I got called in for Jury duty.

[ThomCat]

I was hoping it'd get buy with being on standby and never get called in. No such luck.

8 times they've tried to put me on medical malpractice trials. :rofl:

1 time they tried to put me on a gun trial. I grew up with guns and used to own one. That was apparently enough to disqualify.

They have 3 tries before I get to go home. What kinds of trials do you think they'll throw me at this time? :)

[DarkTirade]

1. My psychic powers tell me that they'll try and make you be on the jury

for a trial involving a lawsuit about an overly-sharp kitchen knife and a clumsy cook.

... or not, ya never know. :P

[ThomCat]

2. Totally innocent!

:rofl:

[ZombieNixon]

3. Something involving a hit and run with a scooter gets my vote.

:P

[ThomCat]

5. I gotta find that crazy person Guilty!

There's no way I'm sharing the sidewalks. x(

:P

[LeftyMom]

4. Civil trial involving cheapassed insurance company. Land speed record broken in dismissing you.

[ThomCat]

6. Oh hell yes.

They'd dismiss me before I even got my ass in the room.

"Your honor? That guy over there. Please make him leave. Right now. He scares us." :scared:

:P

[LeftyMom]

9. We can't have people who've ever had a health problem on a health care case!

They're biased! Unusually healthy people with adequate access to care they don't ever need to avail themselves of are a much better representatives of the population as a whole. :sigh:

[Inchworm]

7. Do it if ya can get called

especially if you've never done it before.

Go in scooter too lol. Chances are they'll have to bring whatever courtroom you go in up to code :D

The trial will be held off 2 days while they put in ramps.

I kid.

I was in a 3 week malpractice one once. Was very interesting. In the end we realized how silly and frivolous the whole thing was. A family sued a doctor because he did surgery on the dead guy 2 years prior to his death. The man was 97.

The family was just trying to sue anyone because someone died of old age.

G'luck and hello!

:hi:

[ThomCat]

10. I would love to serve on a jury at some point.

It just always seems like they call me at the worst possible times.

Maybe there just aren't any best possible times. :shrug:

:hi:

[Donk Yore]

8. I was too a couple of years ago

I told them what my profession was, and they never contacted me again.

[ThomCat]

11. Oh?

What profession is that?

I'm a corporate consultant. That seems to scare a lot of people. :P

[Donk Yore]

12. Working with kids in foster care

[ThomCat]

14. Ah. You're an advocate for all those young hooligans!

That explains it. :P

[citizen4democrats]

13. Pretend you can't speak english.

It works!

[ThomCat]

15. If I knew some other language I might be able to pull that off.

:rofl:

[KamaAina]

16. Repeat after me: "Aloha awakea kakou. 'O ThomCat ko'u inoa."

("Good day, everyone. My name is ThomCat.")

They will instantly assume you are a member of NY's burgeoning Hawaiian-speaking community, and that will be that. :-)

Failing that, if any portion of the courthouse(s), jury box, or whatever turns out to be inaccessible, the magic phrase, in English, is Tennessee v. Lane. It's one of the few ADA cases we've actually won.

edit: punctuation; also, Lane was a defendant rather than a juror, but the case did establish that court facilities must be ADA-accessible.

[ThomCat]

24. Very cool!

The language lesson and the citation. :)

I have the day off from work tomorrow regardless of what happens, so let's hope they let me go home very quickly. :P

[Catbird]

17. Remind yourself why there are juries

Juries are not always right and certainly are no fun to serve on. But think about the alternatives!

By the way, I have been called about a couple of times. One week all of the cases were settled; no juries were needed. The other time was traffic court with lots of DUI cases. The lawyers apparently didn't want DUI victims on the juries, especially if they indicated strong opposition to state law on DUIs.

[pitohui]

20. the alternative should be trained specialists in the law not random fuckwits off the street

the jury system doesn't work and it's a serious flaw in our system, we now know from DNA studies that juries have no ability whatsoever to judge between guilt and innocence even in very important cases where, one would hope, they are actually paying attention to what's going on


we have no idea how many people are found guilty of things they didn't do in cases where there is no DNA evidence to be had, such as property crimes, but since i personally know a least two such people and it isn't like i hang with convicted criminals ALL day long, i assume the number must be huge

the jury system doesn't work and it needs to be changed, badly, as long as people mouth platitudes about "duty" and pretend they are doing something good instead of participating in evil, then it ain't gonna get changed

if you had heart disease, you wouldn't want six random know-nothings to vote on whether or not you got heart surgery, you'd want a trained specialists, backed up the second and third opinion of other trained specialists to make that determination

well, being convicted of a crime is just as life changing as a health crisis and there is no sane reason why an accused person should have their fate in the hands of six to twelve random joe know-nothings deliberately picked for their lack of interest in the news and their lack of knowledge of anything useful

maybe a jury was the best they could think of back in the 1700s but crap we've had a few advances in knowledge since then!

[ThomCat]

25. Juries are rife with prejudices.

Nobody leaves that shit at home. :(

It'll definitely be interesting in the jury room if I end up on a jury. :P

[Infomaniac]

18. Growing Medicinal Marijuana

for use by chronic pain sufferers. Please get on that jury.

[ThomCat]

26. That would be Awesome.

"Jury Nullification! There, can we all go home now?" :P

[pitohui]

19. they called me while i was in africa

i have no idea what they expect me to do about it or how i was supposed to know, no electricity and sure as shit no snail mail from back home -- how can you ask someone to report for something in 10 days in a world where people actually travel, have jobs, have businesses, schedule surgeries, etc?

i found the letter when i got back and fired off a letter explaining i was unavailable during the time period in question, hopefully i'll hear no more about it

[ThomCat]

27. If being out of touch in another continent doesn't cover it

then our legal system has even more flaws in it than we know. :P

[Steven_S]

21. I just got one myself..

Last time they sat me they asked if I have any cops in the family. When I answered yes, seven, they said thank you for your time, (meaning no thanks)

I'm sending in a letter this time, I'm not even gonna bother going down there.

Whatever it is, I hope you don't get one of those LONG TRIALS!!!

:)

[ThomCat]

28. I think I can pick any one of a few medical reasons

why I can't serve. :P

"I sit for 30 minutes at a time and then I need to walk and stretch out my back for 5 minutes."

"I take narcotic painkillers several times a day. My ability to focus and concentrate, and my mood, varies considerably throughout the day."

"I need bathroom breaks NOW!"

"My wheelchair won't fit in that jury box, and I can't sit on those wooden benches." (They still have wooden benches in the local courthouse.)

Even if it's a trial I'd like to serve, there's no way in hell I'll be there for long.

[KitchenWitch]

22. You will get a personal injury case

Guaranteed.

[ThomCat]

29. Somehow, I think you're right.

Or a drug case. I can feel it coming. :)

I'll be carrying my pharmacy with me. I always do. If they ask questions about drug use, or what I think about legal versus illegal drugs then we'll all have an interesting morning. :P

[UrbScotty]

23. Is it at the Hague?

Eh, probably not, huh?

[ThomCat]

30. Is George Bush a defendant yet?

x(

I'd volunteer for that jury.

[UrbScotty]

33. I'm not sure they could possibly find an impartial jury for that trial

[BrotherBuzz]

31. Just throw a handful of mothballs in your coat pocket and cast your fate to the wind...

so to speak. Some authorities say you'll be shown the door by noon.:rofl:

[ThomCat]

35. Oh, the problem with that is going to be

that I have to smell it too. :(

[Richardo]

32. Someone parking in a Handicapped Zone

Throw the book at 'em!

[ThomCat]

34. Oh Yeah!

x(

I find out in an hour what happening. :)