The Padre is in the house. The confessional is now open for business. How have you sinned?

[ohiosmith]

[Hugin]

1. Father, forgive me for I have sinned.

I've said the word 'nipples' over a dozen times today.

[ohiosmith]

5. Say three Hail Jane Mansfield's. Go and suck no more.

[sniffa]

2. i'm way too nice

[JVS]

4. not modest enough either

[ohiosmith]

10. Kill a small child's pet. In front of the child of course. That should do it.

[AlCzervik]

3. you don't have enough time or rosary beads to help me.

[ohiosmith]

12. Get thee behind me spawn of Satan.

[billyskank]

6. Father, I have sinned.

I have inseminated every female within a 1 mile radius.

Oh wait, that was an aspiration.

[KitchenWitch]

7. Remember, dear child, if you have thought it, it is as if you have done it!

;)

[billyskank]

9. I hope the Child Support Agency don't see it that way.

:D

[KitchenWitch]

13. Yah, that would be a problem!

:D

[ohiosmith]

15. Back to the nunnery with you woman.

[ohiosmith]

14. You too?

[XemaSab]

42. Aspirating semen can really wreak havoc with your lungs.

Either spit or swallow, but don't aspirate. :P

[madinmaryland]

8. I'm not Catholic. Does that matter?

[ohiosmith]

16. We have an exciting offer for new members.

[madinmaryland]

27. I'm a Pastafarian. Not interested.

[redqueen]

11. I fantasize about corrupting young priests.

:(

[ohiosmith]

18. You too?

[redqueen]

19. Oh yes...

older ones, too...

:evilgrin:

[ohiosmith]

26. First you must separate the men from the boys. Go my daughter and sin copiously.

[redqueen]

31. YES!

:bounce:

[billyskank]

41. And move to within a mile of me.

:7

[unpossibles]

17. I totally forgot

and went into the GD.

[ohiosmith]

21. Say three Our Skinners and go not again to GD.

[LSK]

20. forgive me father for I have posted in GD

:D

[ohiosmith]

22. See post 21.

[LSK]

24. but I also put someone on ignore

Is that a HUGH sin?

[ohiosmith]

29. That depends on who the someone is. If it is MrCoffee, all is forgiven.

[LSK]

33. what if it was ohiosmith?

:popcorn: :popcorn: :popcorn: :popcorn: :popcorn:

[ohiosmith]

35. You are not only forgiven, you will on the day of your death, sit at the right hand of God.

[LSK]

37. I hear hes a left thou

:popcorn:

[MrCoffee]

36. false priest! heretic! schismatic blasphemer! relapsi!

[LSK]

43. pelosi! reid! dems!!!

Oops, thought I was in GD again!

:popcorn:

[ohiosmith]

44. Scram! You little bastard.

[MrCoffee]

46. HA! you confess, you lecherous knave!

[LSK]

48. hey, this is my confessional booth, how did you get in here?

[ohiosmith]

49. Father Guido has something for you behind the alter.

[NewWaveChick1981]

23. Not Catholic, so I don't have to tell YOU....

:P :rofl: :hi: :evilgrin:

[ohiosmith]

32. No one is perfect my daughter.

[flvegan]

25. I have sinned greatly.

Last evening, I had a dream where I coveted another DUer. Nothing happened, but alas, the covet was there.

[ohiosmith]

34. The Padre will need a little more detail in order to appropriately gauge the magnitude of your sin.

[flvegan]

62. If I tell you that, LostinVA will kill me.

Technically, she's a FORMER DUer, not currently with us, but still...the coveting was there.

[ohiosmith]

64. The Padre can keep a secret.

[MrCoffee]

28. Forgive me, father, for i have sinned

i stole a tire from the pile behind the bait shop.

[billyskank]

30. I sacked the guy who was supposed to be watching them.

[ohiosmith]

40. Then it's straight to hell with you.

Dude! That was my part time gig.

[ohiosmith]

38. Make restitution to he who is responsible for the pile in the form of a six, no 12 pack.

Go and sin no more my son.

[XemaSab]

39. Every time the collection plate passes

I make it look like I am putting money in, but I'm really taking money out, and using the money to buy beer. :P

[LSK]

45. what are you doing in Church in the 1st place?

:poopconr"

[XemaSab]

50. Lusting after nuns

:)

[billyskank]

51. Hey! Me too.

:D

[XemaSab]

53. I heard Anglican nuns are all frowsy.

:P

[ohiosmith]

59. Precisely why I'm a Franciscan.

[XemaSab]

61. That's not a Franciscan!

THAT'S a Franciscan! :o

[LSK]

54. BRILLIANT!!

:opocorn":

[ohiosmith]

47. Sister Mary Margaret owes you an ass kicking.

[LSK]

55. I think thats what she wants

[ohiosmith]

57. Just don't let it become a habit.

[Parche]

52. I Lynne Sinned With My Nipples

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :hi:

[ohiosmith]

56. Say four Hail Led Zeppelin's, do the stations of Eagles Stadium.

Go and sin no more my son.

[Dr. Strange]

58. Have I sinned?

Oh man, don't get me started!

[ohiosmith]

60. Keep it to the last week or so. I have fun shit I want to do today. Okay?

[Dr. Strange]

63. I've had a few dozen impure thoughts.

Some involving redqueen, Connonym, LeftyMom, KitchenWitch, another one involving redqueen, another one involving KitchenWitch (but she was twins, so there were two of her), ...
there was one involving Parche and a bunch of sheep...
there was something involving Rabrrrrr, a bar of soap, and some peanut butter...
and maybe one involving LynneSin and Led Zepplin.

There might be some that I'm missing, but you get the idea.

[ohiosmith]

65. No sins as far as the Padre can tell, except maybe the peanut butter stuff. Was Smucker's grape

jelly involved?

[Dr. Strange]

67. I think so...

but it wasn't spelled "smuckers," let me tell you!

[ohiosmith]

68. Then you're cool.

[BarenakedLady]

66. I've had sinful lustful thoughts.

Oh yes!

And there is another one...

and another...

Oops, and another!

:evilgrin:

[ohiosmith]

69. Say 12 George Clooney's and do the stations of Brad Pitt.

Go forth and fantasize.

[BarenakedLady]

70. There goes another!

:9

[billyskank]

71. You!

:o


:*

[BarenakedLady]

72. Ooops another

You are NOT helping!

;)

[ohiosmith]

73. BillySkank, you are an enabler. Back to the rectory with you.

[BarenakedLady]

76. Now, now

Let's not get testes here...

[Dyedinthewoolliberal]

74. I rooted for Ohio in the BCS

and being a native born Michigander I feel so, well, slimy..................... :toast:

[ohiosmith]

77. Your place of birth will not be held against you my son. The important thing is that you have

seen the light and accepted Jim Tressel as you lord and savior.

Go in peace.

[TrogL]

75. I have failed to update Loonie Watch every day

[ohiosmith]

78. Say three Pierre Trudeau's and six Hail Canadiens.

[Phillycat]

79. Bless me Father, for I have sinned.

I can't stop staring at Chase Utley's butt. :D

[ohiosmith]

80. Say two Hail Mantles and take a cold shower.

[DarkTirade]

81. Not nearly as often or recently as I'd like.

And not in as many interesting positions as I'd like either.