DU Party Flat: Alexandria, Egypt

[onager]

So OK, I've been living in this apartment in Alexandria, Egypt for a couple of weeks now. I got away with living in a nice hotel for the past 2 years, but my bosses recently converted that TWO-YEAR!!! "temporary" assignment into "permanent" status. So I had to find an apartment.

If you're a-touristing in Egypt, drop in and see me! I can offer the following amenities:

--The Mediterranean Sea is...close. Like right behind me, less than 100 yards away.
--A major American hotel is right next door. Maybe the one you're staying in.
--The local Heineken distributor will deliver to my door. No small perk in a 95% Muslim country!
--DSL and (after Saturday) the Orbit satellite TV network
--Daily housekeeping. Except Fridays, of course.
--Metro supermarket is a 5 minute walk. So is the Momen sandwich shop (cheap and clean, English-speaking). And their fierce competitors, the Mouslim sandwich shop where all the counter clerks look like Osama bin Laden. I could care less, they make a great foot-long hot dog. I just had to learn the Arabic script for "hot dog" so I could point it out on their no-English, Arabic-only menu.
--If you insist, guided city tours by Yours Truly. At least I speak passable English, for a person who grew up in South Carolina. I can show you where Cleopatra VII committed suicide (virtually on the steps of the Hotel Cecil). And where Julius Caesar almost drowned. And where Lawrence Durrell wrote the You-Know-What Quartet. And where E.M. Forster lost his virginity, near Montazah with a British soldier.

Top THAT, Frommer!

[MrCoffee]

1. that's all well and good, but the real question is

how close are you to the olive garden?

[onager]

6. You mean the ersatz Italian restaurant chain?

They are not here. Yet.

Egypt does have McDonald's, KFC, Pizza Hut, Starbucks, Chili's etc. etc.

In Cairo, there's even a Pizza Hut right outside Giza. The Sphinx could reach out his paw and grab a slice.

Ramadan is going on right now, so my landlord has been kindly bringing me up a plate of iftar leftovers most nights. Chicken marinated in garlic and peppers with rice, lamb and beef kebabs, etc. etc. Nothing like McDonalds...:eyes:

[mainegreen]

2. I presume it's a beef hot dog stand then.

And not a pork one?

[onager]

7. You would presume right!

All-beef. You can get pork here. Egypt has a couple of humongous pig farms, which annoys the Islamic fundamentalists immensely.

I spent 2 years working in Saudi Arabia, and we could even get pork there in the heart of Wahhabi Nation. You just had to go to the right butcher shop and ask for white steak. They would serve you up incredibly thick pork chops, perfect for barbecuing.

:rofl:

I keep telling my bosses that after all my adventures in the Middle East, I would like an assignment in a non-Muslim locale. e.g., Amsterdam would be nice.

So far they are ignoring me. No surprise there...

[LibertyLover]

12. Same thing in Israel -

couple of years ago my mom and I were there and at dinner one night in the meat section of the hotel's kosher restaurant, the Israeli waiter told us in a voice not much above a whisper that one of the specials that evening was "roast flesh of the unknown animal". When we looked somewhat puzzled, he very carefully and in an even softer voice, said "pork". We ordered it and got served lovely, perfectly done loin of pork flavored with rosemary and thyme.

[LadyoftheRabbits]

3. OMG, that's awesome...

I would *love* to see Alexandria, and the rest of Egypt. :D :hi:

[onager]

9. Well, come on over and don't miss Alexandria!

Sadly, many tourists do miss it. Despite a lot of...*cough*...setbacks, Alexandria is still the most liberal and cosmopolitan city in Egypt. It not only has ancient cemeteries for Greek/Roman pagans, Christians, Jews, and Muslims--Alexandria has Freethinker's Cemeteries, for those cranky people like me who voted "None Of The Above In Heaven (Or Anywhere Else)!"

For the record, I am an atheist. Some of my Muslim and Coptic Christian co-workers know that. Doesn't seem to bother them at all.

Alexandria's easy-going attitude has not escaped the attention of the Islamic Fundamentalist asshats, who are always trying to cause trouble here. So far I have been thru 2 big religious riots in Alexandria, between the Muslims and the Coptic Christians. Another religious uproar just blew up last week, but was put down fairly quickly. The riot in April 2006 happened pretty close to where I live. It was seriously ugly: burned out cars, people attacked in their homes and stores, etc.

According to my Egyptian friends, all that trouble has been fomented by Islamic ultra-Fundies from outside Egypt. I believe they are right. Every day I see Christians and Muslims working side by side with never a harsh word. I would not know their religious beliefs except for the occasional gentle joke between them, e.g. about taking religious holidays off.

Well, that was depressing. Sorry.

Here, some stuff to see in Alexandria:

--Pompey's Pillar: a 100-foot column that has nothing to do with Pompey The Great (this is a pattern in Alexandria. If a place has a famous person's name attached, then you can assume the place has absolutely no association with that person.) The column may have come from the ancient temple to Serapis, the Serapeum. Wherever it came from, the Alexandrians erected it in honor of the Roman emperor Diocletian, after he rescued the city from a famine.

The name "Pompey's Pillar" came from some visiting Crusaders, who started a rumor that Pompey The Great's decapitated head was preserved in a box on top of the pillar. I love these Fun Facts...

--Remains of the Alexandria Library annex: right underneath Pompey's Pillar. You can still see the wall niches where scrolls were stored and a huge stone "conference table" for the scholars. Believed to be an annex of the famous Great Alexandria Library.

--Catacombs of El-Choqaufa: incredible 3-story underground tomb complex. Dates from Roman times, when the religions of Rome, Greece, and ancient Egypt were merging. A wall painting of Anubis embalming Osiris is located right smack above a Greek scene of Persephone being dragged off to Hades. On a wall carving, Anubis and the crocodile god Sobek are depicted in the uniforms of Roman soldiers. Totally weird. Don't miss the Shrine Of Nemesis, marked by a pile of horse and human bones. And watch where you step! The electrc lights often fail down there.

--Graeco-Roman Museum: apparently closed semi-permanently for renovation. Dammit. This place is really awesome, containing the famous busts of Alexander The Great and one of the few surviving statues of Cleopatra. She is dressed as Isis and wears a smile more enigmatic than the Mona Lisa. Also a statue of Marcus Aurelius vandalized by Xians to add a cross on his belt buckle.

My favorite statue is one of Venus and her brat kid, Cupid. The placard says Venus is removing her sandal to get ready for her bath. I think she's removing her sandal to swat Cupid because he just shot an arrow at Laura Bush...

--Roman amphitheater: pay the extra admission to see "The Villa of the Birds." This was an entire Roman residential complex: theater, public baths, and several private homes. The name "Villa of the Birds" comes from the incredibly elaborate floor mosaics in one house, depicting native Egyptian birds.

--Nebi Daniel Mosque: legend says Alexander The Great is buried in its underground chambers. Legend is most likely talking out its Cheney. He was probably planted in the Alabaster Tomb. Archeologists are still digging there as I write, so it is sort of Off Limits right now.

--Bibliotecha Alexandria: the rebuilt Alexandria Library, which got a lot of money from Bill Gates. Pay the extra admission for the basement-level museums. They contain elaborate floor mosaics from a Roman house unearthed during construction of the Library in 1994.

One of the mosaics, from a Roman dining room, is a spooky Medusa. That should get rid of those long-winded dinner guests!

[LadyoftheRabbits]

16. Whoa...

That sounds unbelievable. I'd absolutely love it. :D

[yellowdogintexas]

4. aw Jeez, I am jealous!

when I win the lotto, I will let you know.

[SPKrazy]

5. Sounds cool...

if I ever go, I'll shoot you a pm if you still live there!

[TZ]

8. I would love to visit Egypt but first

I would have to make sure my will was up to date!!! Family joke-we are Jewish and my Uncle visited Egypt last year..my Dad was so convinced the Muslim "terrarists" were going to get him he badgered him about doing his will before he left. After expressing envy from seeing his pictures and hearing his story he said that I should go as long as my will is done.....:rofl:

[onager]

10. Not to worry!

Most Egyptians don't have a problem with Jews. Until fairly recently Egypt had a large Jewish population. Especially Alexandria. They might have a problem if you were currently employed by the State Of Israel.

Funny Story #1: many of my Egyptian co-workers had training at our company's facility in Los Angeles. Sometimes they got hungry for real Middle Eastern food, but they had to make sure it was halal--the Muslim version of kosher.

So naturally, when the hungry Muslims wanted some down-home cooking...they searched out a kosher Jewish deli. The religious dietary rules are pretty much the same.

That just cracks me up.

Funny Story #2: the Egyptian government, with great patriotic PR fanfare, recently re-named a street in Cairo "The Street Of The Egyptians."

But most Cairenes continue to call that street the name by which it was known for, oh, 700 years or so--"The Street of the Jews."

[TZ]

19. LOL!

My Uncle LOVED Cairo, where he stayed, (except for the traffic!) and pretty much expressed the opinion you did..and then went on to tell me about his sexy Egyptian tour guide a woman wearing low rider American jeans...not exactly the popular image of Egyptian women in this country....:D

[Scooter24]

11. I've always wanted to visit Egypt...

but felt that it isn't a safe place to vacation with my boyfriend. I haven't really researched it but maybe one day I'll get to check it out. :)

I'm still jealous though :hi:

[opiate69]

13. Damn! That would be so freaking awesome...

Alas, the bank account says otherwise.

[Flaxbee]

14. ohhh, that sounds fabulous!

I was in Egypt in 1996: Cairo, Aswan, and Luxor before going on to Turkey. Would love to see Alexandria, and I may just take you up on the offer one of these days/months/years.

Where in SC did you grow up? My husband is from Columbia....

[onager]

17. Howdy, homegirl!

:hi:

I grew up in Oconee County, not far from Clemson.

I probably shouldn't say that. People from Columbia tend to be USC fans. :-)

[cloudbase]

15. When my ship was in Alexandria a bunch of years ago,

I had the "new man special" at the barber in the Hotel Cecil. Haircut, straight razor shave, manicure and massage. I actually felt human again when I walked out of there. Have a beer for me at the Spitfire, but not one of those nasty Stellas.

[onager]

18. I'll have a Sakkara.

I'm not a big beer drinker, but I've developed a taste for Sakkara. Strange. I don't care for Stella either.

The Cecil probably hasn't changed a bit since you were here. They did move the bar. It used to be right beside the lobby, but they put it upstairs. Out of sight, out of the way of offended religious sensibilities, I guess.

Many times on weekends, just for the heck of it, I take a tram down to Ramleh Station--that big train depot near the Cecil. I live a few miles east of downtown Alexandria. During the week I have a 90-minute one-way commute to work, so on weekends I'm usually glad to be OUT of a car!

The trams cost 25 piasters--about a nickel. Every tram-car still has a real live conductor who takes your money and gives you a ticket. At Ramleh Station I often wander over to the Cecil to check out the bookstore in the lobby. If I'm feeling ambitious, I'll pony up another 25 piasters and take a "yellow tram" out to Ras el-Tin. That's the western edge of Alexandria, most famous for the big palace. That area has some ancient Greek cemeteries that are in danger of disappearing underwater.