sleep well, grandma. i will miss you

[fizzgig]

my grandmother passed away this morning. she was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer last march. none of the grandkids knew, she didn't want us to know but apparently she was going to tell us this weekend.

i should have known something was up when she was a bit wishy washy when i told her i wanted to visit in april.

i'm in shock. i didn't expect this. at all. i feel selfish for being angry at her for not wanting us to know.

she was a life-long democrat. was a delegate at the 1996 dnc. she worked for an afscme local for more than 40 years and retired just before her diagnosis. i'll forgive her for backing hillary.

she always made the best coffee. she grew up in new orleans and drank nothing but french market. you could feel the enamel melt from your teeth and hair sprouting from your chest after the first sip.

sometimes for lunch we'd share a fruit and cheese platter, washing it down with boxed chardonnay...it always surprised me she drank boxed wine...that was not her, but it was.

my heart hurts but is numb at the same time

eta: she was very much your typical jewish grandmother. she'd always tell me i looked hungry and practically shoved food down my throat. she lived in new york and although she didn't have the accent, she did when i heard her in my head :rofl:

[MonkeyFunk]

1. Oh, I'm so sorry.

:hug:

[fizzgig]

2. thanks, monkey

:hug:

[redwitch]

3. I am very sorry for your loss.

:hug:

[fizzgig]

6. thanks

:hug:

[laylah]

88. It is done...

Mother-in-law/Grandma has been laid to rest. I couldn't be there my baby for reasons she understands. She was a very good and strong woman. I weep as I write this...she will be sorely missed!

I love you all, my Sara-girl! :cry: :loveya: MaMa

edited for clarity and spelling and 'cuz I am holding my own private Irish wake for that awesome Jewish woman

[Fran Kubelik]

4. Oh shit. I am so sorry.

:hug:

Why do people think they are protecting us by not telling us things that it's very important that we know? I will never understand that.

I am so sorry.

[fizzgig]

7. thanks, fran

daddy said she was scared and didn't really talk much about it to anyone

:hug:

[Sugar Smack]

5. I'm sorry, honey.

:hug: Get some rest, my friend. I'll be thinking about you.

[fizzgig]

10. thanks sugar

we're trying to pull all the reservations together now

:hug:

[Sugar Smack]

11. You please do right by yourself now.

It's the only thing you can do. All my love and prayers are with you and your family.

[fizzgig]

37. my sister and i are at dad's now

it's going to be a quiet night

[Xipe Totec]

8. Never Surrender

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_mesg&forum=105&topic_id=5015339&mesg_id=5016220

[fizzgig]

15. that is beautiful

thank you

[Guava Jelly]

9. Oh no..I'm sorry

:hug: She sounds like a wonderful lady.

[fizzgig]

17. she was a tough nut to crack

but when she laughed, she sounded like a happy little girl

thank you

:hug:

[YellowRubberDuckie]

12. I'm so sorry....

Your grandmother sounds like she was a hoot.
I hope you find some comfort. :hug:
Duckie

[fizzgig]

23. thanks duckie

she was a fun lady. i only ever heard her swear once and that was when my grandfather nearly ran us over pulling the car out of a parking spot...i don't know that i'd ever laughed so hard

:hug:

[NMDemDist2]

13. oh no! I'm so sorry.

pancreatic cancer is so fast and not being able to say goodbye must hurt.

:hug:

[fizzgig]

25. it hurts a lot

thanks

:hug:

[BlueIris]

14. My condolences. Grandmas are one of the best things ever.

[fizzgig]

26. thanks blueiris

[Haole Girl]

16. What great memories you have

I'm sorry for your loss. :hug:

[fizzgig]

27. it's good to be able to smile a bit

thanks

:hug:

[DeposeTheBoyKing]

18. I'm so sorry for your loss

She sounds like a lovely person. My deepest condolences.

[fizzgig]

28. thanks, dtbk

i'm glad i got to know her

[livetohike]

19. My sympathy to you and your family kagehime

:hug: Your Grandmother sounds like a wonderful person.

I lost my Grandfather and my Dad to pancreatic cancer....like you, I wasn't told what was wrong with my Grandfather and his death was a shock (I lived several states away).

You have great memories of your Grandmother and they will comfort you in the days to come.

[fizzgig]

29. it's the shock is making it difficult

i'm sorry you had to go through the same thing

:hug:

[flvegan]

20. I'm sorry for your loss, kagehime.

Sounds like she was well-loved.

[fizzgig]

30. thank you

we had some good times together

[skater314159]

21. I'm so sorry for your loss...

I'm sending love vibes to you and your family. If you need or wanna talk, you can PM me.

:loveya: :hug: :grouphug: :hug: :loveya:

:hippie:
skater pi

[fizzgig]

32. thanks skater

it helps to have everyone here

:hug:

[laylah]

22. ...

:cry: She was something else, wasn't she, sweetheart. She never quite got used to me (ducky umbrellas and all :rofl:) but she was always good to me. I spoke with Grandpa after Daddy called me. He sounds so sad. I asked if anyone is staying with him tonight and he said he didn't want anyone to because he hasn't "had a cry" yet. She'll be greatly missed. You take good care of each other out there in Colorado, ya hear? I told Daddy I would gladly go with you all to NY but he doesn't want me to, which is okay. I love you all very much :loveya:

edited for spelling

[fizzgig]

33. i love you, my mommy

we're sticking together tonight

:hug:

[laylah]

35. I love you too

my sweetheart :hug:

[Dangerously Amused]

24. Aw, kagey.

So sorry, my girl. :hug: :cry:

It sounds like maybe she didn't want to tell you at first because she thought everything was perfect just the way it was, and she was afraid of upsetting that balance.

Anyway. What a wise and lovely woman, and what a tremendous loss. I am so sorry, honey.

Love and peace to you and Grandma.

:hug:

[fizzgig]

34. thanks, da

part of me thinks she didn't want to upset us. either way, nothing can be changed now

:hug:

[Catshrink]

31. I'm sorry for your loss

thanks for sharing a bit of her story. She sounds like a great lady!

[fizzgig]

36. she was a great lady

i just hope she knew i thought so

[Deja Q]

38. .

:(
:hug:

[fizzgig]

40. ...

:hug:

[sicksicksick_N_tired]

39. If you mourn her death rather than celebrate her life, I guarantee,...she'd kick your ass!!!

Seriously!!!!

:hug:

[fizzgig]

42. i'm sure she would

thanks for the smile

:hug:

[PeaceNikki]

41. Peace and comfort to you and your family.

:hug:

I can almost hear your grandma's accent, too. :)

[fizzgig]

44. thanks, nikki

:hug:

she never called me bubula, but she always did when i'd hear 'that' voice :)

[Oeditpus Rex]

43. Aw, sweets, I'm so sorry

That's the best description of a cuppa coffee I've ever read. How wonderful to have memories like that.

:hug:

[fizzgig]

45. one of my first thoughts was how much i'm going to miss her coffee

and sharing it with her over pastry

thanks :hug:

[CaliforniaPeggy]

46. I am so sorry, my dear kagehime...

That's a tough place to be, finding out these facts now...

And you have every right to be angry...After all, you didn't get to say goodbye!

She wanted to be in charge, much as she had been all her life...

And then, boom, suddenly, she's gone...

And you're grieving...

Both the loss and the inability to say goodbye...

Safe passage to her...

Hugs to you, sweetie... :hug: :hug:

[fizzgig]

47. thanks, peggy

i just wish i'd been able to tell her i love her one last time :hug:

[CaliforniaPeggy]

48. I hear that, sweetie...

We can never say it enough, can we?

You can be sure, though, that she knew you do love her...:hug:

[Cabcere]

49. Oh honey, I'm so sorry.

:hug: :pals: :grouphug: Sending good vibes your way.

[fizzgig]

50. thanks sweetie

:hug:

[SPKrazy]

51. SO sorry dear...

:hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:

sleep well Grandma

[fizzgig]

53. thanks my friend

had some extra salt rubbed in that wound just a bit ago...i'll tell you about it later

[SPKrazy]

58. ...

:hug: :hug: :hug:

[Inchworm]

52. Sorry kagehime

you and yours are in my thoughts.

:hug:

[fizzgig]

54. thanks inchy

:hug:

[rockymountaindem]

55. Kaddish

I'm sorry for your loss :hug:

[fizzgig]

56. thank you

:hug:

i'm going to pull that up tonight so i can say it before bed

[laylah]

59. ..

http://www.jewishvirtuallibrary.org/jsource/Judaism/kaddish.html :hug:

[hippywife]

57. I'm too tired to say more but

I really hope this will suffice for now. My condolences, sweetie. :hug:

[fizzgig]

60. that is more than enough

thank you :hug:

[ScreamingMeemie]

61. I am so sorry for your loss.

I will keep you in my thoughts.

[fizzgig]

64. thank you, mrs. g

my love to you as well

[Mz Pip]

62. So sorry for your loss

RIP

Mz Pip
:dem:

[fizzgig]

65. thank you

[LeftyFingerPop]

63. kagehime, I am very sorry for your loss

:hug: :hug:

[fizzgig]

66. thank you, philboy

:hug:

[mconvente]

67. i'm so sorry...

I lost my grandfather in october and I still just have moments of desire to hear his voice again and talk. But I'm sure he'll be the first one to great your grandmother in heaven, because he was such a great character. She is in good hands now.

[fizzgig]

72. thank you

i know she got a warm welcome

[Redstone]

68. Go easy, Grannie. My condolences to you and your family, kagehime.

Redstone

[fizzgig]

74. she passed in her sleep, in her own bed

a blessing to be sure

thanks redstone

[Danger Mouse]

69. i love you, darling, and i am here, as always...

:hug:

[fizzgig]

75. ...

:hug:

[Danger Mouse]

79. this week baby...

i will hold you in my arms.

[RFKHumphreyObama]

70. I'm so very sorry Kagehime

My deepest and sincerest thoughts, prayers, condolences and sympathies to you and your family. I'm so very sorry -I know how hard it is to lose a grandparent

That was a beautiful tribute to your grandmother and your love for her just came flowing through in that post. She sounds like a wonderful woman and a first-class grandmother and I know that the legacy of her love and kindness will live on in the hearts and minds of those she loved and those whose lives she touched.

May your grandmother rest in peace. Once again, I'm so, so very sorry and my deepest and sincerest thoughts, prayers and condolences are with you, your family and all those who knew your grandmother:hug: :hug: :hug:

I'll post a poem that has been posted on here before but nevertheless always brings me great comfort
Do not shed tears when I am gone
But smile instead because I have lived

Do not shut your eyes and pray to God that I'll come back
But open your eyes and see all that I have left behind

I know your heart will be empty because you cannot see me
But I still want you to be full of the love we shared

You can turn your back on tomorrow and live only for yesterday
Or you can be happy for tomorrow because of what happened between us yesterday

You can remember me and grieve that I have gone
Or you can cherish my memory and let it live on

You can cry and lose yourself, become distraught and turn your back on the world
Or you could do what I would want -smile, wipe away the tears, learn to love again and go on

[fizzgig]

76. that is a beautiful poem

thank you so much :hug:

[RFKHumphreyObama]

82. My apologies -I forgot to include the name of the poem

It's called "Remember Me" by David Harkins. I read it at my mother's funeral

We've collected a whole lot of poems relating to the loss of a loved one. If you feel you need any more poems or quotes relating to grief or loss, PM me and I'll send them to you

[Fox Mulder]

71. I'm sorry for your loss.

:( :hug:

[fizzgig]

77. thanks fox

:hug:

[Midlodemocrat]

73. I'm sorry for your loss, kagehime.

:hug:

Safe passage to your grandma.

[fizzgig]

78. thanks, midlo

:hug:

[puerco-bellies]

80. I'm sorry for your loss.

She's in your heart and love is forever.

[Radio_Lady]

81. From another grandmother with ten grandkids, thanks so much for your beautiful post.

I hope I have a special place in the hearts of my at least some of my grandchildren when I leave this life.

Here's an illustration from the cover of "The Great Silent Grandmother Gathering" by author Sharon Mehdi. I love to look at these happy gals! The book is short but the message has much impact.

You can read about it here:

http://www.grandmotherbook.com/



We took our two local grandchildren to see the "Hannah Montana" 3-D movie on Saturday. It was a birthday present to our granddaughter, who turned 10 years old on January 31st.

Hannah Montana/Miley Curtis sang a song called "I Miss You" -- which she wrote in memory of her grandfather.
It was so beautiful. I choked up and actually let out a few sobs during that whole song.



I never knew my biological grandmother on my father's side, Eva. She died of blood poisoning after a botched abortion. She already had four children ages 12, 11, 5, and 4. I am named after her. In the Jewish tradition, her younger sister Ruth married my grandfather Harry. Grandma Ruth was only 21 when she took on all those stepkids. She lived in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania and we only saw her occasionally.

My other Grandma Ida also lived in Pittsburgh, and moved to Los Angeles, where she spent the rest of her life. She and my mother were not close, either in distance or personality. We lived in Miami, Florida, during a time when air flight was not so available.

Ironically, Grandma Ida also died of pancreatic cancer.

Cordially,

Radio Lady Ellen in Oregon

[krispos42]

83. Sorry, kagehime

That's rough, rough indeed.

:hug:

[applegrove]

84. So sorry for your loss.

[Flaxbee]

85. I'm sorry, kagehime

I still miss my grandma - sometimes it just hits me, and she's been gone almost 20 years. There is nothing quite like a grandma's love.

:hug:

[GoddessOfGuinness]

86. I'm so sorry for your loss, Kagehime

It's harder when it's a shock, though I'm sure she probably thought she was sparing you some grief.
Keeping you and all your family in my thoughts... :hug::hug::hug:

[VenusRising]

87. My heartfelt condolences, sweetie.

May the memories of your grandmother keep her alive in your heart always.

:hug:

[momto3]

89. I am very sorry for your loss. eom

[LaraMN]

90. Awww, sweetie...

Hugs and love to you.

:hug: :hug: :hug:

[laylah]

92. Thanks Lara..the point

of this "recussitation" is that gram/mother-in-law is now buried. I (the dil, mom o' sara) could not be there but we are sad. thank you for your response...:hug:

[GreenPartyVoter]

91. I am so sorry *hugs*