Words!

[Archae]

FOR LEXOPHILES (LOVERS OF WORDS)

1. A bicycle cannot stand alone; it is two tired.
2. A will is a dead giveaway.
3. Time flies like an arrow, fruit flies like a banana.
4. A backward poet writes inverse.
5. In a democracy its your vote that counts; in feudalism, it's
your Count that votes.
6. A chicken crossing the road; poultry in motion.
7. If you don't pay your exorcist you get repossessed.
8. With her marriage she got a new name and a dress.
9. Show me a piano falling down a mineshaft and I'll show you a
flat miner.
10. When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds.
11. The guy who fell in an upholstery machine was fully recovered.
12. A grenade fell onto a kitchen floor in France, resulted in
Linoleum, Blown-apart.
13. You are stuck with your debt if you can't budge it.
14. Local Area Network in Australia: The LAN down under.
15. He broke into song because he couldn't find the key.
16. A calendar's days are numbered.
17. A lot of money is tainted: 'taint yours, and 'taint mine.
18. A boiled egg is hard to beat.
19. He had a photographic memory that was never developed.
20. A plateau is a high form of flattery.
21. A short fortune teller that escaped from prison: A small medium
at large.
22. Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the
end.
23. When you've seen one shopping center you've seen the Mall.
24. If you jump off a Paris bridge you are in Seine.
25. When she saw her first strand of gray hair she thought she'd
dye.
26. Bakers share bread recipes on a knead-to-know basis.
27. Santa's helpers are subordinate Clauses.
28. Acupuncture: A jab well done.

:D