So I'm tossing around in my head

[SPKrazy]

the idea of moving about an hour or so away from here

pros:

liberal area
more cultural opportunities
demographics of population more to my liking
out of this place

cons:
1 hour or so away from my son**
higher cost of living
:shrug: dunno what else

any thoughts lounge on this?

I know vague as hell

just general ideas especially regarding the ** hour away from my son

[otherlander]

1. Would you have to change jobs?

:shrug:

:hi:

[SPKrazy]

2. that would be a plan

to do

yes

[XboxWarrior]

4. Well an hour away from your son......

could be a good thing.

I say, "Pack the bags, and get on the road".

[SPKrazy]

6. He's

7 y/o

[XboxWarrior]

10. Better take him with you then........

if you leave him at the Bus Stop, that could be against some law.

[SPKrazy]

43. could you just fuck off a little please?

go play with your friends somewhere else

[RetroLounge]

35. Shut up and go away

eom

RL

[NMDemDist2]

3. it's already tearing you apart

why do something to make it worse when it's still so fresh?

maybe better to get used to the new 'normal' before you make it even harder?

:shrug:

[SPKrazy]

5. Yeah, I'm not thinking of this minute

more down the road say next year-ish sometime?

:shrug:

good point though

[NMDemDist2]

8. check your PM n/t

[SPKrazy]

9. ...

hard ass

:rofl:

[lost-in-nj]

7. Where is this???

where would you work??
need more info to help you make a decision.....


i think being 1 hour from SPK jr.
is not bad.... maybe Mrs. SPK could meet you half way on your days....



hey
is this really what you want to do???
think about it.... 'K?


:hug:

what is this about.???

cub scouts is a long way away

I find if I put things on paper
they seem real

do a PRO/CON list......


lost

[SPKrazy]

11. a lot of questions

just tossing things around

up in Northwest Arkansas

work, there are lots of possibilities there

pros and cons on paper is a good idea

what is it about?

I hate it here... have for 18 years

like it up north better.

:shrug:

[lost-in-nj]

12. .....

:hug:


I have seen pictures and it is beautiful

but I will bet it snows more!!!!


:rofl: :rofl:

lost

[SPKrazy]

23. sometimes it snows a lot more there

in fact it does for sure

for instance in that area and north they got 5-7 inches this past week

we got a dusting

:P

[Droopy]

13. If you can still spend valuable time with your son

and the move would increase your financial well being I would say go for it. But I know you love your boy and I would make sure that you could still see him and that the move would be to a great advantage.

[SPKrazy]

22. I would still see him

the question is would it be a limiting factor

in some ways it would limit during the week visits, although not impossible

gas is high

good points droopy

thanks

[harmonicon]

14. depends

not to get too much into your personal life without permission, but how often do you see your son/would you if you moved? If it's every day or two, an hour away might be hard. If it's weekends, just an hour isn't so much (though I guess if you have to do the picking up and dropping off, that could really add up in terms of time and gas money). However, if living somewhere else would make you happier on a day to day basis, maybe it's worth going for. Personally, I don't really mind living in a boring place, but if I didn't have any friends here, it would probably suck. Boring aside, I have a nice quality of life in terms of a decent place to live, nice take out food, close to the grocery store.... little things can make a place to live very good.

[SPKrazy]

21. some very good points in that post

thanks

[Fire Walk With Me]

15. When in doubt, throw it out.

Your son is so special to you, all one has to do is to read your posts about him. Don't do that to yourself, and to him as well. I think that you already know this. Peace!

[SPKrazy]

20. I see Jesus in your snowflake

my son is special

I will have to think about it

it would limit some things with him

[Fire Walk With Me]

38. Here I am trying to give direction.. I'm completely unqualified.

I pray that the best thing for everyone is revealed to you.

[SallyMander]

16. No advice here SPK

I think if it'll make you happy, and won't cause you too much trouble with visiting your son, it could be a good thing! Sometimes a change is what you need... but if it'll be a hassle trying to pick him up and drop him off, then probably not worth it. It's very obvious that he is the sun, moon and stars to you. :hug:

[SPKrazy]

19. thanks dear

:hug:

[madinmaryland]

17. Moving fucking sucks. If you need anything else, DON't MOVE!

I hate fucking moving!

I'm now four hours from my son.

MOVING SUCKS!!1!!

Think about it.

[SPKrazy]

18. I do hate moving

however, I will move from this apt at some point
where to is the question

[SKKY]

24. I change locations about every 3 years...

...whether I want to or not. Change, from my view, is a very good thing.

[SPKrazy]

26. agreed change is a good thing

it's the separation and potentially more separation from my son that is likely the biggest issue for me

[SKKY]

27. Not to quote Bill Clinton here, but, "I feel your pain."

Because when I'm separated from my loved-ones, it's usually for months on end and thousands of miles away. But from my perspective, and not knowing your personal situation, an hour seems workable, no?

[SPKrazy]

30. perhaps

and we shall see

just tossing the idea around

workable, maybe.

thanks

[Indi Guy]

25. (one "pro") You can introduce your son to a new (for him) culture?...

???

[FloridaJudy]

28. It would depend on a number of factors

If the cost of living is higher, maybe the wages are higher as well, so it might balance out.

What kind of custody arrangement do you and your ex have? If you only have your son on weekends, or for weeks at a time, then one hour each way doesn't sound so bad. But if you're having to drive him back and forth several times a week, it could be exhausting. I do know a couple who lived quite a ways apart who met half-way during the switch-overs, so no one had to make the entire drive. Are you on good enough terms for that?

Most important, would you have a decent support group where you're going: friends, family, interest groups? I think we have a friend in common: do many of his friends hang out in the new place? That would be the most important factor to me.

[SPKrazy]

31. All good points and questions

and yes there is a great number of friends there in the new place.

all the rest are questions without answers at this point.

thanks Judy

:hug:

[TZ]

29. Perspective here

While I know you feel an hour away from your son seems a little far, let me comment on something here. My parents divorced in 1975. In 1980, my Dad's job in the area ended and he had to be transferred...500 miles away from us. That was very hard. To me, an hour seems not too bad. If the positives outweigh the negative on the move, I don't think you should let that relatively short distance bother you..in this age of phone, e-mail etc, I wouldn't think it be overly burdensome. But I do understand that the separation will probably be very hard. I have very clear memeories of my Dad telling us about moving..I was 11..but it stands out in my mind.

[SPKrazy]

32. Ok (all three)

Some interesting perspective Turtlensue

no an hour isn't that far

your perspective is greatly appreciated too.

:hug:

[RainDog]

33. Where are you in the aching heart part

of a divorce?

Those of us who have been away for a while don't really know everyone's situation... that's why I apparently made some comment that had nothing to do with your situation around Christmas time.

In a larger city, one hour could be across town in rush hour.

but if you're going through all the early parts of a divorce - do you need to add more stress now? Moving and finding a job are two stressful things, on top of a divorce, which is like ten stressful events rolled into one. but like I say, I don't know where you are in that whole world.

[SPKrazy]

34. yeah it wouldn't be right now

I'm thinking a lot of things and just tossed that one out.

thanks for the perspective though

and lots of people do commute this drive to work here.

:hi:

[Inchworm]

36. I don't wanna sway your decision one way or another

but are you testing to see just how much one man can take at once? :P

If it were me, I'd give it some time.

Oh, and GOOD Morning bud!

:hug:

[SPKrazy]

40. no, i'm just pondering

my life in general

and thinking of well, i dunno

:hug:

[ThomCat]

37. Me personally, I wouldn't do it.

With the economy going into a long difficult recession, I'd stay in an inexpensive area. And I wouldn't want to be that far away from my child. :(

But you have good reasons for wanting to move.

So it's a reasonable thing to do if you want to move. Either way though, I hope you do what's best for you in the long run. :)

[SPKrazy]

41. thanks Thom

:hug:

I'm particularly down about it all right at the moment anyway

[EFerrari]

39. My sons' dad moved away after our divorce.

The boys never really got over it. They went from having a great dad to no dad except for special occasions.

Did I say, they never got over it? He should have just knee capped them and handed them a crack pipe.

:shrug:

[SPKrazy]

42. oh my

:cry:

I'm sorry

:hug: