Stuff White People Like!

[Runcible Spoon]

Yep THIS pretty much hits all the biggies :evilgrin:

[electricmonk]

1. That was great

#37 Renovations
All white people are born with a singular mission in life in order to pass from regular whitehood into ultra-whitehood. Much like how Muslims have to visit Mecca, all white people must eventually renovate a house before they can be complete.

Of course, most white people do not reach this goal until they are 35 or older. But the need to do it is as instinctual as walking.
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That's me at the moment. Of course by the time I finish I'll have to start all over to keep up with whatever's trendy then.

The Apple and Whole Foods entries were pretty funny too.

[ZombieNixon]

2. Fuck...

I'm the whitest non-white person I know....:evilfrown:

[Reverend_Smitty]

4. It's alright we'll invite you into the fold...

Meetings are held on the third Tuesday of each month next we will be discussing organic produce and Indie music. The microbrews will flow freely and don't forget to wear your ironic hipster t-shirt! :hi:

[Nailzberg]

3. It's funny cause its true.

We're so lame.

[TreasonousBastard]

5. Hilarious!

[Tafiti]

6. Funny, ...

...somebody introduced me to this website just today! Nuts. And yes, hilarious.

[cbayer]

7. We like to dance

badly.

[AnneD]

22. with an overbite....

:evilgrin:

[CreekDog]

8. I like this quote, about "Dogs":

"When actual children are born, the dog is not displaced but rather remains as the most important member of the household. This is because of the fact that white children will eventually hate their parents, but dogs will love anyone who feeds them."

[ghostsofgiants]

9. I do love Mos Def and Michel Gondry.

[harmonicon]

10. amazing

painfully spot-on. Far too much of it applies to me, but it also gives a lot of examples about why I hate whitey.

[Dukkha]

11. I didn't see it but I believed they missed

adopting third world babies, then showing them off in magazines like they were collectibles

ooh another one. collectibles, like $500.00 resin casts of Super heroes.

[Runcible Spoon]

12. KICK for the day crowd!

[Shell Beau]

13. Nope! I hate sushi!

:P

[Bake]

14. I like puppies.

Bake

[northernsoul]

15. seems more like stuff white yuppies like

n/t

[CJCRANE]

20. Agreed, it's more about yuppies

and reverse-snobbery.

[Phillycat]

16. This is the best thing that's ever happened.

[zanne]

17. "Knowing what's best for poor people". Yup. nt

[DS1]

18. I don't like plays, Sarah Silverman, indie, that director listed,

apple products, marathons, two last names, gifted kids, wes anderson movies

[Runcible Spoon]

19. you can't win, Mr. Original.

Even being "ironic" is a White Person Thing! :evilgrin:

[CJCRANE]

21. I like the one about indie bands.

I've recently been turned onto Arcade Fire.

Am I already out of date..? Anyone know what the next "in" indie band is?

[Richard Steele]

23. As a white person, it kind of bothers me that....

...I hadn't seen that awesome blog before!

Oh, that's good stuff right there!:rofl:

[Bucky]

24. We like black musicians performing for us.

[racaulk]

25. ROFL!!!

Yeah, that's pretty funny! :)

[ok_cpu]

26. #4 Assists

When you say the word “assist,” first thing you think about is Steve Nash and Wayne Gretzky. White people love to pass, it’s no secret.

[Dukkha]

27. judging by some of their blog comments

"Not having a sense of humor" should rank as #1. This is one of my favorite blogs now. Hilarious! I certainly fit in on a few of those. One of my white lifestyle obsessions should be listed: collecting vinyl LP records. It's elite and makes me feel superior to mp3 listeners ;-)

[Runcible Spoon]

28. the guy who blogs this answered my email within a day...

says he loves new suggestions. Let me know what you want up there. I would like to see:

-Beer pong and other competitive drinking
-attempting to organically insert big words into everyday speech
-Roller Derby fetishism and overrating roller derby girls' looks merely bc of their Betty Page hair/tattoos/t-shirts

[last_texas_dem]

29. Wow, I'm not nearly as white as I thought I was!

From what I've read, quite a bit of it seems pretty accurate in terms of describing a certain breed of white people. I do think a few parts were a little harsh, but others were quite funny as well. And yeah, I'm not really that white- in terms of the definition put forth by that blog. Or maybe I'm just the "wrong kind" of white person. haha (I don't like Sarah Silverman OR Dane Cook, FWIW...)

[HughBeaumont]

30. Man, more-hipstery-than-thou white people DO like all this crap!!

Sarah Silverman, Michel Gondry, Mos Def (who's IN a Michel Gondry film), "marijuana-is-awesome" to the point of ass-kicking annoyance, film festivals, making you feel bad for staying inside, etc. Shit.

I must not be all that hip because so far, I'm not really into ANYthing highlighted in this blog. It's still funny because it's so true.

[Steven_S]

31. I could not relate to any of it...

None. I've been in the Bronx so long that I'm not even white anymore!!!11!

[DarkTirade]

32. ... am I the only one who didn't really find this funny?

:shrug:

[Runcible Spoon]

34. it's OK, there are support groups for that..

which is also a White Thing :rofl:

[Phillycat]

35. Yes.

[underpants]

33. ....

!

[Ellen Forradalom]

36. Yep. That's me all over

Let's see: Michel Gondry, check; Prius, check; marathon running, check; gentrification, check; recycling, check; bicycles, check; the list goes on. Put your sunglasses on to protect your eyes from my blinding whiteness!

[Richardo]

37. #62 Knowing what’s best for poor people

:rofl:
February 10, 2008 by clander

White people spend a lot of time of worrying about poor people. It takes up a pretty significant portion of their day.

They feel guilty and sad that poor people shop at Wal*Mart instead of Whole Foods, that they vote Republican instead of Democratic, that they go to Community College/get a job instead of studying art at a University.

It is a poorly guarded secret that, deep down, white people believe if given money and education that all poor people would be EXACTLY like them. In fact, the only reason that poor people make the choices they do is because they have not been given the means to make the right choices and care about the right things.



A great way to make white people feel good is to tell them about situations where poor people changed how they were doing things because they were given the ‘whiter’ option. “Back in my old town, people used to shop at Wal*Mart and then this non-profit organization came in and set up a special farmers co-op so that we could buy more local produce, and within two weeks the Wal*Mart shut down and we elected our first Democratic representative in 40 years.” White people will first ask which non-profit and are they hiring? After that, they will be filled with euphoria and will invite you to more parties to tell this story to their friends, so that they can feel great.

But it is ESSENTIAL that you reassert that poor people do not make decisions based on free will. That news could crush white people and their hope for the future.
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Classic! :rofl:

[Richardo]

38. That is the funniest website I've seen in a long time...

Thanks for that now bookmarked link. :rofl:

[Yavin4]

39. That Site Is Hysterical, Fucking Brilliant

#57 Juno:


On another note, the film takes place in a fictional suburban town in Minnesota, but imagine the same storyline in say West Baltimore or Socorro, TX. My guess is that there would be less qurkiness, less acoustic guitar and zero references to Dario Argento. Teen pregnancy is not as big a problem in the suburban midwest as it is in urban centers or border towns, therefore it is acceptable to not only green light a movie shedding light on teen pregnancy but it is okay to laugh at the situation and add a killer indie soundtrack.
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Devastatingly brutal and hilarious all at the same time.

[Commie Pinko Dirtbag]

40. Wow, I'm so non-white it isn't even funny.

But then again, I'm a native of South America, which makes my albedo irrelevant.