul, memories of your life together will always be yours to treasure, and still...something more of her light and love remains near and will rejoin you entirely someday.

Your ordeal has been in our minds and hearts and we'll continue to remember and pray.

[Rising Phoenix]

490. my deepest sympathies

anything I can do....anything... please let me know!
:hug:

[CraftyGal]

491. TrogL and I send our condolences.

:grouphug: :cry:

Crafty

[undergroundrailroad]

492. My deepest condolences to you and your family.

O8)

[Zavulon]

493. I don't even know what to say, OMC.

I mean, it goes without saying that you've got my deepest condolences and that you & yours are foremost in my thoughts - I just wish I had something more helpful and useful to say. I'm pretty sure you know what I mean, but I wish I had better words anyway.

[librechik]

494. blessings

:loveya:

[Jackpine Radical]

495. I'm so terribly sorry.

Please know that she and you are in the hearts of more people than you can know.

[otherlander]

496. OMC, I was hoping so much that this wouldn't happen,

that somehow things would turn around, and I'm so sorry it ended up like this. I can't even begin to imagine how terrible this must be for you and your sons. :hug:
:cry:

[sonias]

497. I am so sorry for your loss

May Stacey rest in peace. A heartbreaking a story of someone so young. I can't find the words to comfort you. I think the best thing you can give yourself is the time to grieve. Be thankful that you were with her until the end. That lasting gift of being with her will always be with you both. Your children will love you for that always.

Take care.:cry::grouphug:

Sonia

[GoddessOfGuinness]

498. I'm so sorry, OMC...

The loss of your dear companion reminds me of this poem by Emily Dickinson:

To see the Summer Sky
Is Poetry, though never in a Book it lie --
True Poems flee --


I wish I could give you a real hug...This seems so inadequate. :hug:

[Sparkly]

499. My deepest sympathies, OMC.

Your words are so beautiful; she sounds like a very special person indeed. I'm so sorry to hear of your loss. It sounds like you know how difficult it will be, how strong you want to (and can!) be, and how much your children need you.

I hope you take the time you need, find the support you need and find peace and solace in her spirit. :hug:

[Lone_Star_Dem]

500. I'm deeply sorry for your loss

There are no words great enough to console you and the rest of those who loved her.

May you and your boys find peace, and in time be able to reflect on only the goodness and beauty that Stacey brought into your lives.

:grouphug:

[trumad]

501. I'm so sorry for your loss....

take care and God Bless.

[CabalPowered]

502. Sincerest condolences to you and your family

You will always have support here OMC and never once hesitate to call on us. Take care, there's a brighter day ahead.

[In_The_Wind]

503. I'm sorry for your loss, OPERATIONMINDCRIME.

:grouphug:

[WyLoochka]

504. My deepest condolences, OMC

My heart is aching so much for you.

[toddaa]

505. I wish peace for you and your family, OMC

[Loki]

506. I am so sorry.

OMC, the loss to you and your children is beyond my poor words. Many years ago, I read a passage of a letter from a husband to his wife right before a battle in which he knew he would not return from. It expressed in such beautiful, simple prose the love we have for each other is a power that death can't conquer. May I leave these words for you:

"But, O Sarah! If the dead can come back to this earth and flit unseen around those they loved, I shall always be near you; in the garish day and in the darkest night -- amidst your happiest scenes and gloomiest hours - always, always; and if there be a soft breeze upon your cheek, it shall be my breath; or the cool air fans your throbbing temple, it shall be my spirit passing by.

Sarah, do not mourn me dead; think I am gone and wait for thee, for we shall meet again. "

In the hard days ahead, may you find peace and comfort.


Lee

[AZBlue]

507. I'm SO sorry!

:hug:

:cry: :cry: :cry:

[AZBlue]

508. I'm SO sorry!

:hug:

:cry: :cry: :cry:

[Dyedinthewoolliberal]

509. My thoughts are with you

in this time of loss and sorrow. :cry:

[KansDem]

510. My deepest condolences...

[retread]

511. Sorry for your loss. Bless you and your little ones.

[mnhtnbb]

512. I am so sorry OMC. May you find strength in all your wonderful memories.

[Kool Kitty]

513. I am so sorry.

[iconoclastic cat]

514. My condolences, OMC. nt

[Cabcere]

515. OMC, I am so sorry.

:cry: :hug: :grouphug: :hug: :cry:

Rest in peace, Stacey.

[DFW]

516. I can almost imagine what you are going through--almost

I was going nuts when my wife got breast cancer.
We were lucky--she came through it (so far).

My heart breaks every time some man who loves his
woman is not as lucky as I was (we were). I came close
to being where you are, and hope you can muster more
strength than I think I would have been able to.

It sounds like you will. Bets of luck, and may her
memory sustain you for the time you need to heal, even if
that's forever.

[The Wielding Truth]

517. My heart breaks for your loss.

Stacey's existence was a blessing.

[deepthought42]

518. So Sorry to hear...

:hug: :cry:

I am hopeful you will be ok and your children are lucky to have you. :hug:

[Counciltucky]

519. My condolences.

That was as touching of a remembrance as I've ever read. I'm so sorry for your loss. Hopefully the spirit of your wife will live on through you and your kids.

[JuniperLea]

520. I'm so very sorry for your loss, OMC

I wish you peace.

[TygrBright]

521. I'm holding you in the Light, OMC. I can't say anything that will ease such pain...

...but as long as Stacey lives in the memories of those who know and love her, she will continue to give that unique specialness.

What you are going through now is my deepest fear, my most haunting nightmare. May you find the strength needed to live on and transform your anguish into the bittersweet joy of remembrance and gratitude.

lovingly,
Bright

[TK421]

522. You will be in my thoughts...I'm terribly sorry for your loss

as time goes by, it will get easier :hug:

[Bitwit1234]

523. I feel your lost. My sister passed 2 years ago with

metastasized liver cancer from breast cancer. Her husband still emails me weekly and he misses her as we all do. I know you will.. Bless you and your family.

[poverlay]

524. It's not just you. The world really is darker today. Your pain is our shadow. n/t

[QMPMom]

525. I am so sorry for your loss.

I will keep you and your children in my thoughts and prayers.

[proud patriot]

526. I'm sending you Strength my Friend

I'm real sorry to hear this

[lonestarnot]

527. I am so sorry OMC. Please take care of yourself so that you can

take care of your boys. Stacy would want you to. Peace OMC. :hug:

[Bzzzz]

528. My Condolences, OMC...

May Stacey RIP

[Mike03]

529. Sorry beyond words for your loss

The love you two shared sounds so strong that I doubt it can be destroyed by separation.

Grief is hard work, be gentle to yourself.

[Ken Burch]

530. How huge your pain must be at this moment. How empty you must feel

I know what it is to lose a life partner.

Take the time you need to heal from this. Let you friends and family help keep you going in this time. And remember, as the last words of Desiderata remind us "with all its shams, drudgeries, and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world".

Be well, my friend. Know she is at peace and her suffering has ended. Know that someday yours will end as well.

[ProudDad]

531. I'm very sorry for your loss

You have our support...

You will make it through this...

[mentalsolstice]

532. May you find strength in your memories of Stacey! eom

[Lost-in-FL]

533. OMG, OMG... I am so saddened...

:cry: :cry:

My biggest condolences to you and your family.

[Niccolo_Macchiavelli]

534. strength to you OMC

may she rest in peace

my condolences to you and your boys

i wish for you to find joy again. i know it's out of reach at this time though.

[RetroLounge]

535. My deepest condolensces...

:hug:

RL

[ulysses]

536. so, so sorry.

Peace.

[CrownPrinceBandar]

537. Sorry for your loss OMC...........

I wish you and your family well.

[Geek_Girl]

538. My deepest condolences to you and your boys

[Akbar]

539. Heartfelt Condolences to You and Your Family

n/t

[Cobalt Violet]

540. I'm very sorry for your loss.

[Ilsa]

542. I am so sorry for your loss, OMC. My mom died 7 years ago tonight.

My eight year old son said the other day that "everyone should have a mommy!" when he found out that my mom died when he was a baby. I feel so much for your litle boys right now. I wish I could wrap them in my arms and protect them from this horrible loss.

[Erva]

543. I am so sorry. n/t

[matcom]

544. OMG. JUST read

haven't been around due to work. searched for the other threads.

My friend, I am SOOOOO sorry.

aw fuck!

my heart breaks for you x(

stay strong brother

PEACE.

[JitterbugPerfume]

545. words can not express

the sadness we feel for you

[Red Zelda]

546. All my condolences

[LeahD]

547. We are all reminded of the fragility of life and how quickly we can lose the ones we love.

We are all connected and grieve with you, OMC.

[abq e streeter]

548. Typing this through my own tears

God bless you and your children, and may God envelop Stacy in perfect light and love.

[emmadoggy]

549. This is such terribly sad news.

My deepest condolences to you, OMC, to your children, and to all who knew and loved Stacey.

May she rest in peace.

:cry: :cry:
:hug:

[creeksneakers2]

550. I'm so sorry for your loss

My prayers are being said for you.

[Vektor]

551. I'm so sorry.

:hug:

[antigop]

552. So very, very sorry, OMC. n/t

[Greylyn58]

553. I can't begin to tell you how sorry I am for your loss

Please know that you and your boys will be in my thoughts and prayers. We are all here for you and your family. :grouphug:

[FuzzySlippers]

554. I am so very very sorry.

:hug:

[spooky3]

555. my condolences to you and I hope you will call on your friends

and family for help and support, even for the little day to day stuff that must be done. They can help you get through this very difficult time.

[Dystopian]

556. Sending love...

I don't have words...but yours were beautiful...I felt them.
Stacey's light will forever shine on...you have your children...
blessings, peace & love to your family...
Heartfelt condolences...



peace~

[TorchTheWitch]

557. Oh my dear, I am so terribly sorry!

I just have no words.
:cry:

[Buzz Clik]

558. so much sadness. All the best, OMC.

[WillyT]

559. Oh God OMC... I Am So Sorry...

((((((((((((((OMC & Family))))))))))))))

:grouphug:

[Ken Burch]

560. If I were you, I wouldn't read today's "Funky Winkerbean"

It deals with the same event. It does so gently and elegantly, but you probably wouldn't have the heart or the strength to read it on this day.

You'll need your rest. Be at peace, my brother.

[Bombero1956]

561. so very sorry to hear of your loss

I didn't know Stacey or your family, but I feel as though I've lost a dear friend. May God's grace be with you and your family.

[FooFootheSnoo]

562. So sorry for your loss

Deepest condolences. I will pray for you and your family.

[Buzz Clik]

563. this isn't much ... just a symbol of support:

[Turn CO Blue]

564. OMC I am so, so sorry for your loss

[TheDoorbellRang]

565. I am so sorry, OMC

Please know that I pray for you to have the strength to bear this terrible burden.

When my mother died, someone gave me the following poem. It was a poem found by a son in his mother's effects after the mother had passed away. Hope it gives you even a little solace as it did for me:

The Legacy

When I die, give what is left of me to children.
If you need to cry, cry for your brothers walking beside you.
Put your arms around anyone and give them what you need to give to me.
I want to leave you with something,
something better than words or sounds.
Look for me in the people I have known and loved.
And if you cannot live without me,
then let me live on in your eyes, your mind,
and your acts of kindness.
You can love me most by letting hands touch hands and letting go
of children that need to be free.
Love does not die, people do.
So when all that is left of me is love...
Give me away.

by John Wayne Schlatter


Take care of you and yours, OMC. You are in my thoughts and prayers.

[Lerkfish]

566. OMC, you can print this out and save it for later, after the numbness leaves

a helpful grief letter...
Posted by Lerkfish in Bereavement Group
Thu Jun 22nd 2006, 08:02 PM
I have been widowed, and lost people close to me, so I wrote this letter to some people to help them out with their own loss...

A loss of any kind is hard to take. Good advice is still good advice, and I hope you don’t mind that I’ve already offered this others before you.

I know how people around you are struggling with their desire to bring you comfort at this time, while at the same time not having any idea what is the right thing to say. It seems we are taught many things in our lives, except that one thing which would be infinitely useful -- how to tell someone we care about how we are saddened by their loss, and want to offer support and encouragement. I don’t have the answer, either, but I thought I would write you this letter as if I were writing to myself, when I was widowed.
First off and foremost, remember that there is still love and good in the world, and that you deserve your own portion of that. It sure may not seem like that’s true right now, but its hard to see when you're hurting.
Second, there are or can be people around who care for you. In a time of grief it becomes difficult to see that. Later on (and there WILL be a “later on”), you’ll remember little things people did out of concern for you that may not be obvious now. I can remember people asking me to lunch, of coffee, etc., and several phone calls. At the time I just wanted to withdraw into myself and avoid contact with anyone. How could they know what I was going through? I didn’t realize at the time that it really didn’t matter if they understood exactly what I was going through, it only matters that they cared.
Some advice from someone who has already traveled this road:

1. GET OR ACCEPT HELP (even if it’s only a friendly shoulder). I had always prided myself on being someone who helped out others, on being independent, and not really needing anyone. But I finally had to break down and get some help. I’m so glad I did. Sometimes being widowed (or losing a loved one) is a burden too large to bear alone, because not only have you lost someone who meant more to you than life itself, and who you would have gladly given your own life NOT to lose; but everything you have come to depend on as your normal life is uprooted. Even mundane things like toothbrushes and how much food to cook. One side of the bed (or house) is empty, and even little things like TV shows you enjoyed watching together seem not the same. Dangerous thoughts like “how can I go on...” run through your head. But I can definitely tell you those thoughts are wrong. There is nothing more precious to those around you and to God (or the universe) than your life, and how you live it from now on. That’s why you have to accept offered help, even if you’re not in mood. If for no other reason than to let those who offer it feel good about offering it. Because they’re at a loss as to how to help, so by letting them help in whatever small way, you’re helping them. And you’d be surprised how that will make you feel better.

2. LET YOURSELF GRIEVE. If you postpone or ignore your grief, it merely starts accumulating. Eventually you will have to deal with it, and sometimes the longer you wait, the harder it will be to deal with. Dealing with these emotions are difficult for anyone. I know for me, it was very hard, and I ended up drinking a lot, and throwing myself into my work in an effort to numb myself to it. To become something without emotion: if I couldn’t feel, I thought I couldn’t hurt.
But then what happens is those neglected emotions come out in whatever way they can. I would lose my temper irrationally over small, unimportant things, and be hurt or offended over offhand comments not even directed towards me. I became self-destructive and unconsciously pushed people away who were trying to help. If you find this sort of thing happening, you can be sure there is some undealt with grief lurking around.

3. DON’T BEAT YOURSELF UP. Guilty feelings do not help you grieve, they delay the process. Don’t get trapped into “ If only I had done...” or “If only I had said...”, because the only reason for asking those questions is to somehow punish yourself. I got involved in a widow/widowers group when I was having trouble, and you know what I found? Everyone there had a spouse die under completely different circumstances, yet all of them blamed themselves or felt guilty (notice I didn’t say they WERE guilty, just felt that way).
If a loved one died at work, they felt they should have been there when they died. If they were there, they felt helpless and somehow should have prevented it. If a loved one died suddenly, there was guilt for not expressing love one last time. If there was a prolonged illness, they felt guilty for thinking it was good for the suffering to be over. And on, and on, and on.
My particular guilt hurdle came about because the doctor advised me not to tell my wife she was dying, and to act like everything was normal, because the shock itself might kill her. After she died, I felt guilty that I wasn’t truthful with her (we never kept any secrets from each other).Guilt....Guilt....Guilt....Guilt....Guilt........
You know what? Sometimes people just pass on, and there’s nothing that can be done about it. AND it’s not your fault. Because all of us would never let our loved ones go if it were up to us. If you’re tempted to feel guilty anytime, put the shoe on the other foot; would you want your loved one to feel bad or guilty if you had passed first? Of course not.

4. BUY YOURSELF SOME NEW CLOTHES: I’m not sure why this helps exactly, unless it reminds you that life is continuing, you are still going places and doing things. But trust me on this one, it was a tremendous turning point for me.

5 DO SOMETHING THAT TAKES A WHILE TO DO; start a several-day project, and then another. It helps keep your mind planning things on in the future. Projects that only take one day don’t seem to do the same trick.

6. FIND WAYS TO HELP OTHERS. Try to find some small way to help others in place of that. This is an amazingly interesting thing: lightening the burdens of others reduces the weight of our own. Send a cheerful or humorous card to someone you’ve just met, for example. (Or knock on your neighbor’s door and stop by for coffee, just out of the blue).

7. MAKE A NEW FRIEND. One that knows you first as you are now, an individual, and add them to the circle of friends who knew you as part of a family.

8. REMEMBER THERE IS STILL JOY IN THE WORLD. There are still wonderful people to know, still beautiful things to see, still a lifetime of things to accomplish. Your life is still the adventure it started off being when you were just a new person. Adventures mean that both good things and bad things happen, but oh, what a ride! This is an important chapter of the book of your life, but there are many more page turns to come. Can’t wait to see what happens next

[halobeam]

628. wow

What a nice gift, your post.

We sometimes grieve losses that are not even of a loved one, and many things your post included, can apply as well.

I'm sure once OMC has found it's the right time to read all of these responses, he will find what parts he can use from this.

[RiffRandell]

567. I am so sorry.

My thoughts are with you and your family.

[aaronbees]

568. Such a sorrowful loss...

My deepest sympathies to you. OMC, I can't tell you how extraordinary it's been to read this as you've shared your pain and love here with us. No matter what, remember too that her love is always with you and the kids and despite the pain will comfort you in years to come. You made a wonderful life with her and nothing will ever take that away.

I went looking for a poem that says something interesting on death (hard to find!)... and found this from a poet I love. Hope it helps you.



A Meeting
by Wendell Berry

In a dream I meet
my dead friend. He has,
I know, gone long and far,
and yet he is the same
for the dead are changeless.
They grow no older.
It is I who have changed,
grown strange to what I was.
Yet I, the changed one,
ask: "How you been?"
He grins and looks at me.
"I been eating peaches
off some mighty fine trees."

:grouphug: :pals:

[somewhere_out_there]

569. God bless and be with you and your children today and always

and all of our prayers are with you for healing.

[ikojo]

570. OMC...

:cry: :hug: :grouphug:

[October]

571. I am so sorry

I am so sorry for your loss.

Yours was the most beautiful tribute I've ever read. I feel I knew your Stacey.

Blessings and angels to you and yours.

[snailly]

572. I'm so sorry, OMC

Your sweet Stacey touched my heart deeply. After watching your videos, I saw what a big-hearted, beautiful, caring and courageous woman she is and was. How could anyone (even total strangers) not love her?
My prayers and tears are with you and your sons.

[SCRUBDASHRUB]

573. I am so sorry for your loss.

:(

[LuckyLib]

574. I am so sorry.

You are a wonderful writer. As you heal and live for your sons, write your memories down for them. Verbal snapshots of her person, her humor, her spirit. As little ones, they'll need the photos and the descriptions by family of who their Mom was and how much she loved them. And your written record. Storie for them to keep forever.

[Blue Fire]

575. My condolences.....

When you need to, lean on us....
:grouphug:

[debbierlus]

576. Quote about ever enduring love....

i carry your heart with me,
i carry it in my heart and i'm never without it.
anywhere i go, you go, my dear.
and whatever is done, by only me, is your doing, my darling.
i fear no fear for you are my fate, my sweet.
i want no world for beautiful, you are my world my true.
it's you or whatever a moon has always meant,
and whatever a sun will always sing is you.
here is the deepest secret nobody knows
here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the tree called life
which grows higher and higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide
and this is the wonder that is keeping the stars apart
i carry your heart,
i carry it in my heart.

[Lithos]

577. I'm sorry to hear that

Many condolences to you and yours.

:hug:

[femmocrat]

578. My deepest and heartfelt sympathy, OMC.

Love and prayers to you and your family. :hug: :grouphug:

[Wilber_Stool]

579. So sorry.....n/t

[Gloria]

580. Godspeed, Stacey......

You still have a family, OMC. She will be with you and the boys forever....

[havocmom]

581. You are still a family

Stacy deserves that you stay a family. And she will be with you as you adjust to the new reality.

But family... that still exists on this plane. And in the next.

Sending strength, OMC.

And peace.

hm

[Wetzelbill]

582. My condolences

You all will be in my thoughts and prayers. RIP Stacey.

[dpbrown]

583. My condolences...

I lost my dad in February and I think about him every day.

:hug:

[Gregorian]

584. Great sorrow.

I feel it with you. There is only time.
I too, grieve. Loss is so painful. So permanent.
We go on together. It's all we have.

[Norma Druid]

585. Your Grief and Your Future

God bless you and yours. I am glad you have religious faith to comfort you; so many loose it at least temporarily with such a loss. What I want to tell you is to take advantage of all those helping hands. So many folks are afraid to admit an emotional weakness or need. I know some of your friends at the hospital can tell you how to get grief counseling and get it for the kids. Kids do act out when they loose a parent, a natural,inarticulate anger at loss. Get help to deal with this; I know it will be hard for you right now.

Your note indicates you have some financial pressures, too. Do reach out for help there. That´s so hard to deal with when you don´t feel like thinking straight.

I will be praying.

[masshole]

586. The Prophet chapter 27

Then Almitra spoke, saying, "We would ask now of Death."

And he said:

You would know the secret of death.

But how shall you find it unless you seek it in the heart of life?

The owl whose night-bound eyes are blind unto the day cannot unveil the mystery of light.

If you would indeed behold the spirit of death, open your heart wide unto the body of life.

For life and death are one, even as the river and the sea are one.

In the depth of your hopes and desires lies your silent knowledge of the beyond;

And like seeds dreaming beneath the snow your heart dreams of spring.

Trust the dreams, for in them is hidden the gate to eternity.

Your fear of death is but the trembling of the shepherd when he stands before the king whose hand is to be laid upon him in honour.

Is the shepherd not joyful beneath his trembling, that he shall wear the mark of the king?

Yet is he not more mindful of his trembling?

For what is it to die but to stand naked in the wind and to melt into the sun?

And what is to cease breathing, but to free the breath from its restless tides, that it may rise and expand and seek God unencumbered?

Only when you drink from the river of silence shall you indeed sing.

And when you have reached the mountain top, then you shall begin to climb.

And when the earth shall claim your limbs, then shall you truly dance.


Thoughts and prayers are with you OMC.

[KamaAina]

638. 10,000 views

(10,001, now)

Picture a flock of 10,000 birds all taking off from the surface of a lake at once, and flying away...

[ncabot22]

587. OMC - I'm so sorry for you and your sons

I can't pretend to know or understand what you are going through; I can only extend to you my deepest sympathies to you and your children.

[lavenderdiva]

588. OMC my heart is breaking reading your post

I'm so very sorry to hear of Stacey's passing. Mr. Ld and I have been praying each and very day for you and for Stacey since hearing of her condition. Please know that you are still in our prayers. Your eloquence is amazing. :hug: :cry: :hug:

[Tafiti]

589. Really sorry, OMC.

It sounds like you did everything you possibly could. Hang in there.

My mom died from cancer a few years ago, she was 47. To ease the pain, our family just sat around and told stories about all of the hysterical things she said and did. Kept us laughing and helped us to remember all the reasons why we loved her so much.

[Downtown Hound]

590. Many condolences to you right now

Grieve now, and grieve hard. But time will heal the wounds eventually.

[WinstonSmith4740]

591. I can only add my condolences...

Keep her in your heart. It's easy to say "be strong", but harder to do so. Just keep putting one foot in front of the other and take it one day at a time.:grouphug:

[pitohui]

592. i'm so sorry EOM

.

[virgdem]

593. My deepest condolences to you and your boys...

I've been following your tragic situation and I can imagine the pain and grief you are going through right now. I lost my Mom 4 years ago and it was a very difficult time. The DU community is here for you and we are grieving along with you. Whatever happens in the future, I'm sure that you will handle it with grace and wisdom.

[reyd reid reed]

594. My heart breaks for you...

I'm so sorry. Know that you're all in my thoughts. She'll always be with you.

Always.

[Reciprocity]

595. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

[deathdog]

596. My deepest, deepest sympathies....

:hug:

[Zuiderelle]

597. My deepest condolences to you and your children.

It's an inspiration to experience second-hand your love for her. May you find peace and comfort and inspiration to move forward again.

[omega minimo]

598. peace

"What I do know, is that I'll be strong enough to face it. I have a 2 yr old and 4 yr old boys who are going to need me to be stronger than ever and I know I will face that challenge well."



I know it too.


:hug:

[Left Is Write]

599. I'm very sorry, OMC.

[madinmaryland]

600. I'm sorry to hear of your loss.

[Danger Mouse]

601. OMC...

I wish I knew what to say.
I'm sorry.
:cry:
It's not right.
Hang in there. Everyone here is with you, for what it's worth.
:hug:

[Strawman]

602. I'm so very sorry, OMC

[Scooter24]

603. I am so sorry :(

My prayers and thoughts are with you, your family and your boys. :cry:

[LaStrega]

604. In another thread I said I had no words. I do have words. Two of 'em. Memorial Fund. Let's do it

[liberaltrucker]

605. God be with you, brother

We grieve with you. If there's anything I can do, please feel free
to PM. I can't begin to imagine the pain you feel. I'd be a basket
case. Peace, friend.

:cry:

[sueh]

606. I am so sorry, OMC.

I wish I had magical words to make you feel better, but all I can do right now is send you and your boys a hug. And remember, Stacey is not far from you. :hug:

[Flatulo]

607. Sincere condolences - we've lost three dear friends now to breast cancer.

Nay your beloved wife rest in peace, and may you find peace for yourself.

[YvonneCa]

608. Hold her in your heart...

...and share her love and wonderful spirit with your sons. You are still a family. My greatest sympathy to all of you.

[countmyvote4real]

609. I am so sorry for your loss.

I get my news from DU. I know that I've been avoiding it lately. And it's not because * is about to bomb Iran. It's because your family has been in my thoughts or prayers or whatever.

I still cannot understand how this happened. I’m choking up. This is not what I wanted to hear. God knows it’s that much worse for you.

You’ve got your boys to look after. You will find that Stacey still lives there in DNA and spirit. Celebrate that. Live the rest of your lives for her. I don’t presume to have known her personally. I only know what you gave us. She was remarkable. And however you want to interpret it, she chose or settled for you. Either way, you will rise to the situation. That’s why you have two beautiful boys from the love of your life.

Please, forgive my intrusive speculation. Your story touched me in so many ways. (My baby sister is in chemo for breast cancer.) I wish you whatever peace you can find under the circumstances.

I mourn your loss. And you will do what you have to do for your boys. Peace.

[Telly Savalas]

610. Stay strong, man.

Your kids are lucky to have you in their life.

[windbreeze]

611. So, so sorry to hear this....

I was hoping everything would be ok...Take care...and take each day as it comes...one at a time...condolences to you and your family...everyone affected...wb

[RamboLiberal]

612. Too young - there are no adequate words

I'm very sorry to read this OMC. I'm sorry that you lost a beautiful wife and that your sons lost their wonderful mother way too soon. Rest in Peace Stacey. God Bless you OMC and God Bless your sons. Be as strong as you for them, they need you more than ever. Again my deepest, deepest, sympathies.

[lumberjack_jeff]

613. I wish that language wasn't so inadequate. I am so sorry OMC.

[Blue_In_AK]

614. I'm so sorry for your loss, OMC

but know that your love WILL last forever. Nothing can take it away from you. Stacey lives in your heart.

:hug:

[hisownpetard]

615. What a beautiful human being, your Stacey. Now all the love that she inspired

from anyone who came in contact with her has flown right into your heart.
Love is never lost! How fortunate you were to have her, just as she was
to have you. She was truly valued and adored.

She knew, she knew, she knew.

[merh]

616. Words fail me

You and Stacey and your boys remain in my prayers. :hug:








.

[RainDog]

617. So sorry for your loss

I know that sadness from the loss of a close loved one. Your children will want you to keep memories for them about their mother for when they're older. Or on every birthday. Things they did with her, things she thought was funny. What she liked to do. About the day you and your wife welcomed your child onto the earth.

Time heals the grief and you will be able to see the beauty of the time you had together without the ache of sorrow. I know that's hard to believe now, but love lasts and it heals.

[njdemocrat106]

618. I wish there was something stronger for me to say than "I'm sorry".

I feel that I am at a loss for words; I was hoping I'd never have to read this message.

Our loss is Heaven's gain, and I will continue to pray for you, and your loved ones, that you all may find some sort of comfort during this extremely difficult time.

True love is eternal; it is one of the few things we can bring from this life into the next.

[question everything]

619. Adding my words to the ones

expressed here, of sorrow and pain.

Through your recent post I found out about the beauty and courage of Stacey.

My deepest condolences to your and your family.

[highplainsdem]

620. I am so sorry, OMC. Prayers for you and your family,

The Traveler

By James Dillet Freeman

She has put on invisibility.
Dear Lord, I cannot see---
But this I know although the road ascends
And passes from my sight,
That there will be no night;
That You will take her gently by the hand
And lead her on Along the road of life that never ends,
And she will find it is not death but dawn.
I do not doubt that You are there as here,
And you will hold her dear.

Our life did not begin with birth,
It is not of the earth;
And this that we call death, it is no more
Than the opening and closing of a door---
And in Your house how many rooms must be
Beyond this one where we rest momently.

Dear Lord, I thank you for the faith that frees,
The love that knows it cannot lose its own;
The love that, looking through the shadows, sees
That You and she and I are ever one

[Phentex]

621. I'm so sorry...

My heart goes out to you! :hug:

[GenDem]

622. So very sorry, OMC

:cry:
:hug:

[ocean girl]

623. Your strength shines through your grief

Always remember, you have a family of friends here.

Give yourself time to grieve - the first year will be the hardest and life will never be the same, but there is hope for happiness again.

Peace to you and your family.

[BlackVelvet04]

624. I'm so very sorry for your loss.

Your love for her is a beautiful tribute.

[SarahB]

625. I'm sorry for your loss. My heart is with you and your boys. nt

[Bryn]

626. I am speechless

Please know that she has touched us all here as well as your great love for her.

My deepest sympathies and love for you and your two little boys. Yes, she was an angel and still is.

[asthmaticeog]

627. I'm so sorry, OMC.

My sincerest condolences to you and your family.

[halobeam]

629. True love lives forever, you are right about that OMC.

I've followed your posts, and I'd like to say, you are one amazing person too! Your children have lost one incredible human being to experience life with, but in the mysterious ways that life works: they really have her and always will.. through you, through her other loved ones, and through their own body and souls.

Your children have you (who from what I've seen), have taken the most difficult times that life can offer, with love, beauty and grace. This, they will benefit from and from your wifes and YOUR own love of life, will nurture them through the life they have ahead of them. I truly believe also, that all of you will be fine. Love DOES heal.

Peace with all of you through your grieving, and love which will always live on.

[dogday]

630. I am so sorry for your loss... My Brother died last month

and this is the first time I have been able to post anything to DU... The sheer depth of the depression I have fallen into leaves me not wanting to have communication with anyone....

Don't let it eat you up inside... I am getting there with help from family and friends... I wish you and your wonderful boys the best....

Shawnee

[philosophie_en_rose]

631. I'm so sorry, OMC.

:pals:

[Haole Girl]

632. Just saw your thread...

Got back from a trip today and just saw this. I've been staring at a blank message window for over 20 minutes wondering what words could possibly suffice. God, OMC, I just don't know what to say. I'm so sorry. We are all thinking of you. :hug:

[hippywife]

633. At this point so late in the thread,

I have little to add that hasn't already been said. I only wish to add my deepest condolences and sincerest wishes for healing with time. Oh, and hugs. :hug: :hug: :hug:

[Robb]

634. Stay well, brother.

Sounds like you've got some big damn shoes to fill there for the boys. I know you're got it in you.

[lumberingbear]

635. I'm very sorry for your loss OMC.

:cry: :hug:

[Batgirl]

636. You and your boys and everyone who loved her are in my thoughts nt

[quiet.american]

637. OMC, it's impossible to express how sorry I am for your loss, but I'm so sorry. God bless. n/t

[Whimsy]

639. Stacey's Passing

Dear OMC, I just got online after a few days and searched for news about Stacey. I am shocked and so sad for all of you. I had hoped like everyone else she would beat this thing. You have to learn now to stay in the present moment and to handle one hurdle at a time. Don't try to figure out next week or next month or twenty years down the road. Just do what you have to do and remember, love does NOT die. Stacey's spirit is with you all the time now and she will help you to raise your little guys. Take every hug you can get and cry until you are dried out. Don't try to be stoic. So many of us are sending you love and strength and Stacey would be, I mean IS, so proud of you and the Dad you are going to be to those little boys. Hugs. Whimsy

[momophile]

640. so sorry to hear of your loss

your story has touched so many here. thanks for sharing it with us. please take care of yourself and those wonderful children of yours.

[Pushed To The Left]

641. I'm very sorry to hear about Stacey's passing

:hug: She sounded like an incredible woman and we can all tell how much you love her. We at DU may have never met Stacey in person, but through your posts you showed us what a special, wonderful person she truly was. We will all miss her.